


Lonesome No More

by Winter22



Series: Lonesome No More Series [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Action & Romance, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Comfort, Comfort/Angst, Drama & Romance, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, F/M, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Steve Rogers, Romantic Fluff, Sex, Sexual Tension, Sexy Times, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2021-01-03 10:09:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 104,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21177695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winter22/pseuds/Winter22
Summary: A slow burn, plot heavy romance where Alexis, a woman with abilities she is still learning to control, forms a special bond with Bucky Barnes. She's someone who can help with his past, his pain, and most of all: will love him regardless of all those things. Their bond will have its challenges, but can they overcome them to find the love they deserve in one another? (love, sex, fluff, hurt/comfort, drama!)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Notes: This is my first Avengers fic, so I hope I can do them all justice as I continue writing it. If any of you are familiar with the female character "Rogue" from the comics, I took the idea of her talents and abilities and gave them to the lead female character in this story. With her being a potential love interest of Bucky's, I decided to see what might happen if I played around those abilities and how they might help, or hurt, Bucky. I'm a HUGE fan of the Winter Soldier, as well as Captain America, so they will be major players in this story going forward.

For the past two weeks, Alexis studied the folders until she had each of the stories within them practically memorized. Each person within the folders had a story; unique and tragic and heroic. She stared at their pictures. She studied their talents. She went through them one by one, giving them each their due attention. And yet, with the knowledge she felt she'd equipped herself with, _nothing _could prepare her for what waited for her at the Avengers Headquarters.

And so, as she found herself on her way to the Avengers compound - in a limousine provided by _Stark Industries - _Alexis decided to run through the files one more time. Mostly it was out of nervous energy, as well a strong desire to avoid the limo driver's eyes as he continued to stare at her in the review mirror.

After flipping through the stack one final time, there was only one folder that Alexis continued to avoid reading.

Her own S.H.I.E.L.D. folder.

It sat on her lap staring up at her. She hesitated opening it, afraid of what her entire life might look like when it was written down in an official file. This time, though, she forced herself to read it anyways:

_**Document Citizenship: **_ United States  
_**Name:**_ Alexis R. Markos  
_**Alias/Nicknames: **_ Alex  
_**Date of Birth**_ : March 19, 1992  
_**Sex**_ : Female  
_**Title: **_ Avenger Recruit  
_**Height: **_ 5'7"  
_**Weight: **_ 150 lbs  
_**Hair:**_ Black  
_**Eyes**_ : Brown  
_**Identifiable Markings**_ : Half-sleeve tattoo on right arm. Small birth mark on bottom left abdomen.  
_**Parents**_ : Deceased  
_**Next of Kin:**_ Sister. 23 years old.  
_**Hometown**_ : Gloucester, Massachusetts  
_**Ethnicity**_ : Greek  
_**Qualifications for S.H.I.E.L.D recruitment: **_ _ Mutant human. Ability to absorb, and sometimes remove, subject's memories, physical strength, and superpowers by physical touch.  
_

Alexis shut the folder and stared out the window. She exhaled the sigh she had been holding in, feeling a little bit of the anxiety finally release. Time passed, and the terms used to describe her in her file faded, giving way now to the view beyond her window. "Immense" seemed the wrong word to describe what she saw, but the Avengers building was nothing short of a silver giant looming before her.

Tony was the first to greet her. He, above all others, was the Avenger Alex was the most familiar with, albeit from somewhat of a distance. She'd been acquainted with his name, his lineage, and what he'd done to try and rewrite that lineage. More importantly: she'd seen him on the news. _Numerous _times.

When Tony first contacted her, she felt suddenly exposed. The secret she kept hidden successfully for so long had been outed by someone...somewhere...and Nick Fury had caught wind. Not exactly the first person Alex wanted knowing about her_ gift. _Tony had assured her that now, unlike all the years before, she no longer had to hide. She could put her gift to great use and become one of them.

As her limousine pulled up to the entrance of the behemoth building, Alex could see the obvious enjoyment in Tony's expression as he approached the curb. He opened the door for her as she stepped out, his handsome face brightening. "Well, well." His tone was as proud as the smirk he wore. "Alexis Markos. So glad to finally meet you."

"Tony." Alex extended a hand to shake his. "A long time coming, isn't it? And please, call me Alex."

As they shook hands, it was then that Tony realized she was wearing form-fitting leather gloves. He eyed her curiously. "Safety precaution, I'm guessing?"

"Didn't want to take any chances" she answered honestly. "Not with some of the powerhouses inside there." She eyed the building in emphasis.

Tony seemed impressed already. "Fair enough. First impressions are everything, aren't they?"

"Which is why I see you went with your normal attire." She said this jokingly, but there was truth to her words. It was hard to ignore the impeccable suit that adorned Tony's body, as well as the fact that he'd obviously prepped himself ahead of time for their meeting. "Lookin' good as always, Stark."

"I know" His eyes narrowed on hers, his hands clasping in front of his very expensive belt. "So...You ready for this?"

"As ready as I can be."

"Well then, allow me to escort you to the rest of your life."

Tony lead the way, and Alex felt the heaviness of his words weighing on her for longer than they should have. They walked a little, the sound of Alex's heels the only sound between them.

"Were you able to gain anything from the files sent to you ahead of time?" Tony asked her. This time, only a hint of sarcasm was evident in his voice.

"I did. In fact, I read every file to the point of exhaustion."

He nearly stopped walking, staring at her in awe. "You actually _read the files_?" He paused, his disbelief growing. "Nobody reads the files."

"I always read the files" Alex said with a grin.

Tony snorted. "Sounds like you and Rogers are gonna get along juuuust fine." He gave another winning smile as they reached the entrance. Upon opening the door, he swept an arm out towards the doorway in a very characteristic, over-the-top fashion. "Allow me to welcome you to _Avengers Headquarters_."

Alex walked into the main foyer of the Avengers base for the first time and her breath was stolen from her almost immediately. The sheer immensity of the foyer gave only a preview of what else must lay beyond. Her eyes were drawn upwards, staring into the behemoth size of glass dome above. A pair of stairways wound upward, peeling off toward separate wings of the compound. Several uniformed bodies moved about. For them, this was just another day. For Alex, this truly _was _the beginning of the rest of her life.

Realizing she'd fallen behind, Alex quickly caught up to Tony, her eyes still roaming the room. Tony waved a hand over a digital panel that appeared near a doorway and authorized their entrance. Glancing over his shoulder, he snapped his fingers. "Hey. You-whoo."

Alex pulled her gaze back once more, catching a certain look of amusement in Tony's face.

"Don't worry" he told her, a light dancing in his large eyes, "you'll get the full tour and you can gawk all you want then. For now - try and follow me without running into anything."

A dry smile lit up Alex's expression, and she willingly followed behind as Tony lead her onward. She did her very best not to gawk, or to run into anything. Soon enough, they came to the conference room where most of the other Avengers awaited her. She could see them from the hallway, behind tall glass windows looking in on an oval table where they were gathered. To anyone else, they would appear as normal individuals. To Alex, they were one of her own kind; a kind she never thought she'd be a part of, having grown up with the talent - or curse, as she sometimes thought it - she had since birth. Maybe she really _could _put her talent to good use. If the individuals in the room could do it, perhaps she could as well.

As she and Tony walked into the room, all eyes present turned her direction. The first person Alex noticed in the room was Steve: there was no second-guessing the man who bore the title of Captain America. His large frame was unmistakable; the blue of his eyes as distinct as the blue of his uniform. He sat next to a slender red-head, whose scrutinous but kind eyes spotted her with a smile. She stood first, initiating the others to do the same.

Alex and Tony stood at the head of the table, where Tony opened an arm to the woman beside him. "Team, I'd like you to meet Alexis Markos. And Alex..." He paused, a proud smile lighting up his face. "I'd like you to meet the Avengers."

It was Steve who came forward first. He extended a hand, and for the first time, Alex witnessed the brightness in Captain America's smile.

"Steve Rogers" he said formally. "Pleasure to have you with us."

Alex found his handshake as assured as the rest of him. She was barely able to respond before the rest of those standing there came forward to meet her.

"Natasha Romanoff" said the redhead. Alex almost cursed herself for not remembering this was the Avenger called Black Widow. The woman leaned into her as they shook hands. "Thank God you're here...we're seriously lacking women around here." She leaned back, a large smile beaming, and gave Alex a wink.

One by one, she met the rest of the men and women who made up the core team of individuals she would be spending the rest of her life fighting with...or so she hoped. Each one of them were courteous, but it didn't escape Alex that each one of them looked upon her gloved hands with some question in their eyes.

She took note of one particular Avenger: the man who went by the name Bucky, a childhood nickname given to him from Steve Rogers. Alex recalled reading about their close friendship noted in the files, as well as the tragic events that followed them. Their friendship was obvious in the way they looked at one another, stood together, sat together. They moved as one unit, which Alex found quite interesting. It didn't escape her that both of them, though young in appearance, were technically the oldest in the entire building.

And it was the appearance of Bucky that caught her eye the most. He was a dichotomy of features: dark shoulder length hair offset by the brilliant blue of his eyes. The metal arm was alarmingly large for his frame, which was well-built and obviously strong, but the softness of his gaze and the quiet manner of his presence left Alex intrigued.

Not to mention she found him very, _very _attractive.

When Bucky stepped up to meet her, Alex felt her heart rate increase. Their hands met, but Bucky left the metal arm at his side.

"James Barnes" he said, his voice strangely soft and deep. He gave a small but humble smile, which did wonders in brightening his face. "You can call me Bucky."

"I will" Alex replied, matching him with her own smile. "And you can call me Alex."

He nodded, and their handshake ended. He said no more, but their gazes remained fixed on one another. Alex realized in that moment that if she lingered too long, she might get lost in those eyes.

Tony's voice was the interruption that broke their focus. He had stepped up now to the head of the table, ready to address the group as a whole.

"You might be wondering: _Why the gloves?_" He addressed them with a passing look, even as Alex took a standing position next to him. "Alex? Perhaps you'd like to do the honors of explaining your...gift?"

_Gift. _ The word alone was enough to make Alex want to roll her eyes. She held back, but began a story she was no longer ashamed to tell.

All her life, she struggled with human touch. When she was young, her powers were involuntary. She couldn't help absorbing traits from the people closest to her. Family and friends around her soon learned something "weird" happened when they hugged her, and they didn't like it. So...people stopped hugging her. Affection dwindled. Intimate touch was especially difficult, especially in her teens, when she realized she could hurt someone as easily as she could love someone. And so, intimate relationships dwindled as well. She never had a boyfriend for more than a week, if she was lucky. She stopped dating altogether.

As a result of being untrained and unaccustomed to the power she held when she touched someone, Alex devoted the bulk of her teen years to constant personal practice in a desperate attempt to refine her abilities. She finally achieved a level of comfort in handling this so-called _gift _in her late then, after finally harnessing her power, she left Massachusetts and decided to use her newly-honed skills in the only way she could: helping others.

Enter, Nick Fury.  
Enter, the Avengers.

_This _ was the story Alexis told, in so many words, to the Avengers who sat listening. They stared at her with eyes full of understanding, as if some part of her story resonated with them. She figured many of them could at least relate to the loneliness she had. Maybe now, though, she wouldn't be lonely anymore.

As she finished the tale, silence hung in the room. Unsure of what she should say next, she looked away from the stares, and found her eyes settling once more on Bucky's.

Of all things, Bucky gave her a heartfelt smile. His eyes crinkled at the corners, and there was kindness in his gaze.

Alexis felt relief wash over her tense body.  
Bucky understood her.

"So..." Tony began, standing up from chair. "Where do we go from here?"

Some of the Avengers shifted in their chairs, unsure if Tony's question was rhetorical. Steve turned his attention to the others around the table. No one answered.

"May I submit a literal answer?" Tony rocked on his feet slightly. "I say we go to the Practice Room." His dark eyes settled on Alex. "Whaddya say? Give it a test run and see what you can do?"

Alex gave a hesitant smile. "Might as well get it out of the way."

* * *

The "Practice Room" was a massive room the size of a football field, completely enclosed with no weak point anywhere in its construction. It was built to withstand a smash from the Hulk, the throw of Steve's shield, or even a blast from Tony's suit. Its sole purpose was for exactly what was about to happen: to take a new Avenger and test them and their unique talents in a room that wouldn't succumb to those talents. And so it would be with Alex.

Every accessory that belonged to the Avengers was set against the nearby wall. As they assembled themselves and their items of choice within the large arena-like room, Alex used that time to change into her black bodysuit. It was the only one she had; she'd made herself several years back when she first began her nomadic lifestyle of helping those in need. She needed something inconspicuous; something she could wear and remain hidden in shadows as she attempted to use her abilities out in the open. It wasn't much, but it felt like an old friend the moment she put it on.

She walked into the giant arena-like room, feeling more at ease than she had so far. She drew her hair up into a ponytail and away from her face, which was now greatly focused. She watched as her new group of comrades filed in to the huge arena-like room, standing shoulder to shoulder near their gear. As Alex took a standing position in front of them, her sight was soon blocked by the sturdy frame of Steve as he stood before her.

"You sure you're ready?" he asked her.

Alex gave him a steady smile. "Now or never."

Steve turned to the group, hands positioned on his hips. "Alright then. Who wants to go first?"

"With all due respect" Alex interrupted, "I think it would be best if _we_ went first." She motioned between herself and Steve with a sheepish smile. "Been kinda looking forward to this, so..."

Steve's grin lit up his face. "Ladies choice." He gave a firm nod. "I'll follow your lead."

Alex inhaled and squared her shoulders. In her 27 years of having her gift, she'd never done what she was about to do: to use it to duplicate that of another Avenger. This was as much of an experiment for her as any of them. She held out her hands, palms outward, and stepped into Steve's personal space. With her eyes closed, she placed both palms on his chest near his heart: the source of his true gift. Within seconds, she felt the life force that made Steve Rogers _Captain America_ flow through her hands into her body, filling her like a serum of her own. Her head jerked backward, her mouth open and gasping for air, as her body composition began to change; her physical form becoming stronger, her reflexes more agile, and her senses heightened to that of Steve's own level. A pale white light encircled her, shimmering with the intensity of the transfer.

For Steve, he felt a pull that neither hurt nor felt particularly comfortable. It was a strange sensation, as though a warmth was spreading out of his chest, but neither lessening his own abilities nor draining him. He closed his eyes, feeling through the sensation, feeling Alex's closeness to him more than ever now. A link was being made between them, though neither knew it yet.

Around them, the Avengers looked on in wonder as the transformation of Alex took place. It took a total of only 60 seconds before Alex felt herself pull away from Steve by force of the completed transfer. She opened her eyes, blinking as her eyesight adjusted. She could see clearer now; the colors and details about her sharper. She looked down at her arms and her hands: the same as before, but different in ways only she could sense. Balling her hands into fists, she felt a new strength in their grip.

And she craved the shield.

Steve was already on it. Unknowingly so, he sensed it before Alex even thought it. "Alex!" He tossed the shield and Alex raised her hand to catch it. She caught it as solidly as Steve would have.

In a single motion, Alex tossed the shield at the opposite wall, watching as the vibranium weapon skipped off each of the walls, finding its way back to Alex's hands. She caught it effortlessly, redirected it back to the other wall and caught it just the same. Her form was impeccable; it was as if Steve Rogers himself had given her lessons. She chanced a glance at Steve, and when their eyes met, they met with shared respect.

The corner of his mouth lifted into a smirk. "Not bad for a first timer."

Alex casually tightened one of the leather straps that secured her arm to the weapon. "I see why you like this thing" she answered. With a smart-aleck grin, she eyed him. "I suppose you want it back?"

The others in the room silently looked at Steve, awaiting his response.

What Alex didn't foresee in all of this was that instead of just absorbing the talents of each of the Avengers, she ended up being sharing a similar wavelength of thought and action with them. Alex's newfound reflexes caused her to move in sync with Steve: two bodies sharing a biological symmetry.

As a result, Steve anticipated Alex's first punch, just as Alex saw Steve's redirect coming back at her. They parried with one another, blocking punches and kicks and doing battle against one another physically. Each kick was met with a block, each punch or jab was caught by the other. Both of them were completely lost in the focus of their fighting: neither hurting nor taking it easy on the other. Their grunting and heavy breathing was the only mark of their sparring, each a perfect match for the other...until at last Steve tackled Alex to the ground in a body lock.

His blue eyes stared down at her, his face now covered in a sheen of sweat. His smile was beaming as brightly as ever. "I _always_ want my shield back" he said through a heavy exhale.

Alex couldn't help but laugh. "Affirmative, Captain."

Steve extended an open hand to her, offering to help her up. Alex gladly took it, and with a quick lift, she was on her feet again. Calmly, she handed the shield back to him before turning to the others. "Who's next?" When she studied the others, all she saw were wide eyes.

Natasha was the next to step forward, trying to suppress a smirk. "Consider me intrigued." She folded her arms over her chest as she eyed Alex. "Let's see what you've got."

Steve backed away, falling in line beside Bucky and Tony. He watched in silence as Alex put her hands on Nat's shoulders and closed her eyes, beginning the process of transferring Nat's assassin skills into her body. It was more than he could believe to be true: the white light surrounding Alex, the force at which the talents of one moved into the body of the other. It was right up there with the strangeness that he and all the other enhanced humans next to him shared.

When the transfer was complete, Nat and Alex wasted no time at falling into combat with one another. They moved fluidly, becoming a complete mirror of one another. No matter what Natasha delivered to Alex, she was able to deliver right back. To those standing there who knew Nat's reputation as an assassin - the way that Alex matched her move for move was almost unbelievable.

And so it went with the others as they took their turns: Clint's bow and arrows were no match for Alex. Sam's flight suit was an effortless manner of flight. Wanda's magic was as if Alex had been born with it; something even Wanda couldn't claim. She faded back into the line of disbelieving Avengers, each as silent as the next. They all secretly wished that Thor wasn't currently in Asgard; they could only imagine what he would say if Alex tried to wield his beloved _Mjolnir_.

"So how does this work with me?" Tony asked, stepping forward. He glanced back at the other Avengers with a smirk that signaled brewing humor. "Do you just...I don't know...magically understand how the laws of physics work the second you touch me?"

Alex smirked. "It's not like that...not really. I have to focus on your-"

"-Talents, right. And trust me, there's plenty of them." Tony's snark was thick, accompanied only by his doubting eyes. "But I don't _have _a super power. I just happen to be extremely brilliant."

"Nat doesn't have a super power either." Alex's eyes moved towards the redhead approvingly. "She's just that good."

From the line, Nat gave an appreciative nod.

Tony exhaled, obviously frustrated. "Okay, but if I put on the suit, will a suit just magically appear on you?"

"I'd be able to build one, if I wanted to" Alex answered. "Granted, Tony: some of your powers are going to be more useful than others in certain situations. Most of the time, if we completed a transfer, I could help you and Bruce figure stuff out. You know, work with you to get answers on the tough stuff." She glanced between Tony and Bruce, who remained in line with the others looking quite skeptical. "Three talented brains, instead of two."

From the line, Sam snorted. "Only _two, _huh_? _And just what is _that _supposed to mean?"

Steve reached out and put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "She didn't mean it like that."

Bucky stepped forward now, interrupting the chatter. "Alright then, what about me?" All eyes in the practice room turned his direction as he approached Alex. "You won't have a metal arm, so...would it be like Nat? Are you sure my, um..." Shyly, he cleared his throat. "...my _fighting skills_ would transfer?"

Alex saw the apprehension in the steel blue of Bucky's eyes. Something in him was afraid of that transfer, and Alex understood why. Years may have passed, but the soldier before her was still getting back to his old self - the _James Barnes_ self, not the _Winter Soldier_ self - or so his folder had told her. There was so much there she still had to figure out.

She took a step towards him, a smile spreading over her face. "Only one way to find out, Barnes."

Before Bucky had a chance to argue, Alex had placed both hands on him and held tight, guessing he would try and back away from her at first. Sure enough, after decades of torture, Bucky jerked backward at Alex's initial touch. "It's okay." Her voice barely rose above a whisper. "I'll never hurt you."

Bucky nodded, albeit apprehensively. This time, when Alex pressed her hands against him, she made sure her touch was gentle.

The sensation Bucky felt in those first moments was unlike anything he'd felt in his entire life. A warmth spread forth from Alex's hands, one of which was on his metal arm, which was already sensitive to touch in ways his human flesh arm was not. The other was on his chest near his heart; aptly placed. As that warmth quickly overtook his entire body, it was if the hurt, regret, and pain from his past seemed to drain away and into her hands. Little by little, as the seconds ticked by, layers of hurt left him.

Alex's eyes remained shut tight, but she could see everything about Bucky's past flash before her mind's eye. With her hands still pressed to his body, emotions pummeled her, rocking her to the core. _ Pain from his fall. Pain from his mind being wiped. Pain from losing himself. Pain from losing Steve. _ Pain...it was all pain...a thousand forms of pain all hitting her at once in a storm of flashbacks that she could barely stand to watch.

For the onlookers, what was happening between the pair was much different than what had happened between Alex and the others. They stood anxiously, watching as both Bucky and Alex's expressions melded into one of uneasiness, their eyes shut and their mouths opens as their breathing became more ragged. Only when Alex's brow knitted together and she winced in pain did Steve feel the need to interject. He stepped forward hesitantly, only to have Tony reach stop him.

"Let them go" Tony whispered. "I want to see this."

"What if she's in pain?" Steve retaliated. "What if-"

"_I said let them go." _Tony's dark eyes hardened. "It's the only way we can truly know."

Reluctantly, Steve fell silent. He watched on in fear as Alex and Bucky's transfer took place. It didn't comfort him to see that their expressions became more painful than before the longer the process took place.

And then it all went to hell. There was a flash of light as if something exploded between Alex and Bucky. They both went flying off in opposite directions, landing on their backs at least a hundred feet from one another.

Bucky was the first to sit up, his dark hair fallen over his eyes. "Alex?" He shook his head, ridding himself of the strange fog that had blurred his sight. Someone rushed to his side, but his only concern was Alex.

"I'm here, Buck." Steve lent a helping hand, supporting his friend's back as he sat up. "You okay?"

"Alex..." Bucky blinked again, the fog disappearing now. When he finally saw her, the look on her face said it all: something happened between them that left her shocked to silent horror.

Tony and Nat had rushed to Alex's side, but she was too stunned to say anything to them. Her eyes were locked on Bucky; his face the only thing she could concentrate on. Everything she saw, everything she felt...his power, his past, his pain...

"What happened?" Natasha asked, kneeling next to Alex.

Alex could only stare at Bucky in silence. "I- I don't know..." But she _did _know. What happened had been something she never experienced before. It was something she never even knew was possible. Instead of Bucky's super strength, agility, and other manufactured talents he'd received from Hydra, Alex received his suppressed emotions instead. Pain had filled her body, the horrific memories and emotions overtaking her until it was too much to bear. The connection broke in an explosion, zapping Alex of energy and leaving her more depleted than ever before.

Across the floor, Bucky tried to stand, with the help of Steve at his side. "I'm sorry" he muttered. His eyes remained fixed on Alex. "I didn't mean to-"

"Okay, okay, I need answers" Tony interrupted, his fingers wiping anxiously at his goatee. "What the hell just happened? Because what I saw wasn't anything like the other transfers here."

Nat helped Alex to her feet now, holding on just in case Alex felt weaker than she appeared. "I said I don't _know, _Tony" Alex repeated shakily. She gave Nat a nod of thanks, then stood on her own. "I haven't experienced anything like that before."

"Alright, I think that's enough for one day" Steve interjected. His eyes were hard and his tone was full of authority. "She obviously needs some time, and questions can wait."

The group considered one another silently in agreement. Only Tony remained unconvinced. He looked between Natasha, Steve, Bucky, and finally Alex.

"I want answers" he repeated, an index finger pointed at Alex. "Tomorrow."

He turned and left the group behind, exiting the Practice Room without another word.


	2. Chapter 2

Alexis lay motionless on her bed, her skull throbbing in pain. Closing her eyes barely helped, so she lay on her back staring at the plain beige ceiling of her new room. The color was oddly soothing, even though her eyes felt three sizes too large for her eye sockets. Every time she tried to close her eyes and rest, all she saw was Bucky's memories flashing before her. 

Never in any of her previous transfers had she been able to summon a person's memories and emotions like she had with Bucky. It left her in a state of confusion, frustration, and physical pain. The toll the transfer had taken on her body was unlike any other as well; it was as if the emotions hidden within Bucky's psyche tried to onslaught her own. In fighting back against those emotions, her body and mind were quickly depleted.

And so she lay there, listening to nothing. Feeling nothing. Saying nothing. Staring at nothing.

The room that she could call hers now felt like a holding pen. She was a wild animal to the other Avengers. A strange creature to be feared, unable to be trusted. _Exactly _the thing she had hoped wouldn't occur. 

_And here I am_, Alexis thought angrily. _Right back to where I used to be. Different day, same old shit. _

She couldn't lay there any longer. Hopping off the bed, Alex grabbed a hoodie and pulled it over the bodysuit she still wore. She headed through the hallways of the Avenger complex to the front exit, ignoring everyone she passed. She even flipped the hood up over her head to conceal herself further. She wanted to block out everything as best she could, even though she knew she may never be able to run from it the way she wanted. The way she _used _to, back when she was unskilled in handling herself and her power.

Pushing through the massive doors to the chilly evening beyond, Alex already felt less suffocated. She inhaled as deeply as she could, filling her lungs with the crisp fall air. For the moment, she closed her eyes and focused her senses on the slight breeze that tickled her skin. Her senses were heightened now, alive with the energy from earlier and humming like a live wire. Nature grounded her, so the idea to leave her room was already helping.

She let her feet do the rest. Without a real idea of where she wanted to go, especially since it was still only her first day on the compound, Alex stayed to the walking path that encircled the Avenger grounds. The path itself was mostly paved, with a wooden railing lining parts of it as it maneuvered through the gently rolling property. As Alex walked, the sun dipped further along the horizon, turning everything a washed-out shade of gray. She shoved her hands deep within the pockets of her hoodie, doing her best to ward off the evening chill.

She walked for a long while, her head down, her thoughts threatening to consume her. _How much of a problem do the others think I am now? _she wondered. _Do they think I'm a freak? How _much_of a freak? Am I a more of a threat than an ally? Will they send me back? _

That made Alex hesitate. It didn't occur to her until now just how much she feared the Avengers might not _want _her. Fear of that very possibility threatened to make itself at home in her body, so Alex walked faster, as if speed would help her leave the thought on the trail behind her. With her head down, her mind focused on getting rid of the awful sinking feeling in her stomach, she barely noticed someone standing silent on the path ahead. 

When she looked up, her heart jumped in her chest. "Bucky?!"

Dressed in all black, the metal of his arm completely concealed, she almost didn't believe it was him. Not until he turned to face her was she completely convinced.

“Alexis?"

His hair was pulled back into a small ponytail, giving her a full look at the troubled expression he wore. She took a cautious step towards him. "Hi."

"Hi."

_Don't be awkward, _Alex told herself. She took another step forward. "Looks like we both needed some fresh air, huh?"

Again, that tiny, humble smile appeared on Bucky's face, but only for a second. "You could say that."

Out here in the open, beyond the walls of the Avengers headquarters, Alex could really see just how imposing Bucky truly was. Framed against the fading light of the day, the strength he carried in himself was more evident. His shoulders stood out to her the most, followed closely by the width of his abdomen; the perfect framework of a superhero. Earlier, when he stood next to Steve and the others, his impressive stature took second place...but out here, Alex felt dwarfed next to him. There was no doubt that he'd been a warrior, a _fierce _warrior at that, but the quiet grace of his movements and the depth of kindness in his ocean eyes deceived this. 

Alex felt her body humming even louder as she closed the distance between them. Bucky kept his eyes focused on something beyond them, but made no motion that he would leave if she approached him. The only motion he made was to lean over the railing next to the path. Alex swallowed any fear she still had from earlier and took a standing position next to him. She pulled the hood back away from her face, then braced her arms against the wooden railing, mirroring him. 

"Look, Bucky...I just want to say how sorry I am about earlier--"

"--No, it's me who should be sorry" he interjected. His steely blue eyes were haunted as he looked at her. "I should have never volunteered to go."

They stared at one another in silence, memories of the afternoon coming back to them. The internal thrumming Alex felt at that moment caused her to lowered her eyes away, if only temporarily. Her head started to throb as it had earlier in the day, but she willed her focus to remain on the man beside her. "I know it may be hard to believe" she began, forcing herself to look him in the eyes again, "but I've never had a transfer like that before. I don't know why it happened, or even _how_ it happened. I've got to figure it out before everyone else..." She trailed off, afraid to even utter the words out of fear. 

Bucky turned so that he faced her now, his metal arm supporting his large frame against the railing. Alex heard the plates moving beneath his jacket, and her interest was piqued once again.

"I know what you fear," he uttered softly. "Believe me - if they accepted me, they won't get rid of you."

Alex chuffed softly. "I hope you're right about that."

Again, their eyes met, and Alexis finally began to feel her nerves ease. The throbbing, ever-present hum within her softened. She wondered if it was her body's response to being so close to someone whose memories and emotions she'd absorbed. It wasn't as if she was used to this, not to this degree, but it was something to consider.

"Can I ask you something?" Alex hesitated, ashamed of what she was about to inquire. "About earlier, I mean?"

Bucky straightened, the sound of his arm plates shifting once more. "Of course."

Rubbing her brow, willing her headache to subside, Alex exhaled. "What did it feel like...for you?"

"During the transfer?"

Alex nodded.

For a moment, Bucky considered his answer. "It was like I was free." His expression changed to that of embarrassment; as if he was guilty to admit it. "It was as if layers of hurt were leaving my body. Somehow. I don't know how. But...that's what I felt. It's the first time I ever felt like that, since..."

He grew quiet again, and Alex understood. She'd read enough of his awful story to know what he alluded to, and she was keen enough to know they weren't close enough yet to speak of it.

"So you felt pain _leaving _you, not entering you?" she asked. 

Bucky answered with a single nod.

"Hmm." Alex pushed away from the railing, her hands going to the pockets of her hoodie. "All I felt was pain entering me." She began to pace, thoughts consuming her. Could it be that she somehow _relieved _Bucky? That she hadn't hurt him after all? 

She felt a chill run down the middle of her back, though she was unsure if it was the evening air or the realization she was settling upon. If what he said was true, then maybe there was something to this, something _useful _in what happened. Subconsciously, Alex shivered at the thought. 

"Here, take this" Bucky said, coming up beside her.

Alex was caught off guard by the gesture. She watched as he placed his jacket around her shoulders with a smile, the heat from his body quickly warming her. It had the rich scent of leather mixed with what must have been his cologne. It was alluring, warm, comforting. "Thank you" she said, hugging the leather to her body. "Guess it is a little late, huh? I should probably turn in soon."

"I'll walk you back" Bucky offered with a smile. When he looked at her now, his eyes held that same gentle kindness they had earlier in the day, and it warmed Alex even further.

They remained quiet on the walk back to the compound. It wasn't a long walk, so they reached the entrance to the building long before Alex wanted. She still had so many questions, but she could feel the weariness of the day finally catching up to her. As much as she wanted to figure out the puzzle of her and Bucky's transfer, it would have to wait.

As she made her way up to the front entrance, Alex turned to see Bucky remained on the landing a few steps below. "You aren't coming?"

He facially shrugged. "I probably should, but.....I think I'm going to walk some more."

"You'll need this, then" she said, beginning to remove his jacket but stopped when he met her on the steps.

"Keep it for now" he told her. His hands went to her shoulders, giving her a comforting squeeze. "It looks good on you."

Alex felt heat rise into her cheeks. "Thank you....Again."

"Have a good night, Alexis."

"You too, Bucky."

He turned and left her on the step, walking away silently into the darkness beyond. Alex remained watching until he faded from view, then went inside with a mind full of questions and her heart feeling better than it had all day.  
  


* * *

  
When Bucky returned to his apartment during the early hours of the morning, he found Steve waiting for him. He was asleep on the floor, legs stretched out before him with his back braced against the wall. His arms were folded loosely over his chest, and his mouth was open ever-so-slightly.

Upon seeing him there, Bucky could only shake his head. He reached for his apartment keys, making sure to jingle them a little more loudly than usual. The movement woke Steve with a start.

"Bucky..." He stood in one swift movement. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Are you stalking me now, Steve?" He looked at his friend with a smirk, hoping Steve caught the humor in his voice.

"I was worried..."

"You’re _always _worried." Once unlocked, Bucky entered the apartment, leaving the door ajar so Steve would follow. He tossed the keys on a small table near his couch. "And I told you that you didn’t have to."

"I know, I _know_." Steve closed the door with a gentle kick of his foot. "But I also know you're still getting back to your old self. It may take more time than any of us are prepared for. T'Challa said--"

"--T'Challa said I was okay, and I'm going to trust that." With this, Bucky leaned against the back of the couch, one ankle crossing over the other. He studied the tight lines of his best friend's face, wishing he would hear him out.

Steve conceded, realizing he was being overbearing yet again. He uttered a soft laugh in embarrassment. "I'm sorry, Buck. You know how I get."

Bucky gave him an empathetic smile. Steve loved him, he knew this. There was no one in his life who fretted over his well being these days more than Steve did, but sometimes his best friend could turn into a mother hen. "I appreciate that. I always will. I just....I just needed to get out of here for a while."

Steve's expression turned playful. "For over six hours?"

"Sometimes it takes a while."

"Where's your jacket, then?”

"I lent it to Alexis." He watched Steve's brow furrow in confusion.

"_Alexis_?"

"I ran into her on the trail." Bucky crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged. "Seems as though she needed to get out of here as well."

What he didn't tell Steve in that moment was how happy he'd been to see her there. When he left his apartment, he'd done so in search of answers. He wanted to make sense of what had happened that afternoon, especially because he blamed himself for what happened. And then Alex appeared on the trail.

It wasn't just her presence that soothed him. Something inside him had jumped in his chest when he first laid eyes on her, _long _before she ever put her hands on him in the Practice Room. Maybe it was how gorgeous he found her: something he hadn't felt in years. Hell, _decades_. Maybe it was the way she told him she would never hurt him: something _no one _told him. Or maybe it was the way she looked in his jacket that made his chest ache with a feeling far too unfamiliar to him. 

And none of it could he tell Steve.....not yet, anyway.

"Well, it's no lie, Buck. You've always been a true gentlemen" Steve noted with sincerity.

"Just taking pointers from you, pal." He gave Steve a good-natured pat on the shoulder. "And thanks for coming by. I really do appreciate it."

After Steve left, Bucky felt truly exhausted for the first time that day. He plopped down on his couch with a sigh, his thoughts turning to Alexis. He hoped, by now, she was sleeping soundly. He checked his watch, realizing just how long he'd been out walking and thinking. No wonder Steve fretted like he did.

Sinking deeper into the couch cushions, Bucky closed his eyes. Once more, he felt the tightening in his chest when he pictured her athletic build, accented by curves in all the right places, her long black hair that had drawn his eyes down the middle of her slender back, the look in her eyes when she put her hands on him and called him _Barnes_. It'd been a while since he felt any kind of attraction to someone like this, and the unfamiliar sensations echoing through him left him fearful of what it might mean. The last time he felt this way was when he was a teenager. Back before......before everything. 

The thought alone prompted him to stand, moving swiftly through his small apartment to his bedroom. He opened the top drawer of his bedside table, fishing through the items he kept there to disguise the hidden compartment he made in the bottom of the drawer. Carefully, he lifted the piece of wood he'd added to reveal the space where he kept his notebook.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, he flipped through the pages of his reminders, memories, and other pieces of his past that came to him at random. Coming to a new page, he grabbed a pen and began to scribble a new note:

_Feelings of attraction. Seems new, but can't be. _  
_Memories of my teenage years, before the war._  
_I think I went on dates before. No real details though. _  
_Aching in my chest when thinking about a new girl.   
_ _Seems...familiar. Can't really know for sure. _

Bucky stared at his notes for a minute or so, making sure there weren't any spare memories left in his mind to jot down. Sadly, it was all he could come up with.

One thing was certain: he needed sleep. On top of his current level of exhaustion, any time he tried to dig through the murky waters of his fragmented mind, it often drained him. He'd have to explore these feelings further to see what was brewing inside him, if anything. But not today.

Carefully, he placed his notebook of memories back into its hiding spot, then closed the drawer. Without another thought, he lay back on his bed and closed his eyes, letting sleep finally take hold.  
  


* * *

  
Alex stood outside the door to Tony's office the next morning. She paced to and fro, wringing her hands nervously as she mentally reviewed all the points she wanted to make. She also made sure to dress down today. No heels, no putting up a front. Just her in her jeans and her ACDC t-shirt, her hair pulled up in a messy bun. No facades here. Just a girl from outside of Boston, wanting to show she _cared _about being here and being a part of this team. She would work on whatever she could to fix what needed fixed. All other opinions be damned. 

Plus, she had a plan.  
Kind of.  
Okay, sort of....but she needed to test it first.

She chewed on her lip and stared at Tony's door.

_You gotta go in at some point, Alex. Now or never. If he argues with you - hear him out, but stand your ground. You deserve to be here. And remember what Bucky told you. _

Swallowing any remaining apprehension, Alex lifted her hand to knock on the door --- and stopped when it opened.

"I was literally _just _wondering how long it would take you to finally knock." 

Tony's deadpan wisecrack didn't phase her. "I need to talk to you."

"And _I _need to talk to _you_." He waved her inside, motioning to a cushioned chair not far from the one he dropped in to. "I've been watching you since you showed up, by the way."

Alex noticed a transparent electronic panel hovering near the television, which Tony now clicked off. Apparently, everywhere around his office was being recorded by some kind of camera. "Oh, so you just left me out there to pace?"

"Mmm hmm."

Tony once again motioned for her to join him, so Alexis took her spot in the chair without further comment.

"_Hello Alexis. Could I interest you like a beverage?"_

Alex swiveled in her chair. Somewhere, off to her side and behind her, an accented voice was addressing her by name. She looked at Tony, who seemed neither alarmed nor entertained.

"It'd be polite if you introduced yourself first, Jarvis" he told the voice.

_"Oh yes, my apologies. Hello, Alexis. It is a pleasure to have you join the team. My name is JARVIS. Could I interest you in a beverage?" _

Alex blinked. "Uh....sure. Yes. Water would be fine."

"Get her a tequila" Tony added.

"_One tequila shot and one glass of water, coming right up."_

With a raised eyebrow, Alex met Tony's amused expression. "Isn't it a little early for alcohol? Even for you?"

"It's not _for _me," he argued, his winning smile appearing. "It's for _you_, and it seems you need it, considering how nervous you've been while pacing outside my door for an hour."

The pair examined one another, but Alex found no argument in the point he was making. She sat back in the chair, crossing her legs, just as the mechanical arm of Jarvis handed her one shot of tequila, and one glass of water. "Thank you, Jarvis."

"_You're most welcome."_

Tony waved for the mechanical arm to disappear into the wall once more, watching as Alex took the shot without even flinching. He rested his elbows on his knees, mildly impressed. "Another?"

"Maybe later."

"Then let's get to the heart of the matter here." He looked down at the floor and tried to find his words. "First off - I'm sorry for...." He waved his hands passively. "For my attitude at the end there, yesterday."

Alex was pleasantly surprised. "And.....?"

"And?" Tony frowned. "Nope. That's all I had. No _and_."

"_And" _Alex repeated, ignoring him, "for making me feel like an _ass _in front of the others."

Tony was starting to like Alex. Perhaps the tequila shot was a good icebreaker after all. He watched as the pretty features of her face hardened slightly, her shoulders squaring as she addressed him.

"Alright, fair enough. I'm sorry for making you look like an ass," Tony conceded.

"In front of the others" Alex added.

Tony bit his tongue. "_In front of the others_."

Alex sat back in her chair, feeling a sense of newfound pride. "See? Now was that so hard?"

Tony rolled his eyes, but only a little. "And what was it, did you say, you came here to talk to me about?"

"I came here to talk to you because I was afraid you'd kick me out." Alex didn't like admitting it, but it had been her one big fear. Everything else she had planned to tell Tony would be in defense of that fact, should he actually consider doing it. As it stood right then and there, it didn't appear it was even a consideration, much to her relief.

"For what happened with you and Barnes?" Hearing this nearly made Tony choke on a laugh. "It takes way more than a faulty emotional transfer to warrant an exit interview around these parts. You realize we have a Hulk, right? You know - giant green guy, piss poor attitude, likes to smash entire cities?"

Alex tried to keep a straight face. "I think I've heard of the Hulk, sure."

"And the guy you tried to transfer with and failed? Know what he's done?" Tony stared at her blankly. "He tried to _kill me_. So no, Alex, I think you're safe here."

"Good. Thank you." Inside, Alex breathed a sigh of relief. A weight lifted from her shoulders, but the pressure wasn't off yet. "I actually want to talk about what happened yesterday."

Tony opened his arms, as if welcoming her to the stage. "I'm all ears."

"How about another shot?"

Both of Tony's brows shot upwards. "Jaaaarrvvviiiss?"

"_Coming, Sir. Be right with you."_

"Make it two this time, wouldya?" He met Alex's gaze and smiled.

Soon enough, two shots of tequila were handed over and together, they raised their glasses and downed the liquid. Apparently, it was always 5 o'clock in Avengers Headquarters, and Alex approved.

"Alright, hear me out." She placed the shot glass upside down on the table in front of her, then leveled her gaze with Tony's. "I don't think the transfer yesterday was faulty. In fact, I think I just discovered a new trait of my........_gift_. I ran into Bucky last night when I was out taking a walk, and I asked him what he felt when I placed my hands on him. He told me it felt like layers of past hurt were leaving him."

Tony sat forward, clearly intrigued. "Go on."

Encouraged by his interest, Alex continued. "For _me_, though - the whole thing felt like an onslaught of horrible pain, horrible memories, all of it just throttling my own emotions."

"Sounds like Barnes to me."

Alex swallowed the defensive remark that rose in her throat. "What it sounds like is: I may be able to help Bucky. Or anyone, really, if I can remove their hurt for them."

Tony immediately shook his head. "No way. You're forgetting that I _saw _what it did to you yesterday. You both went flying across the room in a clash of light that nearly blinded the rest of us."

"Right, but....Okay, obviously, I'll need to work on that part." Suddenly, Alex felt like she was losing his support. She exhaled heavily. "Look, Tony: I know yesterday looked bad. It's not the first time my power looked awful, and it won't be the last. My whole life, all I ever wanted was to try and turn the curse that is my sense of touch into something that could actually help people. Usually, that involved me transferring from the bad guys and turning it in the favor of the good guys." She stood up now, putting herself in front of Tony. "What if -- just what if -- I could take from one of the good guys, and make him better than before?"

Tony stared at her, his eyes giving away the wrestling match that was taking place inside him. Alex waited, wondering what was holding him back from saying something. Her patience paid off. Tony stood and met her eye-to-eye...and he smiled.

"You may be on to something, Markos."

"_It sounds like a splendid idea to me, if I do say so myself--"_

"Can it, Jarvis!" Tony yelled over his shoulder.

Alex covered her mouth, muffling a giggle.

"My only question," Tony told her, his gaze narrowing. "is how you're gonna make that happen."

"I have a plan for that too, although I can't be totally sure if it will work just yet." She hesitated, searching Tony's eyes for reassurance that wasn't there. Only questions lived in that gaze now; the gaze of a genius-level problem solver. And _he_was asking _her _how she planned to make it happen. 

"Let's have it then. What's your plan?"

"Keep in mind that I've never encountered what I encountered yesterday, but I'll need to try my theory out on someone." She paused for emphasis. "Someone _willing_."

Tony glanced around the office. "Who, me?"

"Only if you're willing." She gave a casual shrug. "I'd need to try and extract emotions and memories from you, similar to how it happened with Bucky."

"Why not just try it again with Barnes?"

"There's a lot there to unpack." Alex averted her gaze. "If yesterday was any indication, I'm not sure I'm strong enough to handle that level of....darkness....just yet."

Tony took a step forward into Alex's personal space, forcing her eyes to meet his. "I hate to be the one to break it to you, but we've all got a lot of darkness in us. Take any one of those in the room yesterday. Take _me_. It's all the same." 

The change in Tony's entire demeanor left Alex unnerved. The way his eyes darkened, the way his voice took on a hushed tone. She'd yet to see this side of Tony, and the change was alarming.

"We've _all _got darkness" he reiterated, jaw tightening. "Every single one of us. You aren't the only one, and Barnes isn't either. Demons? I've got 'em. You want a haunted past? Ask Rogers about that. How ‘bout a tainted past? Ask Wanda. Ask any of them. They'll tell you."

Alex looked Tony in the eyes. "So who will it be then?" Her voice barely rose above a whisper. "Who is willing to expose those demons at the chance of bettering themselves?"

Tony's expression hardened. "Better start asking around, because it ain't me."

++++++++


	3. Chapter 3

Alex wandered the hallways of the Avengers compound after her meeting with Tony. Her emotions were humming again with an energy that flowed in her veins, making her antsy. She needed a distraction, so she took to the hallways in hopes of familiarizing herself with the building. It was high time she figured out where everything was in this place. 

The building itself was larger than she ever expected, and she lost herself several times going from the west wing into the east wing and back again. This was good, as it forced her to find her way around. After an hour of trying to memorize the overwhelming layout, she ended up back at the Practice Room. 

Upon passing the large metal doors of the entrance, Alex paused. Craning an ear towards the door, she thought she detected muted sounds coming from within. The only people allowed in the arena were Avengers, so whoever it was, Alex knew. 

_This could be interesting_ , she thought. With a wave of her key card, the security panel blinked and the sealed doors _whooshed _open to reveal three figures at the far end of the arena. When she saw the glint of a metal arm, she knew Bucky was one of the three. The other could only be Steve; his blonde hair distinct next to that of Bucky's. The third, judging by the bow strapped to his back, could only be Clint. 

Alex approached quietly, keeping to the edge of the arena as she studied Bucky and Steve. They parried with one another in movements so fluid they could have been choreographed. Their angled punches and sharp dodges were accented by breathless grunts. Steve was shirtless, much to Alex's visual pleasure, while Bucky wore a white t-shirt and loose gray pants. Each of the men had a look of intensity on their faces, highlighted by a light sheen of sweat on their brows. 

And while the sight of a shirtless Captain America was a sight to behold, Alex found herself transfixed by Bucky. With most of his metal arm exposed, she couldn't help but stare at it. It was a modern marvel to be sure. She watched the way it moved with him...shifting plate by plate, adjusting to his position, moving with each parry. If his metal arm was heavier than his flesh arm, he never let it show. The agility he possessed was remarkable. 

The dance came to an end when Steve caught Bucky in an head/arm lock. It was a particular martial arts technique Alex recognized, and one she had never seen performed so flawlessly. Soon after, Steve must have uttered something funny because Bucky broke out in laughter. His entire face scrunched up happily, and the sound of his laugh alone was like a light breaking through a dark room. It was youthful and full of joy, transforming him in ways that made him even more handsome than before. Hearing it made Alex smile subconsciously. 

The men exchanged a handshake and their laughter settled, each trying to catch their breath as they walked it off. Alex decided now was a good time to emerge, and announced herself by giving a round of applause. The sound of clapping drew all three of their attentions. 

When Bucky saw it was Alex who approached, he quickly wiped back the sweaty hairs from his face. "Hiya, Alex." 

"Long time no see" she said, feeling a slight uptick in her level of nervousness. "By the way, amazing _Kata-ha-jima,_Rogers." 

Impressed by her knowledge, Steve smiled through exhales. "Seems you know you martial arts?" His hands went to his hips as he caught his breath. 

"I've practiced a little on my own" Alex replied casually. "I didn't mean to interrupt, of course" she added, making eye-contact with Bucky. "But I'm glad I did." 

Both Clint and Steve glanced from Alex to Bucky, surprised by the pointed comment. Bucky merely smiled and tucked a piece of his sweaty hair behind his ear. 

"Do you boys mind if I steal him for a moment?" 

The three of them looked at one another. 

"Not at all," Steve said, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. "Just give him back when you're done. We still have work to do." 

Clint made a face. "Yeah, I haven't taken my turn yet. Word is I'm getting rusty." 

"You are" Bucky quipped as he joined Alex. They turned away, leaving Steve and Clint behind as they began to walk. 

Alex waited until they were out of ear shot before speaking. "I talked to Tony this morning." 

Bucky met her gaze. "How'd that go?" 

"Better than expected, but with a shitty ending." She made sure not to mention anything specific until they were well away from the others. When they reached the opposite end of the arena, Alex stood flush against the wall to keep Clint and Steve in her line of sight. She motioned for Bucky to lean in closer. "This stays between us, okay?" 

Bracing his metal hand against the wall behind her, Bucky leaned in, creating a box of privacy between her and his large frame. In doing so, Alex once again caught the faintest scent of cologne radiating off him. It was the same earthy musk that had enveloped her when he'd given her his jacket. _That, _combined with the sweaty white shirt he wore and the glow he had from his workout, was enough to make her knees weak. 

"Is everything okay?" he asked. The ocean hues of his eyes deepened, giving away his concern. "Tony didn't-" 

"No, no. Everything's fine." Alex found breathing suddenly difficult. The intensity of Bucky's focus on her and the layer of care in his voice warmed something deep within her core, rattling her. "It just has to do with the other day, and I don't really need the others hearing about this just yet." 

"Did you find some answers since we last talked?" 

"Maybe." Fear caused her to hesitate. "...I was wondering if I could try the transfer with you again. Alone." 

The notion made Bucky stand to his full height. "Are you sure that's a good idea?" 

"I have to see if I can control what I take from you." Alex began to worry once more that she would lose her chance with him like she lost Tony. "If I can control this...this bond between us...then maybe I can help you. Maybe we can work together in our down time, and I can help remove some of the pain you still have in there." She tapped a finger to his chest, right next to his heart. 

Bucky stomach tightened at her touch. Even just the simplest of caresses made everything inside him yearn for more. He closed his eyes, fighting the urge to push the sensation away out of fear. 

"You don't have to if you don't want to" Alex quickly uttered. "I told Tony the same, and he very easily rejected the offer." 

"He rejected it?" Bucky stared at her, his anger for Tony brewing. "Why?" 

"Tony does what he wants" Alex answered simply. "And he didn't want to help, so...I'm going back to the source." 

Bucky rubbed the bridge of his nose. Tony was arguably the most experimental one in their group. For all that he hated about Tony, he knew enough about the man to respect his willingness to test something out when others wouldn't. If he had to guess, Tony shied away from Alex's proposition for a personal reason. He'd seen instances before where personal stake became the man's crutch. He'd bet money Tony was avoiding it. 

"You don't have to decide right now," Alex said, realizing the pressure she was likely putting on him. She wanted to give him some time to mull it over. He deserved that much. "I don't even know if it will work, but I _have _to try. And I'll ask every single person in this building until I find someone who's willing to make themselves vulnerable enough to do it." 

Bucky's mouth curved into a smile. "Are you always this determined?" His question was greeted by a newfound light in Alex's eyes. 

"Only when I want something bad enough." 

Her tone suggested something much more than simply finding answers to her questions. Bucky exhaled a tiny bit of air, unable to hold back the grin that was plastered across his face. 

"Are you flirting with me, Miss Markos?" 

"Are you flirting with _me_, Mr. Here - Take My Jacket?!" 

Bucky laughed. "I'll have you know, I don't give my jacket to just any ol' dame." 

"_Dame_?" A chuckle caught in Alex's throat. "Oh my god, you _are _old." 

A piercing whistle from the opposite end of the arena cut through their laughter. 

"IF YOU TWO ARE FINISHED..." 

It was Clint's voice echoing off the room's walls. Bucky and Alex met each other's gaze and withheld their remaining laughter. 

"Think about my offer" she said, stepping towards the exit. "But don't keep me waiting." 

Bucky watched after her, his smile never faltering. He turned to see Steve and Clint making their way towards him, Clint continuing to whistle at a piercing volume. 

"Alright, alright! I'm done!" Bucky shouted, jogging to meet them. Even as he returned to the taunts of both Steve and Clint, he never once stop smiling. 

* * *

Later that afternoon, Alexis stood in her apartment staring at the items sprawled across her bed. She didn't pack much when Nick Fury invited her to join the Avengers, but she did manage to scrounge up what she deemed essential. Now, she was finally getting around to finding places to put the stuff in her new place. 

She went about hanging all the clothes that had been in her bag, then organized the bathroom with her toiletry items. She used her phone to play music, noting that she'd need to buy herself a bluetooth speaker somewhere before too long. She couldn't exist without music in her life, and the volume on her cell wasn't cutting it. 

After finishing with the bathroom, Alex turned to organizing her desk space. She set up her laptop and some charging cords, organized what few files she had, and then brought out the only picture she brought with her. It was of her and her sister, taken several summers ago at the Cape. The sun was shining against their olive-toned skin; an extra shade darker from a summer spent in the sun. The ocean behind them was caught in motion, reflecting the most brilliant pillars of light. Alex could almost smell the salt in the air. 

Any other normal pair of siblings would have been pictured hugging one another in such a photo. But Alex and her sister stood side by side, avoiding all manners of touch, with at least a foot of distance between them. 

Alex stared down at the photo sadly. She traced the line of her sister's smile with her finger, slipping back into the memory of that day. The sound of knocking pulled her from that memory. Alex placed the frame back on the table, giving it one last glance before heading to the door. 

When she opened it, she was greeted by none other than Natasha Romanoff. "Nat?" 

"Hey!" Her tone was cheerful but cautious. She glanced past Alex momentarily. "Are you busy?" 

"Not busy at all. Come in." Alex motioned her inside, pleasantly surprised by the unexpected drop-in. "What brings you by?" 

Nat's eyes swept across the room. "Just wanted to see how you were adjusting." Her smile was genuine, but she kept her hands firmly clasped in front of her. "How's everything going?" 

Plopping onto the edge of her bed, now free of random personal belongings, Alex let out a weary sigh. "Fine, for the most part. _Complicated_, but fine." 

"I suppose that's as much as anyone can ask." Nat took a seat next to Alex on the bed, her wily smirk appearing. "Considering what you just walked in to and all." 

Alex gave her an appreciative smile. "Thanks for being one of the kinder ones since I got here. You're the first person to officially visit me." 

"Who's been unkind?" Nat demanded, her face screwing up angrily. "I'll knock 'em out." 

Alex didn't doubt it. "Alright, rephrase: no one's really been _un_ -kind...It's just...Tony's been a little-" 

"Overbearing? Egotistical? Short-tempered?" Nat waved her hand. "Just Tony Stark being Tony Stark. He means well. He really does. And he'll go to bat for you in a heartbeat. Any attempt at getting him to be patient, though?" She rolled her eyes. "Forget it." 

"I'll take your advice to heart" Alex said with sincerity. 

"Besides..." With this, Nat stood and looked around. "We need to start dressing this place up. Please tell me you weren't planning on keeping it as bland as it is now?" 

"Oh hell no." Alex shook her head. "In fact, I was just wondering where I should go to buy shit around here." 

"Oooo." Nat sized her up with interest. "Whatchya got in mind?" 

"A stereo of some sort, first and foremost." 

"Ahhhh, music. Nice. We can secure one of those easy" Nat said, nodding steadily. 

"And is Amazon a thing here?" She watched as Nat fought back a smirk. "Let me rephrase: does Amazon deliver to the Avengers Headquarters? Or do I have to get a secret PO box or something and keep everything on the low?" 

Despite Alex being completely serious, neither of the women could keep a straight face. They exchanged a good laugh over it, and Natasha was just about to answer both of those questions when a rapid pounding against the door shocked them to silence. 

"_Markos!? You in there?_" 

Recognizing it was Steve, Natasha was the first to head for the door. She flung it open, concern slipping into her tone. "What's wrong?" 

Steve glanced from Nat to Alex. "A mission's come up. Briefing starts in 15 minutes." 

"I'm on it." Nat pushed past him without further question. 

Steve's intense gaze now fell to Alex. "Follow me. I'll show you where the Briefing Room is." 

"You're saying this mission includes me?" She wanted to make absolutely sure she wasn't misreading him. 

Steve gave a short but firm nod. 

Every inch of Alex's body ignited. "Lead the way then, Cap." 

* * *

A few Avengers were already in the Briefing Room when Alex arrived. She joined them around a circular table where a holographic display hovered in midair. Three-dimensional profiles of men Alex had never seen before were suspended above her. She sized up the men with a scowl. Whoever they were, they were in for a world of hurt if she had anything to do with it. 

A few other members of the team arrived, assembling around the table silently. Alex noticed not all were present; only Natasha, Steve, Bucky, Sam, and Clint were in attendance. As a whole, the group was pretty focused. Bucky glanced her way for a brief moment before giving his full attention to the profiles on display. They waited a few more minutes, and only when Tony arrived did they begin. 

Steve took a standing position at the head of the table and faced the group. "Alright let's get started." He tapped a button on a control panel, changing the holographic image to that of a small tropical island. "Our mission is simple: isolation and extraction. Our location: the island of Comoros, northwest of Madagascar. Political unrest has led to a growing rebel group that is now threatening to use biological weaponry. Hydra is suspected to be financially supporting their efforts, with a longer-term goal in mind." 

The holographic image transformed again, showing a two story structure. Alex studied it as Steve continued. 

"Our target: a makeshift weapons bunker beneath an abandoned warehouse." He flipped the screen to show their planned entry point. "It's currently disguised as an agriculture storage facility, but S.H.I.E.L.D has uncovered this to be rebel group's number one factory, and could house the details to their biological weapon threats _and _Hydra's involvement." 

Tony stepped up to the table and switched the screen back to the men who had been hovering there earlier. "These are the assholes running this so-called operation." He reorganized the panels so they were in a straight line, pointing at each as he talked. "Their names aren't important, but their faces are. Memorize them. If you run into them: take them out. If you run into any of their cronies: take _them _out. Civilian casualties should be limited, since the warehouse is back a ways off the main drag." 

"We get in and we get out" Steve added, thumbs hooking in the buckle of his belt. He looked each one of them in the eye, settling on Alex last. "This will be your first mission, Markos. You ready?" 

"Absolutely." Alex felt calmer than she had since she arrived. "Just tell me where you want me." 

"The plan is to have you mirror Romanoff to start." Steve's eyes met Natasha's. "We need stealth for this one, which is why this particular group was chosen for the mission. Sneak in, get what we need, take out who we can, and get the hell out. No big blasts. No smashes. No fanfare. Got it?" 

The group nodded in unison. Alex felt her nerve endings firing in succession, her powers roaring to life at the prospect of the mission ahead. She was finally about to do what she came here to do, what she was _recruited _to do, and she wouldn't let them down. 

"Suit up" Steve told them, then flicked the screen off. "Meet in the hangar at 1900 hours." 

The group split up. Alex trailed behind the others as they began filing out the door, but Tony stopped her. He motioned her back to the table with a finger. 

"Got something for ya before you go" he told her, leading her down a hallway to a small side office. "Been working on this in the background before you got here, but sped things up a notch when I heard S.H.I.E.L.D discussing a pending mission." 

Alex watched as he pressed his thumb to a bright green panel, scanning his fingerprint before unlocking whatever was behind the door to the office. A metal door slid upwards, and that's when Alex realized it wasn't an office at all. It was a display closet. 

With a brand new suit inside. 

"_Tony_..." Alex took a step forward, gazing in awe at the outfit. "Is this...?" 

"A fully capable, state of the art, technological marvel of a suit with a design straight from Wakanda?" Tony crossed his arms proudly. "You guessed it. And it's all yours." 

Alex stared at the suit, unsure of what to even say. The design was beautiful: black from head to toe with subtle, dark purple piping accents along the arms and down the sides of the legs. It was made of some sort of shiny, malleable material that was sure to conform perfectly to her every move. She recognized the material as being distinctly Wakandan, which left her baffled to no end that she finally _had _something like this. Both forearms of the suit were outfitted with streamlined vambraces, complete with telecommunication ability and a range of advanced computer functions. Several weapon holsters were attached to the legs, while sleek black combat boots rounded out the footwear. 

"Check this out." Tony pressed a button on one of the suit's wrist panels and the gloves disappeared. "The hands of the suit are gloved, but we had it made so that they're retractable on-demand. Just press this button and boom: gloves off. Designed to help you with quick transfers when you need it." 

Disbelief transformed Alex's face. She looked at Tony, unable to find the words to adequately thank him. She noticed the smirk he wore wasn't full of arrogance either, but was completely and utterly genuine. His eyes danced, seeming to realize how important of a moment this was for her. 

"Tony, how do I even begin to thank-" 

"-You don't." His smile flattened and his face turned serious. "You use it, and you kick some _ass_in it." 

Alex felt the sting of water in her eyes, but she blinked it quickly away. "You can bet I will." 

"Good." Tony stepped past her. "Now suit up before Rogers leaves you behind." 

He left her there, heading back down the hallway without another word. Alex stood in pure shock, staring up at the display case. Too excited to wait any longer, she grabbed the suit and all its accessories and began to don them one by one. 

* * *

The Avenger's Quinjet engines were already fired by the time Alex and the others met in the hangar. The lingering awe she had from receiving the suit continued as she boarded, her eyes unable to take in all the technological detail that the aircraft boasted in one go. 

Steve and Nat were deep in discussion near the cockpit, so Alex slipped past and entered the ship's rear seating area. The walls were lined with several seats, some of which had retractable computers accessible near them. A separate avionics computer bay was positioned directly behind the main cockpit, the chair currently occupied by Sam. 

He glanced up as Alex passed, an eyebrow sharply rising. "Daaaamn, Markos. Nice threads!" 

This caused the others to pause and look her direction. Alex beamed with pride, but with a great deal of humble gratitude as well. "Call it a First Mission gift from Tony." 

"Straight outta Wakanda, too" Sam added, rubbing his chin. "Not bad, not baaadd." 

Alex smiled, feeling more and more like she was truly part of this team. She made her way back to one of the open seats next to Bucky, who was already strapped in and ready for takeoff. For the first time, Alex got a look at his uniform: it was dark as night, made of almost all Kevlar, and had a much more complicated design than her own. Compartments dotted most of the suit, functioning as storage for guns, knives, grenades, you name it. The left sleeve was removed, allowing his metal arm to have free range of motion. No longer did Bucky appear the flirty, happy man Alex saw that morning, but rather a menacing, cunning assassin. Only his blue eyes burned bright within the dark interior of the aircraft, following her as she neared. 

"Bucky." 

"Alexis." 

He took in the sight of her in her new suit with hushed awe. Every delicate curve Alex had was accented by the suit, like black liquid covering her from neck to toe. Not an inch was left to the imagination. Her long black hair was pulled over one shoulder, though she drew it up into a ponytail before sitting down next to him. Her movements were graceful, as though she'd had the suit her whole life, but her appearance was nothing short of lethal. 

"You look really good" he told her, watching as she locked the safety straps across her chest. 

"Yeah?" 

"Yeah...Amazing, actually." 

"Is the suit that good?" She watched his mouth twitch, positive he was fighting back a smile. 

"Has nothing to do with the suit" he uttered, low enough so that only Alex heard but powerful enough to melt her insides. Her eyes met his, and a moment of shared understanding passed between them. Something was there, hiding beneath the surface but glowing hotter each time they saw one another. Alex didn't dare think about it, and definitely not before her first mission. 

Tony boarded the aircraft last, dressed down in what might be considered 'casual' for him. He took stock of everyone on board, giving each of the present Avengers a nod before joining Steve in the cockpit. Natasha, Clint, and Sam joined Alex and Bucky in the chairs. 

"We'll make the transfer before we land" Nat mentioned, sliding into the seat next to Alex. "Can you do it in under 5 minutes?" 

"Way faster than that" Alex answered. "Since we already made a connection the other day, it should only take a few seconds." 

Nat seemed pleasantly pleased. "Great!" She settled back into her chair and looked at the others with delight. "Let's get this party on the road, shall we?" 

At the helm of the aircraft, Steve and Tony manned the controls and fired all remaining engines to life. Beyond the cockpit window, Alex watched as the hangar doors opened to the evening beyond. The sky was clear, with just a hint of sunset color beginning to show. 

Beyond those doors, Alex's future awaited. And for the first time ever, she couldn't wait to meet it head on. 


	4. Chapter 4

The Avengers arrived at Comoros Island in the dead of night. The Quinjet descended to just above the tropical landscape, its presence now completely disguised by a cloaking device. Only the swaying tops of the palm trees indicated an aircraft had even passed. Tony piloted them in, getting the group to their drop-in point.

The members on board readied themselves. Weapons were passed out in silence. When they were ready, they got into position near the hatch for when Tony gave the word.

Alex stood behind Nat, and when the redhead gave her the signal, Alex began the transfer. She placed her hand on Natasha's shoulder and closed her eyes. Her body immediately adjusted to the intake of Nat's skills, her muscular responses, and her physical composition. Outwardly, Alex always looked the same, but internally she was a perfect mirror of Natasha and her decades of assassin training. The same faint light shimmered around her as she made the transfer, and in a matter of seconds it was complete. She removed her hand and gave Nat a nod.

"Everything good?" Nat asked.

Alex cracked her neck and straightened her shoulders. "Better than ever."

"T-minus 2 minutes!" Tony called back.

Steve checked in with the group, making sure that everyone's comm units were synced and on the same channel. Alex adjusted the earpiece she wore and linked her comms to that of Steve and the others. Once they were on the ground, it was go-time, so all adjustments had to be made before they got to work.

Tony lowered the craft down into a small clearing not far from the warehouse. The hatch powered open and Steve lead the group into the thicket of jungle-like forest that would bring them right to their target. Once all were on the ground, Steve radioed back to Tony and the hatch closed. The plan was to have Tony hover out of sight and well above the ground, monitoring the situation in case there was a need for Iron Man to step in.

Alexis felt the wind of the Quinjet engines tousle her hair, which was the only indication Tony had left them. Once the winds calmed, it was as if a deathly silence fell over them.

With a nod of his chin, Steve signaled the others to proceed behind him. Alex crouched and moved through tall palm fronds with hardly a sound. When the lights of the warehouse began to trickle through the forest, the Avengers split up into three separate groups: Steve would go first, clearing the way for the others to follow, then assist Nat and Alex once they were inside. Bucky, Sam, and Clint would handle any outside guards, then try and find the profiled men running the operation. Alex and Nat would penetrate the warehouse, locate the heart of the operation, extract data from the computer system, and take out any members who might be working inside the lab. Once complete, Steve would lead them out again and regather the group in time for Tony to pick them up.

When they reached the edge of the tree line, Steve unhooked his shield from his back and ran out of the forest. Alex couldn't see what was happening, but waited in silence with the others. Soon enough, the _plink-plink-zing _of Steve's shield could be heard.

_So it begins_ , Alex thought with a smirk. She closed her eyes in those final moments and focused on everything her body was telling her. Her insides were humming, like a fire roaring to life that had been a dull ember for too long. Her muscles wanted movement; everything inside her _craved _it.

Finally, the time came.

_"Outside's clear,"_ came Steve's voice. _"Move in." _

It was all the notice they needed. Alex and Nat took off at a sprint towards the side entrance of the building, while Bucky, Sam, and Clint went around to the front. The shadowy figure of Steve could be sensed in the distance, his movement followed by the grunts of men being taken out one by one. At one point, his shield zipped past Alex so close, she ducked and felt the breeze of it against her face.

_I really need to get used to that thing_ , she thought.

Nat entered the building first with Alex close on her heels. Right away, the women encountered three men who were completely unaware that anything was happening to them or their building. Nat took out one of them while Alex made quick work of the other two.

As the second man went down, Alex held him by the collar and stared into his eyes. She retracted the gloves on her suit, placed her splayed palm over his face and closed her eyes. She scanned his thoughts as they flashed through her mind:

_ Who are these people?_  
_ Oh shit. Fuck._  
_ The MIXTURE. It's compromised!_  
_ Downstairs...Gotta warn them...  
_ _WHAT IS SHE DOING TO ME?_

The man screamed.

Two seconds worth of transfer gave everything Alex needed, and she dropped the unconscious man without another look. "Biohazards are downstairs" she told Nat as they reconvened.

_"Weapons contained on bottom level"_ Nat radioed to the group. _"We're heading there now."_

_"Right behind you_ " radioed Steve.

Two additional men met the women at the stairway, their guns cocked and aimed, but they never got that far. Natasha took them both out in the blink of an eye. Once more, Alex knelt next to the conscious man and placed her open palm on his face. The man tried to bite her hand but she knuckled one of his pressure points to subdue him. He also screamed when she infiltrated his mind, but fell silent once she was finished with him.

"A whole group of them are down there" Alex warned, referring to what she'd gathered from the man.

Nat gave a nod. "Split up once we get to the bottom."

They moved through the stairwell quietly, waiting for others to try and sneak up on them, but none came. When they reached the bottom and flung open the door, they saw almost a dozen workers in lab coats, many of which had been recently outfitted with Kevlar vests.

_Nice try_ , Alex thought, round-housing one of them in the face. _Too bad we don't need bullets to end your sorry existence. _

She parried with two more, knocking the guns out of their hands and using them to smash them in the faces. They fell back in a spray of blood, their bodies slumping to the floor. She had only a moment before the next one came to attack her, but Alex thought she spotted the main control center of the lab. It was across the wide berth of the room, across metal tables full of glass laboratory gear that separated her from Natasha.

"Nat!" Alex called, blocking and dodging punches being delivered at her. She went low and swept her leg out, toppling the man the floor and kicking him in the face. "The control panel's on your side! I'll cover you!"

Natasha jumped onto the tables and used her batons to disengage two more men. "I'm on it!"

The sound of Nat's boots pounding against metal thundered in the open space as she leapt from table to table toward the computer systems. Alex continued to cover her, slowly clearing men out of the way in any fashion possible. She threw the heavy metal lab tables up and broke glass all over a few, pinning them to the floor by the weight of the table. She grabbed a larger piece of broken glass and slashed at another, sending him to the floor as he choked on his blood.

Before the spark of his life flickered out, Alex knelt beside him and retracted her gloves. He stared up at her in fear, his breathing garbled by oozing blood. She pressed her thumb against his forehead and closed her eyes.

_ I don't want to die._  
_ Oh God, oh God._  
_ Get this crazy bitch away from me._  
_ I hope Benji and the crew got the mayday._  
_ They've gotta come or the whole thing's fucked._  
_ I'm so cold.  
_ _I don't want to die..._

Alex stood, and the man slumped over lifelessly. The man's thoughts repeated over and over in her head:

_ I hope Benji and the crew got the mayday._  
_ I hope Benji and the crew got the mayday.  
_ _...mayday..._

"Fuck" Alex uttered, just as two more men threw themselves at her. One of them even dared to shoot at her, but Steve had joined the party by then. Alex slid behind one of the toppled tables, dodging the bullets just as Steve's shield rang off the walls. It knocked the gun out of the man's arms, knocked the man onto the floor, then returned to Steve just as he extended his hand to her.

"Nice work in here" he said, lifting Alex to her feet.

"Thanks, but I don't think we're in the clear yet." She wiped blood off her face with the back of her gloved hand. "Reinforcements might be on their way."

Steve's blue eyes centered on her. "How do you know?"

"Stole the thoughts of that one." She angled her chin in the direction of the now-deceased man on the floor. "I think he made a mayday call."

"Damn." Steve turned, scaling the room for any sign of Natasha. He put a finger to his earpiece and caught his breath while he could. _"Nat - you copy?"_

_"A little busy over here" _ came her voice. _ "There's too many computers. I could use another body if you got one to spare." _

Steve was about to tell Alex to join her, but another voice came across the radio. This time, the voice belonged to Bucky.

_"Outside's compromised. We need backup STAT."_

Fear rose from Alex's stomach to her throat.

_"What direction? How many?" _ Steve radioed back.

_"Too many. They're coming out of the woodworks," _ Bucky continued. A few seconds passed - likely him removing another of their enemy - before he was heard again. _ "Barton's working the perimeter, but we need boots on the ground at the front entrance." _

Another few seconds passed, and Alex and Steve's gazes met.

"I'm going" Alex told him. She moved past, but Steve's hand reached out to grab her.

"Wait, Markos-"

Alex hesitated, trying to read the tense lines of Steve's mouth but failed. His eyes studied hers for a moment, then let her arm go.

"Drop in on them from the roof."

Recognition dawned on her face. "Element of surprise. Got it."

"Radio the _minute _you need me."

"I will."

Thankful for his trust, Alex took off as fast as she could for the stairwell. She climbed them two at a time, racing past the first level and on up to the rooftop. When she got there, she realized a security panel locked the metal doors. She pulled a switchblade out of one of her pockets and picked it open. The backside revealed the inner wiring of the mechanism, which Alex cut through in one swipe. A few sparks sputtered from the panel, and then the door slid right open.

_Easy peasy, _ she thought with a satisfied grin.

Careful not to make her presence known, Alex kept to the edge of the roof. She remained in the shadows, her dark suit and hair blending into the background flawlessly. As she crept along, she could hear voices down below, but couldn't tell one from the other. She needed to get to a point where she could see them but they couldn't see her, and she needed to do it fast. If she was going to drop in on them by surprise, time was running out.

Rounding the corner near one of the chimney pipes, Alex saw an area that might give her a view of what was going on below. She crawled over to the spot, pressed her back against the cement ledge, then peered over. Bucky and Sam were the only two she recognized. They were still engaged with the enemy, doing their damndest to hold off those who were coming from somewhere east of the building. Two others were gagged and tied to a tree nearby, struggling to move but failing miserably.

What brought a chill to Alex's blood were the lights she saw off in the distance. Three sets of headlights bounded along the road leading up to the facility. They were still a few miles out, but were very clearly heading their direction. Apparently, they got the mayday call after all.

Alex leaned back against the ledge and pressed the button on her earpiece. _"Rodgers, come in."_

"_Whatchya got, Markos?"_

"_Three vehicles approaching. Probably their call for backup." _Alex glanced back again, the headlights slowly nearing.

"_Get on the ground and stall. We're almost done."_

Alex wasted no time. She crawled the rest of the distance to the fire escape, disengaged her the grappling hook onto the metal frame, then dropped the remaining distance to the ground. She aimed herself right behind one of the men Bucky was fighting. The surprise of her entry was enough to cause the opponent to falter, wasting precious seconds that cost him his life. The second Alex hit the ground, she elbowed him in the face. As he staggered backwards, Bucky grabbed his head and snapped his neck.

"What are you doing!?" His eyes were ablaze with heat from the fight. Another of the enemy came up behind him with a wire as if to choke him, but Bucky blocked the attempt without flinching. "Get somewhere safe!" he called, twisting the man's arm and tackling him to the ground.

Alex ran over just as two more men approached. "Not an option!" she yelled, round-housing one of them and slashing at his chest with her knife. Bucky followed her lead and kicked the other square in the chest, sending him flying into the trunk of a tree.

He caught his breath for only a moment, and used it to shake his head in disbelief at her. "Are you always this stubborn?!"

The corner of Alex's mouth lifted into a smirk. "You already know the answer to that, Barnes."

Their chatter didn't last long. Sam soared above them, his falcon wings fully extended. "INCOMING" he shouted as he flew past. He bought them time, taking out several of them as he landed and spun, his metal wings slicing through the group.

Alex and Bucky got to work. They ran up behind Sam and fought the men he missed. Alex went toe-to-toe with her adapted fighting skills while Bucky took out the others with aimed precision, the _pop-pop-pop _of his gun finishing the job. They worked in unison, a pair perfectly matched in ways of fighting that neither even had time to notice.

When Alex took down one of the last in her vicinity, she turned in time to witness Bucky toppling to the ground with one of the assailants. They wrestled, throwing punches and trying to best the other in any way they could. That's when Alex noticed the opponent's face: it matched that of the lead target of the operation.

And then Alex saw him bring out an electric shock rod.

Fear exploded inside her as she watched the man jab the rod into Bucky's metal arm. He screamed, the sound of his pain splitting her insides.

In that moment, something let loose inside Alex. Her powers erupted, rage boiling in her veins and shattering through her body. Every muscle fiber came alive, and she felt herself nearing that teetering ledge she'd spent years trying to avoid. The sound of Bucky's pain was all it took, and Alex no longer cared if she jumped off that ledge or not.

The assailant never saw what awaited him when Alex tackled him. Her movements were otherworldly, her fighting unmatched. No matter what the man tried to deliver, Alex returned tenfold. She head butted him, grabbed the electric prod and cracked him across the face with it, then stood over him as he fell to the ground.

Twirling the prod proudly, Alex knelt over the man's chest and pinned his neck to the ground with the weapon. She watched him for a moment as his eyed widened in fear.

"Don't! Don't use it!" he cried, fear blooming in voice. "I'll tell you anything you want! Just don't kill me!"

Alex chuckled. "Oh don't worry, you don't have to tell me anything." She retracted her gloves and smiled. "I'll take it from here."

She placed her palm over the man's face and began.

* * *

Bucky struggled to get to his knees, his arm continuing to convulse from the leftover shock. He rolled onto his stomach and used his flesh arm to brace himself up.

_Where is she? _

He looked around frantically, trying his best to get up so he could spot Alex.

_Where is she...where is she..._

Bruised and winded, he forced himself to his feet, holding on to his weakened left side as he stumbled. Finally he saw them: the pair rolled into the faint yellow glow from one of the building's lights. They fought exhaustively, and it appeared Alex had the upper hand, but the assailant wasn't giving up easily.

Listening to her enraged cries brought to life a desire within Bucky to protect her against all odds. Whatever pain he felt was nothing against compared to the fear he felt watching Alex take on their number one target by herself.

Forcing himself to run, Bucky swallowed the ungodly pain in his arm and went to her, but Alex beat him to it. She had rolled on top of the man and pinned him to the ground, but what happened next stopped Bucky in his tracks.

A light began to glow around Alex as her hand stayed fixed on the assailant's face. As the light grew brighter, the man's blood curdling scream split the night. The man's screams became more desperate as Alex continued, the light around her flickering brighter than ever before.

Still holding his arm, Bucky continued forward. "Alexis!"

She never heard him. The man below her continued the scream, but the energy in his screams started to falter.

"ALEX!" Bucky cried, trying to reach her, wherever she was inside herself. He came closer, his eyes moving from Alex to the assailant. To his utter horror, he saw that the man's face was thinning. His cheeks were gaunt, his eyes sunken into his own face, his mouth peeling back over his teeth.

_Holy shit, she's draining him._

Bucky grabbed her beneath her shoulders. "STOP, ALEX." She fought his help, even as he pulled her body from the man's. Her hand tried to stay on the target's face, but Bucky used all his remaining strength to wrench her free. They fell backwards together, Alex landing on top of him.

Bucky clutched her to his chest, his hand cupping her head. "Alex, can you hear me?" Fear gripped at his heart. "Are you okay?"

Alex wavered in his arms, blinking as if in a daze. "Bucky?" She turned her head and looked at him. "Wha...what happened? Where are we?"

He exhaled in relief and closed his eyes. "It's alright." He held her tighter, nuzzling her neck with his face. "You're alright. I got you."

He managed to prop them both up into a sitting position, Alex still secure in his arms against his chest. He pushed backwards toward the warehouse's wall and braced himself against it. There, he cradled Alex between his legs as she tried to come back to the present. He watched from a distance as Steve and Natasha entered the foray that continued. Together with Barton and Wilson, they were able to remove the rest of the targets.

He could've gotten up and helped - _should've _gotten up and helped - but he didn't. He stayed with Alex as she regained consciousness, her back resting against his chest and wrapped in the protection of his arms.

As the post-battle stillness settled over the group, Steve spotted Bucky and Alex. He took off at a sprint to join them, his eyes settling on Alex as he neared. "Is she alright?" he asked, kneeling.

"Good, but shaken" Bucky answered, helping Alex to her feet alongside Steve. "She needs a few minutes."

Steve nodded, then pressed the button on his earpiece. _"Stark - we're ready."_

_"Descending in two minutes" _ came Tony's response. _ "Need me to take out those cargo trucks coming up the road while I'm at it?" _

_"That'd be helpful" _ Steve replied with a smirk.

As blasts from the canons on the Quinjet made quick work of the incoming backup, Steve and Bucky supported Alex and helped her back to the group. The others looked on with concern, but nothing was said as Tony brought the ship to the ground. Barton grabbed the two bound targets and led them onto the opened hatch first, followed by Bucky and Alex and the remaining Avengers.

As Tony pulled the aircraft out of sight, he bombed the warehouse to oblivion as a final statement to Hydra.

+++++


	5. Chapter 5

The morning following the Comoros Mission, Bucky sat at his desk and stared at the entry in his notebook:

_ Strong desire to protect and care for someone. Seems very familiar. Seems right to me._  
_Ignored mission duties to protect, and would do it again. Also familiar. I think this was a part of me before._  
_ Feeling a new kind of fear developing. Can't identify it just yet. Not like any of my other fears.  
_ _Mind is running. Jumbled. But working through it._

He read his words over and over and somehow, it just didn't seem adequate enough for what he was actually feeling. The new sensations in his body and the thoughts that came with them were new to the person he was _now_ , but if he dug deep...really deep...he could almost remember a time long ago when none of it was new. Whatever was going on, it encouraged him. Some part of his old life and his old self may be coming back.

Bucky closed the notebook and rubbed his face. His five o'clock shadow was now three days old and long enough that it was starting to itch. He was still sore as fuck from the mission. His metal arm ached at the attachment point to the flesh of his shoulder, so much so it made him wonder if he would need a tune-up.

He went to the mirror in his bathroom and removed his t-shirt. Leaning in close to his reflection, he carefully inspected the edge of his arm and shoulder blade. Slowly, he circled his arm around and watched the plates sluggishly respond to his movement. He was definitely stiff, but whether he needed a tune-up or not, he still wasn't sure.

And yet, his issues weren't even his main concern. The only thing that truly concerned him was Alex.

After they returned from the mission, Alex retreated to her apartment and hadn't been seen since. Bucky struggled to keep his mind on other things, but it was becoming obvious that he needed to see her. He had to know if she was okay, and if she remembered those final moments before he pulled her from her opponent. Plus, he needed to know if what he was feeling for her was real.

Replacing his shirt over his head, Bucky grabbed his key card and headed to the East Wing where Alex's apartment was located. For a moment, he worried if maybe it was too soon to see her. Maybe some distance was needed so she could decompress after the mission. But the aching in his heart told him to go, and the confidence he had in his feelings told him he was doing the right thing.

When he approached her door, Bucky knocked softly with the knuckle of his index finger. "Alex?" He listened with ear to the door, but heard nothing. "Alex, it's Bucky."

A few seconds passed.

"Go away" she said, her voice close to the door but muffled.

"C'mon, don't be stubborn now" he teased. He waited, but no response came. With a sigh, he leaned his forehead against the door. "Please, Alex. Don't push me away. I just want to see how you're doing."

When no further comment came, he closed his eyes in defeat. He was about to turn away and leave when the door opened, catching him off guard.

Alex stood before him, hugging herself. She looked up at him sheepishly, eyes red and tired. She was dressed in loose fitting clothes, pajamas maybe, and she looked comfortable but was clearly feeling troubled.

"Hi." Her voice was weak and shaky.

Bucky's heart went out to her. "Hi."

She opened the door further, silently motioning for him to come in.

"It's good to see you" he told her, once inside. "I was...worried."

"About what?"

"How you were doing. How you were feeling." He tried to read her facial expression, but she wouldn't look him in the eyes.

"To say I've been better is the world's largest understatement" she admitted, walking away from him. "What I did out there...I cannot _ever _do again." She leaned against the window ledge and shook her head.

"Don't be so hard on yourself. You saved the mission. You helped _me _when I needed it."

"What I _did _was lose control of myself" Alex fired back. "And I almost killed someone because of it." She folded her arms over her chest, almost in self-protection against what she was about to admit. "Do you know why I lost control?"

Concern transformed Bucky's gaze. "No."

"It's because something snapped inside me when I saw..." She clenched her jaw at the memory. "...when I saw you in pain, when that asshole _shocked you_. It was like something inside me exploded."

Bucky realized what Alex was admitting, and it made his heart throb inside his chest with a familiar ache. He approached her, but kept a respectful distance. "Let me help you with this."

Her brown eyes flared. "_Help _me?!" A desperate laugh shook from her chest. "How can _anyone _help me? Why would anyone want to?"

"If there's someone who knows a thing or two about needing help controlling themselves, it's me" Bucky confessed. A muscle along his jaw twitched. "You don't have to do this alone. It doesn't have to be a lonely journey." His throat bobbed. "For either of us."

The start of fresh tears began to sting Alex's weary eyes. She remained silent out of fear, but whether it was fear of what he was asking, or fear she felt for the future, she didn't know. Maybe it was one in the same.

"I've been thinking about you nonstop since yesterday, Alex" Bucky continued, taking another step forward. "And I've been thinking about what you said to me the other day in the Practice Room."

Alex had nearly forgotten all about it. "Should I even ask what your answer is?"

"It's yes."

Realization dawned on her face, shocked by his answer. "Even...even after what you saw me do yesterday? What I could do to _you_?"

"Like I said, maybe I can help you the same way you plan to help me." He crossed the final distance between them, his eyes steady and a faint smile brimming. "When I pulled you off that man, I realized I wanted to do whatever I could to help you." A soft, embarrassed laugh escaped his lips. "I don't really understand a lot of these feelings," he said, pointing at his temple, "but I know enough to act on them this time. For the first time in a long time, my feelings make sense to me."

Alex studied him as he looked down at his hands. His dark hair fell over his brow, casting a shadow over his face.

"When Steve looked past everything I'd done and chose to support me, I felt so undeserving. I couldn't believe someone would actually care enough about the person I used to be to see past what I had become. He saw something was still there, somewhere inside me, and that made all the difference."

With this, Bucky's ocean eyes lifted and locked on to Alex. They were tormented, full of confusion and hope and regret. She thought he looked truly beautiful in that moment of vulnerability.

"I just don't want you to feel the same way I did." He did his best to try and smile. "If I can be the one to help you, then...give me that chance. I _want _to have that chance."

Something deep inside Alex tugged at a part of her that she'd kept hidden most of her life. It made her want to run far away, away from all of these people and back to her lonesome life before coming here. Too many times in the past she felt this tug at her heart, the butterflies in her stomach, the flicker of excitement that came with finding someone who connected with her - but it always ended in pain. _Every. single. time. _She promised herself years ago that she would never feel sorry for herself that she couldn't express affection the way others could, or that she couldn't get the chance to love the way others got to, but she never met anyone who thought she was worth the effort to try. Not until now.

"Bucky, I..."

"Call me James" he said.

Alex cocked her head. "What?"

"James. My real name." A smile spread across his face, replacing the shadow that had been there earlier. "Call me that instead. Because when I'm with you, I'm not Bucky anymore. I'm like my old self...the man I used to be. The man I _want _to be."

The gravity of his request hit Alex hard. She felt the urge to do something to show how much she appreciated him_. _So Alex stepped into him, her hands reaching for his. Alarm gripped Bucky at her unexpected touch.

"Wait, Alex, what if-"

"-I don't care what happens" she told him, squeezing his hands in hers. It was the first time she felt Bucky's prosthetic hand, and it was nothing like she expected. It was warm and smooth, and although it was unnatural, it was a part of him. It didn't give against her hand like his other did when she squeezed it, but she smiled up at him all the same. A moment passed as they waited for her touch to elicit a reaction, yet nothing happened. They stared into one another's eyes, lost in the longing they had for one another, and they waited. Still, nothing came. No transfer, no emotional onslaught, no white light. Nothing.

And that's when Alex kissed him.

Bucky felt her lips press against his before his mind even caught up to what was happening. Her lips were unfairly soft, her mouth inviting in ways he could never describe. It wasn't a long kiss, but it was slow and comforting in ways words could never be.

When Alex pulled away, her eyes studied his with apprehension. "Nothing happened," she whispered with awe. Her gaze lowered to Bucky's mouth.

"Oh something's happened, doll." He moved a piece of her hair from her face tenderly. "Can you guess?"

Alex pretended to think it over. "Hmm...you're falling for me?" Her eyes danced when gazed up at him.

Bucky cupped her face in his hands and drew her mouth to his, answering her. In response, Alex's body melded to his, her arms wrapping about his neck as she relented. The walls of fear crumbled around them, their need for one another and the comfort they found in each other's touch overpowering all else. Neither understood why a transfer didn't happen. All they knew was that they found something in one another, something safe and reassuring.

When they broke away, Alex looked upon Bucky in a whole new light. She brushed her fingers across his bottom lip, amazed at her ability to do so. "Thank you, James."

His mouth formed a humble smile, and he kissed her fingertips. "Thank _you, _Alexis."

* * *

Bucky and Alex agreed to practice transfers together a few times a week, time permitting. There was plenty of post-mission work to do following the night of their first kiss. The process itself was all new to Alex, and much of those few days were spent working alongside Bruce Banner, who introduced her to how it was all done. In addition, they processed the two captives from the mission, then handed them over to Maria Hill, and S.H.I.E.L.D. took it from there.

In the time that it took for these duties to wrap up, a few days had passed. Bucky and Alex weren't able to sit down to discuss everything that had happened the last time they were alone together, which made their longing for one another even more pronounced. They played the part well in the meantime, acting professional and aloof to any budding relationship that was lurking beneath the surface. They were both present for all post-mission briefings, taking their turn to describe what went down on the Island. Bucky made no mention of what he witnessed Alex do, nor did Alex mention it herself. It developed into a secret neither intended on keeping from anyone, but had happened anyway.

Finally, the pair had some down time, and agreed to do their first trial run that night. They were to meet at Alex's apartment around 11 pm. From there, they'd figure it out as they went.

Hours before Bucky left for her apartment, he found himself rifling through the clothes he had in his closet, trying to decide what was necessary to wear. _Do I dress nicer than usual? _he wondered. _ Is that considered trying too hard? Should I just as I am, dressed down and comfortable? Or does that come off as not caring? _

He let out a frustrated sigh.

Grabbing his notebook and pen, he took a seat on the floor of his closet and began to write:

_ Feeling anxious about seeing a girl. Want to impress her, but don't know how yet._  
_Feels familiar but scary. Too unsure of myself. Was I this anxious before the war?_  
_ Trying to remember how to do this. Confused about where to go from here.  
Not sure how to be myself when I'm still learning who that is._

He placed the pen back inside the notebook and closed it, his thoughts lingering on his entry. Maybe it was best if he didn't think so much. Everything seemed to work out better when he just went with his instincts.

Drawing his attention back to the pile of clothes, he decided to trust his instincts yet again. He went with a v-neck navy blue shirt, the same gray lounge pants he had on the day Alex first asked him about this idea, and a black hoodie. He pulled the sides of his hair back away from his face, wondering if maybe he should have shaved. Something told him Alex liked the short beard he kept, so he left it. His instincts hadn't failed him yet with Alex, and it likely wouldn't now. Not with such an important night ahead of them.

And in truth, it was thoughts about their trial run that buzzed through his mind on his walk there. It _was _an important night for them both. Not just for whatever was developing between them, but for what implications it might have on them as individuals and as Avengers.

_Just remember to trust your instincts_, Bucky told himself as he knocked on Alex's door.

The corner of her mouth lifted when she saw him. "Get in here." She pulled him in by the hem of his shirt, locking the door behind.

"That afraid of someone seeing us together?" he asked, slightly taken aback.

Alex made a face. "Of course not, silly." She wrapped her arms about his waist, hugging him close. "I just wanted this to be private in every way possible. For obvious and not so obvious reasons."

Being close to Bucky again was a relief for Alex. The past few days had been excruciatingly dull, and with the memory of Bucky's kiss still on her mind, not getting a moment to be alone with him was akin to punishment. And, if the light in his eyes meant anything, he felt the same.

"I missed you." Bucky angled his mouth to hers. "_And _this."

He pressed his lips against hers and once more, Alex was transported to some other life she never thought could be hers. _This _is what she thought about all week; the fullness of his mouth, the tender, curious way he carefully explored hers, that brief brush of his tongue as she opened to him...it made her feel more than just her nerve endings tingling. Warmth began to pool below her waist, waking the rest of her body up to desires she'd pushed away for too long.

"The trial run..." she uttered between kisses.

Bucky smiled against her mouth. "Just a little more..."

It was becoming more and more evident that whenever Alex was with Bucky, she felt like she was in some kind of old movie. His old school good looks he wore so well could have been right out of a classic romance. There was something sweet about the way he kissed her, and yet there wasn't a single thing innocent about it. He may have been cautious and unsure at first, but there was a smoldering heat between them now and his desire was unmistakable.

When he drew back again, Bucky spent a moment studying Alex's face. "Sorry if that was too greedy of me."

His boyish grin lit up the hardened, handsome lines of his face. "Never apologize for that," Alex told him, patting the firm pane of his stomach. "It was a long week for both of us...and the longest part may still await us."

She turned away as worry slipped back into her psyche. Bucky took her hand and forced her to look at him again. "We can go slow. Feel it out, see what happens when you...you know."

"When I invade your past?" Hearing herself say it out loud made her wince. "We really don't have to do this-"

"-We _do_. You know we do." Bucky was quickly learning some of the subtleties that gave Alex away. After decades of being who he'd been, he was left with plenty of talents he could still manage to use without lingering guilt. One of them was reading people. He could tell by the way Alex's shoulders were set that she was still determined to follow through with their plan. She carried that same confidence with her on the Comoros mission, and it had been with her the very first time he laid eyes on her. Now, there was just a hint of apprehension in the way she looked at him, but her resolve hadn't faltered. "We can do this, Alex. You've seen how it's different with us."

Alex did, and she still had no idea _why _it was different with him. Every time their fingers touched or their mouths met, she almost flinched out of fear. But each time had been the same: nothing catastrophic happened, no blinding light, and certainly no one flying across the room like that day in the Practice Room.

"You still with me?" Bucky asked, afraid maybe he'd pushed too hard.

Alex glanced up and smiled. "Still with you." She gave his hands a reassuring squeeze before letting go. "Let's do it here, in the middle of the room. I kind of already moved stuff out of the way, just in case..." Her eyes met his briefly. "And as cuddly as you look in that hood, I'm gonna need you to take it off."

Bucky did just that, then met Alex in the middle of the living room where she now sat cross-legged on the floor. He took a seated position across from her. "So how do we begin?"

Alex scooted closer until their knees were touching. "Honestly, I don't know if there's a right or wrong way to go about this. I'm just going to do exactly what did that first day." He brows drew together. "And again, above all else, I promise not to hurt you."

He leaned forward and gave her a kiss that was as light as a whisper. "I know."

It was all the encouragement Alex needed. She lifted her hands, closed her eyes, and placed her palms on Bucky's chest. It took only a second before the memories began to flash before her. They were jumbled at first; scattered scenes from years and moments she couldn't distinguish. She dug deep within her powers, diving head first into that dark well within her, forcing her powers to settle. It was the level of control she lacked on the mission; the kind of control she tried to have her entire life. It was exhausting to be inside someone while also being inside yourself, but she pushed on.

Finally, she tapped into something inside Bucky that made a pained exhale escape him.

_ An experiment table with straps. Masked strangers holding needles. White hot pain. Screams in the night. Terror of being alone. _

Alex swallowed thickly, but pressed on.

_ Incisions. Skull-splitting pain. A piece of wood placed in his mouth as the shocks came. More injections. More incisions. _

Across from her, Bucky shuddered. Alex didn't dare open her eyes or break her concentration now, but the sounds coming from him threatened to pull her from the darkness of his memories before she was finished.

_ The rumble of a train. Icy, jagged rocks. Falling. Screaming. Searing pain that nearly split him in two. Dark unconsciousness. _

Alex knew this memory. She'd felt this one before, back when her and Bucky were in the Practice Room. She honed in on it specifically, trying to get to the nightmarish details.

_ The high-pitched sound of a saw. Each breath as painful as the last. Bones breaking. _

Beads of sweat formed on Alex's forehead. Her hands began to shake, but she felt Bucky grab them and keep them steady.

_ Blood-curdling screams. Sickening delirium. Forced consciousness. Pain that knew no end and no limit. _

With all the control Alex could muster, she used her powers to remove the pain of these memories. Her hands shook harder, but Bucky held on to them. With his help, Alex dug deeper, wrangling those horrific emotions long enough to transfer them into her own body. Her stomach reeled as the onslaught began.

_Loss. So much loss. Family. Friends. Identity. _

Bile burned in her throat, but she swallowed it. Her entire body began to convulse, but Bucky held on, so Alex continued.

_Crippling despair. Fear. Torture. Emptiness. _

Alex removed them, one by one. Every muscle in her body ached and her teeth began to chatter. When she could no longer stand to see the things Bucky endured, she screamed, and that's when Bucky let go of her hands.

Immediately, Alex toppled over onto her side and began to vomit. Bucky went to her, holding her hair and steadying her shoulders as the force of the transfer released onto the floor in front of them. Over and over she retched, her tears mixing with exhausted coughs until finally, her vomiting slowed.

Bucky removed his shirt and used it to gently wipe Alex's face. He was sickened by what she just went through for him. If this was how it was always going to be, then he decided right then and there he wasn't worth it.

Alex clutched at his arms, her watery eyes finding him. "I'm so sorry..." Pain echoed through each of her sobs. "I'm so, _so _sorry..."

Bucky held onto her and rocked her. "Don't focus on any of it. It's all over." He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "You did well, and it's over now."

Alex continued to weep, but her breathing steadied with time. She didn't know how much time had passed before she felt Bucky lift her into his arms and carry her to her bed. He laid her down gently, smoothing her hair back from her face. "Try and sleep, doll."

She wanted to reach out for him, but her arm was too weak. "Don't go."

"I'm not going anywhere." He gave her a reassuring smile. "Just a few minutes, and I'll be right back."

Alex's eyes followed him as he left the room. She listened to the faint sounds of him moving about and realized he was cleaning up the mess she made. She should have been embarrassed, but she was too exhausted to feel anything. Her body was spent; her mind a scrambled, weary mess. Thoughts slowly left her as her body gave in to its weariness and her eyes fluttered closed. She was fast asleep by the time Bucky returned.

He tried to be as quiet as he could as he slid in beside Alex on the bed. She lay on her back, her pretty features softened by slumber and no longer pained by the things she saw inside his memories. Bucky remained on his side, wishing he could hug her close to him but not wanting to risk waking her. Instead, he was content to lay beside her, watching the gentle rise and fall of her breathing. It was comforting to see her peaceful now, but feelings of unworthiness lay heavy on his heart. He wasn't sure he could ever repay Alex for what she had done for him, but he would sure as hell try.

For the first time in years, Bucky slept that night with no nightmares.


	6. Chapter 6

When Alex awoke the next morning, every muscle in her body was stiff and her joints ached. When she opened her eyes, things didn't get much better. She waited until they adjusted to the pale morning light, but it only made her head pound. It seemed that every tooth in her head were pulsing little pain pockets. She would have groaned if her throat wasn't so dry.

Reluctantly, Alex fought against the pain in an attempt to shift onto her side, and was caught by surprise when she saw Bucky.

_Holy shit, he stayed._

Visions of last night came back to Alex all at once, her stomach tightening in response. She tried to breathe through it, letting whatever aftershocks from the night before dissipate before she opened her eyes again. When the visions passed, she looked once more on the sleeping figure in front of her.

_He stayed the whole night._

Bucky lay on his side, his metal arm draped over his abs and his hand resting on the pillow. It didn't even occur to Alex until then that he was even shirtless. Then she remembered _why _he was shirtless, and guilt sat heavy in her stomach.

_He cleaned me up and took care of me._

_And he stayed anyway._

Her eyes wandered over the muscles of Bucky's chest to the angry scars that bordered his mechanical shoulder. Metal plates met flesh in a series of red scar tissue, as if something with claws had scratched at the flesh. The metal extended well down the side of his abdomen to his rib cage. She had no clue how extensive it actually was until now.

_How could they do this to you_ ?

Very gently, Alex brushed her fingertips along the scarred edges. She traced along the metal plates, exploring the curve of his shoulder down to the lines of his bicep.

Blue eyes opened across from her.

Alex smiled, and Bucky returned the gesture. The silence between them was comfortable; a shared moment of quiet understanding of what happened the night before.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, his voice deep with slumber.

"Sore," Alex admitted, "but I'll live. How 'bout you? Did it...did it work?"

"It did."

She sighed and closed her eyes. "That's all that matters." A feeling of accomplishment filled her. All the aches and pain were worth it. Every ounce of whatever she vomited onto the floor was worth it. Which reminded her...

"Sorry about the mess, by the way." She looked at him with shame in her eyes. "I had no idea that was going to happen."

Bucky chuckled. "It was nothing, considering what you did for me." He reached over, his metal fingers entwining with hers. "I didn't get the chance to say it last night, but...thank you."

Alex lowered her gaze. "I should be the one thanking you. I wouldn't have kept control without your help."

"The deal was to help each other, and that's what we did."

"But I couldn't remove everything..."

"I never expected you to." Bucky lifted his hand to her cheek and gently caressed it. The fact that she didn't pull away from the metal, but leaned into it, was a gift all in its own. "I hardly feel worthy for what you've done for me so far. After seeing how sick you got..." He shook his head. "If that's how it's always going to be, then I'm not worth-"

Alex pressed her fingers to his lips, silencing him. "We'll keep working on it" she told him. "Together. As a team. That's the deal, right?"

A thought came to mind, causing Bucky to smile. "We do make a pretty good team, don't we?"

Alex finally felt the pain in her stomach subside enough to let a few butterflies through. "Probably one of the best."

Bucky leaned across the bed and kissed her, nuzzling his nose along her jaw before pulling away. "So, my next question..."

The way his eyes danced playfully gave Alex pause. "Oh boy, here it comes" she teased.

"Coffee?" He nodded to her stomach. "If you feel okay enough, I'd be happy to make us some."

Alex flattened against her pillow, a sheepish look transforming her expression. "There's one problem..."

Bucky lifted an eyebrow curiously.

"I don't have a coffee pot."

He laughed, his entire face scrunching happily. "Really?!"

"I've barely moved in, James!"

He nodded, eyes squinting as he considered her. "Alright. Alright." He accepted the challenge and hopped off the bed. "Not to worry, not all hope is lost. I'll go get us some."

Alex sat up on her elbows stiffly. "Where?"

"Downstairs in the break room."

"We have a break room?" Alex watched as Bucky searched for his hood, engrossed in the movement of his back muscles. He turned to look at her, and her gaze fell to the angled lines of his obliques disappearing below the hem of his pants.

"You mean to tell me no one has shown you the break room yet?"

He shrugged the hood over his shoulders and Alex regrettably lifted her gaze. "I guess not?" She gave him a smile. "Maybe you can give me the _real _Avengers tour sometime."

"I'd be more than happy to." He leaned over the bed, gave her a quick kiss, then ruffled her hair. "Don't go anywhere until I get back."

Alex saluted him. "Affirmative, soldier." She followed him with her eyes until he was gone, then slid deep beneath the covers wearing a grin she couldn't wipe from her face even if she wanted to.

* * *

Bucky arrived at the Avenger's kitchen and break room area to find Steve and Wanda sitting at the table conversing over steaming mugs. Both of them looked up when he entered, and he gave a small wave. "Morning."

"Morning, Buck." Steve eyed his friend as he passed. "Pull up a chair. Coffee in the pot is still fresh, if you're wondering."

Bucky glanced apologetically over his shoulder as he pulled two travel cups from the cupboard. "I'm getting it to go this morning."

Steve and Wanda exchanged glances.

Knowing his best friend like the back of his hand, Steve sensed something was different about Bucky right away. He understood he could close himself off from others at times, but this seemed different. "Is everything alright?"

Knowing _Steve _as well as he did, Bucky anticipated the question before it even left Steve's mouth. "Everything's fine." He suppressed a smile. "Great, even."

Wanda's eyebrows rose as she looked at Steve. She hid her growing smirk behind her mug of coffee as she took a sip. Across the table, Steve's brow pinched together as he studied Bucky even closer. He couldn't help his protective side - and he _was _working on it - but truthfully, nothing seemed amiss. In fact, Bucky appeared genuinely happy. There was a lightness in the way he moved; a trait Steve wasn't used to seeing in him.

"Alex isn't feeling well this morning," Bucky added, as if answering the puzzle Steve was silently trying to put together. "I thought I'd grab her some coffee while I was here."

Realization swept over Steve's face, easing the lines that had formed. Across from him, Wanda sat forward in her chair. "Is she okay?"

"Yeah, just a little under the weather." Bucky shoved a few creamers in the pocket of his hood, then raised the to-go cups in acknowledgement of them both. "Sorry to chat and run."

Steve waved a hand casually. "No apologies necessary." He was about to let Bucky go without any more pestering, but he remembered the meeting they were supposed to have later that morning. "Don't forget: Tony's office. 1100 hours."

Bucky paused. "Tony's office?"

"Phase 2 of the Comoros Mission?" Wanda added, hoping to jog his memory.

"Oh...right, yeah. I'll be there."

"Keep us up to date on how Alex is feeling," Steve mentioned.

"Will do." Bucky pushed into the door with his back, leaving them with a smile.

Steve and Wanda both gave a wave. As soon as Bucky was gone, they stared at each other with question written all over their faces.

"Did I hear all of that correctly?" Steve asked Wanda.

"I think you did." She smiled and took another sip of coffee. "Bucky feels great."

"You heard it too?"

Wanda nodded. "There can be no mistake."

"And he's bringing Alexis coffee?" Steve asked.

"Maybe _she's_ why he feels so great."

"Huh. Maybe." Steve tapped his fingers on the table, mulling it over. He glanced up and saw Wanda grinning. "What?"

"Bucky's got a giiirrrrlllfffrriiieennndd" she teased, wiggling in her chair.

* * *

"You don't have to go if you aren't feeling up to it," Bucky told Alex as he handed her the coffee.

"I'll feel guilty if I don't." She made room for him on the edge of the bed, where he perched next to her. "Especially since I'm not actually _sick_-sick."

"If you need proof otherwise, I can show you my shirt."

Alex grimaced over the brim of her cup. "Don't remind me." She took a drink of the warm liquid and the taste was blissful. At first, she thought maybe coffee was the last thing she'd need after the night before, but it turned out to be exactly what her body craved. She lacked energy, and her throat was raw enough that any warm drink would do. Coffee just happened to be the best of both worlds. "This hits the spot. Thank you."

"You're very welcome." He stood, regret in his blue-gray eyes. "I better be off."

Alex was in the middle of making a sad puppy-face when she saw, of all things, Bucky pull a cell phone out of his pants pocket.

"I'm not really the greatest with this thing," he admitted shyly, "but I'm getting better at it. So..." His expression was full of hope when he looked at her.

Alex couldn't believe it, but was flattered all the same. "James Barnes, are you asking me for my phone number?"

"I am."

"Do you know how to put a new number into your contact list?"

"I might."

Alex bit her bottom lip. "Here, I'll put it in for you." He willingly handed over the cell, to which she added herself to his very bare contact list. "There. Now don't forget to use it."

"I won't, trust me." He slipped the phone back in his pocket, feeling rather proud of himself. "Rest, okay? I'll come by and check on you later."

She tipped her head as Bucky's lips closed in on hers, wishing she had more time to savor their softness.

Bucky was thinking just the same on the walk back to his apartment. He felt many things on that walk, and none of them were anything he was used to feeling.

He made a quick entry in his notebook before he showered and headed to the meeting:

_ Really falling for this one girl. She's special, for many reasons._   
_She makes me feel less like a failure and more like the man I think I was._   
_She's helped remove some of my pain. Somehow._   
_I hope I can make it worth her while._   
_ My first kiss since the war was with her. Since then, it's been easier to show emotion.  
I think I'm finally making progress._

* * *

Almost everyone from the Comoros Mission was gathered in Tony's office by the time Bucky arrived. He gave a nod to those who watched him come in, then took a seat next to Sam in the back of the conference room. Luckily, only Barton trailed behind him, and Tony's annoyance seemed curbed for the time being.

Tony sat deep in his chair, rocking back and forth as he waited. He checked his watch, looked at the door, then looked at those present. "Where's Markos?"

Bucky cleared his throat, drawing the eyes of everyone in the room. "She, uh...she's sick today."

"Sick?" Tony seemed more surprised than concerned. "With what?"

Steve's jaw set. "Does it matter?"

"I would say it does for this mission."

"She apologizes for not being able to make it" Bucky added, hoping it would smooth things over. "Really. She feels guilty."

Tony considered this. One question that remained in his mind was: _how the hell would Barnes know? _He had his suspicions, but they'd have to wait. He'd solve the mystery later.

With a shrug, Tony stood. "Fine. Someone will have to repeat everything I'm about to say to her if she plans on making it to Thimpu. And yes: that's where Hydra's other facility is likely built, and where we'll be going to fuck shit up for them."

As Tony continued to give the overview of their next potential mission, Sam leaned across the arm of his chair. "So...Markos, huh?"

Bucky face darkened, but he kept his eyes on Tony. "What's that supposed to mean."

"Just curious how _you _know that she's sick."

"Well I'm curious why _you _care." Bucky turned his head and stared at Sam irately.

Hardly phased, Sam shrugged and then turned his attention back to Tony. Bucky continued to stare at him for a moment longer before he did the same.

"S.H.I.E.L.D's interrogation of the two captives went swimmingly" Tony proceeded. "I'll let Maria explain." A teleconference screen flickered to show Maria Hill sitting in an office in Washington D.C.

"Hey, Avengers. Sorry I couldn't be there." Her no-nonsense smile appeared for only a moment before disappearing. "Let's get down to what the interrogation gave us, shall we?"

She began to recount all the information and details about Hydra's biological involvements in Bhutan when Bucky sensed Sam leaning towards him again.

"So, like...you two a thing? Or?"

Bucky's stare went ice cold.

Next to him, Sam smirked.

Maria continued on with details of the interrogation, then segued into how Bhutan could be the Avenger's next target. If further reconnaissance proved that Hydra truly was harboring another weapons operation in Bhutan, then the Avengers would likely be stepping in to manage it. At least, that's what Bucky gathered from Maria and Tony's long-winded account of everything. He was finding it difficult to keep his attention focused on the information in front of him when ideas kept popping up in his head.

Two things were becoming important to him now that he and Alexis were getting closer. Number one, he wanted to show how grateful he was for what she was doing for him, regarding his painful memories. Number two, and probably the most confusing for him, was to show how much he actually cared for her. He was stuck on this for a large portion of the meeting, his concentration wavering between ideas for Alex and the information being presented in front of him.

Suddenly, a faint memory lurking somewhere beneath the veil inside Bucky's mind came to the forefront. He almost smiled right there in the middle of everyone when the memory came to him: his mother used to call this "courting". He couldn't believe he remembered it. It stirred something within him, that he may have done this in the past, long before the war, but he couldn't be sure. It blossomed into an idea of what he could do for Alex, but he'd need Steve's help in order to pull it off.

The meeting finally came to an end, and Bucky was never happier. He felt suffocated in the room, mostly from the constant stare coming from Sam, but also because he wanted to avoid more questions like the ones Sam had asked him. He wasn't used to the attention being directed his way (not that it was a lot, but it made him uncomfortable all the same). So, even though he was the first to leave the office, he lingered outside the door and waited for Steve. When his friend made it out into the hallway, Bucky motioned for him. "Steve!?"

Rogers halted, his expression warming. "Hey! Sorry about Tony in there."

Bucky waved it off. "Already forgot about it."

They began a slow walk down the hallway, letting the others filter out and out of earshot. When they were alone, Steve looked sidelong at Bucky. "So what's up?"

"This might sound odd, but..." He knew the following question was about to open himself up to Steve's good humored teasing, but he was willing to risk it. "Do you happen to still have that old record player of your mother's?"

Steve's eyes lit up with intrigue. "Whyyyy?"

"I want to borrow it."

Steve turned and faced Bucky in the middle of the hallway, his expression beaming. "Why do I get the sense you're plotting something?"

"Plotting?!" Bucky said with a laugh. "Come on, at least use a better word."

"Alright, alright, I see I've hit a nerve." Steve folded his arms over his chest, casting a skeptical but humorous eye at his friend. "Why do I get the sense you're about to...oh, I don't know...take a girl dancing?"

Bucky snapped his finger. "Now you've got it." He felt himself smiling when he saw Steve's face turn into nothing but a huge grin.

"Just like old times, eh Buck?"

The two men looked at one another with shared understanding. Bucky actually thought he detected some amount of pride brimming in Steve's gaze. He knew that gaze; knew it better than he knew parts of himself. Every time he saw it, it brought him back to a piece of his past that he clung to. Now, that look of pride on Steve's face made him feel all the more confident in his decision to ask him about the record player.

"I may even have some Cole Porter stashed away" Steve added with a wink.

Bucky's surprise came out as a laugh. "No way. You hung on to that all this time?"

"All this time."

"Glenn Miller?"

"Saved 'em all." Steve wrapped an arm over Bucky's shoulder. "And they're yours for whoever's lucky enough to get a dance with you."

Bucky averted his eyes. "I think you know who I'm talking about..."

Steve began to walk, his arm still slung around Bucky. He stared down the hallway, his smile a permanent fixture on his face. "I have my guesses."

* * *

In Alex's opinion, nothing felt better than a hot shower when she felt less than stellar. And yet, _nothing _compared to the shower she just took. Her muscles craved the warmth of the water. They soaked up the heat like sponges, giving energy back to her depleted body. Her head felt clearer with each passing minute. By the time she was finished, that sluggish, numb feeling she had all morning was now totally gone.

As she was finishing up in the bathroom, she heard someone wrapping on her door rather impatiently. "Hold on!" she called, quickly toweling through her hair. Tossing a robe on over the tank top and boy shorts she was wearing, she padded over to the door as the knocking continued. "I'm coming, I'm coming..." Whoever the hell it was either very clearly in a hurry, or the matter was way more serious than she was hoping it was.

Alex was surprised to see none other than Tony Stark standing on the other side of the door. "Oh," she uttered. The impatient knocking suddenly made sense.

"Nice to see you too." Tony smirked. "Expecting someone else?"

Alex's expression flattened. "No."

She didn't invite him in, but Tony entered anyways. He spun smoothly on his heels, getting a feel for her studio apartment in one circular motion. "Pretty plain Jane looking apartment, Markos. I'm disappointed."

"Been a little too busy to play interior decorator."

"And sick, from the sounds of it." He stared at her over the nose of his glasses.

Alex inhaled, realizing that's really why he stopped by. Not to check on her, of course, but to see if she really was sick. She supposed Bucky ended up having to explain why she wasn't at the meeting after all.

"If you're here about the meeting, I really _am _sorry," she began, but Tony stopped her.

"It's fine. Honestly. Barnes got the footnotes and will be passing them on to you." He helped himself to one of her chairs. "I really just wanted to check and see how everything _else_ was going."

"Everything else?" She paused, assuming he meant her adjustment as an Avenger. "Well, I thought the last mission went really well, my suit is amazing - thank you again - and of course, Bruce was a wealth of information in the days following..." She stopped when she saw Tony's hand go to his chin, clearly waiting for her to finish. "Okay, what? What's that look for?"

"You tried your little experiment out on Barnes, didn't you."

It didn't come out as a question, but a statement. Air caught in Alex's throat by the suddenness of it. "What makes you think that?"

"The sickness, the bounce in Barnes' step, him knowing why you're sick and yet no one else does, I could go on and on." Tony lifted both his hands. "And hey, I know I rejected your offer, but at least keep me informed of what happens so I can keep tabs on everyone."

"Okay stop right there" Alex said, throwing an open palm up at him. "I thought you didn't care enough to even bother following up on what the experiment might lead to? In fact, you made it _very _clear you wanted nothing to do with it." She settled into a defensive stance and stared at him. "As far as I'm concerned, that means whatever results come from the trial runs."

Tony's slick smile appeared. "So you DID try it?"

"What!? _No?_" Alex's nerves began to funnel upwards from her stomach, unsure of how long she could keep up the facade. The way Tony was looking at her, with that excitable look that a scientist gets whenever they're on the verge of discovery, was enough to make her feel horrible for lying. She didn't want to give him the gratification of knowing her and Bucky were even practicing together on one another's issues, especially since he so vehemently turned her down.

Tony remained staring up at her, biting the nail of his thumb with glee. Alex knew he was waiting for her to admit it, but she couldn't do it. "Can I ask you something, Tony?"

"Fire away."

Her sharp brows angled together. "Why _did _you turn down my offer last week?"

The question changed Tony's entire demeanor. The smirk he wore disappeared, the light in his eyes darkened slightly, and he stopped nibbling his nail. A heaviness seemed to draw his shoulders downward as he adjusted his position in the chair. "You want the asshole answer or the honest answer?"

"I'm fairly used to the asshole answer, so let's go with the honest one." She gave him a sympathetic smirk. "Unless they're one in the same?" Clearly, whatever he was about to tell her gave him some degree of discomfort.

He matched her smirk with his own. "I guess it all comes back to what you said. About the demons and who's willing to face them." He removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm just not there yet, Markos. I've got too many of 'em."

"Demons?"

"Yeah. Loads and loads of demons. Demons for days."

Alex could empathize. Besides Tony's brain power and his sheer level of genius that came from that power, there was a deeply conflicted man living inside that body. She was learning that Tony didn't just wear an Iron Man suit as a protective exterior; he wore his personal defense mechanism every day. That fact alone made her and Tony more alike than Alex cared to admit. They may have had different ways of keeping people at arm's length, but they still did it. The difference was, Alex was trying to change that.

"Well, I know you won't take me up on it" she said, standing once more, "but the offer's still on the table, if you ever change your mind."

"Thanks for that" Tony said, meeting her at eye level. "Maybe one day." He could sense they'd reached the end of the conversation, so he headed for the door. If her and Barnes were running trials on one another, it didn't seem like she was going to admit it.

Before he turned to leave, his eyes wandered to Alex's small kitchen table. Hanging off the back of one of the chairs was a leather jacket, which just so happened to include a small Howling Commandos patch sewn on the shoulder.

Tony met Alex's gaze with a smile. "Ya know, I never took you for the dark and broody type."

Alex tilted her head in question. "How do you mean?"

"Oh, pfft. It's nothing. Just a random thought." He exited the door with a wave. "Thanks again for the chat, Markos."

Alexis had no clue what Tony was talking about. She closed the door, finding the entire conversation with him to be wholly strange.

As she turned to head back to the bathroom to finish getting ready, she halted mid-step. She turned her head slowly, her eyes going back to her kitchen table.

_Ya know, I never took you for the dark and broody type._

Her eyes locked on to Bucky's leather jacket hanging over the back of the chair.

"Well _shit_" she uttered.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Greetings, friends! Just wanted to drop by and say thank you for all the support I've been receiving from you all. It means the world to me. **
> 
> **As a heads-up for the chapter you are about to read: things are about to get..........steamy. ;)**

The next morning, Alex finally took the time to familiarize herself with the Avengers selection of personal use vehicles. She rode the elevator down to the underground garage with an idea of what she might find there. What she ended up seeing, however, was even more excessive than she expected. Stark Industries had outdone themselves yet again with providing the best for the Avengers team: every make and model of car, SUV, and truck were available for use, each one decked out in a sleek black and chrome design complete with tinted windows.

Given that Alex only had plans to run a few errands she'd been putting off (food for her apartment, decor for her apartment, new bed linens for her apartment - the list was endless), she chose one of the more pedestrian looking cars. Errands didn't necessarily prompt the use of an over-the-top, Stark-styled SUV, as tempted as she was to try one.

Once in the city, Alex felt more like her old self than she did when she was stuck in the compound. The anonymity of being in a city brought back visions of her solo life in Boston, before Nick Fury recruited her. When she wasn't targeting opportunities to help others with the use of her powers, she was happy to blend in to the masses. Being 'just another number' was familiar to her, despite how lonely it was. At the very least, by blending in, she wasn't looked at as a freak. But that life was behind her. After everything that happened in her life in just the past few weeks, it was hard to believe what a change her life had taken.

The appreciation Alex had for those changes stayed with her as she ran her various errands. She stopped in a few stores that sold houseware items, purchasing a stereo first and then a few adornments thereafter. She found some decent bed linens, and then she found bed linens worthy of a Stark paycheck, so she indulged herself and chose those instead.

As she was trying to decide which color to go with, Alex felt her pocket vibrate. When she looked at her cell, her heart fluttered in her chest when she saw it was a text from Bucky.

_ B: Morning, darling. Did this text send? Please tell me you got this. I'm not used to texting. _

She laughed out loud in the store when she read it. She texted back, beginning a conversation that left her anxious and nervous and feeling all kinds of special:

_A: Yes, I got it. Nice job, old man. _

_ B: Watch who you're calling old. What are you up to? I stopped by your place but no answer. _

_ A: In the city. Finally getting shit for my apartment. Next time you're over, you'll see some changes. Hopefully you like them. _

_B: I'm sure I will. Any plans tonight? _

_A: Nope. Not yet, anyway. ;)_

_ B: Good. I'm planning something special. Me and you, my place, 7 or so? _

Alex felt her heart pounding inside her chest as she stared at her phone. Something special? What could that mean?

_A: I'll be there. Should I wear something aside from my usual?_

_B: Yes. Can't wait. See you tonight. _

She put the phone back in her pocket and tried to calm her pounding heart. She stood in the middle of the aisle, staring blankly at the floor, feeling like her excitement would burst from the inside-out as she tried to gather her thoughts.

"Well, looks like I need to go dress shopping now," Alex said aloud. Thankfully, no one was around her in the aisle. She was positive the thrilled grin that was plastered across her face might have drawn a few sideways glances.

With anticipation of what the night might hold, Alex hurried and finished everything on her to-do list, then took herself dress shopping.

* * *

Later that evening, Bucky stood in front of his bathroom mirror, his waist wrapped in a towel and an electric razor to his face. Steve suggested the electric razor some months ago, and he still couldn't believe what an amazing tool it was. What used to result in cuts and razor burn was now two minutes of a buzz with no cuts. Some things were better left in the 40s, and manual shaving was one of them.

After finishing getting himself ready, Bucky went about getting his place ready. What Alex didn't know was that she wasn't the only one who'd been shopping recently. The evening before, he'd gone out to try and find all the right items he'd need for their night together. He wasn't well versed in some of the items he picked up, but he did the best he could in getting something Alex would like. At least he hoped so, anyway.

Since Steve had dropped off the record player earlier in the day, Bucky already had that set up. Steve even gave him a refresher on how to use it, which he did not need, but he let Steve fuss anyway. He could tell his friend was excited for him, and that excitement was contagious. Bucky remained full of hopeful energy as he went about setting the table with glasses and a bottle of wine, then set about the candles. In the middle of his apartment, he cleared a space by moving the furniture to the perimeter of the room. Doing so revealed that his hardwood floors needed some attention, so he quickly borrowed a mop from the janitorial crew downstairs. Being busy calmed his nerves in the interim, but they steadily strengthened as the hours ticked away towards 7 o'clock.

Around 6:30 or so, Bucky took a moment to bring out his notebook and jot down what he was feeling:

_ Got a date tonight. My first one since the war._  
_Confused by all the emotions I'm having. Trying to trust my instincts._  
_Bottom line is to show how much I care._  
_Memories of my life before the war are trying to surface._  
_I can feel them, but they are also just out of reach._  
_Wish I could remember. Maybe I wouldn't be so nervous. Or maybe I would?_  
_ Having someone to care about is nice. It feels right.  
Life doesn't feel so empty anymore. _

He glanced at his watch and realized it was almost time, so he shoved the notebook back in his bedside table and hurried out to the living room area. He lit the candles he'd placed around the room and turned the lights down. The pit of his stomach began to tighten with nerves as he took one last look around, making sure he didn't miss any details.

At exactly 7 o'clock, a knock could be heard at his door.

Trying to steady himself with a deep inhale, Bucky answered the door. What he saw on the other side took his breath away.

Alex smiled up at him bashfully. "Hi, soldier."

Bucky was at a loss for words. Alex looked beyond stunning. She wore a black dress made of soft satin that fell just above her knees, giving him a view of her long, lean legs. She'd done her hair in soft waves that draped over her bare shoulders, leading his eyes down to the curve of her breasts accented by the satiny material. For the first time, he got a look at the half-sleeve tattoo she had on her right arm; he had no idea she even had one. She stared up at him with a smirk that could literally end him; her eyes framed behind long lashes and a dark eye shadow that made their chocolate color stand out even more.

"Wow, I, uh..." He swallowed the fear that had suddenly risen into his throat. "You're beautiful, Alexis. Just beautiful."

"Thank you," she said, her gaze traveling down his body. "You clean up well yourself, James." As soon as she said it, she realized how much of an understatement it was. Bucky not only cleaned up well, he damn near looked like he walked out of a magazine. The first thing Alex noticed was that he shaved, despite the fine shadow that had already begun to reappear along his jawline. He wore a navy button down shirt that somehow fit over his metal arm, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. It was tucked into a pair of black dress pants that looked as sharp as his gaze did while he took in her image. His hair was down and looked so soft that Alex's fingers begged to be in it. Somehow she found restraint, but she wasn't sure how long that would last.

Bucky took her by the hands and pulled her gently inside. "Are you ready for your surprise?"

"I've been waiting all day" she teased. He was large enough that just standing in front of her kept whatever was behind him hidden. All she could tell were that the lights were off, despite a glow coming from the living room. She let him lead her there, and when he opened up to let her take in the view, she softly gasped. "_James..." _

_"_ Yeah?" His smile was brimming from ear to ear. "I did pretty good, didn't I?"

Alex walked further into the room, astounded by the effort he obviously put into getting it ready. A table was set with two glasses, an open bottle of wine, and two candles. At least a dozen more were lit all over the room, which had been cleared of furniture except for one small table in the middle. On it was a record player, which Bucky now went to and adjusted the needle. A few crackles and pops were heard, and then a 40s era jazz song began to play. It was a sweet and slow; the perfect backdrop to what awaited.

Alex covered her mouth as she stared at him. "All of this? For _me?"_

"Just wanted to show you how much I care."

Everything about him in that moment was so soft, Alex actually had to remind herself that he was a formidable assassin. His blue-grey eyes sparkled in candle light; round, attentive, and full of desire. There was a hint of shyness to his smile, but desire also lay there as well. He licked his bottom lip as he stared at her, and Alex felt her resolve weaken even further.

"Would you like some wine?" he asked.

She'd become so transfixed by Bucky's gaze that she had to clear her throat before answering. "Yes, please."

"I hope you like red?" He gathered their glasses and handed Alex hers, then poured her some of the red liquid.

"Wine is wine and I love it all." Her joke made Bucky's smile grow even more.

"Good, because I bought three other types in case this wasn't the right one."

Alex let out a giggle. "Really?"

"I had to make sure I found something you liked" he replied, placing the bottle back on the table.

She shook her head, completely amazed by the lengths he went to. "And the record player?"

"You can thank Steve for that."

"I'll be sure to."

Bucky came and stood before her again and raised his glass. "To us."

Alex raised hers as well. "To us. Best team ever."

A laugh played over Bucky's lips as he took a drink, his eyes never leaving Alex. She wore some kind of gloss on her lips that left a mark on her glass. He never wanted to be a glass more in his life.

Alex stepped into him, closing the distance between them. Bucky's arm slipped instinctively around her waist, and all over again she felt the protection she always felt with him. "Thank you. For all of this. This is more than I could ever deserve."

"You deserve it and more."

He smiled at her and Alex couldn't wait any longer. She had to feel the fullness of his mouth against hers. Luckily, she didn't have to wait long. Bucky dipped his head and drew her lips to his, tasting wine and a hint of something fruity. The gloss maybe. He didn't know. His head was swimming at the brush of her tongue against his. All other thoughts left him.

They came up for air, already drunk off one another.

"I have something else to show you" Bucky whispered against her lips. "Care to see?"

"Absolutely." Alex took another sip of wine, watching Bucky go to the table where the record player was. He opened up a small drawer she hadn't even noticed and pulled out some kind of necklace chain. "What's that?" she asked. As he handed it to her, she realized what it was and her mouth opened in shock. "No way..." Her eyes lifted. "Your dog tags?"

Bucky's smile turned bashful. "Steve was able to retrieve them from the museum so I could have them...you know, to try and jog some memories..."

Alex handled them with the utmost care, rolling them in her fingers to read the blurred letters punched into the metal:

JAMES B BARNES  
32557038 T42 -43B  
MR G M BARNES  
_ 160 STATE ST  
_ _NEW YORK NY P_

"What does it all mean?" Alex knew she probably sounded like an amateur, but she was genuinely interested.

Bucky looked over her shoulder as she held his tags. "Well, each line stands for something different. Name, serial number, tetanus immunization, blood type..."

Alex glanced back at him. "And this?" She pointed to the other name.

"Next of kin. My father."

"Ahh." She couldn't believe what she was holding. It was an actual piece of history, and she felt undeserving of even touching it. "This was your address, at the time?"

The corner of his mouth lifted. "I guess so. I don't remember it. I don't even remember my father."

Alex turned to face him, sympathy replacing her awe. She reached up and caressed his cheek with her thumb. "It'll come to you someday. If I can keep removing all the bad things, maybe it will finally make room for the good things to come back."

"Maybe." His expression grew sad. "I just hate what you went through the other night."

"I know, babe. But we'll get better at it. I'll get stronger and my control will get better, and slowly but surely, we'll remove the layers of hurt away."

The way Alex called him 'babe' made Bucky feel like he'd won the lottery. His nerves came back to him in that moment when Alex leaned in to kiss him. It was a simple kiss full of promise, but it felt like heaven all the same.

"Thank you for showing me a part of your past" she said.

Bucky could tell by the way Alex was staring up at him that she meant every word she said. "I wish I could show you more. More of the good stuff, anyways." He took a seat on the couch, patting the cushion next to him. Alex gladly joined. "I guess I wanted you to know it wasn't all bad."

"And I want to see it all" she replied. "But we're not so different, you and I. I think you'd find there is a lot of darkness in my past as well."

"Then I'd like to learn about it all. Whatever you're willing to share."

"You may be the only person that's ever cared to listen." She could taste the bitterness of her past in that statement, so she swallowed more wine as a distraction.

Bucky sensed her hurt. He knew what it was like, and how it left a hole in his heart. "If it makes a difference, I know how you feel. If it wasn't for Steve..." He shook his head. "He's really been the only one in my life to care. Even after everything that happened, he was always there. Even from the beginning, I had Steve. Long before the war."

"Well let's start there. At the beginning." Alex settled in closer. "I'd love to hear all about what you remember of you and Steve from back in the day."

And so she listened with great intent as Bucky recalled the memories that came to him from the early days of his and Steve's friendship. Sometimes the story brought a smile to her face - even both their faces - and sometimes it made her hurt. No matter the tale, Bucky always seemed to end, especially when he recounted a tale of the pre-serum Steve he knew. It revealed to Alex all the layers that existed within Captain America, and made her like Steve even more. And although Bucky could barely remember his family, he had one vague memory of his sisters, and a few scattered pieces of his mother. He shared it all with her, painting a picture of a young James Barnes.

"So how about you?" Bucky asked. "I'd love to know where you came from. What you were like when you were younger. What your folks were like."

Alex adjusted on the couch, settling deeper into Bucky's arms. "Similar to you, it's hard for me to recall the good parts." She ran the pad of her finger around the edge of her wine glass. "Not because I can't remember, but because I seem to only remember the bad. Those have always stood out more."

"I saw a picture in your apartment of you and a girl at the beach. Was that your sister?"

"Yes." Alex glanced up and smiled. "I miss her the most. We were close, but after our parents died we became even closer. Though we could never show it by hugs or even a simple peck on the cheek, we did it through talking and sharing everything." She smiled at the thought. "It was a lonely childhood, to be honest. Hell, it's been a lonely life, having to deal with these." She held up her hands.

Bucky took one and kissed it. His eyes cooled as he looked at her. "Maybe it doesn't have to be lonesome anymore."

They looked into one another's eyes and shared a smile that spoke for what each was thinking. Neither felt lonely when they were with each other. For whatever reason, Alex's sense of touch didn't react the same way with Bucky as it did every other person she ever encountered. She was beginning to think there was some predestined reason for it, even though she didn't truly believe in such a thing. The more and more she learned about Bucky, though, the more and more her position on that sentiment began to change.

For Bucky, no one understood him quite the way Alex did. Most kept their distance from him, not bothering to ask how he was or how everything was going with his recovery. He kept to himself, only bothering Steve with something if it came up. He was, by every definition, a solo artist. He'd worked alone as the Winter Soldier and he'd recovered alone in Wakanda. Now he had a team around him, but he still preferred to remain solo when he could. That was...until Alexis showed up.

A new song began to play, the instrumental notes flowing across the room to where they sat together. Alex closed her eyes and tried to picture herself in Bucky's day. The mental picture came to her easier than she thought it might. "I love your choice in tunes, by the way."

"Yeah?" Bucky hugged her close with the arm that was draped over her shoulder. "You don't think it's too old and boring?"

"Boring!?" Her dark eyes met his. "_Please_."

A proud smile spread across his face. "I'm glad you like it."

They listened quietly, Alex comfortably in the crook of Bucky's arm while his hand stroked her hair.

"Did you tell Steve why you decided to borrow the record player, by chance?" Alex asked.

Bucky only laughed. "I think he figured it out on his own."

"So did Tony."

"Tony?"

"He saw your jacket in my place when he stopped by."

"Guess we can add him to the growing list," Bucky said with some humor. "Seems that Sam also thinks something is going on between us."

"Well, he's not wrong" Alex teased.

"No, but it's likely the only time I'll ever approve of him being right" Bucky added flatly.

Alex bit back a laugh. Bucky's relationship with his teammates was something she was still getting used to, and still had plenty left to learn.

Speaking of learning, Alex turned her attention to the record player and the box of records that sat next to it. Although she wished she could stay in Bucky's arms the whole night, she couldn't help her curious side. She stood from the couch, pulling Bucky with her. "Tell me about this 'old' music you thought I wouldn't like."

"What would you like to know?" He watched Alex as she took a sip of wine and lazily flipped through his collection. His eyes lowered to the curve of her backside, the slinky fabric of her dress highlighting every asset. He swallowed heavily as he felt his pants begin to tighten.

"I have to say, I'm not familiar with many of these." Alex lifted a particular record out and held it against her chest, facing him. "But I _have _heard of this guy."

"Glenn Miller" Bucky said with a chuckle. "I'd only hope so. He's a legend."

She replaced the record and looked through some of the others. "Which of these is your favorite?"

Bucky gave a shrug. "Hard to say, really." He reached into the pile and brought out another selection. "Although _this _one..."

He trailed off, but Alex saw that now-familiar glimmer returning to his eyes. She questioned him with the raise of an eyebrow, but he didn't answer. He just replaced the current record with the one he'd pulled from the pile and adjusted the needle.

As a new song began to play, Bucky extended a hand to Alex. "May I have this dance?"

Alex was smitten by what was happening. She'd never been asked to dance before, let alone by someone as dashing as the man before her. "It would be my pleasure."

She set her glass down on the table as Bucky stepped up to her. He lifted his arms in invitation. Alex fell into place in front of him, one arm draped over his metal shoulder while the other was clasped in his flesh hand. He held it close to center of his chest as they began to dance slowly. The music took the both of them back to a different time and place, and there was no other place either of them wanted to be.

Bucky gazed lovingly down into Alex's eyes, joy subtly transforming his face. "Do you know how long it's been since I've danced with a girl? Let alone someone as gorgeous as you?"

The question seemed so innocent, if not for the hand that trailed down the center of her back. It came to rest on the low of her back, pulling her closer. Alex's body warmed in response. "I'm glad I can be that girl now."

The music drifted in the background, and the pair became lost in one another's gaze. They seemed to be floating together. With each sway, it became painfully obvious how much Alex had truly fallen for Bucky.

And then she heard the lyrics of the song they were dancing to:

_ I've never been in love before  
_ _Now all at once, it's you._

When Alex looked up at Bucky, she could tell he knew she was making the connection.

_ I thought my heart was safe_  
_ And I thought I knew the score.  
I've never been in love before._

"The lyrics" she uttered.

Bucky nodded, his smile soft and his gaze tender.

_ So please forgive this helpless haze I'm in  
_ _I've really never been in love before._

The music continued to play, the woman's voice doing more than just singing. Her smooth vocals, the classic sound of the instruments, the atmosphere it painted: it solidified something between Alex and Bucky. The lyrics painted a story; it was _their _story, of two souls aching to leave a dark past full of hurt and emptiness behind. Those pasts brought them together to this very moment, where Alex danced with the soldier who'd somehow stolen her entire heart since the moment they met.

As the song came to an end, no words were spoken. Bucky slipped a hand behind Alex's neck and pressed his lips to hers. The other, the metal hand, rested just below her ear while his thumb caressed her cheek. She didn't even notice a difference; its touch was as careful and gentle as all the others.

As their breaths mingled, the heat of their embrace grew with each passing second. Before Alex knew it, Bucky was lifting her into his arms. She wrapped her legs around his waist, her hands gripping at the muscles of his back as he led them back to his bedroom. Their mouths never parted, not until Bucky laid her gently down onto the bed. He climbed over her, his frame huge compared to hers. That's when he hesitated and his expression became strained.

Alex studied him with concern. "What's wrong?"

Bucky shook his head, not knowing where to start. "It's just that I...it's been so long..."

There was embarrassment in his eyes as he looked at her. Alex could see his internal struggle, and she wanted to comfort him. "There's nothing you could do to make me regret being here right now" she told him. "But if you're not ready..."

"No, I _am_, I just...I want you to be sure, too." He exhaled the breath he was subconsciously holding. "I never want to pressure-"

Alex pulled him the rest of the way onto the bed, silencing him with her mouth. Whatever was left of Bucky's statement came out as a muffled moan as Alex's hungry tongue found his. His groin tightened as his arousal grew, his hands sinking deep into her dark hair. He fought the urge to pull on it as her mouth trailed down the center of his neck, firing all nerve endings. Alex began to unbutton his shirt, peeling it back from his chest as her mouth moved downwards, kissing his muscles one by one as they were revealed to her.

For a moment, Alex paused to simply admire the man hovering above her. Every inch of his body was evidence of the kind of warrior he was, but his eyes deceived him. They always would, especially when he stared at her the way he was staring now.

"I don't think I've ever told you this..." Alex placed a kiss at the hollow of his throat. "...but you're fucking sexy."

A low chuckle rumbled from Bucky's chest. The devilish smirk he wore was that of a fighter's when they know their opponent's about to succumb. With more force than Alex was prepared for, Bucky gripped her hands in his and locked them above her head.

"Don't try and move."

A soldier's order.

Alex bit her lip as Bucky's mouth trailed down to her collarbone, then to the space between her breasts. Here he paused, his eyes meeting hers as he drug his tongue along the skin at the edge of her dress.

"This is gonna have to go."

"By all means" Alex murmured. She watched with a lustful gaze as he slid the hem of her dress upwards, his mouth dragging lazily along the inside of her thighs. When he got to her panties, he looked up at her with a grin.

"Lace, huh?"

"You like?"

"Mmmm..."

It was a throaty moan, one of approval that hummed against her skin and making her wetter than she already was. What Bucky didn't know was how long it had been for _her _as well. She figured he knew this, given her cursed touch, but it was never more obvious to herself than it was when he slid her panties down her legs.

"Seems I'm not the only one enjoying this." He voice flared with pride, the heat of his mouth so close to her Alex thought she might explode.

When he took that first lick, her entire body shuddered. When he took several more, each one moving closer to her most sensitive spot, Alex lost all sense of consciousness. She was locked in his hands wrapped around her legs and willingly pinned by his command. His mouth worked her slowly, drawing moans from her that made his own head spin. She reached down and sunk her fingers in his hair, giving him the reassurance he craved.

When Bucky brought her just to the brink, he lifted his gaze and their eyes met. Alex saw him smirk as he lapped at her core, and it drove her over the edge. Her back arched, pushing herself onto his unrelenting tongue even more.

Not until she was satisfied and her body had gone slack did Bucky even climb up next to her. Alex found his mouth and sluggishly kissed him, still high from her orgasm. She could taste herself on his mouth and it turned her on all over again. "How did you learn this in the 40s" she breathed between kisses.

He chuckled. "I didn't." Lust was heavy in his voice as his mouth planted soft kisses down her neck. "Was just reading your cues, doll. And there were plenty of them."

Alex felt herself drunkenly smile, her head still swimming from the lingering feel of his tongue between her legs. His hands were roaming her body now, getting acquainted with all the other places he planned on giving his attention. A piece of her felt guilty that Bucky was doing all the work, but he was clearly enjoying it.

There was still one thing Alex wanted; one thing she wanted to be greedy about. She reached down and palmed the growing thickness in Bucky's pants, squeezing just enough to garner a moan from him. "These are gonna have to go." She tugged at the waist of his pants.

"Say please."

"_Please_," she whimpered.

Bucky's dick throbbed so hard it hurt. He had his pants off in no time, while Alex removed her dress and bra beneath. His eyes were caught by the perfection of her body; her soft breasts, the flat pane of her stomach, her hair draped around her. Her lips were puffy from their kissing, with a little bit of stubble burn donning her chin. Her raw beauty took the air from his lungs, but it also made his possessive side flare. He wanted to ravage every part of her; leaving his mark so no one could have her the way he wanted her.

Alex saw the hungry look in his eyes and sat up on her elbows. "What are you waiting for, soldier?"

If there was any lingering apprehension in Bucky's mind before, it was gone now. The way Alex bit her bottom lip as her eyes lowered to his waist was enough for him to know she liked what she saw. It may have been a nearly a century since he was last with a woman, but Alex inspired confidence in him.

She cupped her hands behind his neck, pulling him on top of her. As he climbed over her, Bucky took that moment to really look at Alex. He looked down, smoothing her hair away from her face. "You are beyond beautiful, Alexis." A humble grin adorned his handsome face. "Thank you for being you."

"No, James," she whispered, opening her legs to him. "Thank you for being _you._"

Their mouths joined, and so did their bodies. That first thrust drew a gasp from Alex, the thickness of Bucky filling her to the point she had to close her eyes. He went slow, aware of the adjustment needed, and waited until Alex nodded for him to increase his speed. Bucky watched her the entire time, but he soon found himself closing his own eyes as the comfort and warmth of Alex's body took over. He lowered his mouth to hers, wanting to connect with her there as he connected with her core.

The weight of Bucky's body towering over Alex was formidable; the plates of his arm shifting with each thrust he delivered. Her hands slid down his back, marveling at the strength within him. From his powerful legs to the ripple of his abs to the bulking shoulders that hovered above her, Alex drank it all in. Every part of Bucky was bred to be a fighter and it showed.

Something must have given her desire away, because Bucky responded by gripping her waist and pushing himself deeper inside her. The intensity of his metal grip sent shock waves through Alex's body. She wanted more of that power. She arched her back, meeting him stroke for stroke, opening her throat to his mouth. Gentle, rolling thrusts turned harder as their breathing increased. Bucky gripped at her thigh, lifting her leg to get that extra inch of himself deep inside her as he drove himself deeper. He was claiming her as his own; marking her in ways she'd never forget. Alex moaned his name, pleading for more, and he delivered every inch.

As he released from Alex's mouth, Bucky rested his forehead against hers. Their eyes met as their bodies rocked together, unspoken words passing between them. The intense color of blue within Bucky's eyes showed the fire he felt inside him in those moments. Alex felt it too; her powers were steadily awakening to the sensations of their lovemaking. It pulsed through her entire body, heightening the already staggering feel of Bucky's body against hers. She felt herself let go of any remaining resolve within her, and a faint white light began to cover her. Bucky watched as the white light enveloped her gorgeous body, and then it began to do the same to his.

He looked at her through hair that had fallen over his brow. "Alex..."

"It's okay, I promise" she said, clutching at his arms. "Don't stop."

Bucky trusted her, but he nearly lost himself in the sensation of her powers. He loosed a sharp breath as he felt her body grip him, trembling inside her warmth as every sensation heightened to a new level. With his hands braced on either side of Alex's head, he clenched the fist of his metal arm, gritting his teeth as every point in his body sparked with desire. Her power filled him, taking nothing and giving everything. His arm clamped onto the bed, locking a fist of his own bed sheets between metal fingers.

"_Fuck, Alex"_he groaned, losing himself to the incredible feeling of her body.

"Don't stop." Her pleas came as tiny, whimpering moans. "Don't stop, James."

Bucky closed his eyes and locked the plating of his metal arm. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her, but he could feel his insides reaching a breaking point; a point where the power in his arm threatened to let loose. Reaching up, he closed his metal hand around the frame of his bed until it almost snapped from the force. Still, Alex's powers pulsated through his body, giving him pleasure he never knew could possibly exist.

_"Alex_ ..." He bit his lip, gritting his teeth. "You feel so good, baby... _too _good..."

"_Let go, then" _she told him.

So Bucky did.

Alex ground her hips against his, the level and length of Bucky's arousal pumping into her brutally. She wanted what was left of him, drawing it from him with her body, feeling her powers thrumming all around them. Bucky could hold on no longer, and the level of his release rocked them both. He let out a feral groan as he felt himself spill inside her. Above them, his metal hand completely snapped the bed frame. The shimmering light around them exploded into a white blast, the same as it had the first day they put their hands on one another. This time, the eruption didn't separate them, but connected them deeper than their bodies.

If anyone had been outside of Bucky's apartment, they would have seen white light spilling forth around the doorframe, turning the dark hallway bright for just a second.

As their bodies slowed and their breathing returned to normal, Alex looked up into Bucky's love drunk eyes. She eyed his gorgeous face, his throat she'd left a mark on, and his body covered in a light sheen of sweat. The plates of his arm shifted as he brought his hand back to her face, the gentleness of its touch a complete contrast to what it had just done to the bed frame.

"Sorry about that." Bucky's mouth lifted into a guilty smirk. "I can get a little carried away."

Alex giggled; a full on, breathy, girlish giggle. She cupped his head in her hands, her fingers sinking into his hair once more. "I'm not the one who's gonna have to explain that to Stark."

Bucky laughed, his face scrunching the way Alex had grown to love.

Their lips met. Slowly, familiarly. A silent thank you, and perhaps more. Bucky felt it, Alex felt it. Neither said it.

Neither had to.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For an added bonus: if you'd like to take a listen to the song I chose for Bucky and Alex's dance, please visit here: 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XK9Q3OF3mY
> 
> It's short, but it will transport you to their dance if you close your eyes :)
> 
> Artist: Margaret Whiting.  
Song Title: I've Never Been in Love Before  
Disclaimer: I do not own the song.
> 
> Enjoy!


	8. Chapter 8

"Mission report, Sergeant Barnes?" 

Bucky stretched sleepily, his smile appearing. "Mission successful. Happiest man alive." 

Alex felt his arms tighten around her from behind. Bucky nuzzled his head in the crook of her neck and a tiny shiver crawled across her skin. "Can confirm female subject is also experiencing abnormal levels of happiness." 

He placed a single kiss on her neck. "Female subject secured in arms. Escape is futile." 

"Consider me a willing prisoner, then." She turned her head and their lips melded together in a slow embrace. 

With a content sigh, Alex relaxed into Bucky's arms. With her body swallowed up by his own, Bucky was the perfect Big Spoon. His arms hugged her tight against him, leaving her feeling safe and protected and thoroughly satisfied. Never mind the dull pressure that still lingered between her legs from their love-making. If anything, it only reinforced her feelings. 

"I was surprised last night to see you had a tattoo" Bucky mentioned, pulling Alex from her thoughts. 

"Got it in high school." She smiled faintly at the memory. "A present to myself when I graduated." 

Bucky traced a finger along the colorful ink, causing goosebumps to form on her skin. "What made you want one?" 

For a moment, Alex thought he may not have liked it. Tattoos, especially on women, weren't exactly something from his day and age that garnered approval. She hoped he was only being genuinely curious. "I wanted to feel something. _Anything_. I was always holding back, not touching anyone for fear of reading their thoughts or taking on their personality traits, so...I went with the next likely route: a big sharp needle over several sessions." 

As if sensing her worrisome thoughts, Bucky kissed her shoulder. "Do the patterns mean anything?" 

"They're fashioned after Grecian _meandros_, all melding into one." Alex opened her arm, exposing the inside of her bicep. "And they all meet here, forming the names of my family." 

Bucky couldn't believe he'd missed this detail. He could read and speak fluent Greek (another useful leftover from his dark past), so he very plainly saw the names of Alex's mother, father, and sister. "That's sweet" he said, planting another tiny kiss on her bicep. "A way to carry them with you wherever you go." 

Alex nodded, not at all surprised he understood. She rolled onto her back so she could see him better and take in what a true vision he was in the morning. His hair was slightly mussed from sleep, as well as their additional round of love-making. The bit of stubble that lined his mouth and jaw were much darker now, which she loved. "You truly are adorable" she said, fingering the slight cleft of his chin. 

"I thought I was sexy?" 

"Oh you're that, too. Don't worry." She held him by the jaw and kissed him. "You can be both." 

The comfort level Bucky achieved with Alex was growing. Being intimate with her had allowed him to push past a part of himself that he'd been holding back for so long. He was afraid of so much in this phase in his life, especially following his recovery. He was skeptical of so many things, but mostly of himself and how to handle new situations. All that he was working on prior to meeting Alex seemed to come so much easier whenever he was with her. 

"Hey, you." Alex tapped his forehead. "Whatchya thinking in there?" 

He flopped back on the pillow with an exhale. "Well, two things..." 

"Let's hear 'em." Alex sat up attentively. Her fingers lazily trailed over his bare abdomen, admiring the peaks and valleys of muscle as he talked. 

"For starters, I'm thinking about last night." He eyed her, happy to see a smile forming on her face. "And two, I'm thinking about food." 

"Of course you are!" 

"Aren't you?!" 

"...maybe." 

Bucky clicked his tongue. "Female subject is being difficult. May need to be detained." 

"Detention may lead to starvation, just remember" she sassed. 

With a laugh, Bucky pulled her onto his chest, ruffling her hair as she squealed in playful protest. It ended with them wrestling in one another's arms until Alex had to give. It was obvious why, even though Bucky tried to go easy on her. 

"Whaddya say we get out of here?" he said, slightly out of breath. "Let's go the city. We'll find someplace quiet, stuff ourselves, then go for a drive." 

Alex exhaled a puff of air, blowing the hair away from her face. "A drive you say?" She nearly jumped off the bed with excitement. "That sounds exactly like my kind of morning." 

A full-teeth grin lit up Bucky's face. "I hope you like motorcycles?" 

"You have a _motorcycle?_" Alex's jaw dropped. As if the man in front of her could get any more perfect. 

When she burst into the happiest laugh Bucky had ever heard, he knew he had his answer. 

* * *

Alex closed her eyes and smiled. The rumble between her legs, the wind against her face, the firm body wrapped in her arms; it was something she would never forget. Sitting behind Bucky with her arms clutched tight about his waist, she never felt freer. At one point, she may have even laughed out loud for no other reason than the sheer joy of being out for a ride with someone who she actually could hold on to. Someone who actually understood her. 

Bucky had heard Alex laugh, which brought a smile to his face. He revved the engine, feeling liberated and spontaneous. When he felt the arms around his waist tighten, his smile grew even larger. 

They wound through the forested roads leading out from Avengers Headquarters, which soon gave way to more urban highways. It was a chilly morning but the sun was bright and brought a welcomed warmth. Alex wore Bucky's leather jacket which she pulled from her apartment before they left, and Bucky simply wore his hood. Their helmets had two-way communication ability, but neither felt the need to speak during their ride. Their shared feeling of freedom was the loudest thing between them. 

As they approached the city, Bucky used alleyways and short-cuts Alex had no idea even existed. Her curiosity grew as she began to see different parts of the city she wasn't used to seeing, wondering what Bucky had in mind for their chosen stop. The tall buildings flew by one by one, lowering in stature as skyscrapers became shorter offices and shops. Finally, their trip came to an end when Bucky wheeled the motorcycle up to the front of a small cafe. 

He threw the kickstand down and looked back at Alex. "How was it?" 

"As if you even need to ask!" She hopped off the bike, shaking her hair out of the helmet. "It was amazing." When Bucky removed his helmet, she couldn't help but reach up and try and smooth down the mess that had become his dark hair. 

Bucky looked at her sheepishly. "That bad, huh?" 

"I kind of like it. All wind-blown and handsome. It fits you." 

He pushed a piece of it behind his ear, feeling humbled. "If you say so." It was still so weird for him to hear Alex voice her attraction to him. Sure, their sex was out of this world and through it, she proved over and over again just how attracted she actually wasto him, but hearing it...seeing it in the way she gazed at him...the light in her eyes every time she listened to him talk. It was all still so crazy and new to him. 

Taking her hand, Bucky led Alex through the front door of the cafe. Alex's first impression was a good one: it was a cozy little nook of a place. It smelled of fresh bread and ground coffee which evoked a sense of comfort just walking through the front door. There were a few patrons dotted here and there, most with their earbuds in and working on laptops. An elderly woman sat behind the front counter on a stool, idly flipping through a newspaper. When Alex and Bucky entered, she looked up from her paper with a smile. 

"Goooooood morning!" Her greeting came out almost like a song. 

Bucky gave her a nod. "Morning, ma'am." Out of habit, he glanced around the cafe and sized up everyone that was present. He knew there weren't any threats, but some habits were hard to break. 

They chose a table for two in the back of the cafe, away from the other patrons. They removed their jackets and settled in, but Bucky kept his leather driving gloves on. He still found it uncomfortable to be out in public with any part of his metal arm exposed, but it seemed Alex understood all too well. He could tell by the compassionate look in her eyes. 

After ordering coffee and sharing a cinnamon roll the size of both their heads, Bucky and Alex talked for nearly an hour. Some patrons left, others arrived, but Bucky and Alex were in a world all their own in the back of the cafe. They both felt much more normal outside of the Avengers compound. Not just normal human beings, but a normal couple as well. Their discussions didn't involve anything about the pending mission that might come up, or about any past missions, or anything that involved their work. It was refreshing to still get to know the person across the table, and with every passing moment the pair fell deeper for each other. 

The nice lady from behind the counter came to check on them, asking if they wanted refills or another pastry. They regretfully turned down the pastry, but gladly accepted a refill. 

"So what made you choose this place?" Alex asked, adding more cream to her coffee. 

Bucky facially shrugged. "It's a place I found one day when I couldn't take another minute inside Headquarters. I jumped on my bike and pointed it towards the city, no real destination in mind. When I saw it, it looked like some place familiar to me." He glanced over his shoulder at the warm interior of the cafe. "I don't know. Maybe I've been here, maybe I haven't. Or maybe it reminds me of something closer to home. I can never really tell. But...it's quiet, and it's different than back at the compound, so it was a good fit." He took a drink of the coffee. "Been coming here ever since." 

"I think it's perfect. Thanks for introducing it to me." She nudged his calf with her boot beneath the table. "Although I'm curious...have you ever gone back to your old home? The place from your dog tags?" 

"It's funny you ask" Bucky admitted timidly. "I've considered doing it so many times that I lost count. I've always been too afraid of what I might find if I went back. I have these fears that I'll get angry, or sad, or both - and lose control because it's too much." 

It saddened Alex to hear this, but she wasn't surprised. "Maybe if you and I are successful with future trial runs, we could go back there together? Maybe then you'll recognize something. And hey, if not? I'll be there with you regardless, no matter what happens." 

Her assurance was enough to fill Bucky with appreciation. Alex was beautiful for so many reasons, and not all because of her physical features, though he had every reason to admire Alex that morning. Even doing something as simple as sitting across from him at the table, not a stitch of makeup on, with her confident smile playing at the lips he'd ravaged last night, she was stunning. If he really let his mind wander, he could still feel the warm, snug fit of her body. Or the way her mouth wrapped around his length when they'd gone a second round later in the night. 

But beyond all those things, Alex inspired him to _feel _more. Little by little, she was bringing him out of the shell he'd been in, exposing him to emotions he'd been afraid to feel. Most of all, she made him feel safe in the process. 

Alex cocked her head, her dark hair falling over her shoulder. "You're smiling..." 

"Mmm hmm." 

"Any reason?" 

"Who says I need one?" Now Bucky was the one to nudge Alex under the table. "You just make me happy, is all." 

It was at that moment that both of their cell phones buzzed, drawing their attention away from one another. They pulled their phones out in unison and read the text message that was sent to both of them: 

_ Steve Rogers: More details are in regarding the facility in Thimphu. Mission assignment likely to follow. Meet in conference room at 1200 hours to discuss. Full Avenger attendance required. See you then. _

"Guess our peaceful morning's over" Bucky uttered dismally. 

Alex had already stood. "Guess so." She slipped the leather jacket over her shoulders, then gave Bucky's arm a squeeze. "At least we had this time together." She could see the disappointment written on his face, but she refused to let it get to him. "C'mon, soldier. We still have one more awesome ride to take before we get back to work." 

Again, her smile was a comfort to Bucky. He stood, and his hand took its place inside hers once more. "Thanks, doll." 

Their lips met briefly before they headed out of the cafe. 

The elderly woman behind the counter watched them leave, a subtle smile on her face. She'd seen the young man before; polite and handsome, with eyes like steel and a missing smile. She'd never seen him with anyone else, let alone someone who made his entire demeanor change. Whoever the young woman was that was with him, she was good for him. She didn't know much, but she knew that with all her heart. 

* * *

When Alex and Bucky arrived back at the compound, they split up and retreated back to their respective apartments to change. When they reconvened, it was inside the Avengers conference room. Plenty of bodies were already there, engaging in small talk as they waited for things to begin. Alex entered the room to a few casual hellos, and one strong side-eye from Sam. 

"Hiya Sam." She took a seat near him, giving him a second look when she realized he was staring at her. He had that look in his eyes like he knew something she didn't. "How are you?" she asked, wondering if he was staring in hopes of her asking. 

"Good, how are _you?!_" 

Bucky entered the conference room, using his large frame to separate the two of them as they stared at one another. "Don't you have someone else to bother this morning?" he quipped, taking a seat between them. 

Sam leaned back in his chair with a laugh. "Oh here we go. Not even a _hello_ and you're already on my ass." 

A few others gathered into the room, Tony bringing up the rear. When everyone was seated, he slapped a newspaper down on the table. "Yesterday's headlines out of Bhutan: thousands of fish dead. Belly up. No explanation." He tossed another paper on the stack. "Today's headlines: hundreds sick. Rashes covering their bodies leaving marks as if they were burned. Cause unknown." Folding his arms over his chest, he looked at the group resolutely. "It can't be a coincidence." 

Alex chewed on the end of a pen as she contemplated what was being presented. Natasha swiveled in her chair to face the bulk of the group. 

"Hydra's been known to dabble in these parts" she told them. "I've had run-ins with them along the border of Nepal and Kazakhstan. They love to hide in the mountains." 

Bucky raised a finger. "I can confirm Romanoff's observations. If these instances are anything like..." A muscle in his jaw tensed. "...like they were ten years ago, then they're testing their latest batch on the locals in Thimphu." 

His eyes shifted to Alex. She could read what was left unspoken in the turbulent colors of his eyes. He seemed years older than he was just an hour or so ago when they were together at the cafe. She supposed any lingering afterglow of their night together was now totally gone. 

Natasha was nodding in agreement with Bucky. "They choose these remote locations on purpose in hopes that what they're doing will go unnoticed. If what S.H.I.E.L.D. is reporting is true, then I say we go." 

"_If _we go, there's far more at stake to us," Steve told the group. "Thimphu is the capital city, with most of Bhutan's population located there. If we're sloppy, there'll be consequences. Civilian casualty will be a much larger concern here if we decide to invade." 

"It's also largely spiritual, with Buddhist monasteries we'll have to be careful of" Natasha added. "If I recall correctly, I believe they hold a ceremony of some kind every fall?" 

Tony, who was pacing as he usually did during such discussions, halted. "Jarvis?" 

"_Would you like me to look up the ceremony, sir?"_

_"_ You got it." 

They waited for all of two seconds before Jarvis located the information. 

_ "It appears as though there is a ceremony held annually on October 10th, loosely defined as the Cham Dance Ceremony, honoring Buddhist traditions. Masks, costumes, dancing and-" _

_"_ That'll do." 

"_My pleasure, sir."_

Tony looked at the others. "October 10th." He raised his eyebrows. 

"Five days from now." Steve sounded reluctant. "Not a lot of time to make a plan." 

"We could go in when the festival's taking place." Tony spread his hands on the table, leaning over it. "Assuming everyone's in the town square or wherever the hell this is held, they'll be isolated without them evening knowing it. We'll have to be more careful, sure, but we can make this work." 

Several sets of eyes looked at one another around the room. Alex chewed on the pen, wondering what the hesitation was for. As far as she was concerned, she was ready to go. And she wasn't alone. 

"I say we go" Nat repeated. "We can't let them keep testing whatever it is they're making on these people." 

"If anything, they might use the festival as one _big _test bed" Alex offered. She saw both Tony and Steve, along with many others, turn to face her. 

The faintest smile appeared on Steve's face. "You may be right, Markos." His eyes flicked briefly to Bucky, then back to Tony. "What if that is actually Hydra's plan?" 

"Then we don't have five days at all" Tony finished. "We have under 48 hours to get plan together, and another 24 to get our asses over there and figure out just what the hell they're making in that facility. Then we'll spend the rest of our time making them regret every second they spent on it." 

* * *

"48 hours" Alex repeated, flopping back onto her bed with a sigh. "Hopefully S.H.I.E.L.D can get it all together in that amount of time." 

Bucky flopped down next to her, his weight causing the bed to shake. "This is what they do. They'll get a plan together in no time." He rolled his head to the side and gave Alex a smile. "The real question is, how do we spend the next 48 hours?" 

Alex caught a glimmer in his eye and laughed. "_Someone's _got a one track mind all of a sudden." She rolled over so she was on top of him, straddling the width of his torso. "Good thing you're not the only one." 

Their mouths met passionately, and Alex felt Bucky's hands strengthen their grip on her hips. She also felt that same grip loosen halfway through their embrace in a moment of hesitation. She pulled away to find him looking up at her apologetically. 

"Remember what I said in the conference room earlier?" He cupped her face with love in his touch. "About what I saw ten years ago?" 

She nodded. 

"I _did _those things." Sadness clouded his features. "What if we go back there and I see something? Something that I contributed to?" 

Alex placed her hands on his, which remained on the sides of her face. "I'll be there with you. Even if I'm not right next to you, I won't be far. You're on the good side now, babe. Not because you were brainwashed, but because it's your choice." With this, she rolled onto her side next to him. "Why don't we do another trial run?" 

Fear entered Bucky's eyes. "I can't let you go through all that before a mission." 

"Now is the best time," she argued. "It might help. I may be better at it, too. Besides...we know it gets better not many hours after." 

Bucky exhaled heavily. He didn't want to hurt Alex, even if it was her choice. He hated seeing her sore and sick and torn up over whatever she saw inside his mind. "I'm not sure I'm worth any of it" he told her, his voice lowering. When his eyes met hers, he knew she'd already made her mind up. She got into a sitting position in front of him, her expression turning serious. 

"Sit up, please." 

He did. 

Alex took his face in her hands. "James Buchanan Barnes, you are _worth it_. Do you hear me? _You are worth it to me._" 

He looked down, but she held his face tighter, forcing his gaze back up. 

"We're doing this as a team, remember? You help me. I help you." 

The corner of Bucky's mouth quirked upward. "Best team ever." 

"Best fucking team ever" Alex repeated. She rested her forehead against his. "You're worth it to me, James. Never forget that." 

He closed his eyes and breathed her in, her words a remedy for his aching heart. "I won't forget." He leaned into her kiss, the comfort of her lips taking away the guilt of past hurts. 

"So whaddya say?" Her forehead remained against his, but a smile adorned her mouth. 

Bucky matched her smile with his own. "I say let's do it." 

They worked together to clear a space in the middle of the apartment. They met in the center of the living room and sat cross-legged opposite one another with their knees touching. Alex closed her eyes and focused on her powers, bringing them to life. She lifted her palms and Bucky leaned in to her touch. He closed his eyes and tried to relax. Soon enough, he felt the initial warmth of Alex's power enter his body. 

Alex immediately found herself in a barrage of memories and emotions. She pushed through them, inching past Bucky's talents, past a whirlwind of various emotions, digging down deep into the core of his being where the true darkness lay. She began to feel the rise of her powers, and with it, that teetering edge of control. She ground her teeth and focused, pushing further past what her power wanted to cling to and what she needed it to move toward. 

_A dark room. Artificial lighting. A metal chair. Curved plates._

Alex felt a cold sweat form upon seeing the room. There was something ominous about it, as though it held secrets no one should ever know. 

_ It was cold. Damp. Something dripped nearby, making the floor slippery. The chair loomed in the middle of the room. Pain happened there. _

Alex moved toward the source of that pain and began to pull the memory from Bucky. 

_ A high-pitched wail. Shrieks of pain. Heavy breathing echoing off cold walls. More agonizing shrieks. _

Alex began to tremble all over again. She felt Bucky's hands go to hers, so she pushed onward. 

_ A cage. Tasers. Forced obedience. Injections. The steady drip of water. Agony. _

Layer by layer, Alex continued to remove what she saw, feeling her resolve waver but she held on. Her breathing increased, her stomach began to tighten, but she held on. 

_Abandonment. Dread. Suffering. Numbness._

Alex locked on to each emotion with her powers. With a final effort, she lifted the layers with her, pulling them from Bucky with such force that when she made the removal, her entire body shot backwards. It happened so fast that her head hit the floor. 

It took only a second for Bucky to come to, but when he did, he could already feel a difference inside. When he saw Alex lying across from him and moaning in pain, fear moved him to his knees. "_Shit_, he breathed, gently helping her into an upright position. She winced at the movement, but he cradled her head with care. "Are you alright?!" 

Of all things, Alex grinned, albeit incoherently. " _I think I did it_..." 

"You _did_ do it" Bucky said, pride in his tone. 

"No puking, either..." 

"No puking." Bucky smiled. "Although you keep finding different ways to hurt yourself whenever we do this." 

With a shaky arm, Alex reached up and tried to find the swelling that was forming on the back of her head, but Bucky gently lowered her hand away. 

"Ah ah. Don't touch it just yet." 

"How bad is it?" 

"It's a goose egg, alright...but nothing more." 

Frustrated, Alex sighed. "One of these times, I swear you won't have to take care of me afterwards." 

Bucky thought about telling Alex that he'd decided a long time ago, back on Comoros Island, that he would do whatever he could to protect her. Whether that meant during a mission, in battle, or one-on-one when they were together. Whatever came up, he would defend her and do whatever was humanly possible to protect her. 

Neither realized that this very promise would be tested on their mission in Thimphu. 


	9. Chapter 9

It wasn't even daybreak when Alexis heard her cell phone vibrating on the bedside table. The sequence of rumbles was annoying enough that she reached over and silenced the phone without even looking, then buried her head back in the pillow.

"You should get that" Bucky mumbled.

"Whoever it is can at least wait until the sun comes up."

Silence returned, and the pair drifted back to sleep. A few moments later, her phone began to vibrate again.

Bucky couldn't help smiling against his pillow at the sound of Alex's frustrated groan. He opened his eyes, watching as she reached over and grabbed the phone.

"It's Wanda."

"Wanda?!" That surprised even him.

Alex dismissed the text message, then tossed the phone back on the table. "I'm supposed to meet her at the Practice Room by 8."

"8 am!?"

"Yuuup." She snuggled in closer to Bucky until his arm wrapped around her, cuddling her to his chest. "That gives us three more hours of peace."

Bucky's hand went to her hair, his fingers sleepily stroking through its length. "Sounds like you'll be mirroring her skills this mission."

"Could be interesting."

He pressed a kiss to the top of her head in agreement. "How's your bump feel?"

"Better...especially when you play with my hair." She glanced up, happy to see Bucky's broad smile.

They lay there a while longer in silence; Bucky's fingers stroking through her Alex's hair while she thought about the prospect of sharing Wanda's powers. Despite how comfortable she was in Bucky's arms, her thoughts about the mission made her increasingly antsy. When Bucky's fingers drifted down her spine, she felt another part of her become increasingly antsy.

She tried. She really, _really _tried to fall back to sleep.

But her body was wide-awake, and Bucky's hand felt way, _way _too good.

Alex hooked a leg over his body, sliding atop his lap in a straddling position. His blue eyes looked up at her with a sly smile playing at his lips, even as his hands anchored themselves on her hips.

"I can't sleep" she whispered, her open mouth drawing down his neck. She peppered his skin with lazy kisses and began to grind her hips against his.

"That's a shame." Bucky lifted her chin so she was looking at him. "How can I help you with that?"

Alex grinned. It was a shameless grin; one that spoke of her growing need for him. She moved down his torso, kissing each of the muscles of his abs. They clenched when she reached the little trail of hair that led down beneath the bed sheets. Here, she paused for emphasis. "Just let me enjoy you for a while."

The heat of Alex's mouth so dangerously close to Bucky's growing hard-on made all thoughts vanish from his mind. The feel of her silky hair against his skin as she lowered her mouth further and further, going everywhere except exactly where he craved, was the kind of teasing he was powerless against. When he felt the flick of her tongue along the underside of his length, he let out the first of many moans.

Alex couldn't believe the view she had. She counted herself lucky a thousand times over as she gazed down the barrel of Bucky's muscular torso up to his powerful shoulders, then up to his face, watching his mouth slacken from the pleasure she was giving him. For such a skilled assassin and feared super soldier, Alex sure took pride in making him crumble in her hands.

Bucky was utterly torn between watching Alex work his body with her gorgeous mouth or just simply lying back and enjoying every sensation. Sometimes her talent was too much and he _had _to close his eyes, if only to focus on not finishing before he got enough of her. It was a beautifully-strange thing to watch Alex's mouth working between his legs. This wasn't the sort of thing that went on back in his teenage years, at least not with the girls he'd been with. But _now? _He was positive he never wanted anything more than to feel Alex's mouth like he currently was.

The second Alex felt Bucky's hands sink into her hair, she knew she had him. She could feel him trying to be gentle, especially with the recent bump to her head, but he was quickly reaching the ledge of his resistance. She slowed her pace, taking his length in deliberate, full strokes. She saw his eyes open and look at her, and she smiled around his thickness.

"_Fuck_ you're beautiful."

She increased her speed, watching Bucky's eyes snap shut again, then slowed her pace once more. Yes, she was teasing him. _Yes, _she was enjoying it...maybe a little too much. Bucky's jaw clenched hard, the muscles of his neck flexing as he tried to steady his breathing. She heard a groan from deep within his chest, and before Alex even knew what was happening, Bucky had rolled her over onto her stomach with him poised behind her.

"My turn to tease" he growled, his breath hot on her ear.

Alex actually had to bite her lip when she felt Bucky enter her. Her body was more than ready, but his size was still a lot to take. His flesh hand gripped at the softness of Alex's backside, while his metal hand made itself known as it locked on to her shoulder. Bucky leaned over her, his chest flush against her back. Alex could feel the contrast of metal and flesh as his body overwhelmed hers, his biceps blocking her view from anything other than the headboard in front of her. He nipped at her neck, so she leaned into his mouth, exposing more skin for him to taste. His hand slid between her breasts to cup her neck, holding her firmly in place as he took every ounce of her desire.

As Bucky's mouth moved down her spine in hot, ragged breaths, Alex closed her eyes and allowed herself to feel everything. From there on out, all she knew was the strength of his desire and her resultant pleasure. Everything else faded around her.

* * *

Hours later when Alex arrived at the Practice Room, she found not just Wanda there, but Tony and Steve as well. She hadn't expected a crowd, but she approached cheerfully nonetheless. She noticed right away that Wanda had had the same idea in attire as she did. They both wore form-fitting athletic leggings, tank tops, trainers, and both had their hair tied back. In other words: they came prepared to work. Which lent to the notion that Alex likely _was _going to try and mirror Wanda on this next mission.

"Sorry I didn't get back to you right away" Alex told Wanda, giving her a quick hug. "It's already been a busy morning." She caught Steve eyeing her, but she pretended not to notice.

Wanda waved it off. "Just glad you could make it. I know it's a little short notice." She directed her attention towards the men. "It appears we've got a plan for Thimphu."

Alex's hands went to her hips. "Great! Let's hear it. Although, I can probably guess what this part is about."

"Your guess it right" said Steve. "With the guidelines S.H.I.E.L.D. gave us late last night, we think we'll need you to mirror Wanda this go-around."

"But you want me to practice first" Alex finished for him.

"If you agree to that."

"Of course."

Tony stepped up now, glancing between the three of them. "I'm just here to watch because Pepper wanted me out of her hair this morning." He gave a quick smile.

"The more the merrier." Alex rubbed her hands together. "So...where do we begin?"

They began with a transfer. Tony and Steve stood off to the sidelines as Alex placed her hands on Wanda's and closed her eyes. The transfer took place in less than a minute. With that, the lessons began. Wanda taught Alex exactly how much energy to direct into her powers to increase or decrease the amount of manipulation she could use. The practiced varying levels of this on Steve's shield, with Alex increasing and decreasing the flow of Wanda's energy through her hands. She had it down pat in no time.

Watching with a shrewd eye, Tony studied the tenacity at which Alexis tackled the training. She hardly needed any at all, and it seemed to him that Steve had been overly cautious in wanting to bring the women together to practice. In any case, he found the demonstrations fascinating. Alexis was, by all definitions of the word, a true talent. It was exactly like the very first day they assembled here and watched the debut of her power. The way she could handle any supernatural abilities that she transferred into herself made Tony truly curious as to what her exact biological makeup must be like. He'd pay damn good money to get his hands on a droplet of her DNA just to study it.

Alex flawlessly handled another maneuver, the ending of which was complimented by a high-five that she exchanged with Wanda. Steve's smirk showed that he, too, was impressed by the dark-haired phenom. Not something Tony saw every day.

As the women got to work on another exercise, Steve came over to join him. Neither said anything at first, but watched in hushed awe as Alex continued to work with Wanda.

"Remarkable, isn't it?"

"Never seen anything like it," Tony answered, his eyes glued to Alexis. "And that's saying something."

"With two of this kind of power on the mission, we should be able to contain the spread of any biological threat if we run into any issues."

"Are you _expecting _issues, Rogers?"

"Plan for the best. Prepare for the worst."

Tony rubbed the back of his neck. Sometimes Rogers' preparedness really chapped his ass. But as much as Cap's rigidity could bother him, even Tony couldn't argue the potential threats this time. Biological warfare was no joke, and the potential for civilian damage would be high if they didn't cross their T's and dot their I's. Not to mention the potential for any one of their own to become contaminated. He wasn't about to have another Sokovia happen.

Next to him, Steve was holding back a smirk. "Go ahead, Stark. I'm ready for your rebuttal."

"As much as it pains me to break my own streak, I've got no rebuttal this time." He turned and faced Steve with as genuine of a smile as he could muster. "Biological threats scare the shit out of me."

Steve was both impressed and surprised to hear this. He made no motion of acknowledgement as he continued to watch Alexis and Wanda.

Tony also kept his eyes on the women, but lowered his voice. "If whatever Hydra's producing over there is killing rivers full of fish and burning rashes into people's skin with no remedy?" He shook his head in disgust. "We may need more than just two Maximoffs to contain it."

"You think we need additional backup?"

Tony inclined his head. "Wouldn't hurt to have someone in the back pocket."

"Who? Hulk?"

Tony eyed him silently.

Steve exhaled a laugh. "_Thor?!_"

"Plan for the best, prepare for the worst" Tony repeated.

Steve inhaled, doing his best not to roll his eyes. His attention was drawn back to the women as they made their way over to where he and Tony were standing. Judging by their pleased expressions, it appeared the amount of training they had was sufficient.

"Are we that boring, fellas?" Alex joked. "I didn't think you'd lose interest _that _fast."

A smile broke across Steve's face. "Hardly the case, Markos."

"Just planning for the best and preparing for the worst" Tony chided. He gave a tiny bow to the ladies. "If the show's over, I should head to the hangar. I don't trust Happy to make sure everything's in order over there before we leave. If you need me, that's where you'll find me."

The remaining three bid him farewell, then hung around to chat for a while. After, they packed up their belongings and headed out into the hall. As they made their way towards the apartment wing, Wanda was the next to peel off.

"Thanks for meeting again, Alexis" she said with a wave. "See you guys later."

As Wanda disappeared behind the elevator doors, Alex's gaze shifted to Steve. "So are we getting a briefing on what the plan is for all this?"

"Tomorrow morning before we take off" Steve assured her. "Still a few details to iron out yet."

They fell into silence as they walked, their minds wandering off in their own directions. Alex's focus turned to the mission and how she could help by using Wanda's powers. Steve's focus turned to how he could break the ice about her and Bucky.

"So..." His winning smile appeared when he looked at her. There was apprehension in that smile, but also plenty of knowledge.

Alex let out a small laugh. "I know that you know, Rogers."

"Know what?"

"You're both terrible at playing dumb, by the way."

"What!?" His mouth opened in feigned hurt and surprise, but they both fell into a shared laugh.

"Okay, you caught me, but I had to at least try," he admitted, hands lifting in surrender. "Let me just say this: I think it's great. You and Bucky."

Alex was still chuckling as she slowed her gait. She came to a stop in front of him. "May I also say something?"

"Absolutely."

For some, the unwavering attention that came so easily to Steve Rogers may have intimidated others. The steadiness of his gaze, the lines of his unfathomably perfect face that could have been chiseled from marble, all of it _was _intimidating. His posture alone was enough to make Alex feel like she should stand up taller when she was speaking to him. But knowing what she knew, especially after the stories Bucky had told her, all she saw was one big handsome kid who yearned to do the right thing all the time.

With this in mind, the shyness Alex felt when facing Steve alone in the hallway evaporated. "I just wanted to thank you for the record player."

Steve hung his head, a knowing smirk appearing. "He told you, huh?"

Alex nodded. "It was a good move, I gotta say. So...thank you for lending it to him."

"Did it, uhh..." He lifted an eyebrow. "...did it work?"

Alex nodded again, and Steve began to laugh. She couldn't help but feel good at his reaction. "It was a good night" she told him. "In fact, it was one of the nicest dates I've ever been on."

"Buck was always the charmer." There was a far away look in Steve's eyes when he said this. "Not to say he isn't _genuine_-"

"-I know what you meant," Alex said with a chuckle.

"You know, back before the war, he was always the one trying to get _me _to loosen up a little?"

Alex pretended to be shocked. "I would have never guessed." She nudged him in the side, eliciting a guilty grin.

"Sad but true" Steve admitted. "It always came so naturally to him. Now, he's asking me to borrow my records and wondering if he's wearing the right shirt for a date." He shook his head wistfully.

Alex could almost picture it. A part of her wished she could have seen it for herself. "You two have a friendship I've been envious of my entire life. It's really nice that, after everything, you both have one another."

"It didn't come easy." Steve shoved his hands in his pockets and looked down. "You know, he doesn't open up a lot anymore, and when he does, it isn't with just anyone. Not since..."

Alex didn't need him to finish. "I know. Trust me, I know."

They looked at one another and shared a moment where they both had Bucky in their minds. Steve had so much of Bucky's past; he had all the memories, all the knowledge of where he came from, who he was before the war, and the struggles that happened thereafter. For Alex, she had the intimate moments with Bucky; the moments of vulnerability, of unbridled desire, of fears and apprehensions and promises of better things to come. Steve and Alex were the bookends to Bucky's ever-growing story, and they came to realize this as they walked along the hallway together.

"Just be careful with him." Steve chanced a look at Alex. "With his emotions, especially."

"I will," she told him. It was the request of a brother, not just a best friend, and Alex took it to heart. She wished she could tell Steve that she was doing everything in her personal power, literally and figuratively, to do the very thing he was asking.

She withheld it for the time being, and as they parted ways for the afternoon, Alex came to understand a little more about Steve and Bucky's friendship. If what just happened was Steve giving her his blessing, then she wouldn't waste it. She'd show him through her actions that her growing bond with Bucky was something that meant more to her than the Captain may have realized.

* * *

In the quiet of his apartment, Bucky sat at his desk and worked on his prosthetic arm. He had a few tools spread out in front of him, most of which were used for everyday upkeep. One by one he reinforced each of the plates of his arm, ensuring any weak spots were remedied.

Nearing completion, Bucky held his arm out in front of him and studied the fluidity of his artificial joints. All in all, everything looked good. He didn't want to take any chances ahead of their mission, so he spent the better part of his evening cleaning and fortifying his gear, which included his arm.

With the prep work was finished, Bucky turned to his next task. It had been a few nights since he last gave his journal some attention, so he made his new entry a long one:

_ Feeling the happiest I've felt since recovery.   
_ _ Fear of losing this feeling has begun to creep in, but trying to stay level-headed.   
_ _ Memories seem to come easier. Emotions are easier to handle.   
_ _ Trying to stick to the basics. Trust my gut. Some habits die hard, though. _  


The light of his desk lamp illuminated the words he wrote. There were still so many things he wanted to express, yet he was so unsure of how to word any of them.

_ My girl seems happy, which I aim to maintain.   
_ _ I guess I can call her my girl now?   
_ _ Still not used to having someone like her in my life.   
_ _ No one has ever looked at me the way she looks at me.   
_ _ It's foreign to me. Sometimes I think it's a joke.   
_ _Just have to keep reminding myself I'm worth it._

Bucky felt it was important to end on that note. He closed the notebook and glanced at his watch, seeing it was already later than he'd expected. The following morning they were setting off for Bhutan and a mission that could last several days. Both he and Alex agreed they needed as much sleep as they could get, which also meant they would need to sleep in separate beds. This would at least prevent any distractions, be it ones they wanted or ones they didn't.

Climbing into bed, Bucky switched the lamp off and let the darkness of night surround him. He stretched out on his back with his hands behind his head and listened to the rain pattering against the window. His thoughts wandered, but he tried to keep them on the sound of the rain. It was a detail he wasn't used to focusing on, but he was finding it easier to do these days. Recognizing this made him smile.

He fell asleep with a hint of that smile still lingering on his face.

* * *

It was hours before sunrise when Alex awoke. Thoughts about the mission combined with the low hum of her powers awakening in anticipation had roused her out of sleep long before her alarm went off. As such, she made herself busy.

After a quick breakfast and a shower, she donned her suit and fitted herself with her various guns and knives in all the appropriate holsters. She stood in front of her mirror and took a moment to truly look at herself. The reflection staring back at her was that of a lethal predator; sleek black hair, sleek black suit, weapons only the most skilled would wield, and the eyes of a hunter. She was ready for this mission. She was ready to hurt the people that hurt countless others.

Not long after, Bucky joined her in her apartment, ready to walk with her down to the hangar. It was still such a shock for Alex to see him in his full uniform. He took on such a total transformation whenever he was outfitted in his assassin gear that it left her wondering if they were even the same person. But when Bucky saw her, and the corner of mouth lifted in that way that left her heart stammering, it wasn't hard to see the softer version of himself was still there.

He leaned in and kissed her, the sound of leather and metal accenting his movements. "How's your head?"

"Can hardly feel anything," she said with a smile.

With a gloved hand, Bucky cupped the base of her neck and gave it a squeeze. "Glad to hear it." He pulled Alex in closer, their belted weapons the only thing keeping them from being flush against one another. Their mouths joined, hungry for one another after a night of reprieve.

Bucky brushed his thumb against Alex's cheek. "You all set?"

"As I'll ever be," she said, giving him a final peck.

They grabbed their duffel bags full of weapons and ammunition and made the trek down to the hangar. They joined the others who began to filter in, helping them to load hard-sided trunks of gear onto the Quinjet.

An hour later, the Avengers attended a briefing where they received their final instructions before take-off. Everyone knew their role, and everyone agreed to the risks that role would entail. Once in the air, the Avengers studied maps and went over the finer details of how their plan would play out. All in all, it seemed straightforward.

But it wouldn't be.


	10. Chapter 10

Bhutan's valley settlements, which included the city of Thimphu, was mostly lush, rolling countryside dotted with buildings fashioned in 17th century _dzong _architecture common in Buddhist countries. Hydra's facility was held in one such _dzong-_styled building, composed of several stories made of white brick and stone and sloped gold roofs. The facility itself resembled more of a ancient fortress, complete with courtyards and tall stone walls keeping their secrets concealed within. Anyone else looking at the facility would assume it was a religious manor. For Hydra, it was a brilliant disguise.

Once the Avengers landed at the designated safe area secured by S.H.I.E.L.D, they traveled via armored vans into the city in two separate groups. The first group consisted of Steve, Bucky, Sam, and Alex, and were tasked with infiltrating the alleged Hydra facility. The second group consisted of Natasha, Tony, Clint, and Wanda, and were tasked with monitoring Thimphu's city square where the Cham Dance ceremony was taking place. Alex and Wanda were separated in the event that a biological weapon spill could occur in both locations. Having one of each with their powers in both places could help prevent the spread of the bio weapon should it come to that.

When the vans came to a fork in the road, Alex watched as the second peeled away to head into town. She wished them a silent good luck. Her eyes moved to those across from her, settling first on Bucky. His gaze was focused and hard; evidence of his level of pre-combat intensity. Steve sat alongside him, tightening the straps of his shield and double-checking his earpiece. Beside her sat Sam, looking calm and collected. She wondered if she was the only one whose heart was racing. She tried to focus her nervous energy on the hum of her powers, feeling Wanda's energy flickering in the palms of her hands. It was if it lay in waiting; ready to pounce whenever she called upon it.

It was another twenty minutes before they arrived at the facility. It was just as the Comoros facility was: hidden away, miles from the city's outskirts, and was strangely well lit for as large as it was.

Steve knelt before them, his finger to his wrist comm. "Sync'ing channels in 5, 4, 3, 2..."

The four of them synced their devices to his. It was then that Sam rolled down his window and released Redwing, his remote scanning drone. They waited for the small birdlike device to fly ahead, scan the perimeter of the facility, and send back a transmission.

"Looks like four stories" Sam replied, staring down at his electronic vambrace. "Heat signatures on all. Heli pad out back. Electronic gate system beneath the stone walls."

"We'll split up" Steve said. "Buck and I will take the top two floors. Alex, Sam: you take the bottom two."

Bucky's eyes met Alex's. He gave the faintest of nods, the look in his eyes telling her to be careful. Alex hoped he could read the same sentiment in her own gaze.

The lights of the facility could now be seen through the windows of the van, so the four of them got in position. When the driver hit the breaks and slid to an angled stop before the facility's gates, Steve burst through the doors of the van with the others close behind.

Phase One of the Thimphu mission was about to begin.

* * *

Natasha tried to blend into the crowd of thousands surrounding her. Her black suit and brown leather jacket did very little to help conceal her, however. It made her wonder if she should have worn something more colorful to at least _attempt _to blend in. Her only hope was that there were so many people and so much to look at that she might simply be an afterthought.

And the Ceremony _was _colorful. Elaborately costumed civilians on stilts walked through the city square, pulling streamers behind them as children tried to catch the fluttering ends. Dragon costumes in a myriad of colors passed by, their movements accented by the steady beating of drums from musicians. Dancers in traditional Bhutanese garb filled the spaces in between, while many more plainly dressed guests (if you could call them "plain") visited food booths and trinket kiosks set up around the square. Hardly an inch of space wasn't filled or being used for ceremony purposes, and it was never more evident to Tony as he tried to push through the sheer volume of people.

"Not sure how we're going see anything in here" he radioed to the others in his group. "I can hardly hear my own thoughts in this crowd."

Across the square, Natasha smirked to herself. "Well _that's _a first." She kept her eyes peeled for anything that looked suspicious as she kept to the perimeter. "Maximoff, you copy? How's it looking on your end?"

Wanda was closer to the center of the ceremony's commotion. She pressed a finger to her ear as she sidestepped a crowd performer. "All's calm so far. Nothing suspect."

"Barton?"

"Same here" he radioed. His position next to the massive golden statue of the Buddha showed nothing out of the ordinary. Just guests enjoying their night at the ceremony.

Tony was trying to move closer to the food stands when three children nearly ran into his legs. "Just let me know if anyone wants to trade spots for a while" he radioed. "I think that was the fifth time I've almost been trampled to death since being out here."

"Oh come on, Stark" Natasha teased. "Try and enjoy yourself while we wait, wouldya?"

"Yeah, Stark - try and pretend there isn't a deadly bio-weapon that might be unleashed out here, wouldya?" Clint mocked. He tried to hide his laugh, knowing damn well that Nat was frowning somewhere across the crowd between them.

"I'd suggest keeping the snark to a minimum, Barton" radioed Nat.

He nodded to no one, smirking as his eyes roamed over the crowd. _So far, so good_, he thought. It made him wonder how the others were fairing.

* * *

Several guards waiting at the entrance of the facility were quickly taken out by Steve and his shield. Bucky shot out the security cameras one by one with an electro-neutralizer, which effectively shorted out the entire facility's security camera system. With Steve in the lead, they moved inside the grand foyer. Here he silently indicated they should begin splitting up.

As Steve headed up the stairwell to the topmost floors, Bucky raised his automatic rifle and followed. He took one final look over his shoulder as Alex and Sam disappeared down the stairs. He felt fear rise into his throat when he lost sight of Alex, but had to trust her skills and her power to keep her safe while he couldn't.

As Sam and Alex descended, she could already feel the cold ambient air of the lower levels filling the stone stairway. The further they went, the colder it got. When they came to the next floor, Alex pulled a pistol from her hip holster and with a nod, indicated to Sam she would take the basement. Sam acknowledged her with a thumbs up, then headed through the doors of his assigned floor while Alex descended one more flight of stairs.

In her left hand, Alex summoned Wanda's powers, while her right hand held the pistol out. With two methods of defense at her disposal, she was ready if someone jumped out and attempted to ambush her. She followed the stairs downward until she came to a singular set of doors at the end. Giant yellow and red _Warning _signs were posted, but she couldn't read the language to know what they were warning her against. All things considered, the barred windows on the door didn't bold well.

A panel with a red lever was suspended to the right of the door with no other markings around it, so Alex pulled down on it. She stepped back, watching as some sort of automatic latching system within the doors were activated and released. With a groan, the doors swung inward and opened up to the room beyond.

With her senses on high alert, Alex entered the basement room. She kept her gun raised and her powers ready. As she stepped through the doors, the sound of her boots on the concrete floor produced a slight echo, giving the room an emptiness she could feel without even seeing. With concrete walls and an open emptiness to the floor plan, it was painfully colder in here than any other part of the facility thus far.

She flipped a light switch on the wall and watched each of the rows of halogen lights flick on in succession. It became evident that the room was some sort of laboratory. The outer walls were covered with computer screens of various sizes, none of which appeared to be turned on. Desks with various control panels sat below these, along with office chairs and shelves full of unmarked binders. Luckily, the room itself showed no one present, but Alex could tell by the positions of the chairs that whoever had been down here before had left in a hurry. The chairs themselves were somewhat askew, drawing her attention around the room. Still, she heard nothing or sensed any presence there besides her own.

There was a barred wall in the middle of the room that blocked Alex's view beyond. Similarly to the entrance, another red lever was attached to the frame of the wall. With her gun poised in front of her, Alex flipped the lever. As the walls lowered into the floor and disappeared, what she encountered then was far worse than the enemy she expected to find there. So much so, she lowered her gun out of pure awe.

In the middle of the room was a chair surrounded by computerized, articulating metal arms. At the end of these arms were panels covered in glowing blue sensors. They were curved; clearly meant to attach to someone's skull. The arms of the chair also had similar panels with glowing sensors, curved to conform to someone's limbs and torso. A pair of shackles sat open and ready near the bottom to secure a person's ankles.

_It's the chair_ , Alex thought in horror. She took a step forward, her breath suspended in her chest. _It's the chair from Bucky's memories. _

The design itself was meant for torture, she could see that much, but she could only guess what those ominous sensors did to whoever sat there. She took another step forward, her eyes staring at the topmost panels of the mechanism. She reached out with her left hand, barely letting her gloved fingers touch the metal. Even so, she could feel power emitting from the sensors. A cold dread slowed her blood, unable to fathom how anyone could use such a thing on another human being.

_Is this what they used on him? Is this how they controlled him?_

Out of the corner of her eye, Alex caught the smallest movement near the doorway. She spun and aimed her gun at the entrance, her expression fierce and focused as one of Hydra's agents emerged with his own gun raised.

"Put your weapon down" the man instructed. His voice was as cold and soulless as the room.

"You first" Alex growled. She quietly summoned Wanda's powers in her left hand, feeling the energy balling inside her palm.

The man snickered. "You can't win here. There's no way you can."

He dared to take another step forward, so Alex took one of her own. "What is this chair used for?!" she demanded. When the man didn't answer, she took yet another step towards him. "_Tell me!"_

The roughness of her demand caused the agent to pause, if only out of surprise at her boldness. "You _know _what it does. You wouldn't be here if you didn't already know what we do."

Alex could feel her powers thrumming in her ears as she dug deeper into her inner well where her energies lived. She pulled little by little up and out of her, feeling it pool in her left hand.

"In fact," the man continued, a greasy smile appearing on his face, "I'd stand to wager you already know _who _that chair has been used on."

Alex's stomach tightened. She steadied her arm and kept the gun pointed at his face.

"That's right. Our prototype. He's upstairs, isn't he?" The man's smile grew larger. "There can be no mistake. His arm gives him away every time."

Anger rose hot and fast inside Alex. "And lookwhose side he's fighting for now." Her smirk was as cocky as her tone. "For all the bragging you're doing, it sure looks to me like your sick little experiments didn't have much of a shelf life, did they?"

Her comment got the reaction she hoped for. The man moved to fire his gun at the same moment Alex threw the first ball of energy. Using Wanda's powers, she ripped the gun from his hand and halted him from running in one go. Placing her own gun back in its holster, she freed both her hands to manipulate her energy further, securing the man by the neck and suspending him above the floor.

"What was that part about me not being able to win?" She walked casually forward, still holding him in the air with her power.

Fear appeared in the whites of the man's eyes as he stared down at her. "You're...you're one of those freaks..." he stammered, finding it hard to breathe as long as Alex continued to hold him.

"I've heard it all and none of it phases me anymore" she said with a roll of her eyes. "Now tell me something useful: _where's the bio-weapon?" _

_"It's not..." _

Alex tightened the hold she had on him, causing him to squirm in mid-air. "I'll say it again: _where is the bio-weapon_?"

Arteries in the agent's temples bulged as he choked._"It's...it's not..."_He gasped for air, so Alex eased up. " _It's nothere."_

_"_ You actually expect me to believe that?!"

"_They are all...in...the city..."_

This caused Alex to pause. "They?!" Her heart hammered in her chest. "What do you mean _they?!"_

She lowered him to the ground, keeping Wanda's powers wrapped tightly around him to prevent him from moving. She crouched near his head, released the gloved part of her suit, and placed her open palm on his face

_ Mathematical equations._   
_Passwords._   
_Breakfast._   
_ Chemical compositions  
Restless sleep._

She sifted through the man's most recent thoughts and memories until she found what she wanted:

_ Animals. Several of them._   
_An explosion._   
_Rashes burning into flesh._   
_ The stench of death.  
Raw fear._

She withdrew her hand as if she'd been burnt. "What are those animals I saw in your mind?"

The man stared at her, shaking his head as if the mentioning of it frightened him. Alex hesitated, replaying the images from the memories over in her mind in an attempt to make sense of what she saw.

That split second of hesitation cost her.

Two more Hydra agents emerged from behind. By the time Alex swung around to hurtle her powers at them, one had fired their weapon at her. A large disc-shaped item shot from the gun and locked around Alex's neck as she fell to the ground.

"That'll be enough out of you" said one of the men as he walked forward.

Alex reached up, grasping at the metal collar bound to her neck. A ring of heat encircled her skin, spreading from her neck outward through the rest of her body. Inside her, she could feel the constant flickering flame that was her powers slowly snuff out. She flexed her hands, desperately trying to summon her powers but nothing happened. She tried again, but she could feel something was missing inside her. The place where her powers lived was now hollow.

"Hope you like your new suppression collar." He grabbed Alex by the back of her hair, lifting her to her feet. "You two: cuff her."

When Alex heard what was around her neck, fear settled into her bones. She'd never lived a moment of her life without her powers and now they were stripped from her. Her brain scrambled to come up with a backup plan, but the men were already forcing her hands behind her back. They weren't gentle, either; their hands contorted her joints as they wrenched her wrists into yet another metal device. They hauled her roughly to the opposite side of the room where they placed her in a holding chair, locking another set of cuffs to her ankles.

The only acknowledgement Alex gave them was a cold stare, even as one of the agents knelt in front of her.

"Now that you're in a more agreeable position, it's time to deal with your friends upstairs. They've done a bit of damage already, but I think they'll be more inclined to work with us now that we have you to bargain with."

Fear must have flashed in Alex's eyes, because the man began to laugh.

"Uh oh...What's that I see? Something _scares _you?"

Alex refused to answer him. She looked away, trying to identify some kind of weakness in the room she could use to her advantage, but his clammy hand grabbed at her face and forced her eyes back on him.

"You're a pretty little thing, aren't you, Freak?" His fingers went to the collar on her neck, his eyes roaming her body. "Hmmm. My guess is: you care for someone upstairs, and _that's_what you're afraid of. Tell me, Freak: who's upstairs that would be willing to make a sacrifice to get you back?"

Fear thickened Alex's blood. The two other agents closed in, their rifles pointed at her. The man kneeling in front of her removed his hand from her collar and reached into one of his vest pockets. He lifted out a small device and held it up to her.

"Know what this is?"

Once again, Alex refused to answer.

"It controls the collar currently locked on to your neck." He cocked his head, his smile turning barbaric. "Want to see what else it does? Besides ridding you of your precious little mutant powers?"

Alex could feel the initial bite of dread latching on to her insides, but she absolutely would not let it show. They may have stripped her of her powers, but they could never take her strength of will.

The man shook his head. "You're being a real pain in the fucking ass right now, Freak." He stood, then took a few steps back. "I guess if you won't talk, then I'll have to make you."

He clicked a button on the device, and searing hot pain unlike any Alex had ever felt before rattled through her, originating from her neck. She felt her muscles go slack from the agony. The man clicked the button again, and Alex felt pain erupt through her neck into her skull, radiating outward like fingers of lightning. Her body convulsed in the restraints of the chair, but she swallowed yet another scream between clenched teeth. Her face grew red under the pressure as she stared at the agent with vitriol in her dark eyes. When he clicked the button one more time, Alex broke.

Four stories above, Bucky heard Alex's scream and his world came to a standstill.

* * *

The first inkling Tony had that something was wrong was the path that had cleared between the people near the food booths. He'd been standing there for almost an hour, watching the hoards of people making their rounds from the food to the trinkets then back to the food. For that entire hour, the crowd appeared as an amoeba. No real edge, no real center, always moving, always shifting. Never was there a distinct clearing anywhere in the throng of people.

From his position near the line of booths, Tony saw people moving out of the way to allow for a large delivery truck to pass. Until now, there'd been no vehicles on the streets. He glanced at his watch to see it was nearing the 10 pm hour.

"Hey, guys? Heads-up" Tony radioed. He sped up his walking pace. "Strange timing for a delivery truck, wouldn't you say? Heading down by the food booths. Northwest sector."

Natasha peered up over the crowd, trying to get eyes on the vehicle. "Can't see it from my vantage point."

"I see it" said Wanda. "Tony, you're still the closest. Keep an eye on it until I get over there."

He was already on it. Pushing through the crowd as gently and unsuspecting as he could, he rounded a corner and came up behind the delivery truck. Upon getting a closer look, he noticed the back doors had hexagonal barred windows, which eerily resembled that of an animal control truck. "Where ya at Maximoff?"

"Almost there!" She weaved through the brightly colored costumes and billowing streamers. "I see it! It's coming my way."

By now, Barton had climbed up a wall near the Buddha statue, crouching as he wound around the ledge to get a better look. "I have eyes on it. Southwest sector." He saw the design and frowned. "What the hell is it? It looks like kind of animal transport?"

Natasha swore under her breath. She still couldn't see the damn truck and she needed to. Something inside her gut was firing off warning pangs, increasing her sense of panic. "Where's it heading? I can try and cut it off." She spun on her heels, trying to get a view of where it was coming from.

Tony double tapped the side of his black-rimmed glasses, activating the sensors he'd built into them. He locked on to the delivery truck and got a heat signature. "Six bodies inside." He walked quickly, trying to keep the truck in his sights. As he zoomed in on the bodies inside and got an outline, he stopped dead in his tracks. "They aren't human."

Nat screwed her face up in disbelief. "What do you mean they aren't human?!"

"Their heat signatures show four legs and they're fucking huge" Tony radioed back. "Maximoff?!"

"Getting in front of it now!"

Tony's heart rate finally hit that familiar level it always did right before shit hit the fan. He watched the delivery truck make a slight turn, its nose pointed right for the town square. "I'd say they're aiming for a dead center hit" he radioed. "Everybody move in. _Now_."

His fingers flew as he activated a panel that emerged from his watch. He sent a quick message to their backup, and then initiated his Iron Man suit.

* * *

Alex sat panting, her face angled down at the floor where she watched a small puddle of blood begin to form. Her nose was bleeding. She could taste copper in the back of her throat. Clots of blood caused her to choke, spitting a mix of saliva and blood onto the floor. Whatever the collar was, or whatever it was meant to do, it worked. Ever since the apparatus attached itself to her, she not only lost her powers but felt her energy steadily draining. Thoughts became hazy and her focus wavered. She was utterly powerless, and all she could do was sit and wait with her captors.

When Alex heard Bucky arrive, she lifted her head shakily and felt hope return to her body. Her eyes locked onto his, their beautiful blue-gray color now wild with anger. "_James_..."

"I'm here, Alexis." He kept his rifle pointed at the man who held the remote to her collar, but his eyes stayed on her. "Just hang on. Everything's gonna be okay."

Coming up behind him was Steve. He took a quick assessment of the situation, but when his eyes landed on Alex, a muscle in his jaw visibly tensed. _"_Let her go" he demanded. "We don't want any more trouble. Just let her go and we'll retreat."

"You killed _half my men_. What exactly were you hoping to do here?" The agent's eyes turned to Bucky. "And _you! _We've heard stories about you. _Our prototype_. We all wondered when you'd come back." He smiled evilly. "Remember your old friend over there?" He nodded towards the chair, his crazed laugh ripping through the silence.

Bucky would kill them all. Every single one of them. Rage made every muscle in his body ready to kill with a desire to see them writhe in pain, and he'd do it without fear of consequence if they hurt Alex any further. It was already too much to see her like this, with blood running down the front of her face and a collar around her neck like a broken animal. The sight of it unleashed a deepseated fury he didn't realize he still had in him.

"What do you want in exchange for her?" Bucky asked, his voice like gravel.

"Hmmm...good question." The man began to slowly pace in front of Alexis, tapping his chin with the remote. "It'd be nice to know why you're here. But I suppose we already gathered that." He feigned surprised, his expression turning to that of someone who just thought of something. "Oh, that reminds me: the weapon you're looking for isn't here."

"_Where is it?_" Steve demanded callously.

"Currently raining hell on the festival in town. In fact, all six of them are."

"_Six _of them?" Steve's entire demeanor changed as realization settled in. "What?"

From the chair, Alex coughed and blood fell from her mouth. Bucky felt his insides twist with fury. He was tired of talking. He was tired of wasting time. Alexis needed him, and standing there arguing over where the threat was seemed futile to him.

So he threw his rifle down.

The sound of metal on cold concrete drew Alex's eyes up from the floor.

"Back to my original question" Bucky said as he kicked his gun away. "What do you want in exchange_for her?_"

The man smiled. "Well that's simple. We want you."

"Done."

Alex couldn't believe what she heard. Bucky hadn't even hesitated. She looked between him and Steve, begging with her eyes for him to do something. Steve kept his gaze locked on the agents who still had their guns pointed at them.

For a brief moment, Bucky looked back at his friend before turning and offering himself to the agents. His expression was void of any emotion, his eyes cold as he walked forward. "Release her."

The agent with the remote shifted a glance at the other two with the rifles. "Not until you're in cuffs."

"The only pair of cuffs you have are on her. So unless you plan on making another pair, I suggest you take hers off."

Once more, the agent hesitated. Seconds passed in silence before he gave a signal to the two others. "Put him in the chair."

Alex's eyes widened. "_NO! DON'T!" _She tried to free herself, struggling against her restraints to no avail as they took Bucky towards the chair. "DON'T DO THIS!" she cried. _"I'm not worth it!"_

A wry smile tugged at Bucky's mouth as they shoved him into the chair. If only she knew how worth it she was.

Across the floor, Steve was also shouting, confronting the two men with rifles as they approached him. In those last few moments, Alex didn't hear anything other than her crying. They shoved Bucky into the chair, readying the computer system that would keep him locked there. His eyes never left Alex's.

In the chaos of the moment, none of the agents saw Sam's tiny drone fly in through the entrance. Even Alex didn't see it until it dropped a smoke bomb in the center of the room. A yellow cloud exploded, distorting everything in a pale yellow haze.

And then Bucky unleashed his rage.

Shooting out of the chair, he palmed one of the agent's skulls with his metal hand, slamming it against the metal arms of the chair to a gruesome spray of blood. He didn't stop until he felt the bones of the man's face crack, then tossed his lifeless body to the side. Next, he turned to the man with control of Alex's collar. He had emerged through the smoke wielding a cocked rifle, but he never got the chance to fire it. Bucky ripped the weapon from the agent's grasp and slammed the butt of it against the his forehead. As he stumbled backward, Bucky grabbed him by the jaw, the metal plates of his arm locking into place. He squeezed until the jaw unhinged from the rest of his skull, and then threw him the length of the room. He'd thrown him so hard that the body left an imprint in the concrete wall before slumping brokenly to the floor.

Alex watched the whole thing with wide eyes. She'd never seen such wrath come to life, but just as quickly as it erupted, it was over. Bucky was now kneeling at her feet, his hands detaching the collar around her throat with utmost care.

"_James, _thank God-_"_

"-it's okay now. I'm here." His hands cradled Alex's face as he looked her in the eyes. Gone was the strength with which he killed those men, replaced by the gentleness Alex had come to love. "_I'm here_" he breathed. "I'm not going anywhere."

He moved behind her and disengaged the restraints around her wrists, then unlocked the ones around her ankles. Alex felt instant relief around her joints, but even more so she felt the freedom from the control of her collar. Now that she was free, Alex threw her arms around him. " _Thank you_." She clutched at his shoulders with closed eyes, his sturdy body a reassuring safe haven.

Bucky stroked her face tenderly, anguish in his eyes. With care, he wiped the blood from beneath her nose with his thumb. "I'm so sorry." He smoothed the hair back from her face, apology in his eyes. "I'm so sorry I wasn't here sooner."

"You're here now." She placed her hands on his, tears staining her face. "I was...I was scared they were going to use that chair-"

"-I wasn't going to let them" he told her, resolve heavy in his voice. "They would have never gotten that far."

The _zing _of Steve's shield rang across the walls, the cloud of yellow smoke billowing in its wake. Their attentions followed the shield towards the entrance where Sam now appeared. Neither Bucky nor Alex even saw him enter the room until now. His wings sliced through the metal doors, wind billowing the smoke in swirls of yellow. It was enough to bring their attention back to the present moment, which very much needed them. Bucky helped Alex stand, his hand supporting her low back as they moved towards the doorway.

When Steve emerged through the smoke to find both Bucky and Alex walking, his shoulders dropped in relief. "Thank God. Are you okay, Markos?"

"I think so." She flexed her hand a few times, showing them that Wanda's powers were flickering back to life. "It may take a few more minutes 'til these come back, but I'm fine."

"It was a suppression collar" Bucky told Steve. The words came out cold and bitter.

Steve understood now, and his heart went out to the both of them. He could see the anger in Bucky's eyes even at the mentioning of such a device. "Hopefully it won't take long until you're 100 percent" he told Alex. "Stark radioed me in the middle of all this. The agents were right: whatever they're making here is currently in the city. And whatever it is, it isn't the bio-weapon we thought."

Sam appeared through the smoke now, his finger to his ear. "We gotta go. Stark's in trouble." His dark eyes passed over each of them before landing on Steve. "He says there's six."

Bucky frowned. "Six what, though?"

"He called them _creatures_." Sam exhaled. "Six _fucking ugly creatures _to be exact."

Steve placed his shield on his back. "There's a helicopter out back. Buck - can you fly?"

Bucky gave him a solid nod.

With gentleness Alex didn't expect, Steve placed his hand on her shoulder. "You sure you're good to go?"

"Yes." She gave him a reassuring smile. "Our team needs us."

It was all the signal Steve needed. As a unit, they headed out to the helicopter with their sights now set on helping the others. Only Alex knew how shaken she truly was. Even as they loaded into the helicopter, she could still feel the clamp of the collar around her neck. She kept this to herself, but the shadow of pain the collar left would haunt her for days.


	11. Chapter 11

By the time Alex and the others arrived at Thimphu's city square, her powers were completely restored. The empty space that developed inside her while the collar was on was now brimming with sensations; all familiar, all welcomed. As she sat inside the helicopter, she focused her mind on drawing forth more energy into her palms. If they were about to encounter something that none of them had planned on encountering, she might need all the energy she could produce. 

Bucky piloted the helicopter towards the city, flying them toward the square. He slowed to a hover over the chaos, giving them all an initial look at what they were up against. Alex had to lean over Steve's shoulder to see out the window, and what she saw resembled a mad scattering of ants. The only two Avengers she could see from that high was Tony, now in full Iron Man mode hovering above the square with his jets powered on. She also saw Wanda's red swirls of energy on the opposite side of the square, indicating she was down there somewhere in the hoards of frightened ceremony-goers. 

"What's causing it? Can anyone see?" Steve kept his eyes peeled on the ground below. 

Bucky brought the helicopter lower, trying to locate a landing spot near the square. The lower they got, the more they could see, but they still couldn't locate what these creatures were that Tony was referring to. That was, until, Wanda's powers lifted one into the air. 

"Holy shit" Alex uttered in shock. 

Sam's mouth hung open as he stared down. "What in the hell IS that?" 

The creature they saw was massive. Its shape was neither human nor animal, it's head broad with a widely gaping mouth. Surrounding its head were layers and layers of wrinkled folds of leathery skin which lay hanging off its neck. It appeared to walk on four legs, but the one Wanda had suspended had been caught rising up onto disfigured legs. Its razor sharp teeth were exposed as it howled against Wanda's efforts, waving its clawed hands in vain. 

Steve saw the creature and immediately leaned towards Bucky. "We need to get down there!" he yelled over the noiseof the helicopter. "Can you land us near the center? By that statue?" 

"Already on it!" Bucky swung the copter around, and though he didn't have much room, he thought he could wedge the copter down onto one of the wider streets near the statue Steve indicated. 

"Get ready to go the second we're on the ground" Steve told them. 

When the helicopter touched down, the Avengers bolted out into a cloud of street dust surging around them, ducking to avoid the spinning blades. Bucky wasted no time unstrapping himself; he jumped out the pilot's door and ran close behind Alex as they sprinted into the action. They were quickly engulfed by the crowd, but did their best to stay together. 

"Well, well. Look who's late to the party!" Tony radioed. Even through their earpieces, his sarcasm was plainly evident. 

Steve pushed through a throng of people, trying to identify where the creatures were. "Where do you need us, Stark?" 

"Romanoff and Barton are working on one to the southwest. Maximoff's got one of them. I got the other. Isolate as many as you can." 

Alex looked up just as Tony soared past. It was the first time she saw Iron Man in action, and she took exactly one second to appreciate the amazing sight she was witnessing. If she wasn't bloodied, bruised, and about to attack an unknown threat, she would have marked it as one of the coolest things she'd ever seen. 

As Tony flew by, he used his repulsers to burn a line into the stone street, effectively making a deep trench around the square. "Stay behind the lines and keep the citizens away from the inner circle, got it?" 

Alex barely had time to register this before she got her first taste of what the hell they were dealing with. Her and Bucky came to a stop when one of the creatures nearly plowed both of them over as it ran by. The first thing they noticed was the stench. When it blew past at a lumbering gallop, the smell it left in its wake almost made Alex vomit. It smelled rotten and sickly, and looked similarly as well. Its body was a mix of marbled red and white coloring, if you could call it that. Its body was a twisted mess of exposed musculature and leather hide. And the _head_... 

"James..." Alex reached for him, her eyes pinned to the creature. "What _is _that?" 

Bucky had seen a lot of things in his 100 plus years, and none of them looked like the monster they were staring at. He lifted his rifle and aimed it at the creature. "I don't have a damn clue, but it's about to die." 

Alex stared at the thing as Bucky fired a succession of shots; all of them aimed right between its hideous eyes. To their horror, the bullets made absolutely zero damage. The leathery outside acted as a repulsion of some kind, the bullets rapidly scattering once they hit its skin. 

Bucky lowered his weapon in shock. "What the-" 

"Watch out!" 

Angered by the bullets and distracted from chasing its human victim, the monster turned and began to charge. Alex wielded the energy from her hands towards the monster, halting it from approaching any further. It remained suspended, ripping angrily at the air with its claws. 

Bucky whipped out his largest knife. "Expose its neck!" 

Alex had to grit her teeth to do it, but she manipulated the energy to bend the creature's elongated head backwards. Bucky ran towards it and with all the force he could put behind it, slashed the knife across its neck. The monster screamed and bared its teeth as dark black blood spurted from the folds around its neck, but the cut barely made a dent in its massive body. Bucky took one more chance and aimed for its gaping mouth. With the strength of his metal arm, he hurtled the knife into its mouth and lodged it deep in the back of its throat. 

Its deformed body went slack in Alex's energy field, making no more movement. She released her hold and let it fall lifelessly to the ground. 

Cautiously, Bucky walked over and crouched next to its head. He reached in and grabbed his knife, then wiped the blood off on the leg of his pants. He met the questioning gaze of Alex as she approached. "What do you make of it?" 

She shook her head. The thing was not of this world. Up close, it looked more like a slug with legs and the skin of a dinosaur. "None of this makes any sense." 

Bucky sheathed his knife. "So bullets don't work..." 

"And knives barely do" Alex added, still shocked by everything. It was hard to process it all. "How the hell do we kill these things?" 

The corner of Bucky's mouth quirked. "How many knives do you have?" 

They looked at one another and shared a smile, but their moment was interrupted. A strange rumbling began to echo from the ground beneath them. Above them, a light began to appear in the night sky. Clouds formed out of nowhere, swirling together as fingers of lightning began to streak across the sky. 

When he figured out what was happening, Bucky grabbed Alex by the arm. "We gotta move." Hand in hand, he pulled her with him as they ran away from an area of swirling dust that had begun to form in the center of the square. 

Over the sound of thunder that had begun, Tony's voice could be heard in their ears. "_Incoming!_" 

It was the first time Alex witnessed the appearance of Thor, and it left her speechless. He dropped out of the swirling clouds in a tornado of electricity and light, and then he was standing before him. Just _standing _there, with his fluttering cape and his hammer, looking as calm as if he just stepped off a train. Alex's jaw hung open. 

Thor turned and stared at Bucky and Alex. His broad smile appeared suddenly. "Winter Solider! Greetings! Where is the foe that Stark warned me of?" 

Alex was still floored by what she was seeing. She knew Thor was real. She read his file and knew he was part of the Avengers and all, but _damn_. She watched Bucky walk up to the god and shake his hand, which was almost as surprising to her as Thor's elaborate entrance. The men spoke for only a moment, nothing that Alex could hear over the dissipating cloud storm above them, and then Thor was off and running. 

When Bucky returned, he couldn't help but smile at the expression Alex was wearing. "You get used to it after awhile." 

Alex's eyebrows rose. "Do you, though!?" This garnered a chuckled from him, but she was dead serious. 

It was at this point that Steve radioed, letting everyone know Thor had already killed one of the creatures. He also made mention that his shield worked in bringing the monsters down, but Tony had to blast it in the throat with his repulsers to actually kill it. 

"How many are left?" Natasha radioed through labored breaths. She was busy helping some of the frantic citizens into safety. 

Tony spun in the air, the sensors of his suit searching through the panicked crowd. "Two left - both in close proximity." He burned another trench into the ground to isolate one of the two that were left, then got to work on the second. 

Bucky and Alex watched from their vantage point near the center of the square as Thor swung his hammer, aimed it at the creatures one by one, and took them both out with ease. 

"So apparently _that's _how you kill them" Alex uttered softly. Next to her, Bucky smiled. 

When it was all said and done and Tony's suit could locate no further monster signatures in the square, the Avengers met in the center of the square. Their facial expressions said it all. Some were out of breath; others were dirty and worn from the chase and attempting to kill the creatures. But they all looked at one another with question in their eyes. 

Tony cut the jets in his suit and lowered to the ground in the middle of the group. His red and gold helmet peeled back to reveal the troubled look on his face. "Okay, what the fuck was that?" 

"Clearly not a bio-weapon like we thought" Steve said with dismay. He locked his shield onto his back and shook his head. "It's not every day something can resist vibranium." 

"How many casualties?" Alex asked. She was afraid to hear the answer, whatever it was. 

Tony's dark eyes met hers. "Seven." 

The Avengers hung their heads. It could have been worse. _Way _ worse. But the number unsettled them nonetheless. 

Thor approached, his large frame and distinctive walk drawing the group's attention. His expression appeared troubled. "Were those species of this planet? I've not seen the likes of them before." 

Removing a piece of his armor on his forearm, Tony lifted out a piece of dark material and held it before the others. "I took a sample from one of the dead ones. Ran a quick scan." 

"And?" Barton asked. 

"Nothing anthropomorphic identified." Tony placed it back in his suit. "I'll need to send the rest of it to Bruce." 

"I looked into the mind of one of the agents back at the facility" Alex said. The attention of the group turned her way and she wondered if any of them were questioning the blood on her face. "I saw a few things that could help explain this, but it wasn't much." 

Tony gave her a nod. "Let's save it all for the safe house." 

"Did you radio in clean-up?" asked Steve. 

"They'll be here soon." 

The group looked at one another. Steve was the first to move, indicating to the helicopter that sat not far from where they stood. "Nearest safe house is in Kathmandu. Let's reconvene there and discuss everything we've learned." 

Thor walked to the edge of the group and turned to face them. "I'll meet you all there." In a flash of light and a swirl of clouds, he was gone. 

* * *

When the crew arrived at the S.H.I.E.L.D. safe house, they filed into the small apartment soundlessly. They were all visibly exhausted, and their minds were too busy to really say much of anything to one another. Nat went immediately to the washroom, Wanda prepared some hot water for tea, and both Tony and Steve watched the recorded video and audio from Tony's suit. Everyone else went straight to the common area and rested in whatever seating was available. 

Each one of them had the same look on their face: _ what the hell just happened, and what the hell are we going to do about it? _

Alex had those very same questions in mind, but she tried not to think about them. She was weary from everything that had happened and she wanted a break from it. For starters, she needed to relieve some of the weight she was carrying. One by one, she laid her guns on the apartment's kitchen table, feeling a little less burdened. She rolled her neck and shoulders to try and alleviate the tightness in her muscles. In doing so, she thought she could still feel a ring of tightness where the suppression collar had been. The thought caused her to feel nauseous, so she pushed it away and focused on the interior of the apartment. 

While she had never been to a defensive safe house before, what Alex found on the inside didn't surprise her much. It was a windowless apartment on the top floor of a nondescript building. They were now somewhere on the outskirts of Kathmandu, Nepal, under orders from S.H.I.E.L.D. There were no decorations, only the most basic of furniture, but it was outfitted with the highest-grade security that was offered. 

If it had a shower and a bed, then that's all that mattered to Alex. 

Nat emerged from the hallway, wiping her hands on her pants. "Sooo...are we gonna discuss what just happened?" 

The line of Steve's mouth tightened. "I think we should, yes." 

"Let's begin with the basics" Tony said, shoving his hands in his pockets. "How did we go from expecting a biohazard weapon to getting a truck full of saggy-necked monsters?" 

Alex leaned against the wall, listening as the group began to discuss the sequence of events that lead to the discovery of the monsters. She watched each one of them closely and how they handled the discussion, including Bucky. He spoke very little, but she could tell by the way he was sitting and the way his hand flexed periodically that he was frustrated by what he heard. 

"So we're thinking they make these monsters in the facility you raided?" Tony asked Steve. 

He nodded. "According to what Alex reported." 

All eyes turned her direction. 

"All I can tell you is that the laboratory had the means to make such a thing." She swallowed, feeling the ghost of the collar still around her neck. "The equipment. The tools. All of it. It was partially confirmed when I scanned the memories of one of the workers there. Based on that, it has to be where they made them." 

"What did you see?" Steve's question was posed gently, but everyone looked at her with expectation. Only Bucky looked at her with compassion. 

"I only had a few seconds, but I saw a chemical explosion" Alex told them. "It took place in that lab, and it killed a lot of people. I saw the same rashes that were reported in the news, but they were burned into the animals - or whatever they are." 

"So the chemicals poisoning the fish and causing the rashes were accidents..." Natasha mulled this over as she began to pace. "What if they were breeding these things and trying different chemicals to make them more resistant?" 

"Resistant to _us_" Steve added. He looked at Tony. "That lines up." 

"Our biohazard weapon wasn't the weapon at all. It was used to make the real weapon better at resisting death." Tony looked at each one of the Avengers there. "This is way worse than we thought." 

And it was. Alex knew that much right then and there, and she was exhausted just thinking about it. If there were more of these things being bred by Hydra, and if iteration after iteration got more and more resistant to their efforts? 

She placed a hand to her face and wiped it tiredly. In doing so, she realized she still had dried blood crusted to her face and her nose from hours ago. So as the others continued their discussion, Alex quietly excused herself. She hoped no one would care if she left the discussion, but a part of her didn't care. She was spent, emotionally and physically. Being in the middle of the action had a way of keeping the adrenaline pumping, but the minute it was over, Alex felt like her legs would give out from the weariness. 

She found the washroom down the hall and went to the sink, taking a look at herself for the first time since they left New York. She looked far better than she felt, which was a relief. She had quite a bit of darkened blood around her nose and mouth, and some by her ear, but overall it wasn't too bad. 

She located the towels and moistened a face cloth with warm water. She leaned over the sink and splashed herself with cool water, feeling the grime of the night wash down the drain. When she lifted her head and looked in the mirror again, Bucky was standing behind her. He'd taken off the leather and Kevlar top of his uniform, wearing only a black compression top. There was compassion in his eyes when he looked at her, as well as the tiny smile he wore. 

"Hey, darling." 

Alex felt her last shred of resolve crumble when she saw him. Overwhelmed by everything including her own emotions, she turned and threw her arms around his neck. She felt fresh tears come to her eyes as she gave in to her tiredness. 

Bucky wrapped his arms around her, listening with an aching heart as Alex began to cry. They stood there for a few minutes in silence. Bucky stroked the back of Alex's head, letting her have as much time as she needed. 

"I'm sorry" she said, wiping her nose as she pulled away. "I'm just so tired..." 

"Hey, it's alright. I get it." Bucky took the warm cloth from her and gently wiped away her tears. He tried to smile for her. "You're allowed to be. It doesn't always have to be 100% all the time. At least, not with me." 

His kindness almost made Alex start crying again. "I know, I just..." She looked away before meeting the tenderness in his gaze. "...that_collar_, James." Her bottom lip trembled. "It was awful. _Awful_." 

Bucky felt guilt weigh heavy in his bones. "I know." 

"I never want to feel that thing on me ever again." 

"You won't. Not as long as I can prevent it." 

Bucky drew Alex back into his arms, nuzzling his face in her neck. Alex sunk into the warmth and protection of his body. The stress and pain, at least for the moment, disappeared in his soothing embrace. His touch had a way of melting the world away until it was just them. 

When Bucky pulled away, he took Alex's hand in his. "Come on. Let's lie down." 

Alex didn't argue. She let Bucky lead her into one of the apartment's side bedrooms and closed the door behind them. It wasn't much of a room: a thin mattress covered in plain sheets, no windows, and a small dresser. But the peace it offered was truly all it needed. 

Doing her best to get a little more comfortable, Alex unzipped the top part of her one-piece suit and tied the sleeves around her hips. Now in just the black tank top she had on beneath, she felt a lot less restricted. She joined Bucky on the bed, stretching out next to him and finding a spot in the crook of his arm. Her eyelids already felt heavy, but she didn't want to fall asleep just yet. She wanted to savor the moment and the safety of being next to him. 

"Thank you, James." 

"For what?" His voice was quiet; unsure. 

"For everything. For saving me. For being you. For _this_." 

Bucky's mouth twitched, just the tiniest of humble smiles. "I should have gotten to you sooner. I should have been the one to go with you instead of Sam. Even so, I hope you know I'll always protect you." 

The fact that he felt the need to give voice to that tore at Alex's heart. She shifted her gaze upward. "Of _course _I know. You prove it to me in so many ways. Even something as simple as being here with me now. You give me somewhere safe to be, if only from my own thoughts." 

When Bucky heard this, it meant more to him than Alex knew. For decades, people only knew him as a weapon. No one was safe near him as long as he remained Hydra's tool. He had struggled with the guilt of this fact daily, both during and after his recovery. Now, not only did he have a woman he would move worlds for, but she lay in his arms confessing that she found protection in him. That she felt _safe _with him. It was something he never thought would be possible again. 

He pressed a kiss to her forehead, relishing the moment. "Rest, darling." He hugged her closer, feeling her body soften against his. In time, Alex's breathing slowed, and he knew she'd finally fallen asleep. 

Only after did Bucky allow himself to sleep. He lay his cheek against the top of Alex's head, giving her one more soft kiss before he let slumber take him. 

* * *

Out in the common area, the discussion raged on. When enough of them were satisfied with the theories they produced, it reached a temporary conclusion. More so, they reached a point where those in the discussion were either exhausted, hungry, or thirsty enough to end for those reasons. In an effort to provide some comfort, Wanda made tea for those who wanted some, and several gladly took her up on the offer. 

Knowing that both Bucky and Alex had disappeared during the conversation, Steve purposely hadn't gone after them. He left them alone, knowing they both likely needed to talk after the events earlier in the night. Now that the heavier parts of the discussion were over with and a more relaxed setting was taking place, Steve headed down the hallway to see if they wanted to join. 

When he came to the far end of the hall, he noticed one of the bedroom doors was cracked. He listened for sound, but none came. As quietly as he could, he opened the door and peeked his head in. He saw both Bucky and Alex asleep on the bed, wrapped loosely in one another's arms with their heads resting together. 

A sense of calm filled Steve when he saw them. He tried to remember a time where his best friend seemed so at peace. It evoked a warmth in his chest, and it brought a smile to his face. 

Carefully, Steve closed the door and left the couple to sleep. 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Hello all! Just a quick drop-in to say hello and to thank everyone for the kudos, comments, messages, etc. They make my day, and the feedback is always appreciated. Thank you so much.**
> 
> **Now on to Chapter 12!******

The following morning, Alex shuffled sleepily out to the safe house kitchen area in hopes of finding a bottle of pain reliever and/or some coffee. Both were necessary, as her body felt like one giant knot and her sleep-hazed brain was still trying to wake up. She was thankful to smell the rich scent of brewing coffee as she made her way down the hallway. When she turned the corner, she found Thor standing in the kitchen. 

He rounded on his heels, his red cape swishing about his feet. Upon seeing Alex, he raised his cup gleefully. "Good morning, New One!" His expression faded slightly. "You _are _the new one, aren't you? I'm afraid I don't remember your name." 

Alex seemed to have surprised Thor as much as he surprised her, though his energy level far outmatched her own."My name's Alexis, but everyone calls me Alex. And yes, I am new." 

"Alexis, greetings. I am Thor Odinson." Thor extended his hand to shake hers, but Alex hesitated. 

"I don't know if you heard about my power" she said, apology in her tone, "but we probably shouldn't shake hands." 

"Ahhh, yes, right. I recall now." Thor retracted his hand and smiled. "Sorry about that." He quickly motioned towards the pot of coffee. "Would you care for a caffeinated beverage? I'm afraid I have to run, so what is left is most certainly yours." 

Alex still felt like she was a solid 60 seconds behind Thor, but her brain was catching up. She now noticed he was completely dressed in his full regalia, which made her suddenly self-conscious of her bed hair and the mess of clothes she'd changed in to late in the night. Instead of her suit, she now wore sleep shorts, a tank top, and a loose-fitting cardigan. It seems someone was kind enough to bring in the change of clothes that they'd all packed in the Quinjet, offloading hers by the door at some point in the night. 

Alex hugged the cardigan close to her, watching curiously as Thor moved about the kitchen. He was, by all standards, a large specimen of a man. His body looked like that of a typical god: chiseled from marble, sharp lines and perfect angles and all the standard fare that came with being flawless. Even the clear blue of his eyes and the lion-like hair that seemed to shimmer with sunlight spoke of his genetics. There was no doubt he was handsome, though Alex preferred men with a few more flaws. 

"You're staring" Thor mumbled over his mug. 

Alex blinked. "Oh, sorry." A nervous laugh escaped her, which she tried to play off by clearing her throat. "I just, uh...I've just never seen a god before." 

"I'm your first?!" He seemed pleased by this. 

"For lack of a better term, yes" she said with a smile. 

"Better you met me first than my brother, huh?" 

Thor laughed at this, but Alex didn't quite understand. It took her a second, but then she gave a long, slow nod. "Right, right - your brother is Loki?" 

"He's adopted, yes, but we claim him as our own. A royal pain in the arse, that one." 

Alex could only nod and smile. "Well, it's reassuring to hear that even gods have family problems." Now she was the one chuckling, whereas Thor remained expressionless. 

Feeling awkward once again under the scrutiny of his gaze, Alex helped herself to some coffee. She wished this conversation would have happened _after _she'd had her first cup. "So you said you're leaving soon?" She glanced over her shoulder as she added some sugar. 

"Duty calls, yes." Thor stood a little taller as he said this. "Asgard is in need of my presence. I come to your planet when needed, but spend most of my time ruling my people. Did you know I'm also a king?" 

"I figured it came with the territory" Alex mentioned. She dipped her finger in the coffee, tasted it, then added more sugar. "But congratulations on-" 

"-Oh no congratulations necessary, New One. It was an inheritance." He smiled, and his face lit up in a way that made him less godlike and more boyish. "I enjoy taking a break to come back and visit my friends here, though. Breaks up the monotony for me." 

He spoke so casually about saving their asses that Alex had to chuckle. "It's a good thing you do, because I'm not sure how we would have defeated those things yesterday. Thank you, by the way." 

"Not a problem at all. I was happy to help." 

His bouncy, accented manner of speech left Alex with a smile that was slow to disappear. She wondered how many others got to share a cup of coffee with a god the morning after a battle. If only her sister knew what she was doing right now- 

"-You're staring again" Thor mentioned. 

Alex sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Sorry." 

Thor studied the new Avenger with intrigue. She was pretty, with long hair like that of Jane's but much darker. She was quite fit. Very nice structure to her. Her expression had an edge to it; something he assumed was a result of the long battle and a restless night of sleep. He hadn't seen her in battle, but he could see she was a fighter. She was also quick-tongued. Overall, he liked her. Her and Loki would have likely gotten along. 

"So this power of yours..." Thor settled against the edge of the kitchen table. "They told me you can see into people's minds?" 

"It's true." Alex tried to smile, despite the concerned look on Thor's face. "I can see their memories, and can take on their personality traits, or in _our_case..." She motioned to the figurative group. "...I can transfer someone's super power into myself to use it." 

"How is this possible?" he asked. 

Alex snorted. "I wish I knew. I was born this way." 

"No super serum?" 

Alex shook her head. 

"No suit of iron?" 

Alex shook her head. 

Intrigued, Thor raised his eyebrows. "Ponderous." 

"Very" Alex said, taking a drink. 

Thor drained the rest of his coffee and set the mug on the table, face down. "It is a shame I cannot stay longer and get to know you more, New One. Alas, I must be off. Please tell the others I'll be ready to return should they need me for the next battle." 

Alex had been leaning against the sink this whole time, but now she stood. "Nice meeting you, Thor." 

"Likewise." 

She watched as he, his cape, his lion-hair, and his friendly smile took leave of the apartment. She waited, listening for the clap of thunder outside...and sure enough, there was a deep rumble, a flash of light, and then silence. 

Alex took her mug of coffee, filled another with coffee and left it black, then headed back down the hallway. To her pleasant surprise, Bucky was just stretching and yawning when she returned to their bedroom. She couldn't tell if it was just the size of the mattress or what, but when Bucky stretched, he took up the entire length of the bed. "Morning, Sleepy Head." 

"Is that coffee? Please tell me that's coffee" he mumbled drowsily. 

"Black. Hot. And made by Thor." 

This got him to smile. "Well then I _definitely _want it now." 

Alex handed over the mug and took a sitting position next to him. Bucky's large frame left little room, but this had worked to their advantage through the night. They remained wrapped in each other's arms for most of it, finding comfort in the other's touch. Now, however, Alex had to try and shimmy a little to even find room to sit cross-legged next to him. 

He still wore his compression gear, sleeping in the stretchy material through the night. It clung tightly to his muscles, which even at rest were a thing to marvel. When he took the mug from Alex, she couldn't help appreciate the flex of his bicep, outlined by the tight material. 

She found it particularly challenging to keep from admiring his compression pants, which hugged every single muscle he had below his waist with delicate accuracy. Her eyes ran along the meat of his thighs to the ample print just above them. In the back of Alex's mind, she almost heard Thor say _"you're staring". _This time she did it unapologetically. "How did you sleep?" she asked, pulling her eyes away from his waist. 

"Like a rock. You?" 

"Same." She gave him a smile. "I guess it _is _possible to get some decent sleep when we share a bed." She couldn't help but wiggle an eyebrow at him. 

Bucky's laugh was a deep rumble, still full of slumber. "I suppose you're right. Still isn't as much fun, though." 

"Not by a long shot" Alex agreed with a smirk. 

They sat quietly for a while, enjoying each other's company as they woke up further. It was a routine they'd developed back in New York anyway, so having something normal to fall back on after a very abnormal night felt good. 

When Bucky noticed Alex had that far-off look in her eyes, he nudged her gently. She came back to him, the chocolate of her eyes warming as they looked at him. "Hmm?" 

"Something bothering you?" 

Alex shrugged. "Not really." 

Bucky cocked his head, knowing very well something was bothering her. He'd been around her enough now to sense when her mind was getting to her. It was a trait they both shared, so he was privy to it every time he saw it. "You're still thinking about yesterday, aren't you?" 

"I am." 

"Which part?" 

"The collar." Her voice quaked a little. "I can still feel it." 

Bucky had no idea what a suppression collar must feel like for someone with Alex's type of power. He thought he'd seen all the nightmares a person could see in a lifetime. Unfortunately, life had a way of continually surprising him in this regard. There was still so much he didn't know existed in this world he was trying to navigate, and apparently mutant suppression collars were one of those things. 

"Not even just the pain of it" Alex continued. "I think it was the helpless feeling. That feeling of being totally powerless. Not just with my actual powers, but in a way that I couldn't help myself. I couldn't help _you _guys. It was the first time I ever truly felt hopeless." 

If anyone could understand, it was Bucky. He reached up and gently massaged the back of Alex's neck, hoping to replace the feeling of the collar with the comfort of his hands. He was happy to feel her relax a little under his touch, so he continued to rub in slow circles. "I have some thoughts about all this, if you'd like to hear?" 

Alex smiled. "There's no one I'd rather hear thoughts from." 

He blinked shyly, still not used to the compliments. "If it's the helpless feeling that scares you, we can fix that. We can train together...you and I. Every day we'll work on something until you perfect it. I can teach you to fight without your powers. We'll practice shooting. Martial arts. I'll teach you how to identify a threat without feeling it in your power first. So, if you ever lose them again..." He gave her a smile and squeezed her neck. "Then maybe you'll have some tools to fall back on." 

"You're willing to do all of that?" she asked, floored by his kindness. 

"For you, I'd do anything." 

The gentleness in Bucky's expression and the tone of his voice brought comfort to Alex. It wrapped around her like a blanket, warm and soothing and secure. The fact that he was willing to give his time and energy to helping her like this meant the world to her. And that's just how it was with them: each trying to help the other overcome what caused them pain. They were every bit the team they claimed to be, but something much deeper had built a foundation there. Initially, Alex was drawn to Bucky's rugged good looks; the broody, dark face and bright eyes that yearned for someone to understand. Maybe he'd done the same with her, who knows. But that day they laid their hands on one another and they got a taste of the unique bond between them...she had no idea she'd be sitting in a safe house somewhere in Nepal, truly and utterly falling in love with him. 

Those emotions threatened to surface when Alex looked down at her sleep shorts, picking at them idly with a dumb smile on her face. "You know, when I first met you, I had no idea we'd end up here. Us saving one another, both literally and figuratively, and doing it because we cared about one another more than we ever expected." Her eyes lifted and met his. 

"I'm glad we made it here." 

She smiled. "I'm glad we made it here, too." 

Bucky leaned forward and, as he always did, nuzzled his nose to hers. "So is that a yes for the training?" With his lips so close to hers, he was practically smiling against her mouth. 

Alex playfully shoved his shoulder. "Of course it is." 

"Smart girl." 

Alex could see the grey flecks dancing amongst the clear blue of Bucky's eyes. His gaze was mixed with desire but also with promise. When their lips met, Bucky gave life to that promise. It began as a slow embrace but grew stronger when they tasted what they'd been missing the past few days. Alex truly savored the soft caress of his mouth, the way his short beard tickled her skin, but more so the feeling behind it that strengthened with each kiss. 

And for the time being, with Bucky's hand cupped behind her neck and his tongue sweeping across hers, the haunted feeling of the collar disappeared. 

* * *

Bruce Banner's analysis of the sample Tony took from one of the creatures revealed alarming results. The sample showed the creature to be a manipulated cross between organic matter and the alien race Chitauri. The Chitauri were no stranger to the Avengers, but to hear that Hydra had begun testing manipulations of the Chitauri genes with quadrupeds on earth left them speechless. 

Questions arose, more discussions were had, and the sample was shipped off to S.H.I.E.L.D. From here, only fear of the unknown was left to grapple with. How many more facilities were creating these things? What kinds of resistance was Hydra breeding into them? What was their ultimate goal? 

These questions sat heavy in the minds of the Avengers, but it also drove Alex to work even harder with Bucky on their agreed-upon plan. After arriving back to New York, they wasted no time in starting their training together. The first morning after getting back, they dressed in their workout clothes and headed to the Practice Room to begin their first lesson: hand-to-hand combat. 

Alex felt just a hint of her nerves rising to the surface as she got ready for her first round of training. Not just because she was working on something whose undercurrent originated in being helpless without her powers, but more so because she was working with Bucky. Not because he was her boyfriend, and not because he wasn't in tune with her or expected more from her than she could give, but because he was intimidating. He was a warrior, and a damn skilled one. Standing there in a red workout tank, black pants, and his hair tied back, he was every bit the man she was falling in love with. But this was his area of expertise. His arena. And he was a formidable training partner. Alex couldn't help but feel a little green next to him. 

They began on simple martial art moves that Alex was used to; striking, kicking, and melee. From there they moved into more advanced movements and techniques. Alex was a quick-learner, and Bucky was wholly impressed with how much she knew already. But he didn't go easy on her. She wanted him to be as real with her as possible, no loopholes, no excuses. So Bucky did just that: he put her in hard locks, her grappled her to the ground, and he caught her multiple times in sets that she couldn't break herself out of. She was receptive to criticism, and took it all with an open mind and with determination to do better. 

After one particularly challenging move, Alex bent to catch her breath. Bucky was hardly winded, but he gave her a chance to collect herself while he grabbed a drink. He offered her his water bottle, which she gladly took. 

"You're a natural at this," he told her. "I think we'll be advancing to melee weapons in no time." 

Alex smiled as she chugged the water. "You're kind, but you don't have to be." 

"No, I mean it. Every word of it." He wiped back a piece of stray hair. "We've been at this for two hours and you haven't slowed yet." 

She handed him back the bottle. "Is that your hint you want to quit?" 

"Quit?! Who said anything about quitting?" 

Alex watched him squirt water onto his sweaty face, admiring the flex of his abs when he wiped the excess off with the hem of his tank. "If you keep showing off how hot you look all sweaty and shit, I may need to quit for other reasons." 

"I knew there had to be another reason you agreed to this" he joked. 

"Hey! I'm taking this very seriously!" 

Bucky aimed the bottle at her and gave her a squirt. "I'm teasing, doll." Alex reached for the bottle but he quickly withdrew his hand. He challenged her with another squirt, but she turned away in laughter. 

The truth was, Bucky was enjoying his training with Alex for more reasons than helping her. He loved the way she fought. She was aggressive, with sharp movements and a gleam in her eye that would make others fearful at its sight. She also clearly enjoyed it. The more she enjoyed it, the more gratification Bucky found in it. 

Not to mention...all of it turned him on. 

He knew that determined look in her dark eyes; it was the same look she had when she was riding him. He knew the playful smirk on her face when they worked on techniques together; it was the same smirk she wore when she worked his length with her mouth. Their training was like an extension of the love they made together, and it broadened the bond between them. 

After their short break, the pair moved on to take-down grapple moves, bringing their training down to the floor. Bucky went through the movements slowly at first, showing Alex the proper techniques. She was continually impressed by how well Bucky moved his body, so roped with muscle and shared by metal. Even in some of the positions, his metal arm offered no resistance. It was alluring for Alex, as much as it was fascinating. 

They continued to practice the moves until Alex was able to repeat the techniques fluidly. They didn't stop until she was able to pin Bucky to the ground in an immovable lock. It wasn't easy; he was twice her weight and half of that was metal, not to mention he spent most of his life perfecting the very training he was giving her. But she did do it, and Bucky was never prouder. 

With him successfully locked in a pinned position beneath her, Alex took a minute to admire the view from above. "I do believe that is checkmate, Sergeant Barnes." 

Bucky laughed through labored breaths. "Is it?" He felt the slightest hint of movement in Alex's hold, letting him know she had begun to let her guard down. Because of this, he was able to roll her over in one swift move and pin her to the ground. She gazed up at him in utter shock, but Bucky could see the start of a laugh brewing in her expression. "Rule number one: never let your guard down. The minute you _think_you've won, you're one minute closer to losing." 

He released his hold on her, but Alex remained flat on her back on the floor. "I'm so dumb..." 

"You're not dumb whatsoever." He crawled over her, sweeping her arms above her head and pinning them there. "You are, however, very sexy when you're pinned beneath me." 

He kissed the hollow of her neck and Alex squirmed. She felt his fingers squeeze inside hers, reinforcing his grip as his mouth kissed along the length of her neck to her jaw. "Something tells me you just like it when you have control" she murmured. 

Bucky smiled against her skin. "Maybe a little of that too." 

He drew the tip of his tongue along the middle of her throat before his mouth latched on to hers. He ground his hips against her, and Alex felt the full extent of his desire. A tiny whimper escaped, proving she wanted everything he was letting her feel. Bucky silenced her whimper as his lips drew the last amount of resolve she had left. 

"We should grab a shower." 

"Great idea" Bucky exhaled, his lips finding their way back to Alex's. He tasted her glorious mouth one more time, then stood. 

Alex barely opened her eyes before she felt his metal hand grab hers, yanking her swiftly to her feet. A grin broke across Bucky's face, his eyes alive with mischief. He wrapped an arm around her waist and in one go, slung her over his shoulder. Her surprised laughter filled the Practice Room, echoing off the walls. 

"Excuse me!" she exclaimed from behind. "Not fair! Not fair at all!" 

Bucky's grin stayed plastered across his face as he carried her to the exit. "Not fair?" He started to laugh as she limply struggled. 

"JAMES BARNES." 

"Yes?" He opened the door and exited into the hallway, Alex still dangling over his shoulder. 

"Put me down!" 

"Why, when this is so much more fun?" He heard her sigh behind him, so he patted her shapely bottom. "I'll make it up to you in the shower." 

A few seconds passed in silence. 

"Promise?" she asked. 

Bucky's grin grew. "Promise." 

* * *

Tony stood in his office, hand on his chin, watching the security monitors that overlooked the Practice Room. He'd been watching Barnes and Markos for the past ten minutes, purely out of curiosity. Without audio, it seemed they they were practicing combat moves of some kind. He didn't pay attention to all that stuff, so he had no idea what their goal was...but it appeared that Barnes was the instructor and Markos was the student. There was some flirtation, but it was mostly serious. 

He hadn't meant to watch them. In fact, he was so busy finishing up the Thimphu mission reports that he only noticed someone was even in the Practice Room when he'd gotten up to take a piss. He halted when he saw who it was and what they were doing and now he was fascinated. All his suspicions seemed to be true: that they were a couple, and whatever Markos was doing behind the scenes was working on Barnes. _This _was what truly intrigued him. He never did get a confirmation Markos was doing her little trial and error experiments on Barnes. At this point though, with the changes he was seeing in Barnes, it was becoming more obvious. 

And it made Tony wonder: _did I miss an opportunity when she asked me try it with her? _He'd been mulling it over for the past few weeks, haunted by the chance of trying something experimental and turning it down because he was afraid. Afraid of what? Afraid of her seeing whatever might be in him that he needed to let go of? And did he _want _to let go of such things? The pain he carried with him _drove _him. The mistakes he'd made in life had shaped him. If he got rid of all of those... 

"What did I tell you about watching people on the cameras?" Pepper said as she walked into the office. 

Pulled from his thoughts, Tony glanced over his shoulder. "I'm not watching. I'm _studying_." 

She floated past him, the subtle click of her heels breaking up the silence. She placed some files down on the growing stack that Tony was ignoring and crossed her arms. "What exactly are you studying, then?" 

"Barnes and the new girl. They're apparently a thing, you know." 

"Are they?" Pepper took a few steps closer to the monitors, watching as the couple on the camera practiced fighting together. She cocked her head slowly to the side as they performed a kick move that made her legs hurt just watching it. "Have they gone public with it?" 

Tony made a face. "Look at him, Pep. He's _smiling_." He blinked in emphasis. "Barnes is _smiling_. That's all the confirmation you need, if you ask me." 

"That's good, then." 

"Of course it's good - it's just unheard of." He turned his attention back to the monitors. 

"So are they training together for fun? Or is this some sort of weird super hero bonding thing?" Pepper asked. 

Tony gave her a smirk. "If I had to guess, it's because of what happened on the mission." He said this and watched a look of concern tighten Pepper's fair features. "I wasn't around to see it, but the word is she was taken prisoner at the facility and they used some sort of collar on her to subdue her powers." 

"That's _awful_." Pepper looked back at the monitor, watching Alexis in a new light. "So she wants to make sure that if it happens again..." 

"...she won't be as helpless" Tony finished. He looked at Pepper with shared sympathy. "That's my guess, anyway." 

They both stared at the monitor, watching as the couple executed some intense movements together. Bucky and Alex's matching dark stares were evident on the screen as they went through the movements, both incredibly focused and in tune with one another. When they broke apart, Tony pointed excitedly. "See? Look at that! That's a _smile_." 

Pepper rolled her eyes and laughed. "Cut him a break, would you?" She nudged Tony in the arm. "And would you please stop eavesdropping on them?" 

"I told you, I'm studying." 

"_Tony..._" 

"What!?" He let out a frustrated sigh, then turned the monitor off. "There. Happy?" 

"Thank you" she replied politely. 

"You know, I've been thinking..." He propped himself on the edge of the desk, one leg dangling. "Remember the proposition I told you Alexis brought to me when she first got here? About the trial run she wanted to test out with me?" 

Pepper squinted, a smirk appearing. "Yes..." 

"What if I did it?" He opened his hands and shrugged. "What if I let her try what she's _obviously _been doing to Barnes and it's been working? What if she has the power to-" 

"-Hold on a second." She held up a hand, her bracelets jingling. "I thought you said you'd never let another person, let alone - hmm, what'd you say? A _complete stranger _\- look into your past and invade your privacy like that?" 

Tony blew a raspberry. "Can't a person have a change of heart? Besides - she's not technically a stranger anymore." 

Pepper shook her head, then turned to leave the office. "Please do something about that stack of paperwork, would you?" 

Tony followed her with his eyes. "Where ya going?" 

She got one foot out the door, then pointed towards the pile on the desk. "Finish the paperwork, Tony." 

"What about my change of heart?!" 

"Finish the paperwork and we can talk about it later tonight." She gave him a final, overly-polite wave and then left the office. 

Tony sat on the edge of the desk with his shoulders slumped in defeat. He stared at the pile of folders and the endless paperwork, then looked back at the monitor. Eyeing the door to make sure Pepper was truly gone, he hurried up and clicked the monitor back on. 

To his disappointment, the couple was gone. 

* * *

Bucky pinned Alex against the wall of his shower, his body clinging to hers as he thrusted rhythmically. Alex closed her eyes and felt through the sensations; the feel of Bucky's tongue rolling her nipple in his mouth, the cold wall of the shower, the hot water running over them, her hands deep in his wet hair. Her need for him made her tighten her legs around his waist, pulling him deeper inside her. He responded with a throaty groan as he mouthed the soft flesh of her breast. The depth of his voice rumbled against her already sensitive skin, eliciting a moan of her own. 

With a hand braced at the base of her neck, Bucky drove himself home in those final minutes of their shower. There was hardly a whisper of space between them. Their slick bodies moved as one, their panting the only sound besides the running water. Alex could feel Bucky nearing his ledge, the muscles of his body clenching as he approached his release. He muttered her name against her neck, and Alex clung to the broad pane of his back. She tightened her legs around him even more, feeling her body clutching at his thickness. Alex rode through Bucky's orgasm with a drunken smile on her face, getting all her pleasure from giving him so much of it. His body felt incredible, his size filling her in ways no one ever did. But the look he gave her afterward, when his eyes wandered back to hers and seemed to gain their focus back after the lust, gave Alex the best feeling of all. Tiny water droplets clung to his eyelashes, making his eyes appear even bigger than they already were. She reached up and smoothed his wet hair out of the way. A tired smile played at his lips, and she kissed the water from them. 

When the pair finished and they finally exited the shower, they dressed in comfy clothes and spent the rest of the late afternoon relaxing in Bucky's apartment. After eating dinner, they found themselves in his living room. Alex sat perched on the couch while Bucky sat on the floor in front of her. He sat between her legs, writing in his notebook while she played with his hair. 

At one point, Bucky leaned his head back and closed his eyes, taking a moment from writing just to enjoy the feel of Alex's hands in his hair. Her nails weren't long by any means, but each time she raked them gently over his scalp, he felt completely at ease. When he opened his eyes again, he saw Alex smiling down at him. 

"Feel good?" 

He smiled with his eyes. "Mmmmm hmm." 

"I'm only very slightly obsessed with your hair." 

"Are you?" Bucky was pleasantly surprised. "It's always been one of those things I just never paid much attention to." 

Alex gathered some of his longer side pieces, then drug her nails from his forehead backward, gathering more. She slipped an elastic hair band from around her wrist and tied the bunch of hair into a ponytail at the top of his head. When she saw it, she began to laugh. 

"I can tell without even seeing it that I look dumb right now" he uttered with some humor. His eyes flicked upward at Alex as she removed the hair tie. 

"Sorry, I just had to..." 

Bucky's grin only grew larger. "Play as much as you'd like, doll. I don't mind." He picked up his pen and went back to writing, pleasantly distracted by Alex's hands as they worked through his hair. 

Alex glanced over his shoulder from above. "You keep a journal?" She began to section his hair into three pieces. 

"Kind of... It's not a daily thing. Just whenever I have a memory, or think I feel something from my past surfacing, I try and write it down." 

"How long have you been doing it?" 

Bucky felt a little ashamed of his answer, but wanted to be truthful. "I guess it's been a while now. It started long before my recovery...when I broke away from Hydra. At first, it was just little things. My middle name. My favorite food. My favorite subject in grammar school. Stuff like that. It's gotten better since then." 

Alex understood all too well. After helping to remove some of the layers of his hurt, she hoped he was finding it easier to piece together the scattered fragments of his past. "Would you say writing it down has helped you remember more?" she asked, beginning to braid his hair. 

"Yes. It was all I had for a long time." 

Even without seeing his face, Alex could tell it was somewhat of a hard subject for him. At the very least, it evoked a part of his past that had been an incredible struggle. She didn't want to push him into talking about it if he didn't want to. It was a private corner of his life and one she wanted to respect. If anything, she hoped their trial runs together helped him add more entries. 

She tipped Bucky's head backward so she could see his eyes. "I think it's awesome, babe." She kissed his forehead, turning the tight line of his mouth back into a smile. 

"Thank you." He closed his eyes again, a faint hint of the smile still lingering on his lips as Alex continued to braid. The rhythmic feel of her nails and the gentle tug of his hair could have lulled him to sleep. When Alex finished, her soft giggle made him open his eyes. 

"You should probably take a look at this masterpiece" she told him. 

Bucky grabbed his phone and opened the front-facing camera. He saw two little messy braids on each side of his head, the bottoms flaring outward. He also saw Alex biting her lip to keep from laughing. 

"Pretty sexy, huh?" she said, holding back a snort. 

"Oh, by _far _the best I've ever looked." 

Alex ruffled up the braids until his hair fell freely about his shoulders again. She began to try another look on him, running her fingers through his hair to start. "You know, I always wanted to do this with someone before and never could." 

"Because of your powers?" He looked up to see Alex nod. 

"I used to watch my mom play with my sister's hair all the time when we were little." She twisted a few pieces of Bucky's hair between her fingers. "I would get so jealous of her, too. Even though I knew it wasn't my sister's fault my mom would never come near me, I just wanted so badly for someone to braid or curl my hair for me. Something so simple, you know?" 

Bucky tried to picture Alexis as a young girl, alone and sad and confused by something she had no control over. An ache formed in his chest, realizing how hard it must have been for her. He couldn't truly imagine what it was like. 

"Anyways..." Alex shrugged off the memory. "Didn't mean to get heavy and ruin the moment." 

Bucky curled his arm around the calf of her leg and leaned his head against it. "You didn't ruin anything, believe me. It makes me think of my own sisters and how they used to tease me-" He trailed off, blinking in surprise. 

Alex watched as Bucky turned and looked at her, his mouth hanging open slightly. "What's wrong?!" she asked. 

The shock on Bucky's face transformed into a look of pure excitement. "Alexis!" He got on his knees in front of her, his hands grabbing her thighs. "Did you hear what I just said?!" 

"About your sisters?" 

Bucky nodded, a full-blown grin exploding across his face. " _I remember my sisters." _He cupped Alex's face in his hands, overcome by joy. "I had sisters. Three of them. I _remember _them." 

Alex now realized the full significance of the moment. "You didn't remember them until now?! This is amazing!" 

"I _remember _them," Bucky repeated, shocked. "I couldn't remember before, but now I can see their faces." 

They stared at one another for a moment. Bucky let out an exhale that was mixed with an astonished laugh, and then threw his arms around Alex. She cupped the back of his head, squeezing him in her arms. "I'm _so _ happy for you, James." 

Bucky stayed in Alex's arms, unable to believe the memory that had just come back to him. It was one of the biggest memories he had yet. He could see the faces of his little sisters. He remembered them teasing him for a bad haircut his mother had given him. They all shared one bedroom. He could see that bedroom. The memory was there in his mind as clear as any recent memory. 

And he had Alexis to thank for all of it. 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Slight trigger warning: No spoilers, but there is discussion of anxiety and/or panic-related language within this chapter.**

A week passed since the Avengers returned from the Thimphu mission. Bucky and Alex continued to train every day, sometimes for hours at a time, working on a myriad of techniques from martial arts to weapon handling. They also went for morning runs together, mostly just to get out of the compound for a while and to enjoy the final days of the fall season. 

Behind the scenes, Bruce Banner continued his research on the sample of the Chitauri-mixed monster. He provided all reports to scientists at S.H.I.E.L.D, who continued to grill him on all the possibilities Hydra could be doing to produce these creatures. It got to a point where Bruce felt that some of the S.H.I.E.L.D. scientists seemed to be more interested in what the discovery of these creatures may do for S.H.I.E.L.D what the Avengers could do about _removing _the creatures. Finally, Bruce had to ask for help. He turned to Tony and Steve, asking if they would join him during the next teleconference call to get a taste of what was occurring. 

And so the three men found themselves in the conference room, with Steve sitting alongside Bruce and Tony. Instead of the scientists, however, it was now Nick Fury, Maria Hill, and some of the other directors at S.H.I.E.L.D. All three of the present Avengers discussed the various theories they came up with to explain the findings of the Chitauri-mixed monsters they fought, as well as the facility they raided. The directors of S.H.I.E.L.D. spent the majority of the teleconference thereafter asking Bruce further questions on the tests he ran. 

For most of the call, Fury had remained silent. When Bruce went into depth about the genetic cross found in the monster sample Tony had taken, his stature changed as he sat forward in his chair. "We need to come up with some kind of plan in the interim." He looked at his colleagues, then his electronic image turned to the three Avengers. "We know these things are being created _somewhere_. We'll find out where, just give us some time. In the meantime, you have _got _to get yourselves a fail-proof system when you encounter them again. And yes, you _will _encounter them again" he repeated with emphasis, his slow drawl coming to a pointed end. When no one said anything, his gaze then settled on Tony. "You've been awfully quiet, Stark. No ideas yet on how to tackle this?" 

Tony shook his head. "Can't say. Without a lock on where they're being made, I'm not sure how we're supposed to handle it." He looked to Steve and Bruce. "Among the group, we agreed to take it on a case by case basis. If they release 'em somewhere, we'll be there. Until then?" He lifted his hands. "Not sure how you get ahead of something like this." 

"Let's say we call you after a release is detected" Fury proposed. "What then? How do you defeat them? You can't call Thor and expect him to pick up the pieces every time." 

"Why not?" Tony asked simply. 

"His response time from Asgard to Earth was approximately 20 minutes." Fury shook his head. "Not good enough." 

"We already know they're susceptible around the head; mostly in the throat, if you can get them open" Steve added. "That's a good start. We can utilize Barton's skilled aim, Tony's repulsers, and Barnes' sharp shot. Everyone else, we can train. Plus...we have Markos. She can mirror anyone's skill." 

Fury settled back in his chair. "Yes, we do have Markos." He began nodding to himself as an idea formulated in his mind. 

Steve saw the change in his expression. "What are you thinking?" 

"Let's pretend for a moment you all get called out to a release somewhere. And let's say you were able to catch one of these creatures..." Fury shrugged coolly. "What's stopping us from having Markos mirror one of the Chitauri?" 

In the chair next to him, Maria met Fury's gaze with question. In the conference room, the three Avengers remained utterly silent. Only Steve made any movement in response to the proposition. 

"You think turning one of our own into one of _theirs _is a good idea?" Steve asked incredulously. 

"She'd still be _ours_, Rogers. Her allegiance won't change - just her composition. We'd be using Hydra's own weapon against them, but better." 

Steve began to grind his teeth. "How is that possibly any better?" He sat forward now, his jaw as tight as the lines of his forehead. "Tell me how risking one of our own is in any way better than what Hydra is doing?" 

Fury remained staring at Steve with an unwavering intensity. "She's got the spirit and dedication of an Avenger, but she'd be equipped with the indestructibility of the Chitauri. I don't see how we can pass up this chance." 

"I hate to be the Debbie Downer here" Tony interjected, "but Markos barely has enough control over herself and her powers yet. If she mixes herself with whatever the Chitauri are made of, it could be bad. _Very _ bad." 

A moment of silence hung in the office. Maria looked down at her lap. The other agents looked at Fury. 

"I can't agree to this." Steve shook his head firmly. "I don't see how any of us can." 

"All I'm asking is for you to _try_." Fury's dark stare settled on all three of them. "The next time we find a batch of these things, your orders will be to capture one. Bring it back to the lab. Test it. Test Markos on it. See what happens." 

"And what happens if it goes wrong? What happens if Markos does a successful transfer and turns in to one of them and stops being one of us?" The doubt in Steve's voice was palpable. His blue eyes flicked between Tony, Bruce, and those at S.H.I.E.L.D, waiting on an answer. 

A moment of hesitation passed before Fury gave a shrug. "You control it, and then you stop it." 

"But _how_?" Bruce asked. 

"With a suppression collar" Fury answered simply. 

* * *

Alex stood with her legs anchored evenly on the ground, both hands positioned securely on the body of the large rifle. She braced herself for the kickback, aimed at the first target, and fired. Each target she hit changed to a new one, in a new position. The automatic rifle blew through dozens of rounds, repeatedly jarring Alex's body as she changed aim at the revolving targets. Her focus never wavered. When all fifteen targets were blown to pieces, she lowered the gun. 

Behind her, Bucky started clapping. "Amazing job!" 

Alex removed her noise-cancelling headset. She turned around and lifted her hands in the air in triumph. "Finally! Success!" 

"Finally!?" Bucky came forward and high-fives her two extended hands. "You were nailing most of them all morning anyways! So what if the last three were a little more difficult?" 

Alex couldn't help it. She had to smile. She felt pretty damn good for how well she did with the rifle she used. It was heavy, awkward to hold steady, and the kick was enough to leave bruises if she wasn't careful. "Okay, maybe you're right..." she teased. 

"Of course I'm right." Bucky drew Alex into his arms and gave her a kiss that was full of congratulation. "Now on to the real test: grenade launchers." 

They began training earlier that morning in the Avengers indoor shooting range. Alex started with smaller handguns, all of which she was already used to wielding. Those targets were easy for her, so they moved on to automatic rifles. This last one proved to be the most difficult for her, so they'd been working on it for much longer. Bucky was an A+ instructor, though. He taught her all the tricks she needed to succeed in addition to the basics. In no time, she'd managed to hit all her targets dead-on, and it wasn't even Noon yet. 

"So what's the deal with these?" Alex stood with her hands on her hips, watching as Bucky brought out another massive-looking rifle. He lifted it with ease, but she knew it'd be a different story for her once she picked it up. 

"This one might hurt, so remember what I said about locking your hips." He handed Alex the gun. "Similar set-up: keep one hand on the barrel, the other on the trigger. The key is, the magazine's a little different, so..." He gave a little tug on her ponytail. "May want to make sure this is out of the way or else it may get caught." 

Alex grimaced. "Ouch. No thank you." She immediately wound the length of her hair up into a messy bun on the top of her head. "Better?" 

Bucky's smile widened. "Like a pretty little bad ass." 

Alex took the gun, but not before she rolled her eyes. "Hold all compliments until I hit these targets, please." 

"Fine. Fine." Bucky got in position behind her, watching her posture for correct form. "Okay, bring the nose a little lower..." He wrapped his arms around hers, guiding her and the rifle into the perfect position. "You'll want it about here. The grenade will naturally cause the barrel to move upwards when it's fired, so it's easy to overcompensate at first." 

Holding a rifle was one thing, but holding a rifle with a damn grenade attached to it was another. It freaked Alex out, but she put on a confident face. Her life, or Bucky's, might very well depend on her excelling at these target lessons. And yet, even with the gravity of this in her mind, Alex found herself drawn to the strangely powerful way Bucky instructed her. The dichotomy of his soft voice and gentle instruction combined with his knowledge and talent stirred something primal inside her. Maybe it was the way Bucky guided her, his body tight against hers, his mouth near her ear telling her what to do and showing her how. Maybe it was the massive gun and the power behind it. There was just something dominant about Bucky in this role. Whatever it was, Alex felt her body responding even as she struggled to maintain focus. 

"There you go. Perfect." Bucky slowly let his hands drop away from hers. "Not too heavy?" 

"Not really. Not yet_, _anyway." She glanced over her shoulder, a soft smile playing at her lips. "How do I look?" She was flirting now and she didn't care. She wanted more of his attention before getting down to business. 

Bucky looked her over and raised one eyebrow. "Still needs a little adjustment." He stepped into her again, his chest tight against her back. "This might be instructor preference, but...I'd prefer your hips to be here." His hands guided her waist flush against his, and Alex's back naturally arched in response. Their size difference worked; like two puzzle pieces fit snugly together. "Better?" 

"I can feel a difference already" Alex purred, his dick hardening against her ass. 

He smiled against her ear. "My _student_isn't focusing." 

"Because my _teacher _is distracting me." 

Their mouths found one another, giving in to the heat sparking between them. Bucky ground his hips against Alex's backside, holding her in place so she had no where to go but to feel the effect she had on him. In doing so, they both ended up feeling Bucky's cell phone as it began to vibrate in the pocket of his pants. They ignored it at first, but the phone kept ringing and the vibrations kept increasing with each ring. 

"Dammit" he breathed, half laughing at the timing. "Sorry." 

Alex tried to calm her racing heart as Bucky fished the phone out of his now-tightened pants. She licked her lips, still tasting him and still wanting him, even as he frowned down at the screen. "What is it?" 

"Steve." 

"Is everything okay?" 

"Yeah. Did you get a message about a meeting at 1?" 

Alex shook her head. "No, but let me make sure I didn't miss something." Upon checking her own phone, she shook her head again. "I've got nothing on my end. What's going on?" 

Bucky stared down at the message Steve had sent him, re-reading it for the third time: 

_ Private meeting at 1300 hours with some of the others. We'll meet in the conference room. And as a heads-up, try and keep an open mind about what we're going to discuss. See ya, Buck. _

"I guess there's a meeting. Not sure what it's about, though." Bucky stared at the message. Something didn't sit right in his mind. The way Steve phrased the text. He used his nickname. He gave him a warning, which meant he was looking out for him in some way. Something was off. 

"Guess this one doesn't involve me, then" Alex replied. 

Bucky shoved the phone back in his pocket. "Lucky you." He tried to smile, even though his gut was now wound into a knot. 

"Alright, back to it, Lover Boy." Alex turned and raised the rifle once more, mimicking the posture Bucky taught her. "I got some grenade launching to do before you have to leave." 

Alex's attitude encouraged Bucky, and it made him happy to hear, but his mind was stuck on the message he received. He wondered if he should text Steve back and ask him for clarification, or if it was even worth it. If it was something bad, he would have came and found him. He could always guarantee that with Steve. Whatever it meant, he still owed it to Alex to finish their lesson. That was the most important part of his day, and it still would be. 

He watched as Alex placed her headset on and raised the gun. She gave him a nod, signalling she was ready. Bucky moved back to the control desk and when Alex was ready, he began the sequence of moving targets. Even with the padded, sound-absorbing walls of the indoor shooting range, the grenade gun was hellishly loud. Alex couldn't help but laugh as she landed all three of her targets. She gave Bucky a thumbs-up from the shooting stall. 

Bucky gave her a round of applause, but his mind was stuck on the message. 

* * *

The meeting in the conference room at 1300 hours consisted of Steve, Tony, Bruce, and Natasha only. When Bucky entered the room, he immediately sensed tension among the four that were sitting there. Only Nat gave him a smile when he entered. 

"Thanks for coming" Steve told him. He could already see Bucky's expression was tight with concern. His body language was full of reserve, moving cautiously and with little eye contact. He was dressed in a gray long sleeve shirt and dark jeans, and he appeared freshly showered. His hair was still damp in some places, which Steve noted as he took a seat next to him. Still, he could feel a dark cloud surrounding his friend. 

"So what's this about?" Bucky's eyes passed over each of their faces. "And why isn't the whole group here?" 

"You'll find out soon enough" said Steve. 

Bucky did his best not to comment. The vagueness was making him paranoid, so whatever this meeting was about, he just wanted it over with. He looked to Steve for an indication that would ease his mind, but his face gave nothing away. He looked at Tony next, who he sat fiddling with his watch and avoided all eye contact. Bruce and Nat sat patiently; Nat clicking the pen she had in her hand rhythmically. 

After a few additional minutes of waiting, the image of Nick Fury appeared on the screen at the head of the room. He wore his usual black attire, straightening his suit coat as he took a seat before them. "Greetings, Avengers. Thanks for agreeing to meet on short notice." He paused, adjusting his eye patch slightly. "It's come to our attention that these Chitauri-animal hybrids pose a significant threat not just to civilians across the globe, but to our very own team. While I can assure you that S.H.I.E.L.D. is doing everything in its power to locate where Hydra is creating these things, the minute we locate them, we'll be sending you to the location in an attempt to secure one." 

Bucky thought he heard this incorrectly. He glanced at the others, but no one seemed alarmed. 

"When you have successfully captured one of the hybrids, you'll be instructed to bring it to D.C. where we'll proceed to study it. Bruce Banner will join us for that time, aiding us with that phase of the mission." With this, Fury reached off to his side, bringing a folder into view for the others. "Stark has copies of the mission instructions, which he'll to pass out towards the end of this call. The team assembled here in this room is the team tasked with bringing back one of the hybrids for study. Once that happens, we'll go from there and take it one day at a time. Any questions?" 

"Are you able to disclose if S.H.I.E.L.D. has any inkling where Hydra's main base of operations is yet?" Natasha asked. 

"We have an inkling, but it's not a strong one." 

"So realistically, the call may not come for a while?" 

"It may" Fury said. "And it may not. In either case, I'd be prepared for a quick departure." 

"By what means are we meant to bring the creature to D.C. once it's captured?" Bucky asked. 

"We're currently building a specialized containment crate for this purpose. It will be shipped to Avengers Headquarters as soon as it's completed." Fury waited a little while for any more questions, but none came. "I think now is a good time for Stark to hand out the folders." 

A stack of nondescript manila folders sat on a table near where Tony was sitting. He handed them out to those around the table. Bucky noticed Tony didn't even bother to open his folder...nor did Steve. 

Glancing inside his own, Bucky saw the standard paperwork that came with pre-mission documentation. He scanned those quickly, moving through the rest of the pile inside the folder. He came to a light pink paper that stood out among the others and pulled it out. 

_RELEASE FORM: AVENGER-HYBRID DATA COLLECTION EXPERIMENT_

_I,_ (print name here) _ , hereby authorize Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcement Logistics Division to conduct experiments on the yet-unnamed hybrid Chitauri species sample collected in Mission #37285. I hereby agree to participate, or agree to associate participation, of innocuous studies upon which the hybrid sample will be tested in conjunction with Avenger powers. _

"What's this?" Bucky lifted the paper, his voice laden with skepticism. 

"A precaution we're taking" replied Fury. 

Bucky scanned the lines of the document. "You want to run experiments between us and the creature? How would that even work?" 

"We already know Hydra is breeding them to resist specific Avenger powers" Fury explained. "What we don't know is if _every _Avenger's powers would be susceptible. Our hope is perhaps some other Avengers would be able to contribute to experiments and answer that question. By signing that paper, you're agreeing to the potential for such future testing." 

Bucky stared at the paper as Fury talked. When he mentioned '_other Avengers'_, his dark stare rose. "What do you mean _others_?" His stomach began to twist. He knew his thoughts were getting ahead of him, but he wanted to hear it from Nick Fury's mouth first before he allowed his mind to go in the dark direction it was already heading. "What _other _Avenger are you talking about here?" 

The room went uncomfortably quiet. Nat had stopped clicking her pen and set it down on the table out of reach. Steve glanced at Fury on the screen, whose hands had tightened about the arms of his chair. Steve's gut began to sink little by little. He _knew _this would happen. He saw it coming a mile away, and he tried to warn Fury. 

"We don't have any specific plans, Barnes. We're just trying to plan ahead in the event we ask-" 

Bucky slammed his metal fist on the table. "Do you think I'm fucking stupid?" 

Surprised by the outburst, Fury looked at Steve, whose mouth had set in a hard line. All Steve could do was shake his head. 

"You think I can't read between the lines?" Bucky stood from the table so hard, his chair flew back and hit the wall. He nearly crushed the paper in his hand as he pointed at the man on the screen. "You want to use Alexis for your little experiment, don't you? Not only that, you want _all of us _to agree to it before you even ask her!" 

"Take a _seat, _Barnes" Fury instructed. 

Bucky didn't listen, but stared at his best friend. "Did you know about this? Is this what you meant by having an open mind?" 

Steve exhaled, understanding his friend's reaction more than Bucky probably knew. "Nothing's guaranteed yet. Only _after _all other experiments are completed, would we ask Alexis to step in, _but only if she wanted to_." 

"We wouldn't ask Markos to do this if we thought there was a chance she would be hurt" Tony added. 

"So you knew about this too?" Bucky lowered his head and began to laugh softly to himself at the irony of it all. "How many others here knew about this?" 

Nat shook her head. "I didn't know about it, Bucky. And I'm actually surprised _you _came up with this, Fury." Her eyes hardened as she looked at him. "I respect you, Nick. I always have. But sometimes, I question the direction S.H.I.E.L.D. is heading." 

"I'm not the bad guy here, Romanoff." 

"Not yet" she said, hoping to make a point. 

Bruce leaned forward now, his face a mix of apprehension and regret. "None of us liked the idea at first. Steve tried to stop it all together, but...if there is _some _chance here that Alexis could discover something none of our tests can reveal, it might be worth us trying it." His eyes met Bucky's. "She's the first of her kind. We've never seen anyone with her abilities before, so we have to take new chances in order to find new discoveries." 

Steve stood and met Bucky eye-to-eye. "Listen Bucky, we can talk about it more afterward. For now, you need to trust us. _Trust me_. There are risks, yes. There always are." He looked at Natasha, whose respect he also didn't want to lose. They'd been through too much for her to doubt him now. "Ask Tony and Bruce; they can vouch for me here. I told Fury I wouldn't agree to this mission at all if he didn't ensure Alexis' safety, _and _guaranteeher consent. Fury put a signature to it and made it happen." 

All the eyes in the room turned and looked at Nick Fury. He sat in his chair, a hand rubbing his forehead in distress. "Rogers is correct. I agreed to his terms before this meeting, but I should have disclosed that ahead of time." 

Bucky's heart was hammering inside his chest. He was confused and angry and he felt backed into a corner. He _hated _feeling backed into a corner. It made his brain feel scrambled and frantic. Worse yet, Alex should have been there. She should have been the only person inside this conference room listening to this bullshit. The entire purpose of the mission seemed to hinge on her decision, and they didn't even have the gall to ask her to the meeting. Instead, they wanted _him _to sign a paper agreeing that he'd be fine with an experiment on _his girlfriend_. 

"I can't sign this." Bucky tossed the crumpled paper on the table. "And I won't sign it. Ever." He walked to the door of the office, but before he left, he turned and stared down Nick Fury. "I remember being treated like a lab rat. They told me it was in the interest of the organization. They told me what I was doing was right." He felt his throat tighten as he swallowed. "And they were _wrong_." 

The words he left the group with lay thick in the air, hovering over all of them long after he left. Steve could taste the guilt like bile on his tongue. He turned and faced the monitor where Fury sat looking exhausted. "You wouldn't listen to me. You just _had _to put that paper in there..." 

"Save me the speech, Rogers" Fury sighed. 

Steve lifted a finger towards the door. "The man that just left here would have done this mission without question. He would have done it without hesitation, like he's done so many other times for you when you've asked." He tried to take a breath, but his jaw wouldn't loosen. He normally didn't let his emotions get the best of him, but this time it was different. "Bucky would have done it all and wouldn't have complained _once_, but you went for the jugular. You threatened the _one person_he's got in his life that brings him any kind of happiness." 

Bruce, Nat, and Tony all sat with their eyes downcast. Nat didn't realize the extent of Bucky and Alexis' relationship, nor did Bruce. Tony had his guesses, but hearing Steve give voice to his emotions told him everything he needed to know. He glanced up to see Fury standing from his chair. 

"We'll talk about this privately tomorrow, Rogers. Until then: this mission's on hold." Fury walked up to the camera and looked into the eyepiece. "Meeting adjourned." 

He clicked off the camera and the screen went blank. 

* * *

Bucky stormed through the halls of the compound, aiming for the apartment wing but distracted by his chaotic thoughts. They were off and running now, far away from any control he could exercise over them. The anger had come too quickly. His fears rose to the surface far too suddenly. His emotions were disorganized; waffling between feeling betrayed, backed into a corner, and scared. His metal hand flexed repeatedly as he walked. The more intense his feelings, the tighter his hand balled into a fist. 

He bypassed the elevator that would take him up to his floor and opted for the stairs. In the solitude of the stairwell, Bucky fished out his cell phone and dialed Alex. His heart raced in his chest, and he began to feel the long-forgotten sensation of losing control. 

_Please pick up. Please pick up. _

He did his best to try and quell the quick surge of sensations, but he already knew he was heading down a path he'd been on before...back in Wakanda. Even back in Bucharest. He felt tingles begin in his flesh hand, radiating out from the elbow as he waited desperately for Alex to pick up. Finally, he heard her voice on the other end of the line. 

"Well hey there, Sergeant!" 

"Can you come over?" Bucky blurted, feeling heat rising into his face. He flexed his flesh hand, feeling it start to go numb. "I need you. I need to see you." 

There was a pause. "Is everything okay?" 

"I just need to see you" he repeated. "I'll be at my place in two minutes. Can you meet me there?" 

"Of course I will." 

"Thank you." He shut his eyes and exhaled, feeling a little control come back to him. "I'm sorry this is so sudden." 

"Don't be sorry, James. I'll be over soon." 

Alex hung up before he did. As Bucky headed back to his apartment, Alex rushed to leave hers. He was only back for a few minutes before he heard a knock on his door. When he saw Alex, he felt instant relief. 

They hugged, and Alex held his face in her hands. "What's wrong?" She looked him over, noticing a change in him that was drastic compared to how he was earlier in the day. His face was drawn now, with a shadow lingering over his eyes that aged him. There was also a fierceness present that hadn't been there before. To Alex, it wasn't totally unlike the ferocity with which he went into a mission. Recognizing this, she began to feel a little bit more nervous. 

"I haven't..." His breathing was so ragged his words came in bunches. "...felt this way since...since Wakanda..." 

"Let's sit down" Alex told him, guiding him to his couch. She cupped his face in his hands once more and forced him to look at her. "Focus on your breathing, James. It's just me and you here. Just us, okay? One breath at a time. Together." 

Bucky's jumbled thoughts and emotions raced. _ Fear. Fear they would take her. Fear of experiments. Fear that they would hurt her the way they had hurt him. They left him no choice. He'd never let them do this to her. She deserved better. _

"One breath at a time" Alex repeated, watching as dread filled Bucky's distracted gaze. "Focus." 

He nodded, but Alex could see the struggle in his eyes. They seemed so bleak; their color all but washed away. He looked at her with an embarrassment she could actually feel, but she smiled, tucking his hair back from his face. "Let me help you" she said, and Bucky nodded. 

Alex pressed the pad of her thumb in the middle of Bucky's forehead. She closed her eyes and focused on his emotions, isolating those that floated on the surface of his psyche. Her powers instantly locked on to them. Layer by layer, she removed his turbulent emotions. 

When she opened her eyes, Bucky's breathing was already coming down. "Better?" 

He tried to nod, but it was shaky. "I'm so sorry to make you-" 

"-you're not making me, James." 

"I didn't know who else to call..." 

"It's okay, you don't have to explain." Alex caressed the side of his face tenderly. "What did you tell me after the last mission? I don't have to be 100% with you all the time?" The sentiment brought a true smile to Bucky's face, and it warmed Alex's heart. "Same goes for you, babe." 

Hearing those words and feeling the reassurance in her touch, Bucky finally got control of his breathing. Alex noticed the redness in his face had slowly faded. Finally, her own heart started to slow its fearful hammering inside her chest. Bucky leaned forward slowly until his forehead pressed against Alex's. He exhaled tiredly and closed his eyes. 

"Thank you." 

Alex smiled. "You're welcome." 

They moved from the couch to the bed. They climbed in together, wearing exactly whatever they had on and not caring one ounce. Alex lay on her back with Bucky's head against her chest. She hugged him close; stroking his hair, caressing his face, running her fingertips along his back, whatever she could do to soothe him. 

"If you want to talk about it, I'll listen" she mentioned. 

"I don't. Not yet." He sighed, afraid that he sounded too harsh. "But I will." 

Alex rested her chin against his head. "That's fine. I just wanted you to know I'd be here for you, if you did." 

"Thank you." 

Bucky's voice sounded fragile. It amazed Alex how powerful and fierce he could be one moment, and so broken the next. She came to realize this was probably the norm for him when he was going through the worst of his recovery. It helped her to appreciate just how far he'd come; especially in just the time they've known each other. 

As she lay there with him, Alex began to wonder more about what could have possibly precipitated his panic attack. The missions she'd seen him on, even the worst parts of their most recent mission, hadn't evoked a response quite like this. She was aware enough to know that panic attacks often didn't need a reason. Given Bucky's traumatic background, Alex wasn't all that surprised to know he still had them. She was just glad she was here to help him. 

Next to her, Bucky shifted in her arms. Alex lowered her gaze to see his eyes were now closed, his long black lashes resting against his face. The lines around his mouth had eased. His full lips were just barely open a whisper, his body relaxed and softened by sleep. It made Alex happy to see and quieted her worrisome thoughts. 

Just before she dozed off, she thought she heard a knock at Bucky's door. It stirred her from the early shallowness of sleep, but not enough to warrant disrupting her or Bucky to get up and answer it. The knocks came again three more times before silence settled around the couple once more. Alex drifted back to sleep and thought no more of it. 


	14. Chapter 14

Bucky woke up the next morning tangled in a mess of his own bed sheets. He was lying on his stomach with his metal arm strewn over the side of his bed. It seemed to have locked during the night, so we he tried to roll over, it didn't move quite as well as the rest of him. He quickly realized it wasn't just his arm that was stiff; his whole body felt that way. Upon rolling onto his back, Bucky felt the leftover pain in his chest from his panic attack. It was a jarring soreness, like a weight had been left to crush his ribs all night. How quickly he'd forgotten the after effects of an attack in just the past few months.

Untwisting the sheets from around his waist, Bucky's eyes naturally moved to Alex lying next to him. She slept soundly on her side, unaware of how much he seemed to be struggling. And while he couldn't see her face, Bucky still thought she looked beautiful. Maybe it was the way she lay there curled in on herself, hugging the pillow innocently. Or maybe it was the curve from her shoulders to her hips and the way the sheets settled there. It made him want to snuggle in next to her and rest his arm in that curve, holding her close. Even her hair lay against his sheets like its own dark blanket, calling to his fingers to sink into its softness.

He laid there for a while, silently admiring her. What she did for him yesterday was just a small fraction of the impact she had on him. His entire life had changed for the better _because _she was in it. Bucky knew this was this reason he had a panic attack. His anger was the driving force behind it, but it originated from a deep fear he had of losing her.

The reason, of course, was because he loved her.

Before meeting Alex, Bucky didn't remember what love felt like. He'd gone so long without it; left only to travel a road where he felt nothing but pain and torture. The minute he even came close to remembering something that didn't bring him pain, they sent him back to the chair. Decades were spent teaching him that remembering good things only brought more pain. Love soon became a foreign subject; a curse word never to be used. Love wasn't something he could ever remember having in his life, besides the love he found in his friendship with Steve, but even that hadn't come easy.

After last night though, Bucky was positive he knew what love was. And he knew it because he _felt_it.

That feeling caused a small smile to creep across his face as he thought of it.

Doing his very best not to wake her, Bucky reached into his nightstand and brought out his notebook. He made a quick entry while he was still in the moment:

_ Really bad night last night. Had my first panic attack in months._  
_Too many flashbacks of being tortured. Of being cornered. Of being without a choice._  
_I remembered feelings I never wanted to feel._  
_I let my fears take control._  
_I hope I didn't set my progress back too far. I accept responsibility for it if I have._  
_ It comes down to this: I'm afraid to lose Alexis, and it's because I love her.  
At least I can feel love again._

Bucky placed the notebook back in its secret compartment and closed the drawer. Slowly, he inched out from beneath the bed sheets so as not to wake Alex. When he successfully made his way out of the bedroom, he closed the door behind and headed out to the kitchen.

Still trying to be as quiet as possible, he rummaged for a glass and poured himself some water. The first glass he chugged almost in its entirety in one go. He refilled it and did nearly the same with that one. Apparently, he also forgot how thirsty he could get after an attack. He was about to pour a third glass when someone began to knock on his door. Afraid the sound would wake Alex, Bucky rushed to the door. He opened it to find Steve standing on the other side.

"Can we talk?"

Bucky let out an exhale. He wasn't in the mood for this. He wanted at least the morning hours of the new day to be free from the things he dealt with the day before.

"Where were you last night?" Steve pressed. "I came by to talk, but no one answered."

Bucky motioned for Steve to keep his voice down. He saw a moment of question flicker in his best friend's eyes, so he cast a thumb in the direction of his bedroom. "Alex is still sleeping," he whispered.

Steve winced, then mouthed _sorry_. He stepped back into the hallway, giving Bucky space to join him. It became clear that Steve wanted to talk, and he wanted to talk now, so Bucky joined him in the hall. He folded his arms over his chest; a subconscious move in protection against what Steve might tell him. "What is it?"

"Why did you storm out of there yesterday without waiting for me?"

"I was pissed off, in case you hadn't noticed."

Steve angled his head and made a face. "Of course I noticed. That's why I wanted to talk to you afterwards." He tipped his chin at the apartment. "Did you tell her?"

"No." Bucky looked away, unsure if he should reveal what actually happened after he left the meeting. He wrestled with it for only a moment. Steve was still his best friend no matter what, S.H.I.E.L.D. or no S.H.I.E.L.D. "I had a panic attack last night." He looked at Steve with cautious eyes, watching as his expression became fearful.

"Are you okay?"

"I am now."

Steve's eyes went round with fear. "Jeez, Buck, I had no idea. I'm sorry. I'm sorry about this whole thing."

"It's fine. Really." Bucky already felt guilty enough, he didn't need Steve competing with him for who got to feel the guiltiest over the situation.

"Did it happen right after you left?"

"It started inside. The minute I heard they wanted to use Alexis like that..." He shook his head, still disgusted by the thought of it all. "The attack was unexpected. I was thrown by it, honestly. But Alexis was there for me. She helped me through it."

A little of Steve's nerves seemed to subside. "That's good. That's really good. I'm glad she was there."

"Don't you see, though?" Bucky balled his hand into a fist as he leveled with him. "You see why I got so pissed? Why I reacted the way I did?" He lowered his voice to barely above a whisper. "_I can't lose her_, Steve. And I _won't _lose her to anything that resembles the way I lost myself."

Steve lowered his eyes. "I doknow. You have to believe me when I say: I toldFury this would happen. I asked him not to do the exact thing he ended up doing. I was wrong to think a compromise was the way to go, and I'm sorry."

Bucky wasn't expecting an apology, but hearing it alleviated that fraction of anger that came back to life inside him. Steve stared at him, waiting for a response to his apology, but all Bucky could do was shake his head nervously. "I can't lose her, Steve."

"You're not going to."

"How can you say that when the organization we work for is preying on her?"

Steve reached out and placed a hand on Bucky's shoulder. "Because I won't let it. I defended you after you left the meeting and I wasn't shy about it. What I said must have struck a nerve because the mission's now on hold."

Bucky drew his head back in surprise. "It is?"

"We're gonna get it sorted out, but I won't participate in this mission until the experiment's off the table." Now, instead of just one hand on Bucky's shoulder, Steve clasped them both. "You're _not _going to lose her, Bucky."

His steady eyes and confident gaze spoke to Bucky, reassuring him he would stand by his word. Bucky gave him a nod. "Thanks, Steve."

"I have a private call with Fury in an hour. I wanted to make sure we talked first before I go into it." Steve inclined his head, his eyes lining up with Bucky's. "I have to ask: do you still want to be a part of this mission if they agree to take the experiments out of it?"

"Yes" Bucky answered. "I was never upset with the mission's original goal. Just the bullshit S.H.I.E.L.D. was pulling."

The corner of Steve's mouth turned upward. "Good. I didn't want to go into something like this without my wingman."

"Sorry pal, but you're _my _wingman" Bucky quipped. His attempt at holding back the humor in his face failed miserably. When he couldn't hold it anymore, he broke out into a laugh. Even Steve joined in, albeit quietly.

Steve gave Bucky one more tap on the shoulder, told him he'd check in later after his call with Fury, then headed back to his end of the apartment wing. Bucky watched after him, feeling content with the reassurance Steve had given him.

Turning back, Bucky entered his apartment with his thoughts still lingering on his and Steve's conversation. When he looked up, Alex was standing there. Her arms hugged her torso tightly, giving her posture a shrunken, hesitant look. She stared at him, eyes round with fear.

"What experiments?" she asked, her voice trembling a little.

The air was caught in Bucky's lungs when he realized she'd overheard them the entire time.

Alex took a step forward, her shapely brows drawing together. "What _experiments _was Steve talking about, James?"

"It was S.H.I.E.L.D," Bucky answered. "They wanted to try and have you do a transfer with one of those creatures...to see what would happen if you took on their power." He watched the slender curve of her neck bob a little as she swallowed.

"Is this why you had your panic attack?"

Bucky nodded. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I meant to, I just couldn't do it last night."

Alex nodded in quiet understanding. She looked defeated standing there, but Bucky owed her the rest of the story. "Our next mission is to capture one of those things and bring it back. After that, they planned to run tests on it. When they said they wanted to test _you_, I refused to agree to it and I stormed out. That's when everything went to hell."

Alex cast her eyes downward for a moment. "Who's idea was this?"

"It was all S.H.I.E.L.D."

"Fury, too?"

Bucky nodded again, watching as all the light in Alex's eyes disappeared. He approached her, careful not to touch her if she didn't want him to. To his relief, Alex relaxed willingly into his arms.

"I swore I'd protect you at all costs, and I intend to stand by that" Bucky told her, tightening his arms about her. "And I _am _sorry I couldn't tell you last night. Everything was still too raw."

She gazed up at him curiously. "What was?"

"My mind. My thoughts. All of it." The admission caused a wave of shame to roll through his body. "I just let it spiral. I kept thinking how they might treat you...how they treated _me _when I was in that position...how I would never let them come anywhere close to doing things to you that I allowed done to me. I let my thoughts and emotions get out of control."

Alex could feel Bucky's heartbeat increase against her own chest. She placed her hands on his waist, giving the block of muscle that was his midsection a squeeze. Just a tiny gesture to bring him back to the moment and out of his mind. "You don't have to explain. I understand." She leaned against his chest again, feeling his hands cradle her head protectively. "I'm sorry I had anything to do with you having that attack. I had no idea."

"Don't ever apologize." He kissed the top of her head. "Never apologize for that."

In the warmth of Bucky's embrace, Alex closed her eyes and inhaled his scent; a mix of his laundered t-shirt and something masculine that was distinctly him. It was now a familiar scent, one that had a calming effect over her.

And she needed something calming. The stuff that Bucky revealed to her - about the creature and the proposed experiment - was more than disturbing. But standing there swaddled in Bucky's chest and arms, Alex felt the protection he swore to give her. His arms were a physical barrier to anything threatening, but his words meant the most to her.

"How are you feeling?" Bucky asked gently.

Alex didn't even know. A part of her felt numb, like she had all her life. A part of her didn't even want to consider that the man who asked her to be a part of the Avengers would willingly put her life in jeopardy. But it was real. All of it. And she didn't know how to process any of it.

"I don't know yet" was her answer. "I honestly don't know how to feel."

"That's okay, too" Bucky told her. "Maybe neither of us need all the answers just yet."

Alex smiled. "Maybe you're right."

The truth was, she really didn't want to think about any of it. Her life as an Avenger was going so well up until Thimphu. In the case of her and Bucky's relationship, Thimphu had strengthened parts of her life. In many other ways, it left her with more questions than answers. The suppression collar had done more to damage her confidence than she anticipated. Then there was the unsettling realization that Hydra had the means and the desire to create something specifically designed to withstand an Avenger's influence against them. If she thought about it too long, she could feel the hope inside her begin to wither away. She supposed this was exactly what Hydra wanted, so she would fight against it as long as she could.

And that made her realize, despite the news about Hydra and the idea that S.H.I.E.L.D. considered using her as a experimental guinea pig against Hydra, there was still love to be found. And where there was love, there would always be hope. It brought an idea to Alex's tired mind, even as she stood there feeling her hope waver.

"We should get out of here tonight" she muttered against Bucky's chest.

"Yeah? Where to?"

"How about dinner in the city?"

Bucky's smirk turned mischievous. "How about dinner and _dancing _in the city?"

"Dancing, huh?" Alex tilted her head back to see a set of dimples staring back at her.

"I've missed it." He brushed his thumb across her cheek. "It's been a while since we last danced, you know."

"I do know, because I've missed it too." And while that was true, Alex couldn't help but feel as though maybe her suggestion was ill-timed. "I just really want to focus on something good right now. It's all gotten so heavy around here. But...if you're not up to it yet, that's completely fine too."

"I am completely and totally up for this" he told her, his voice steady with assurance. "In fact, I think it's _just _the kind of break we need."

Alex was happy to hear it. She rose onto her toes to kiss him. "So it's a date, then?"

"It's a date" Bucky replied. Memories of their first date together, here in his apartment, came flooding back to him. He realized that even then, he had some of the same feelings inside him for Alex that he wrote in his notebook that morning. It left him feeling confident that later, if the moment was right, he would tell Alex exactly how he felt.

* * *

Alone in his apartment, Steve readied himself in front of the camera in his small office. Determination to right the wrongs that took place the day before were heavy on his mind. He bobbed his knee as he sat waiting, anxious to get the call started. A few minutes passed silently before Nick Fury, dressed in all black yet again with his eye patch adorning his face, appeared on the screen.

"Rogers."

Steve nodded. "Fury."

"I want to reiterate that I am alone and no one is listening in on this call" Nick told him. "Just you and I today. Got it?"

"Got it. Same situation here." Steve clasped his hands in front of his lap. "So should I begin, or...?"

"Please." Fury raised an open hand. "Get everything you have on your mind out in the open."

Readjusting in the chair, Steve set his shoulders. "Let me start by saying I'm glad you've reconsidered the experiment part of this mission. I spoke with Bucky this morning; in fact, not too long ago. We're on good terms, and he expressed he's still willing to be a part of the team tasked with capturing one of the hybrids, but only _if _you take Markos out of it."

Fury gave a single, slow nod. "That's encouraging to hear."

"It is," Steve agreed. "He still has a less than stellar opinion of S.H.I.E.L.D., which is understandable - in my opinion."

"I had no clue he was in a relationship with the girl, Rogers."

"Again - I tried to tell you." He watched as Fury inhaled and crossed one leg over the other. Clearly, his opinions on the matter still weren't gaining him any ground in this, unless he counted Fury's frustration.

"Anything else you'd like to say?" Fury asked.

"Just that I stand by what I told you before: give me proof that S.H.I.E.L.D. pulled the experiment and I'll be more than willing to join Bucky and the others on this mission again" answered Steve. "That _includes _Romanoff, who I also had to smooth things over with following yesterday's meeting."

"Her too?" Fury rolled the one eye that was visible. "All this trouble...all this dissident...over one new girl."

Steve swallowed his retort. He knew he had to weigh his words a little more carefully today, even _if _it was just him and Fury on the call. Despite this, hearing Fury refer to Alexis in so many words began to boil his blood.

"You know," Fury began, "when I first saw the work Markos was doing on her own, I thought: _I have to have her join the team_. Do you know what kind of stuff she was doing when I picked up on her through the grapevine?"

Steve shook his head 'no'. On the screen, Fury stared off across the room he was in, his mind lost in the memory.

"She'd do her thing, you know - zap people, or whatever she does with her hands - sucking out of them the traits she needed to save whoever it was that needed saving." Fury shook his head in disbelief. "I still couldn't believe what I saw when I first witnessed it. It was something I just knewthis group needed."

"And she is" Steve told him, confidence backing his tone. "She's been invaluable since she joined us, and she'll only get better the more missions she's on."

"I'm not saying she hasn't been invaluable. In fact, quite the opposite." Fury bent over his knees now, eyeing the camera and Steve beyond it. "Did you know that the greater New England area's crime went down 27% in just the three months I was following her? Before I spoke with her about the Avengers? _Three months_, Rogers. And that was her working _alone_."

A hint of a smile touched Steve's mouth. "I didn't know that, but seeing her in action, I'm not that surprised."

"It was remarkable." Fury sounded every bit as impressed as he looked. "I guess I always thought Markos might be able to do more for us. I had that tiny little sliver of hope in my mind that she might actually be the answer we've been looking for to beat Hydra."

"Your mistake was thinking the answer to that was having her duplicate this hybrid creation of Hydra" Steve bit back. "And by trying to control her with a suppression collar."

Fury shrugged. "It was only a thought."

"A thought that S.H.I.E.L.D. ran with." A muscle tightened in Steve's jaw. "Where did you even _get _one of those collars, anyways?"

"There's a lot we don't disclose to you, Rogers. _Or _Stark."

The men stared at one another. Steve always knew, no matter how much they depended on him or any other one of them on the team, there would always be secrets. It's how it was with war. It's how the world was now. At least _that_hadn't changed after he came out of the ice, though he wished it would have.

"I never told Bucky about your comment about the collar" Steve mentioned. "Nor will I."

"Good."

"Is it?" Steve looked away in disgust. He'd spent hours wrestling with trying to decide if he should disclose that piece of information to Bucky. He wanted to be truthful, but he saw how affected Alex was by the one Hydra use on her in Thimphu. He'd seen how utterly vicious Bucky became when he saw Alex wearing it. Even he had been rattled by the sight of her. It wasn't humane. It wasn't right. It angered him all over again.

"I'm telling you, Fury - if you ever use that on her..."

"I won't, nor will S.H.I.E.L.D. We won't need to." Fury saw the blue of Steve's eyes liven. "Yes, that's right. I've convinced them to remove all mentioning of the experiment as part of this mission. S.H.I.E.L.D. signed the documents this morning, taking Markos out of it."

It was the first time Steve felt like he could actually relax. His posture eased a little in his chair with this new revelation. "That's great news, Fury. Thank you."

"Apparently, they want the sample much more than they want Markos involved, _especially _if it means leaving you, Romanoff, and Barnes behind on the mission" Fury replied, not looking pleased whatsoever. "So you can tell Barnes his girlfriend is safe."

"I will." As Steve said this, he wondered why his mind made him think Fury was leaving out the words _'for now' _at the end of his last sentence.

"And I don't want to hear about any of this again. Understand?"

"Affirmative."

Fury gave a nod. "I'll send you a copy of the signed documents showing that all experiments are withdrawn from the mission." He stood and went to the camera, but before he clicked off, he made one last remark. "Oh, and Rogers?"

Steve acknowledged him with a raise of his eyebrows.

"Don't tell Markos about any of this."

Fury didn't give him the chance to respond. He turned the camera off, signaling the hard end to the call. Steve remained in his chair, staring at his hands in his lap.

All he could do was hope Bucky hadn't told Alex yet.

* * *

Hours later, long after sunset but only a couple hours before midnight, Alex and Bucky sat close together in a booth in one of New York City's jazz lounges. Their dinner was amazing; both of them filling themselves on a three course meal and feeling rather indulgent, given their current mood. After dinner, the couple went in search of music. They chose a jazz lounge, complete with a rich mahogany bar full of top shelf liquors and a plenty of plush, cushioned booths. On a small stage, four artists currently played instruments while the female lead singer crooned a mix of original music and several cover songs from decades ago. Her voice had that old fashioned edge to it; both swanky and beautiful and fitting for the lazy instrumentals that guided her voice across the lounge.

In the booth, Bucky and Alex leaned close to one another over glasses of brandy. Sometimes they listened to the music in silence, other times they found themselves deep in conversation about the most random of topics. One such topic was Bucky speaking in all the languages he was fluent in, completely wooing Alexis right off her feet with how sexy he sounded.

"Okay so we've covered Russian, German, Italian, and of course Greek..." Alex winked at him when she said it. He completely floored her with how amazingly well he spoke fluent Greek. When he spoke to her, his buttery words went straight below Alex's waist and melted in the heat that bloomed there. "What one am I missing?"

"Romanian?"

"Oooo, Romanian." Alex's smile dazzled excitedly. "Yes, yes. Say something."

Bucky cocked his head coyly. "_Nici nu-__ț_ _i imaginezi cât de mult aș vrea să te sărutacum._"

Her eyes widened. "What'd you just say?"

Leaning in closer, Bucky's eyes lowered to her lips. " _You can't imagine how much I'd like to kiss you."_

"Oh I bet I _do _know" Alex uttered back.

Their lips met, and Alex felt the heat below her waist growing hotter by the second. She pulled away, missing the feel of his mouth against hers already. "You're really damn good at this sort of thing."

"Kissing? Or foreign languages?"

"Both."

Bucky smiled. "You're sweet." He took a swig of his drink, his eyes never leaving Alex. "Tell me something I would never know about you and could never guess."

Alex looked up playfully. "Hmmm..." When she thought of it, her face lit up. "I love dragons." Her response treated her to the sound of Bucky's friendly laugh and his big, broad smile.

"_Dragons?"_

"Wasn't expecting that one, were you, Sarge?"

His eyebrows rose. "Can't say that I was."

Alex leaned in closer. "Ever since I was a kid, I thought they were so cool. Just crazy awesome creatures, you know? Big, scaly, fire breathing, might be nice, might not be nice...although I would like to have a nice one."

Bucky continued to laugh. "Probably in your best interest to have a nice one."

"What about you?" Alex asked with a nudge. "What's one thing about you I could never guess and don't know yet?" She waited while he thought it over, nursing the brandy in her glass and reveling in the warmth of the liquid as it traveled down to her stomach. She was pleasantly tipsy, but that had nothing to do with why she was staring at Bucky like she was. In the low light of the lounge, the angles of his face seemed sharper and more striking, if that was even possible. His dark hair looked pitch black, making the ocean hues of his eyes stand out. And even though he shaved before their date, there was already a faint shadow of hair forming along the lines of his strong jaw. Alex didn't need the brandy to know he was sexy, and knowing he was hers left her warmer in parts of her body that brandy would never reach.

Bucky must have caught on to her, as he was now eyeing her with charming regard. "What's going on in that mind of yours?"

"Nothing! Just waiting on your answer." She gazed over the brim of her glass with a smirk. "Okay, fine, you caught me. I was admiring you. _All _of you."

"All of me, huh." He inquired her with a raised eyebrow.

"Especially that button-down you're wearing that I had no idea you even owned" she teased. Lowering her eyes pointedly to the button-down she was referring to, she took a little time to further admire the muscles of Bucky's chest and arms. The pale blue fabric was being tested over the size of both, but dammit if he didn't look like some kind of lethal assassin turned CEO.

"Well there's your answer then" Bucky joked. "I own a selection of really nice shirts for nice dinners with my nice girlfriend."

Alex made a face and blew a raspberry. "Oh come on, that's cheating. Tell me something real. Something _good_."

"Like having a thing for dragons kind-of-real?" Bucky got a slap on the shoulder for that one, to which he laughed a little louder. "Sorry, I had to."

Alex rolled her eyes playfully.

"I guess my answer - my _real _answer - is that I really, really, _really_..." Bucky paused purposely, keeping Alex on the edge of her seat. ".....like ice cream."

Alex blurted out a laugh. "Ice cream!?"

"Wasn't expecting that one, were you, doll?" Bucky teased in return. He leaned in and kissed her surprised mouth. "Chocolate ice cream, to be exact."

The band ended one song and switched to another, much slower tune. The lead singer's mellow voice floated over the guests, matching the slow and steady pace of the music. Bucky slipped out from their booth and stood before Alex with his hand open. "May I have this dance?"

"I've been waiting all night for you to ask." Alex gladly linked her hands in his, and Bucky led her out onto the small dance floor. It was just a small space in front of the stage, so they were one of maybe four other couples. To Bucky, they were the only ones in the room.

Pressed close to one another with their hands joined, it was Bucky's turn to admire Alexis. She'd opted for a cream colored sweater and some kind of legging-type of pants that looked like leather, but he couldn't be sure. What he was plenty sure of was how stunning she looked. The color of her sweater made her Mediterranean skin stand out even more. He didn't need to linger on her pants or the way they fit over the curve of her ass, or the dainty, strappy heels adorning her feet. She was the total package, and she was all his.

"I'm really glad we did this," he told her.

"I'm glad we did too."

"You know, last night..." Bucky began, suddenly feeling a bit nervous, "...after what you did to help me during my attack, I knew my feelings for you were real. Realer than anything I've felt since coming out of recovery."

Alex gazed up at him, feeling the flutter of her heart dancing in her chest. "I'm glad I was able to help you."

"It's more than that, though" Bucky said. "And it goes beyond just last night. It's been a give-and-take ever since we met. We really are the best team when we're together."

"Told you we were" Alex said with a tiny smile. "I hope you know I'll always be there for you."

"I do know. And I hope you know I'll always be there for you."

For a moment, Alex allowed herself to fall deep into Bucky's eyes as he smiled down at her. Their corners crinkled a little when he smiled, making it almost impossible for her not to smile in return. "I've never been more certain of anything, James."

Bucky slid his hand up the length of her neck until it rested just below her ear. "_Inima mea îţi aparţine._"

Alex tilted her head curiously. "What's that mean?"

"It's Romanian." He cupped her face and smiled. "For _my heart belongs to you._"

Alex felt water cloud her eyes. "James..."

"I've fallen in love with you, Alexis."

His words hit Alex directly in the heart. Decades spent living a life where no one would go near her, no one would touch her, no one would bother with her - all erased in the words of one man who she also loved. Their strange bond had grown into something so nurturing and complete, Alex forgot what her life was like before meeting him. Years of going without love or a way to express it culminated in Bucky's admission, and in it, a freedom Alex never knew before.

With her sense of touch that had been a curse her entire life, Alex traced Bucky's lips. She marveled in her ability to do it, and to do it with him. Since day one, she always knew there must have been a reason it worked with him and no one else.

She let her tears release down her cheeks as she smiled. "I've fallen in love with you too, James."

He brushed one tear away with his thumb, then kissed away the other. "I've always known" he said, his eyes cooling as he gazed at her tenderly. "But damn, is it nice to hear."

Alex let out a little chuckle, and a few more tears fell. Bucky kissed those away as well, and then their mouths met, reaffirming their love now solidified between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **In case anyone didn't catch it:**
> 
> **I chose to use Romanian in this chapter as a nod to Sebastian Stan, who I adore. :) I felt that such a key moment in Bucky and Alex's relationship needed some kind of special touch. I hope I did it justice.**


	15. Chapter 15

The next few days were quiet around Avengers headquarters. No drama. No heated teleconference calls. In fact, life went on rather normally. Some might say it was the quiet before the storm, but none had any idea of the storm that was brewing.

Alex and Bucky went on one of their morning runs as they always did. They began on the paved path that encircled Avengers headquarters, then transitioned into the wooded path that wound in and around the grounds. This is where they found themselves now; their matched strides and synchronized breathing the only sounds as they jogged. Being the end of October, they could see their breath take shape in the cold morning air. Neither truly complained, though. Both enjoyed the crispness of the air, and appreciate it as it kept them cool.

At the halfway point in their run, the pair slowed to a walk and took a water break. Neither spoke until their breathing came down, but Bucky was the first to speak when it did.

"So what do you have going on this morning?" he asked, taking a drink from his bottle.

Alex exhaled hard after swallowing her own water, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. "Stark wants to meet with me, I guess."

A flare of worry sparked in Bucky's chest. "Did he say why?" His thoughts immediately turned to the mission and the experiment issue, but he knew it was only his fear talking.

"He didn't, but then again - he never does. It's the Stark way, don'tchya know." She exchanged a knowing glance with Bucky, whose facial expression told her he clearly agreed. "How 'bout you? Do you still need to meet with Steve?"

"Yeah. He promised me the proof about..." Bucky moved his head, hoping he didn't have to say it. Thankfully, Alex caught his meaning.

"Right. The signatures."

"Mmm hmm." Bucky took another drink. "If S.H.I.E.L.D. really did sign the papers, and everything about you is no longer part of the mission..." The relief he felt was clear as he looked at her.

Alex reached out and took his flesh hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. "Thank you again." She felt Bucky squeeze back, his smile widening.

With their break finished, Bucky and Alex began their final leg back to headquarters. As they rounded the bend and made their way onto the paved path, they heard the familiar _whirp-whirp-whirp _of a helicopter in the distance. This in itself wasn't totally strange to hear such a thing around the compound, but Bucky and Alex emerged further onto the paved path, they saw the large black body of a S.H.I.E.L.D. helicopter hovering above the Avengers helipad. Beneath it was a longline attached to a massive metal square of some kind. It rested inside a mesh cargo net, so it wasn't clear what the square item exactly was.

Bucky slowed to a stop, his eyes peering up at the helicopter as it lowered towards the helipad. Alex came up beside him, her labored breathing settling into a more normal tempo. "What the hell is that?"

The helicopter released the mesh netting, which several hangar employees pulled back from the square object. The second Bucky could see what was inside the netting, he pursed his lips. "It's a containment crate for our mission" he said with distaste. "For when we capture one of the creatures."

Alex watched, brow wrinkled, as metal panels fell away from the crate to reveal a high-tech looking barred box. She couldn't tell much from where they stood at a distance, but the crate was definitely reinforced several times over with varying methods of what looked like heavy duty metal. She shifted her gaze at Bucky. "You think they made it strong enough?"

A tiny smirk appeared on Bucky's face at her sarcasm. "We can only hope."

"Guess this is proof the mission's no longer on hold."

"I'd say you're right."

The couple stood staring, preoccupied by their thoughts as the employees atop the helipad rolled the crate away. The helicopter retracted its longline, then pulled away from the hangar and left the premises. When silence hung over the compound grounds once more, Bucky nodded towards Headquarters. "Come on, we should head back. I'm sure there's an impending meeting I'll need to be a part of regarding this thing."

He took off at a jog, but Alex hesitated with her gaze still lingering on the crate. It was an ominous-looking thing. Whatever went in there was not meant to come back out. Its unusual design left her feeling uneasy.

She forced herself to look away, then sped up to join Bucky on the last leg of their run.

* * *

After the pair split up, Bucky headed to his apartment to shower while Alex went straight to Tony's office. It was only 8 in the morning, but she figured Tony would be up and willing to talk now, especially with all the hoopla occurring over the crate delivery.

Within a few seconds of knocking on his door, she was greeted by Jarvis.

"_Greetings, Alexis. May I invite you in? I'm afraid Tony is otherwise occupied at the moment." _

"Oh..." She paused. "Well, if he's busy I can always come back?"

"_Not to worry. He advised me that you may show up, as he has been expecting you. He told me to greet everyone who came to the door, including yourself." _

Alex nodded. "Alright then." She smiled, but she wondered if the odd-looking mechanical body before her could even recognize it. Knowing Stark and his savvy ways, it probably could. "Will he be long, do you know?" She was curious only because she was sweaty. She could only imagine how amazing she probably smelled in her damp workout clothes.

"_My tracking device tells me his arrival will occur in 3 minutes and 23 seconds." _

"That's a pretty convenient device" Alex noted.

"_It's quite useful, yes."_

Alex spent those 3 minutes and 23 seconds standing in Tony's office, admiring the awards and photographs of him with various dignitaries. She always wondered what it would be like to be _that _smart and that talented, but Alex was never one for the limelight. It looked way better on Tony than it ever would on her, and she was content with that.

"Markos!"

Alex wheeled around, surprised to see Tony enter from somewhere downstairs. He climbed the staircase and entered his main office, face all aglow. "Someone's awfully chipper this morning" she mused.

When Tony took one look at Alex's straggly ponytail and her sweat marked clothes, his smile faded slightly. "Am I not worthy of a shower?"

She considered him irately. "I wasn't sure how long this meeting would be, since you know...you were pretty vague. I figured I'd just kill two birds with one stone and come over when I finished my run."

"Ah yes, you and Barnes run now." Tony's smile reappeared, larger this time. "Funny you should mention him. I've been thinking a lot about your original proposition."

When Alex realized this was what he wanted to discuss, she almost laughed. "Tony, that was _months _ago."

"Yes, and some of us take a little more time than others to make decisions. Such as Yours Truly." He motioned at himself with both hands. "I've decided I'd like to try it. Unless, of course, you no longer have a reason to try it out on someone..."

The statement was left open-ended for a reason and Alex knew it. Per her own statement, it had been months since she first thought about trying her trial runs out on Tony. Given the success her and Bucky had, she really didn't need to practice on him. Bucky had layers and layers of hurt that required her full attention and focus when she was using her powers to remove them. She highly doubted Tony had anything worse. Still, it didn't diminish the fact that she needed to maintain control over herself and the use of her powers, and - if she could help someone in the meantime - how could she turn it down?

"What made you change your mind?" Alex asked, still pondering her answer.

Tony looked away. "Guess there's been enough going on lately that made me think I could use a few less demons inside me."

Their eyes met. While Tony seemed genuine, Alex was still hesitant. A corner of her mind wondered about the experiments Bucky warned her of; how much did Tony know? And was he referring to this? She couldn't guess, and she tried not to. She didn't want to think what her reaction would be if she knew he was in on it.

Tony gave Alex a side-eye. "Why do I get the sense you're not as gung-hoh about this as you were before?"

"No, it's not that. I guess I wasn't expecting this to be the subject you wanted to discuss together." Alex looked down at her sneakers as she thought it over further. "You know it takes a lot of concentration on both our parts, right?"

"No, I didn't."

"Well it does. So I need you to be committed."

Hearing this, Tony's expression rose. "So you _have _done this already?"

Alex refused to cave. What her and Bucky did was their business. "I just know how my powers work, and I know how _you _work, so I need to know you're committed. I don't always have control over what I see when I enter someone's mind, but that's what I want to work on. So if there's a darkness in your past you don't want me to see, then this won't work."

Tony was somewhat surprised by the volition in which Alex spoke. If she needed him to be vulnerable - which is exactly what she was asking - then he would do it. He wanted to have the chance to see what her powers felt like, and he wanted to see if she could help him. Whether Alex told him or not, Tony could tell she'd done work on Barnes. And now that he knew for sure they were together, all signs pointed at her having done the trials on Barnes. Hell, it probably brought them together.

"So are you committed?" Alex stared at him with unflinching dark eyes.

"I am" Tony answered. He stood before her, arms open in presentation. "Whatever's in there, I'm willing to show if it means getting rid of it. But _only to you._"

"I'm flattered."

"Don't be. There's a lot you won't like about me afterwards, depending on what you see." He lowered his arms to cross them over his chest. "Whatever happens stays between us."

"It will." Alex bit her lip to keep from smirking at the irony of it. Tony was dying to know if she and Bucky had tried this yet, but he still didn't want her telling anyone if _he _decided to try it. Regardless of this small fact, Alex was still impressed. "I gotta say - after you initial reaction, I would have never guessed you'd have a change of heart."

"Yeah, well...neither did Pepper. Seems everyone else gets a free pass when they want to make a positive change except me." Tony eyes shifted Alex's direction. She continued staring at him in that intense way of hers; her eyes honing in on him beneath dark lashes. Tony agreed Alex was a stunner. She had that part-exotic, part girl-next-door look with just a pinch of threat that she could kick your ass at any second. Truthfully speaking, he didn't blame Barnes for wanting to protect what he had with her. If he was in Barnes' position, he may have reacted just as fiercely at the meeting last week.

"Everyone should be allowed a chance to change" Alex told Tony, her gaze softening slightly. "That goes for Iron Man as well." The corner of mouth turned upward, further easing her features.

Tony took her statement to heart. "Thank you for that, Mother Theresa."

Alex rolled her eyes and turned towards the door.

"Where are you going!?" he exclaimed.

"Every time I try and have a moment with you-"

"-What!? We _were _having a moment! What's wrong with Mother Theresa? C'mon, everyone loves Mother Theresa."

Slowing, Alex turned on her heels. She looked at him expectantly, unsure of why she even bothered to wait. "Was there something else you wanted, then?"

"Well yeah - when are we...ya know...going to try it out? Together? The trial thing?"

Alex smirked. "Not right now because I smell a righteous mess."

"You'll get no argument from me."

She pretended not to hear that. "Are you free tomorrow?"

"I can be."

Alex stared at him, wanting a better answer.

Tony blinked. "I mean - I _will _be, yes." He smiled. "Barring any unforeseen events, of course."

"Send me a text before you come over so I have time to prepare."

"Is that code for 'I need to tell Barnes to get his clothes on', or is there some sort of real prep involved?" Tony watched as Alex shot him another severe glance and he held his tongue. "Right. Got it. A text it is."

"Come committed" Alex told him. "I mean it." With this, she left Tony behind in his office.

As she began to head back to her apartment, Alex rethought her original plan for her morning. Before speaking with Tony, she planned on showering then grabbing some food before heading back to Bucky's. She wanted to see for herself the mission/experiment signatures he told her about. _After_her convo with Tony however, she B-lined it towards Bucky's instead.

Hoping to catch him before he left for Steve's, Alex knocked and waited for an answer. To her luck, Bucky was still there. To her even greater luck, he answered the door fresh out of the shower in nothing but a towel.

Alex's eyes instinctively dropped to his waist. She followed a water droplet down the rippled pane of his abs with great focus. "Well hello..."

There was a naughty glimmer in Bucky's eyes. "I'm glad it's you and not Steve." He cupped the back of Alex's head and pulled her in for a kiss.

"Is he coming here?" Alex asked, entering the apartment with him.

"He said he'd bring the papers over" Bucky answered, walking down the hallway to his bathroom. "Hang on one sec."

_Gladly_ , Alex thought as he walked away. She eyed the strained fabric of the towel as it hugged the generous curve of muscle that was Bucky's backside. He returned a minute later; his wet hair pulled back and now dressed in his favorite pair of gray lounge pants. Alex made a pouty face, purposely exaggerating it as her eyes met his. "You didn't have to get rid of the towel so quickly."

"Greedy, aren't you?"

"Maybe a little" she murmured. Their lips met again, but only briefly.

"Did you talk to Stark?" Bucky asked. He gave her one more peck before heading to the kitchen.

"That's why I'm here." Alex leaned back against the edge of his couch. "You'll never believe what he wanted to talk to me about."

"What was it?" Bucky offered her a Gatorade he pulled from the fridge, but Alex passed.

"He changed his mind and wants to try a trial run together."

Bucky had been chugging some of the blue liquid from the bottle, but halted. "Really? Why the change?"

Alex shrugged. "Said something about everyone else getting a chance to change except him."

Bucky roll his eyes and laughed.

"What? You don't believe him?"

"Do you?"

"I'll tell you what I told him: everyone should be allowed a chance to change. And _that_ I do believe."

A thought passed through Bucky's mind. He wondered if Stark felt guilty at all for wanting to participate in the experiments S.H.I.E.L.D. threatened to use on Alex. A sliver of him wondered if the event in the conference room made him rethink everything, maybe even his past mistakes. He could only hope it did.

"I guess I should warn you..." Bucky told her, his voice taking a more solemn tone. "You may see me in his memories. And they won't be flattering memories."

"Then they're memories of Hydra's tool. Not _you," _she said as she walked over to him. His eyes had that far-off look to them again, but when Alex caressed his face, they became more present and alive. "There isn't anything I could see in Stark's memories that would make me love you any less."

Bucky felt a jolt of life return when he heard her words. He still couldn't believe he'd told her. He couldn't believe they said it. The words _I love you _seemed so foreign, and yet, Bucky never felt better or more sure of anything than when he was telling Alex he loved her. Whenever he heard Alex utter it back to him, however, it was still a shock. He wasn't sure he'd ever get used to hearing someone say they loved him when for so long no one did, not even himself.

His thoughts were interrupted by the softness of Alex's lips as they pulled him back to the present. She solidified her words with action every single time, and this time was no exception. Bucky only wished they had more time that morning. He'd like to spend the rest of it in bed with her, proving his love for her over and over again.

"I better get going." Alex patted him on his bare chest. "We don't need Steve walking in on us."

"No, we probably don't" he teased. "Love you."

"Love _you_."

"You'll be back tonight?"

Alex reached the door and swung around, leaning seductively against it. "Of course, Lover Boy. And those pants better be left on the floor when I do." She gave a final wave before dipping out of his apartment.

Bucky could only laugh and shake his head as the door closed behind her. He took another swig of Gatorade and went to making himself something for breakfast when he heard his phone _ding, _notifying him of a text message.

"How much you want to bet that's Steve" he mumbled out loud to no one. He reached across the kitchen counter to grab the device, chuckling when he saw that it was, indeed, Steve Rogers.

_ S: Change of plans again. Hybrid Mission team is to meet at the hangar in an hour. The crate's here. Mission might be closer than we think. I can give you the papers afterward. _

Bucky stared at the message gloomily.

_Mission might be closer than we think. _

This was the part that got him. It was a strange feeling, not wanting to go on a mission. For most of his life, his purpose was always tied to a mission. His self-worth was based on the success of those missions. And, aside from his years under Hydra's control, he accepted that purpose with pride.

Now that Bucky had something more than the next mission or the next fight occupying his life, the mission suddenly lost some of its appeal. He couldn't tell if this was personal growth, or if this was something he shouldn't be feeling. It was hard to know when his feelings were right anymore when it came to his job. As an Avenger, he knew what he was doing was for the greater good. He also understood that his involvement was part of his own personal atonement for the sins of his past.

_ There isn't anything I could see in Stark's memories that would make me love you any less _ Alex had told him, and Bucky believed her.

Feeling like his mind was getting ahead of him again, Bucky tried to focus on the present moment. He quickly tapped out a response and sent it off to Steve, telling him he'd see him at the hangar. He didn't know what to expect when he got there, but it was the first time he'd be seeing some of the S.H.I.E.L.D. representatives since the conference call. Whoever he would encounter, Bucky hoped they wouldn't give him any reason to repeat himself.

* * *

The hybrid containment crate was far more massive than any Avenger guessed, especially when viewed up close. Several S.H.I.E.L.D. scientists stood around it, appearing as though they were protecting it from the Avengers that huddled before it. The lead scientist, a wiry, aged man by the name of Dr. Ron Matheson, gave the Avengers the tour and instruction on how to use it. He stood at least a foot taller than most of those present. His salt and pepper comb over was greasy, a piece of which kept falling over his eyes as he spoke. He had a nerdy but sophisticated demeanor; closed off, but only because he knew you weren't as smart as he was. Bucky remembered him right away from the conference call. The only relief he felt was that Dr. Ron was the only one he remembered. The others seemed to fade into the background in his presence.

"I've ensured that your safety, above all else, comes first when the crate is in use. Even prior to using it, there are safeguards built into the crate itself to prevent harm to anyone using it." Ron smiled at the group. To Bucky, it appeared cool but calculated. He knew guys like Dr. Ron. He _disliked _guys like Dr. Ron.

"There is a control panel built into each side of the crate's exterior, including the top panel, given the...how shall I put it..._unusual _ circumstances upon which you'll be using it." A flash of strangely perfect white teeth, then his smile was gone. "It's imperative I have your full attention as I demonstrate how to engage the device in order to open it for the sample."

Steve gave a sidelong glance at Bucky, who gave one right back. Bucky was pleased to see they were both separately but equally judging Dr. Ron.

Multiple demonstrations were given on how to operate the crate's control panels, with each of the Avengers taking a turn activating some of the main functions. At one point, Tony made a suggestion to Dr. Ron and the other scientists on how they could improve one of the functions, but received only a cold stare in return.

"There are several methods by which you can subdue the sample once it's placed within the confines of the crate." Dr. Ron turned and motioned to one of his minions, who activated some kind of force field that glowed with a steady blue light around the crate. "Since we know the hybrids do not react well to blunt force, we developed a manner in which the hybrid's chemical makeup can be halted by an electromagnetic field, thus preventing the creature from moving. We were able to create this as a result of Mr. Stark's sample. It was important we got this part correct. As you can imagine, once you have the sample locked up, it's likely going to become very, _very _mad."

Bucky began to feel his stomach turn a little. A little too much of what Dr. Ron was explaining hit too close to home. He felt the beginnings of his chest tightening, but he remembered Alexis' voice calming him. He took a few deep breaths, calming himself while tuning out whatever the hell Ron was saying.

After the force field and various other methods of detainment were explored, the Avengers were handed a wrist device. Easily attached to any of their suits, the device would allow them to activate the crate from a certain distance away. They were taught how to use it, practiced it on the crate, and then it finally seemed their participation had come to an end.

"If any of you should have a question about the crate's functionality, please do not hesitate to seek out either myself or one of my assistants. A few of us will be remaining on the grounds for a few days before we make the return trip to Washington." Dr. Ron gave a short bow. "Thank you all for your attention."

Tony was the first to get out of there. Nat and Bruce followed, while Steve and Bucky brought up the rear. Just as they were all almost out of earshot, Dr. Ron called out to Bucky.

"James Barnes! If you have a moment?"

Bucky looked at Steve before turning around. He felt his heart rate increase again. "What is it" he asked the doctor. He made no move to approach, so it was Dr. Ron who had to take those few steps to close the gap between them.

An apprehensive smile appeared on the man's face. "I want to apologize for last week. I had no idea the group's, erm..._reaction_, would be so strong."

Doing his best not to glower, Bucky made an effort to appear appreciative. "I'm glad the discussion lead to changes."

"Indeed it did. Listen, James..." Dr. Ron placed a hand on Bucky's metal shoulder. The second he felt the plates shift beneath his touch, his hand jumped back. "I, um...I understand that the Avenger in question...Miss Markos..."

Bucky hated the sound of her name on his lips, and he was positive he wasn't keeping it a secret by the way Dr. Ron was now looking at him.

"She is close to you, yes?"

"What does that have to do with anything?" Bucky growled.

Dr. Ron recoiled slightly. "I didn't mean to pry-"

"-But you did."

"Yes, and I apologize" Ron stammered. "I only meant to inquire about your reaction. It seemed...emotionally driven."

"It was" Bucky answered coldly. He enjoyed seeing the doctor nervously fidget in front of him. At least he had a lasting impression on the scumbag.

"I am fascinated by both human and animal behavior" he quickly added. "I found your reaction compelling, especially for such a, uh...notable war veteran." His eyes flicked towards Bucky's bionic arm.

Bucky raised that bionic arm and shoved a metal finger in Dr. Ron's face. "Keep your fascination away from me and my girlfriend, do you understand? You stay away from her while you're here." It took everything in him not to grab the man by the throat.

"Yes, correct, I will Mr. Barnes." Ron wrung his hands together nervously. "Girlfriend, yes. Of course. I understand."

Bucky held the doctor's beady stare for a few seconds longer, then turned and walked away. He pushed through the doors, feeling the breath he was holding in that whole time finally release in a heavy exhale. Just as he suspected, Steve was waiting around the corner of the hall for him.

"Bucky?"

"He's the one behind the experiments" Bucky exclaimed, feeling his heart race. He pointed back towards the doors. "Ron. It was him. I know it."

"Whoa whoa, slow down." Steve's blue eyes searched those of Bucky's while he waited for him to catch his breath. "You okay?"

Bucky nodded, hands going to his waist. At least he had control of his breathing.

"What exactly did Matheson ask you?"

"He mentioned my reaction last week. Said it was 'emotionally driven' and told me he thought it was interesting." The scientific manner with which Ron had spoken took Bucky to dark places. He could feel the anger inside him welling. "That's when he wanted to know more about Alex, but I stopped him from going any further."

Steve considered this as he looked beyond where they stood in the hall. His mind retraced their steps, trying to recall if Matheson said anything of note during the tour of the crate that he could have missed. He picked up on nothing, but if Matheson wanted information on Alexis, it made sense to single Bucky out.

"You know they're not going to do anything to her, Buck. You _know _ that. They signed the papers. Fury told me himself. Tell me you trust me on that."

Bucky nodded. "I trust you." He looked at Steve with worry. "Why did he bring it up, then? Why bring her up at all, if the experiments are not an issue anymore?"

Steve didn't have an answer. The only thing he could come up with was that scientists would always have an interest in the behavior of others. That subject, of course, was sensitive to Bucky. As such, Steve let it go.

"You're not going to lose her" Steve told him. He may not have had any answers about scientists or S.H.I.E.L.D. or their motives, but he could promise Bucky that much.

"I know" Bucky answered as he turned to leave. "What I'm going to do is spend the rest of my night with her and forget any of this happened."


	16. Chapter 16

Just when Bucky thought he couldn't adore Alexis any more than he already did, she taught him what Netflix was.

She set up his living room television, which up until now hadn't even been plugged in. She programmed a few things, ran a few tests, and then boom: they were watching a movie. He heard people talking about a thing called Netflix, but he had no idea what it was. Thanks to Alex, he discovered that movies were digital and instant. It was a technological marvel to him.

They lay together in a spooning position on his couch. Bucky lay behind Alex with his head propped on a pillow so he could see, while Alex cuddled comfortably against his chest. He was actually too tall for the length of his couch, so his feet hung off the edge of the armrest. Alex made multiple playful comments about this, but she only seemed to snuggle in closer to him as the movie went on. If the couch was lacking for room, she clearly used it to her advantage (and Bucky was happier for it).

As the movie ended and Bucky clicked off the tv, he pressed a kiss to Alex's cheek. "Thank you for setting that up. I still can't believe movies are digital."

"Your arm is literally made of _vibranium_. Tony made a suit he can _fly in_. You and Steve share a _super serum_." Alex blinked. "And it's digital movies that impress you!?"

A laugh rumbled in his chest. "Did you forget I came from a time where movies just started to have sound, and movie _theaters _were a big deal?"

Alex gave him a look that suggested otherwise. "Yes, I do sometimes forget you're over a century old."

"You don't have to phrase it like that..."

"Why?" She tapped the tip of his nose. "You don't look a day over 30." Knowing she was teasing and knowing he didn't mind it, Alex inclined her head so her mouth was in line with Bucky's and gave him a kiss. "Are you still stressed from earlier?"

"Thankfully...no." Bucky relaxed his head in the crook of Alex's neck. "It's hard to be stressed when I'm with you."

The cuddly Bucky that was holding her and nuzzling her was Alex's favorite version of him. She adored the fierce warrior, the competent yet imposing teacher, the best friend who listened and did everything he could to help her - but cuddly Bucky was her favorite. It always made her chuckle a little inside knowing her big tough assassin liked to snuggle and be handsy with her when they were alone.

"Good" she said, rolling off the couch. "Speaking of which - can we listen to some of your records?"

Bucky sat up, feeling rather surprised by her request. "You really do like it, don't you?"

"It's a part of you" she said simply. "So why not?"

He would never get used to it. Never. "You're sweet, doll."

Alex batted her eyelashes at him in a somewhat over-the-top manner. "Any requests?" She went to the stack of records. She honestly had no idea who most of the artists, if not all of the artists, were that were in his stack.

"Something instrumental" Bucky suggested. He kicked back into the cushions of his couch, his hands behind his head. "So we can just relax and listen."

"Soooo, Glenn Miller?"

Bucky's grin appeared. "How'd you know?"

"Give me some credit here!" Alex teased. "I pay attention, after all." She placed the record on the spinner, set the needle (hoping it would work - she really had no idea if there was a right way or a wrong way of doing it), and then waited. A few crackles and pops later, the sound of slow-paced instruments drifted through the room.

"Well done" Bucky told her, knowing very well she guessed her way through it. "I guess you do pay attention."

"Kind of romantic, isn't it?" Alex walked over to him and took full advantage of his currently sitting position. She lazily straddled his lap and settled into it, feeling his hands find their resting place on her hips.

"Very romantic."

"So, soldier..." Alex tiptoed her fingers down his chest. "How would you like to spend the rest of the night now that I've taught you about technology?"

The zing of her sly joke made Bucky laugh. He laid his head back against the cushions, wanting to take in the entire form of Alex on top of him. "Hmmm, I don't know..." He hooked a finger in the center of Alex's v-neck shirt and pulled downward. Beneath, he saw a black bra covered in a thin layer of lace. "It only seems fair that we should get a little more comfortable, don't you think? And this..." He snaked a hand around her back and unsnapped her bra with one twist of his finger. "...this seems very uncomfortable."

"How ever could you tell?" Alex purred. She reached beneath her shirt and tossed the bra across the room. "Any other suggestions?"

Bucky couldn't help licking his lips as he saw Alex's nipples beneath the thin fabric of her shirt. They began to harden, which made him want to taste her even more. He cocked his head, letting his eyes roam down her slim body to her waist. He pulled on the band of her pants to get a tease of what lay beneath. He was treated to a partial view of a matching black thong. "Can you take orders well, darling?"

Alex leaned into him. "You know damn well I can..."

Beneath her, Bucky felt himself harden. "Take your pants off."

Alex stood up, amazed and turned on by the intensity of Bucky's stare as she shimmed out of her pants. Standing before him in just her t-shirt and panties, she did a little spin. In response, Bucky lowered his hand to his lap and rubbed his length that was very clearly growing the longer they did this.

"Your shirt next."

Alex obeyed, thoroughly enjoying the way this playing out. She lifted her shirt up and over her head, her hair falling about her shoulders. For all the times Bucky had seen her naked, there was something vulnerable about standing before him like she was, his eyes scanning her like a predator sizing up its prey. She could feel her most sensitive spot responding in earnest now.

"Come here."

She did, and Bucky grabbed her waist firmly. She felt the roughness of his beard as he slowly trailed his mouth down the pane of her stomach, pausing at the band of her panties. He nipped at the fabric, dragging it down over her hips and down the smooth skin of her thighs. When she was fully exposed to him, she felt the heat of his tongue lap at her core. Alex let a moan escape, and she felt Bucky smile against her skin.

"So sensitive..."

Alex bit her lip. "You're killing me." She closed her eyes when she felt heat from Bucky's laugh against her inner thigh.

"Just enjoy it."

"Is that an order?"

"That's an order."

_Fuck. Me. _ Alex thought in delight. Her knees began to weaken as Bucky tasted her, kissing her, cherishing her in a way that drove her crazy. She sunk her hands into his hair, losing a bit of herself in the moment. She kept her eyes shut to keep all her focus on the amazing sensations happening. When she felt Bucky's fingers part her folds, her head lolled backward. When she felt him push one finger inside her, she gasped. Her eyes snapped open in pure surprise of what she felt. When Alex looked down, Bucky's grin was wicked.

"Enjoy it" Bucky repeated, his command gentle but his voice husky with lust. He knew he didn't have to tell her; he could read it all over her face. It was the first time he'd pushed one of his metal fingers into her soft center. Judging by the way she responded, it wouldn't be the last.

Bucky pushed deeper, and Alex almost buckled against his hand. She had never felt anything like it. It was warm, incredibly hard, and far smoother than she ever realized it could be. Her body quickly adjusted as he hooked it inside her ever-so-gently, matching the movement of his finger with his tongue.

"Fuck, I can't..." Alex began to pant. "It's so...this is so..."

"What's that, doll?" Bucky looked up at her with a smirk, his tongue still working to bring Alex over the edge. He loved every second of what he was witnessing, and it was all at his doing. His dick was so hard at this point it begged to feel what his hand and mouth were experiencing, but he was enjoying himself too much to stop giving Alex exactly what she deserved.

Between the metal of his finger and the soft heat of his tongue, Alex could barely hold on any longer. Her hips rocked against his hand, wanting more width inside her but unable to even move or talk because of what she was feeling. Finally, the combination became too much for her. She erupted in a powerful orgasm, grabbing on to Bucky's head and leaning into it as she felt her body crumple against him. His strength held her, giving her those last few measured licks and thrusts to finish her out.

When Alex felt Bucky withdraw his finger, she almost whined from the sudden emptiness. She managed to open her eyes to see Bucky's mouth glistening from her body and the pleasure he gave her. He stood to his full height, the look in his eyes revealing one part pride, one part hunger.

"You're so beautiful" he murmured, placing wet kisses along her shoulder and up to her neck.

She needed a minute, and Bucky's feather light kisses were exactly the thing she wanted as her body came down after its high. Eventually their mouths met, and Alex had a newfound hunger within her. The strong body before her would not to go waste. The beautiful eyes, the high-set dimples, the mouth that was swollen from pleasuring her body...none of it would go to waste. She pushed Bucky back onto the couch, his seated position an open invitation. "Your turn, soldier. Off with them." She nodded at the clothes he still wore.

Bucky gladly removed them, giving Alex the full view of the strength and muscle that made up the complexity of his body. There was power in that body; an undercurrent of strength that always lurked beneath the surface. It wasn't just his metal arm. It was the physicality of Bucky, the fully weaponized design of his muscles and the power that lay in waiting from the meat of his legs all the way up to the finely shaped muscle of his shoulders.

Alex climbed on top of those sturdy legs, her hands gripping onto the steel that was his full length in her hand, and lowered herself onto him. Bucky's mouth opened in response, a guttural moan emanating from deep inside him. He inhaled a hiss of air against the overwhelming warmth and security of Alex's body hugging him. She moaned with him, feeling the fullness of his width buried inside her.

Bucky let Alex take the lead, but his eyes never left hers. Their connection was far more than just their bodies; it extended beyond their intimate moments and the passion they had for one another. With one hand securely gripping the flesh of her ass, Bucky reached up with the other and drew her mouth to his. His hand gripped her neck; the sight of metal against her flawless flesh turning him on. He held her face steady as her body continued to rock over his. Through ragged breaths and the matched rhythm of their bodies, their eyes met.

"I love you" Bucky exhaled.

Alex kissed him. "I love you."

She was all his. An intense possession overcame Bucky, so he kissed her again, thrusting into her deeper as she rode him. "You're mine, Alexis."

"Always" she exhaled, knowing full well Bucky would have her heart and her soul beyond this moment. She met his dark, intense gaze and found light in the beautiful eyes that stared back at her. "I love you, James" she repeated, kissing him, their breaths mingling together.

Bucky closed his eyes and let her words and her body envelop him.

* * *

It was the fourth time Alex attempted to leave the bed, and the fourth time Bucky hauled her back into it.

"I told you! I have to meet Tony at my place later this morning!"

Bucky locked his arms around Alex so she couldn't move. "Yes, _later_. Which doesn't mean _right now._"

Alex tried to squirm but it was futile. His raw strength combined with an arm that conveniently locked into place whenever he wanted was too much for her. Besides...Alex wasn't _necessarily _in a hurry. She just wanted to at least come off a _little _responsible in front of him.

"I'll make breakfast?" Bucky offered.

Alex shifted an eyebrow upward as she studied him. "Do you know how to make breakfast?"

"Yeah, sort of...eggs, toast, that kind of stuff. I may even have some bacon."

"Did you know waffles are my favorite breakfast ever?"

"I have no waffle mix, doll."

Alex clicked her teeth. "Shame. Guess I better get going." She made as if to leave, knowing very well Bucky would try to halt her again. He did, of course, and she fell back into his arms on the bed once more. "You're relentless, James Barnes."

"You love it, Alexis Markos."

Alex thought if her sister saw her right now, she would probably gag. Alex didn't care. No one was there to judge her _or _her head-over-heels way she loved the man who refused to let her leave his bed. Sure, she would probably come off as sickening to some people...but Alex waited her whole life to actually be affectionate with another person. Now that she had Bucky, and in him all the things she could never do with anyone else, she was going to be as cutesy as she wanted.

"I suppose waffles will have to wait" she teased him. This awarded her a lopsided, half-sleepy grin.

"I'll try and put it on my grocery list for the commissary."

Alex tossed a pillow at him. "Eggs and toast it is, then!"

The pair threw on some clothes - Bucky in his favorite slouchy lounge pants, Alex in one of Bucky's over sized t-shirts - and took their private party for two out to his kitchen. Alex offered to help, but Bucky wanted to make everything for her. As such, she took up one of the stools at his kitchen counter as watched as his large frame moved about the kitchen. Her eyes didn't know where to look first: the shift of his back muscles as he brought out the pans, or the flex of his biceps as he whisked the eggs, or the casual way he kept tucking a piece of his hair behind his ear as they talked. Alex loved mornings like these; they made her feel completely at ease and just plain happy. It was as if everything beyond the walls of Bucky's apartment simply didn't exist, and that went for the both of them.

"So when am I ever going to cook for you?" Alex asked, watching as Bucky began to plate the food.

"You're the one who never has any food in her place" he teased. He scooped up some of the egg from the pan and held it out for her to taste. Alex took a bite, careful of how hot it might be. Bucky waited for the verdict and silently cheered when he saw Alex's face light up. "See? Told you. Just wait 'til you try my toast."

Alex couldn't help but giggle. "You're a dork, but you're a cute dork."

With two plates of eggs, toast, and even some bonus bacon placed before them, Bucky and Alex dug in. Alex gave plenty of credit to the chef, who was flattered but knew she was mostly teasing him. The true test would come the next time he made her waffles.

"So what time exactly _is _Stark meeting you later?" Bucky shoved a massive fork full of food into his mouth, making Alex wonder how men could possibly eat as much as they did.

"He's supposed to send me a text, but I'm guessing it won't be until later. At least, I _hope _it's later."

The corner of Bucky's mouth lifted with just a hint of guilt. "I wish I could be there to help you."

"I need to figure out how to control it on my own eventually" Alex replied, feeling a little nervous at the thought. She quickly replaced her nerves with a smile. "I'll just picture your hands on my shoulders, squeezing me, keeping me focused."

Bucky's large eyes seemed rounder then, the lines around them accenting their size. "Will you call me as soon as you're finished?" He reached out and rubbed her knee. "Let me know how it goes?"

"Of course. It'll be the first thing I do."

She went back to nibbling on her food, but Bucky stared down at his plate. When he didn't return to his more lighthearted self, Alex put her fork down and turned to him. "What's wrong?"

He avoided her eyes. "I still remember what you said yesterday, about seeing me in Stark's memories. How it wasn't me doing those things..."

"And I stand by that" Alex told him. She hoped the reassurance in her voice and in every single action she had with him proved this.

A pained shadow crossed his handsome face as he looked at her. "Only you and Steve have ever tried to help me see that. But I know how the others look at me. There's always that hint of distrust whenever I raise my weapon, or use my arm as the weapon. I see it. In Stark, especially." Bucky tried to smile. "Really though, I guess I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for loving me the way you do."

Alex pushed off her stool and threw her arms around Bucky. She felt his arms tighten about her in return. "You're welcome, James." She pulled back and held his face in her hands. "You're mine. Always. And I'll _always _have your back."

Bucky smiled when he heard Alex use the words they shared last night. He said them in a moment of passion, but it was true. All of it. And Bucky would always have Alex's back as well.

That's what made them the best team ever, after all.

* * *

After a shower and an hour-long nap (which she desperately needed) back at her place, Alex paced around her living room nervously. She sent Stark a text, prompting him to give her a roundabout time frame for when he'd like to do the trail run. He wrote back saying within the half hour, which left Alexis anxious and alone with her thoughts for 30 whole minutes.

When Alex first arrived there as an Avenger, her thoughts may have undone her in that amount of time. It may have left her with a desire to text Tony back and cancel. But Alex had come a long way from those first weeks, and she'd come a long way with the process she was about to perform on Tony. She told herself she could do this, and she knew she could. It didn't matter that it wasn't with Bucky this time. She knew herself, knew her powers, and knew she'd grown with them. She could and _would _do this.

Those small, unflinching nerves didn't go away, however; not even after Tony arrived. Alex supposed a small amount of nerves were a good thing...or so she told herself.

"So..." Alex looked around her living room, wondering if she should move things out of the way should she have a sudden jerking reaction like she originally did with Bucky. She quickly decided against it. _ You need to do this on your own. Own this, Alexis. Leave no room for doubt. _ "How about the middle of the living room?" she asked him.

Tony also seemed a little nervous, but he handled it coolly. "Sure. Do we sit? Stand?"

"We sit." Alex took a cross-legged position on the floor, then invited him to join. "Kind of a kum-ba-ya moment, if you will."

Tony curled his lip at that. He mirrored Alex and sat across from her. At first, his knees weren't touching hers, but after some nudging, he scooted closer until their knees touched. "A little close, aren't we?"

"About to get a whole hell of a lot closer, Stark." Alex gave him a good-natured wink. "I'm invading your thoughts and memories. Doesn't get much closer than that."

Tony couldn't argue. After a deep inhale and an equally thorough exhale, he settled in for whatever awaited. He cracked his neck, then his knuckles. "Ready when you are, Markos."

Alex tried to center herself as she raised her hands. "Lean in to my hands and _don't move. _You shouldn't feel much, but if I'm going to try and take some of the darker stuff from you, it might get a little uncomfortable. Whatever you do, don't break the connection. I'll do it."

"Okaaayy." Tony honestly had no idea what to expect. He saw the white light that happened around Alex that first day in the Practice Room. He'd seen her use her powers to mirror others. But this...this was new to him in every sense of the word. He reminded himself he was a scientist; a man whose mind craved knowledge. This was right up his alley, no matter how weird it seemed.

Alex placed her hands on Tony's chest and gave him a nod. "Here we go." She closed her eyes and dove deep inside herself to awaken her powers. The faint white light began to shimmer around her. It moved outward from her hands to where they were placed on Tony's chest.

And so she began.

At first, Alex couldn't feel or sense anything. Her powers halted, feeling a strange sensation of hitting some kind of invisible barrier. She sunk deeper, pulling from the well where her powers lay churning, then tried again to enter Tony's psyche again. This time she made some ground, but it was slow-goings. Unlike Bucky, Tony had an incredibly powerful wall against his past within him. It took Alex some time to maneuver beyond it, sifting through recent recollections, bypassing his multitude of talents and personal traits, all in an attempt to reach the depth of his memory.

Alex encountered wall, after wall, after wall. All defense mechanisms, all blockages as thick as sludge, all created by Tony.

Finally, after several minutes of searching, Alex encountered a flicker of fear. It was dim; a tiny flame in a room of darkness. Alex focused her powers on that tiny flame, throwing all her internal energy into searching it. Finally, she found what she was looking for.

_Fear. Inadequacy. Weakness._

Alex locked on to Tony's emotions, then went deeper.

_Disregarded as a child. Abandonment. Abuse. Pain._

Alex's powers came to a stop as they hit another wall. The flickering flame died, and across from her, Tony's breathing slowed. Once more, Alex dove into his mind again, trying to find the memory she almost had within her grasp. She found a new one instead.

_Betrayal. Deception. Hypocrisy._

The emotions were strong but they were hard to grasp nonetheless. Alex struggled, but did her best to hone in on the emotions to try and find the memory they were attached to. There was yet another wall around them. Since this seemed to be a more recent memory, Alex was able to evade it. She pushed on until she found the memory. What she saw came at her with vivid accuracy:

_ Three men in a dark room. Deceit lay heavy in the air. Bucky appeared, his face bloodied and beaten. He was in pain. Emotionally and physically. Steve also appeared, his expression twisted with rage. _

Alex could feel Tony's anger pulsating like a heartbeat. It throbbed around her so heavily that it made her entire body ache as she sat there, holding on to his chest as she tried to see the memory more clearly.

_ Shouting. Fighting. Anger as hot as a knife cutting through her mind. _

She saw Bucky's solemn face. She could feel his hurt through Tony's memory as though it were her own. Her hands began to shake but she pushed on again, knowing this was the crux of the moment for her. If she didn't push on...

Suddenly, the memory changed:

_ Darkness. Anger swirling like storm clouds. A car on a back road, the nose crumpled against a tree. _

Alex's hands tremored against Tony's body.

_ A motorcycle.  
_ Alex recognized the man driving the motorcycle.

Her hands tremored harder.

_ Bucky - no, not Bucky - walked over to a man on the ground. That man was Tony's father.  
_ _He bashed his head in with his fist. _

Tony's breathing hitched. Alex swallowed the lump that was rising in her tight throat, and pushed on.

_Fear was palpitating. Cold hatred. Defeat. Betrayal. _

Alex locked on to the layers of destructive emotions within Tony. When she tried to pull them out, Tony fought back. She tried again, but something inside him stopped it. She tried a third time, but it wouldn't budge. Suddenly, Alex didn't know what to do.

_ Bucky walked over to the woman in the car. Tony's mother. He grabbed her by the throat and squeezed the life from her. _

The memory wasn't done. Alex was forced to see it. Her entire body shook, her hands threatening to pull away from Tony. She felt her resolve thinning by the second. Doing what she could, Alex clutched to the memories, pulled the layers, then tried to bring them out of Tony.

Again, he stopped her from doing it.

_ Silence in the forest. Seething hatred. Life wasted. Bucky walked up to a security camera, raised his pistol, and shot the camera. _

Alex's teeth chattered, her body began to convulse. _ Don't stop Alexis. Remember what you said. It wasn't him. That wasn't Bucky. That's not the man you love. It was never him. Tony needs you. Pull, Alexis, PULL. _

She wrapped the entirety of her power around the memory. Her body was weakening, but she directed all the force she had behind the memory and pulled the emotions to the surface. They sat heavy inside Tony but she pulled, kicking her legs toward the proverbial surface in a well of murky dark water. Just when she thought she was about to make it...just when she could feel the end was near...Alex hit another wall put up by Tony. With a last ditch effort, Alex pulled the hurt from Tony through her powers and then let go of his chest...and she broke through.

Alex flew backward until she slammed against her couch. She screamed as her powers sucked back inside her, assaulting her with a flush of her own energy. She lay there for only a moment before the wind came back to her lungs and she was able to sit up. When her eyes focused again, Alex saw an utterly horrified Tony Stark standing before her.

"How did you do that?" His voice was hoarse and laced with nothing but pure shock.

"Tony..." Alex put a hand to her forehead, feeling pain in her head as though her brain shattered into tiny pieces of glass. "Help me up..."

Tony was so shocked at what happened, he literally didn't even notice Alex was hurt until he forced himself out of his own personal bubble. "Oh _shit_" he said, rushing to her side. He assisted Alex as she rose shakily to her feet. "Hey. Hey - look at me." Alex's brown eyes slowly found his. "Are you alright?"

"I think..." Alex blinked, still dazed by everything. _I did it_, she realized with awe. _I did it. It worked._

"How did you do that?" Tony's entire demeanor was that of someone completely bewildered. His eyes grew wide with wonder.

Alex still needed him in order to balance herself, so she clutched onto his hands as she tried to find her strength. "I focused. I took at least one of your demons. I pulled it out." Even her voice sounded shaky. She put a hand on her stomach, feeling it starting to churn.

"What, uh...what did you see? Can I ask that?"

Alex wished he wouldn't. "Memories. Feelings."

"Do you remember which ones? Or do they disappear when you're done?"

"They disappear" she lied.

Tony wiped his goatee in disbelief. His gaze found its way back to her, but this time, he stared at her with respect. "Amazing."

"Do you feel better?" Alex began to feel lightheaded as her stomach gurgled.

"I don't know how it's even possible, Markos - but I do." Tony did feel a little lighter. He felt a little less burdened somehow. He couldn't put his finger on it exactly, but he felt a difference internally. It wasn't dramatic, but there was a change that hadn't been there before.

Alex felt her stomach tighten under her hand. She looked wearily at Tony as he took a step towards her.

"Thank you" he told her. His eyes shone with a new light in them as he smiled at her. "I had you all wrong, Markos."

Alex hunched over as the first spasm hit her stomach. "You're welcome" she croaked. She could taste the initial sourness as bile rose into her throat.

"Is that it? Are we finished?"

"We are."

"Good, because I can't wait to tell Pep about this!" Tony's voice was as cheerful as Alex had ever heard it. "Thank you, again. Truly."

Alex waited right up until the moment Tony door closed before she vomited all over her floor. Another spasm came, resulting in another round of retching. When there was nothing left within her, Alex collapsed to her knees and began to cry.

The things she saw in Tony's memory...the darkness there, the hatred he had...It was so different from what she saw in Bucky. Bucky's pain was torture and unspeakable deprivation at the hands of others. Tony's pain was a culmination of resentment and hate for those who wronged him.

And the things she saw Bucky do.

_ No, not Bucky.  
_ _ Hydra's brainwashed soldier.  
_ _Hydra's tool. _

The hand Bucky clasped about her neck in the throes of passion was the same hand he used to steal the life from Tony's mother.

Alex shuddered, her stomach clenched, and she choked out another upheaval of liquid. Her hands went to her face, feeling what a mess it was. Tears mixed with spit as they both ran down her face. She coughed, choking on her own sobs, and let the tears come in hard waves.

She had to go to Bucky. She had to see the man she knew and loved; not the distorted, hate-filled memory of Tony Stark.

With one hand braced on the side of the couch, Alex feebly rose to her feet. With weak hands, threw a towel down on the vomit on the floor, grabbed her keys and her phone, and headed for Bucky's apartment. Tears continued to stream down her face as she walked, using the wall for balance as her feet found their footing. When she arrived and Bucky appeared in the doorway, Alex felt her spirit give out. She clutched his shoulders desperately as she let the tears flow.

"I've got you" Bucky uttered, knowing exactly what had just taken place. He brought Alex inside, never letting go of her. He knew why she cried, and it hurt the very depth of his soul. He shut his eyes and willed the pain away from her. Silently, as he had so many times in his past, he apologized to everyone he ever hurt in his past, and that included Alexis.

Alex's breathing steadied until only her sniffles came in short and pitiful notes. She withdrew from Bucky's arms and stared at his face. She touched his skin, felt his warmth, saw the eyes she'd lost herself in time and time again...all steady, reliable traits. All traits of the man she loved and none of what she saw in Tony's memory.

That blank stare. The cold hate that emanated from his reflection on the security camera. The callous, emotionless way he snuffed out two lives - none of that was present before her.

Standing in front of Alex was a fighter. A man who didn't put walls up to his emotions, but tackled them head on despite the fear and weakness and hurt that it brought. He persevered beyond those limitations in order to better himself. The man before her was nothing like the man in Tony's memory.

Bucky stared at her, his face a mix of guilt and sorrow. "I'm sorry, Alexis."

"No." She pressed her hand to his mouth, her breathing caught as another sob tried to surface. "It wasn't you. That wasn't the same man."

"Do you believe that?" Bucky's eyes were heavy with water.

Alex nodded. "I've always believed it, and I believe it now."

If there was ever a test of their love, it was that night. But it wouldn't be the last.

Later that night, Bucky and the rest of the Avengers got the call.  
The hybrid mission was a Go.


	17. Chapter 17

The call came just after midnight.

Alex was asleep in Bucky's arm after a night of trying to sort through her emotions. He'd been there for her, as he always was, supporting her through her post-trial run illness. She told him a little of how it went, but spared the details. Bucky knew them all already anyway. They turned in early, especially since Bucky treated Alex to a shoulder and back rub that put her right to sleep.

When Bucky's cell phone rang, it cut through the silence in his bedroom to jar both of them awake in unison. Bucky let go of Alex in order to reach for his phone. When he saw the name on the front of his screen, he promptly answered.

"Hey Steve" Bucky mumbled, rubbing the tiredness from his face.

Alex sat up and pulled the blankets around her. She waited, unable to tell from Bucky's expression what Steve must have been saying.

"Got it. Yeah. Will be there soon." Bucky hung up but remained staring at his phone. It took him a second, but his eyes eventually met Alex's. "We leave in an hour."

Alex gave him a somber nod. "I figured."

With a tight smile on his face, Bucky pulled Alex in for a kiss. His expression changed from one full of apology to one taken by newfound focus. Alex gave him a nod, acknowledging his need to go. Together, they moved from the bed and found their clothes. As Bucky went to dress in his uniform, Alex dressed back into her outfit she wore over earlier, consisting of a sweater and jeans. Despite the sweater, Alex suddenly felt very cold. It was weird not getting ready with him. It was the first time she wouldn't be going with him on a mission, and it left a small chasm of emptiness inside her.

In the shadows of the dark apartment, Alex watched as Bucky transformed into the Winter Solider. He donned his black leather and Kevlar. He strapped his weapons all about his body, sheathing his knives one by one in an orderly, calm fashion. The softened lines of slumber that had once been on his face were all but gone.

As he finished readying himself, he came and stood before Alex in the living room. A bashful smile played at his lips. "Feels weird not having you join." One of his gloved hands took hers. "I'm going to miss my partner on this one."

Alex was flattered, and her smile showed it. "I'll go with you down to the hangar."

"Are you sure?"

"I have to see my soldier off, don't I?"

Bucky looked down, a soft laugh escaping him. "Yeah, I guess you do."

"I'm guessing you can't divulge anything about where you're going?" Alex knew the answer before the question ever left her mouth. Her wishful thinking made her ask anyways on a slim chance the rules may have changed.

They didn't, of course, and Bucky could only shake his head sadly. "I wish I could, doll."

She understood. "Do you know when you'll be back?" Again, Bucky's eyes filled with sorrow at the answer he couldn't give her. "I'm really striking out, aren't I?" Alex joked.

Bucky didn't respond, but reached behind him and removed something from one of his back pockets. He brought out the chain that held his dog tags, holding it before her in his metal hand. "Wear these while I'm gone." He opened her palm and placed the chain and the tags inside. "A part of me will always be with you as long as you have these."

Alex looked down at the chain in her hand and the symbol it stood for. A wave of emotion crashed into her then, and there was no way she could hold back the tears that came. She threw her arms around Bucky's neck, her fingers tight around his dog tags. "Thank you."

Bucky nuzzled his head in Alex's hair, holding on to her as tightly as he could. A large part of him wished she was coming, but he knew she would be safer at the compound. After all the distrust that occurred regarding this mission, the only way Bucky could do this mission was knowing she was safely out of it.

When their hug broke, Alex slipped the chain around her neck and tucked the dog tags inside her shirt. She gazed up at Bucky, wiping the tears that remained on her cheeks with a smile. "I love you so much."

"I love you too."

With a kiss to solidify the moment, the couple departed for the hangar. The walk was solemn and mostly silent. Alex felt the cold metal of the dog tags slowly warm against her skin, resting on her chest near her heart. Whether Bucky knew it or not, the powerful intention behind giving her his chain filled her with a sense of wholeness. He'd gifted her a symbol of trust; a physical manifestation of their bond. Miles apart or just across the bed, they'd always be together. It meant the world to her.

They reached the hangar, encountering a bustle of bodies readying the Quinjet for takeoff. Several S.H.I.E.L.D. scientists were rolling the metal containment crate up the hatch and onto the aircraft. Other employees were prepping fuel and engine intakes. For so late in the night, it appeared all hands were on deck to see the Avengers off.

Near the open hatch, Steve was chatting with one of the aircraft handlers. When he saw Bucky and Alex emerge through the commotion of bodies, he quickly ended his conversation with the handler and jogged over to the couple. "Good to see you Bucky. Alex." He gave her a nod.

Alex nudged Steve with her elbow. "See that this one comes back safe and sound, would you?"

Bucky and Steve exchanged a knowing glance, though Bucky looked away rather shyly. Steve's gaze focused solely on her, the blue of his eyes radiating the honesty within them. "I promise you that I will." He gave her a smile; one Alex knew she could trust. Steve turned to Bucky, thumbs settling on the center of his suit's belt. "See you onboard." He gave Alex one final nod and then left the couple alone.

With reluctance dragging at his feet, Bucky faced Alex. He settled his hands on either side of her face, taking one more dive into the deep brown of her eyes. "I don't know how long this is going to take, but...wait for me?"

As if he needed to ask. "You know I will be" she said with a smirk.

There in the middle of the hangar in front of everyone, Bucky and Alex's lips met in a heartfelt embrace. Alex opened her mouth to him, wanting to taste him one last time before he departed. Their mouths entwined like two puzzle pieces; a perfect fit to one another. When they parted, Alex stared up into Bucky's large eyes, so full of emotion and affection. "Come back safe, Sergeant."

A flicker of a smile touched his lips. He kissed her once more, then turned and headed for the Quinjet. Alex watched after him, her eyes following the glimmer of his arm and the distinct gate it gave him. He climbed the hatch up to the aircraft and disappeared within.

Alex hugged herself and exhaled. She watched Natasha enter next, followed by Bruce and Tony. Before Tony disappeared into the aircraft, he turned and gave Alex a tiny nod; a silent _thank you_for the help she gave him the day before. Alex returned the gesture, and then he, too, disappeared inside the aircraft.

As Alex headed out into the open space beyond the hangar's tarmac, she felt the air of the Quinjet's engines fire behind her. A wind whipped at the hem of her sweater as the aircraft pull out onto the small runway. Whether Bucky or any of the Avengers were watching her from the inside or not, Alex still gave them a small wave.

The rumble of the engines engaging drowned all other sounds out, while the harsh kick of the ignition lit up the dark night. The engines glowed bright as the Quinjet entered full power. It rolled down the runway and lifted into the sky.

_Good luck, James, _ Alex thought, her eyes following the craft as it ascended and then vanished from sight.

The wind died around her and a quiet settled over the runway. Alex headed back towards the hangar, noticing that all the bodies that had been there just a few minutes earlier were dissipating. The action of the night was done now that the Avengers had taken off.

As she crossed the inside of the hangar, Alex felt the back of her neck prickle in a sudden feeling of uneasiness. When she looked up, a thin man in a lab coat stood staring at her from across the hangar. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose with one finger slowly, his eyes narrowing on her from behind the lenses.

A feeling of disquiet fell over her. Alex hugged one arm around herself while her other hand clutched at the dog tags. Avoiding the man's gaze, she hurried the rest of the way across the hangar and back to the apartment wing.

* * *

The following morning, Alex wandered down to the Avenger's break room. She was happy to see Sam was there. He was helping himself to a plate of pastries someone had left out, which Alex promptly grabbed from as she passed. "Morning, Sam."

"Hey! Markos!" His big friendly smile appeared. "Long time no see."

Alex nibbled on the danish and leaned back against the counter. "I could say the same for you! Whatchya been up to?"

"Oh ya know...little of this, little of that" he said while stirring his coffee.

"Soooo...nothing?"

Sam laughed in full admission. "You know how it goes, waiting in between missions. Especially when you find yourself on the B-list for the _current _mission."

Alex licked off a bit of the icing from the pastry. "I know what you mean. And while I realize I haven't been on a lot of missions, it still feels weird not going along."

"You'll learn in time to cherish the few you won't be a part of" Sam told her. His eyes sparkled with a hint of that mischief Alex always saw in them. "Though I suppose you're a little bummed right now for _other _reasons."

Alex eyed him, trying her damnedest not to give away the smirk that was brewing. Naturally, Sam saw right through her and started laughing. "Oh shut up, Sam" she teased. "Don't act like it's been a secret."

"Heeeyyy now! The only people acting like it was a secret were _you two_."

Alex pointed the half-eaten danish at him. "FALSE and you know it!" Sam just continued to laugh, shaking his head even as Alex swallowed the last of the pastry and fixed herself a cup of coffee. His happy demeanor was exactly the kind of infectious attitude she wanted that morning, so for all the crap he was giving her, Alex gladly took it.

"Listen, listen - don't get me wrong," Sam said, "I think it's great that Barnes found someone, and I'm _real _glad that someone is you. He's had a stick up his ass for way too long. Have you seen how happy he's been since you two got together?"

"No, I haven't, please tell me more?" she sassed.

"See, now...that's what I'm talking about! You two are made for each other. Between the two of you, your sarcasm might very well be your next weapon."

Alex took a seat at the small table and leaned back, crossing her legs comfortably. "You're a real wiseguy this morning, so I think I'll hang around for the entertainment." She motioned to the chair across from her, which Sam then happily occupied. "Plus, we don't get to talk much outside of missions and all."

"Yeah, this is kinda nice, isn't it?"

They raised their cups of coffee to one another and clinked the rims.

"You know, I'm not sure I ever really said thank you for swooping in - literally - and finishing off those Hydra agents at the facility in Thimphu" Alex told him. "That night was a real mess and the trip back wasn't exactly the best either."

While Sam appreciated it, he waved it off all the same. "You'll come to _also _learn that we all end up taking our turns. Some missions we get our asses saved, other missions we're the ones saving everyone else's ass. The 'thank yous' become implied after a while."

"Guess I still have a little more learning to do, huh?" Alex felt a little silly, but she owned it. These guys had a lot of years working together and doing this sort of thing. She had just a couple months under her belt. With any luck, she'd still be here years from now, sitting at this very table drinking coffee with Sam Wilson.

"Nah, don't worry - you'll get there." Sam's tone was genuine. "Especially with all the work you've been putting in."

Alex was surprised to hear this. "What work are you referring to, exactly?"

"Let's see: there's the morning runs, the shooting practice, the martial arts practice..." He listed them off on his fingers. "Am I missing anything?"

"Nope, think you got 'em all" she said with a grin.

"Was it Barnes' idea or yours?"

"All mine, actually. After that incident in the Thimphu facility..." She gave Sam a look that spoke of her distaste for talking about it. "Let's just say it's been a learning experience being here, in more ways than one."

Sam stared down at his coffee, lost in the memory of their Thimphu mission. It hadn't been an easy night for Alexis, so he completely understood why she likely had Barnes helping her. He was certain she would go far, though. Even without the extra credit she was receiving from Barnes.

"Not to get all serious on you" Sam began, treading lightly. "I never saw Barnes as protective as he was on that mission. That's how I know you two are the real deal. I can joke around all I want but the fact remains: the man has changed since you got here, and it's been a good change."

Alex made an _aww _face, her expression full of the appreciation she felt in that moment. "That's really kind of you, Sam. Thank you."

"I mean it" he reiterated, totally serious. "If you take the man that came here after Wakanda and compare it to the man who left for the mission yesterday?" He shrugged. "Like night and day, I'm telling ya."

Sam's words really had an impact. Alex felt a sense of accomplishment warm her from the inside out in a good old-fashioned, feel-good moment. She wasn't sure Bucky's changes could be attributed to their trial runs, or if it was the love that had developed between them. She figured it was both. Whatever the reason, Alex was incredibly grateful for having been a part of it.

Across the table, Sam studied her curiously. "Uh oh. What did I say?"

Alex smiled. "No, no, it was nothing you said. It just got me thinking about him and the current mission..."

"He'll hold his own" Sam told her confidently. "If I know Barnes, he'll go in there with Steve and Nat and the others and absolutely whoop some serious saggy-neck-hybrid-creature ass."

This brought a big smile to Alex's face. "I think you may be right."

A comfortable silence settled between them.

Alex lifted her coffee mug to her lips. "Those things really were wretched, weren't they?"

"Fucking disgusting" Sam replied.

They each sipped their coffee, their brows furrowed at the thought of the creatures. After thoughts of the hideous creatures they fought in Thimphu, they gladly changed the topic to more light-hearted discussions. Both thought it was nice to just sit and chat. With no real obligations rushing them, they talked for nearly 45 minutes while enjoying more pastries and coffee. Because of this, Alex never felt more in need of a morning run than she did then.

"Well, I suppose it's about that time..." She reluctantly stood. "I don't want to neglect my morning runs just because my running partner isn't here."

Sam stood to see her off. "Don't wanna let Barnes down, huh?"

"Maybe a little of that too" she conceded with a smile. "Thanks for the company this morning."

Alex left the break room feeling refreshed and energized. With a bounce in her step, she went back to her place and changed into some workout clothes. She threw her hair up in a ponytail, stepped into her sneakers, and wound her way down through the halls of headquarters. When she stepped out into the cold November air, the chill of it felt refreshing on her skin. She quickly found her jogging pace and began the five mile circle her and Bucky usually ran.

A few minutes in, Alex could already see her breath forming a cloud of fog as she ran. She looked beside her, wishing Bucky was there with her. Besides missing his presence altogether, she missed the little things she didn't take the time to really appreciate. Like the bouncy way his hair moved with every stride, or the reassurance of his smile when he saw her lagging a little. It almost always made Alex pick up her speed, which she tried to do now when she thought of Bucky doing it.

She steadily wound her way through the woods on the wooded path, then took exactly one break in the spot they always did. When she caught her breath, Alex headed back to headquarters. There was a small hill right before the view of Avengers Headquarters came into sight, and the slight incline was always killer at the end of the run. Alex pushed through the cold air stinging her lungs from her deepened breathing and made it to the end of the run. She checked her watch: all in all, not bad. She maintained her time, even without Bucky there. A smile crossed her sweaty face, hoping he'd be proud of her whenever he returned.

After a few minutes rest and a refresh of water, Alex walked back to the building. She decided to take the western-most entrance since it was closest (okay, so she cheated a little at the end, no biggie), but that proved to be a massive mistake in the end.

Just as Alex was approaching the double doors, she thought she heard someone calling her name. The same hairs that stood up on her neck last night in the hangar were doing exactly the same thing now. Because of this, Alex turned to see who it was that could be calling her. Who she saw was the same man she saw last night, wearing the same lab coat and glasses.

"Miss Alexis Markos?" the man said, slightly out of breath as he caught up to her.

"Who's asking?"

"Dr. Ronald Matheson, S.H.I.E.L.D. Science and Behavioral Intelligence Division."

"Is there something you needed, Dr. Matheson?" Alex asked, sounding more guarded than she intended to. "I've got a lot-"

"-Yes, this will only take a moment of your time." His gangly stature towered over her as he neared. "I've heard very many things about the powers you possess."

"From who?"

"Oh, from everyone." He said it as if Alex should have known. "You're quite the topic of conversation these days in Washington."

Alex felt her blood slow. She crossed her arms over her chest, trying to keep a safe distance from the man. Everything about him gave her a weird feeling.

"I'm fascinated that you can...you can _touch _people...and pull from them whatever you want" he told her, his eyes glazing over. "That's far more impressive than most here."

She had no idea what to say to that. "Yes, well...Nick Fury must have agreed with you, because-"

"-There's been a lot of talk with Mr. Fury, yes. All about you. And your powers." Ron's eyes lowered to her midsection, trying to get a look at her hands. "I would love to study you."

A warning sign flared red hot inside Alex's mind. Was this man the brains behind the experimental part of the mission Bucky was on?

"May I see them?" he asked her.

"See what?" Alex took a step back, feeling her heart accelerate.

"Your hands."

"No, you may not. Ever." She took another step backward. "Now if you'll excuse me, Doct-" She stopped when he began to laugh, turning his back to her as he did so. His laugh sounded both desperate and tired, and he rubbed his face with one of his bony hands.

"Wouldn't you know - Mr. Barnes told me the very same thing?"

Alex heard him mention Bucky and her blood froze. She felt her powers thrumming somewhere deep inside her as her anxiety peaked.

"Yes, your boyfriend. He's a protective one, isn't he?" Ron turned and stared at her. "I wonder why, though. Is his emotional response because he cares deeply for you? Or perhaps he knows something about your powers he's not willing to share?"

"Get the hell away from me" Alex hissed.

"You're _both _emotional, I see" Ron said, even as Alex turned and fumbled for her ID to open the doors. "Perhaps that is why you have chosen each other as mates. Please - won't you reconsider my offer?"

Alex swiped her card and the doors opened. "Fuck you _and _your offer." She entered and pulled the doors closed behind her. She was never happier than when she heard the locking system re-engage. She waited, watching until the man in the lab coat walked away before she turned her back to him. She trusted Stark's security system, but she was jumpy nonetheless. She waited, but Matheson never turned back. In fact, he never took another glance over his shoulders. He just walked away, head held high, his hands fidgeting in front of him.

When he was finally out of sight, Alex let out a relieved sigh. Her hands were tingling, though she wasn't sure if it was from her nerves or her powers. Without another thought about it, she raced back to her apartment and gladly stayed there the rest of the day.

* * *

Later that evening, Alex sat on the edge of her bed and faced her window. It was only about 7 o'clock, but the night was heavy with darkness already. She sat with a blank stare, replaying the moments earlier in the day when she ran into Dr. Matheson.

Since that meeting, her powers never stopped humming. It was constant; like blood pumping in her ears without end. She listened to that humming all day. And now, as she stared blankly out her window, she listened to it again.

Matheson had approached Bucky about her. She knew that much.  
He was watching her as the team took off the night before.  
Today, he followed her until he had her cornered to talk to her.  
What would he do next? And why hadn't Bucky told her about him?

Alex's skin felt prickly, alerting her that something wasn't right. Since she had no reason not to believe Bucky didn't have her best interest in mind, that only left her gut feeling about the situation - and her gut was screaming at her to find out more. Her powers didn't slow after her encounter with Dr. Matheson...also another sign. Everything told her she needed to find him and, in her own way, find out what the hell was going on.

Sure, Alex knew she could probably talk to Fury. In fact, she should. Protocol said so. But she also knew he'd been a part of the talk regarding experiments planned for her and those creatures. Somebody was hiding something, but Alex wasn't sure who. A part of her still trusted Fury. He had a job to do, but he was kind to her. He took her in and gave her purpose. He saw something worth saving inside her. That meant something to her.

Alex lowered her face into her hand and exhaled. If she did what she wanted to do, she wasn't sure what would be waiting on the other side of her decision. But that's how all her decisions had been up to this point. Even though the idea came to her hours ago, she'd been sitting on her bed in her dark bedroom, staring out at the dark night beyond, worrying over what she should do.

Fiddling absentmindedly with the chain around her neck, Alex lifted out the two dog tags from beneath her shirt. She rolled them in her fingers, reading the information punched into the metal. A smile crossed her lips.

_What should I do?_

She stared at Bucky's name on the tags, wondering where he was at that moment and what he was doing.

_ What if I do this, and what I find out helps this mission in some way? _

As she asked herself this question mentally, she felt her powers flicker. A tiny white light caressed the dog tags in her hand, covering them as they had covered Bucky so many times before. The thrumming became louder; no longer a hum but a churning inside she couldn't ignore.

She knew what she had to do. She'd seen enough signs.

Placing the chain back inside her shirt, Alex left her bed and headed for the hangar.

* * *

The hangar was mostly empty when Alex entered. She entered through the covered walkway that connected the main headquarters building with that of the hangar, bypassing the actual docking area where the aircraft and equipment were stored. The size of the structure itself was massive, of course, and the offices Alex was interested in were on the opposite side of where she currently walked.

There further inward she walked, the more people she saw working. It made it seem busier than it probably should have been, considering a mission was underway. Alex tried to make herself as uninteresting as possible as she made her way through the levels to where S.H.I.E.L.D. guests from D.C. were housed. She checked the digital manifest before she left to be sure this is where Dr. Ron and his people were staying, confirming his location before she ventured out on this idea of hers.

Alex came to a security checkpoint, scanned her ID card and followed up by pressing her thumbprint into the small panel by the door. It granted her access to the visiting staff housing beyond. According to the manifest, Matheson's temporary office was on the second floor, room 8G. Alex felt her hands begin to tingle as she headed up the stairwell that would take her to the second floor. When she came to the room labeled 8G, a moment of hesitation caused her to pause. There was no going back after this.

With conviction, Alex knocked on the door.

Matheson answered, a look of utter shock transforming his face. "Miss Markos?"

She put on the fakest smile she could, ignoring the way her skin crawled in his presence. "Yes, hello Dr. Matheson. I know you're probably very surprised to see me, and for good reason." She swallowed, forcing her voice to tell the lie that was crucial to her success. "I felt so terrible about the way I acted earlier, I just had to come and apologize."

His entire facial expression changed. His eyebrows rose above his glasses, his beady eyes momentarily growing in size. "Is that so? Fascinating. Yes, quite fascinating." He began to ring his hands together.

"Because of this, I've decided to reconsider your offer" Alex added, feeling slightly nauseous as the lie left her lips.

"Oh, please - won't you come in?"

Matheson opened the door, giving Alex the passage she hoped for. From here, everything else should be simple.

"I'm so very glad you came to your senses" he added, shutting the door behind her.

Alex kept her hands clasped behind her back, studying the office with feigned curiosity. It was bleak, as she expected a temporary office to be. There was a desk with a laptop. A small stack of folders with a clipboard resting on top. _Good, _she thought. _Nothing too breakable._

Matheson moved towards Alex, his stature slightly hunched due to their height difference. He smiled at her, showing strangely white teeth. "I accept your apology, and I look forward to working with you." He paused, his smile fading slightly. "You _do _want to work together, don't you?"

"That's why I'm here" she said, watching his smile reappear. "As long as you don't hold this morning against me?"

He took the bait and laughed. It was strained; tense even. "Oh of course. It's all part of your highly emotional nature."

Alex almost sneered at his backhanded comment, but she kept a straight face. Matheson was watching her closely. His eyes lowered - as she knew they would - to her hands clasped behind her.

"May I see them?" he asked, hope in his voice.

It was the first time Alex genuinely grinned. "Yes, you may." She held her hands out in front of her.

When Matheson dipped his head to examine them, Alex palmed his face and drove him back against the wall. He tried to squirm, but Alex pushed the barrel of a pistol against his temple. "Don't even try it." She felt him flinch beneath her hand, but he didn't make another move. Alex then closed her eyes, focused her powers, and then entered Matheson's mind.

_ What is happening?  
_ _ What is she doing!?  
_ _ What is that sensation...  
_ _No._  
_ No please.  
_ _GET OUT OF MY HEAD!_

Alex pushed beyond his current thoughts, past recent memories and beyond the skills he possessed. Finally, Alex landed on what she hoped she would find: his memory of the conference call, the night Bucky had his panic attack. The emotions were fresh and easy to explore:

_Excitement. Thrill. Anxiety. Interest._

She locked on to these and read through the memory attached to them:

_Avengers. Several, but not all. Folders distributed._

Alex saw Bucky pull a sheet out of his folder. Something was said, then he slammed his metal fist onto the table. Matheson jumped in his chair.

_Boiling anger. Control. Self discipline. _

Bucky stood. Steve stood. Alex saw Matheson smirking, but only barely. She could feel his delight in what was taking place. A few seats over, Fury was yelling at Bucky. Alex pushed further, examining everything. Matheson looked down at his clipboard, his hands fidgeting.

_Disappointment. Annoyance. Anger. Disgust._

Alex now felt the vitriol Matheson had for Bucky in those moments. She could feel the doctor's rage for him, threatening to spill over and give him away to the others still present.

With this knowledge, Alex knew she had to go back further. She summoned more energy in her powers and went beyond the conference room. She went back until she saw Matheson's office in D.C.

_ Blinds were drawn. A cell phone pressed to his ear. His voice was low, but he had angst in his eyes. His free hand fidgeted as he spoke to whoever was on the line. _

_ "I'm not sure we can secure the woman alone...Not on our own. We need them. All of them. It has to look as though it was part of the mission." _

Alex's hands began to tremble, but she increased her hold on Matheson's face while never lowering the gun in her other hand.

_ "Yes, I understand. I do. Yes. Of course. I know - Thimphu was a failure. Yes. We will not fail this time. I have given Fury an extra collar, just in case. I told him it was the only way. It took some convincing, but he eventually accepted it. We will isolate her, yes." _

Alex felt her teeth begin to chatter, but her will was strong...so she pushed on.

_ "Yes, sir. Yes. I will ensure S.H.I.E.L.D. complies. Yes. But you agree with me, don't you? You agree we should at least give them the location of one of our two development centers? Oh yes. Of course, sir. Without a doubt. Yes, I will be careful. Those who work in Development Center 2 will be notified. They know what to do when the assigned group gets there. Everyone knows their place, sir. Yes. Yes of course. Always, sir. _

_Yes, until tomorrow, sir. We will speak then._

_Hail Hydra."_

Alex snapped her hand back from Matheson, her eyes wide with terror. Her heart was pounding so hard she felt it reverberate against her ribs and through her chest. "You're a part of them" she uttered in awe. She backed away slowly. "You work for _them_, not _S.H.I.E.L.D._" Panic rose inside her as her brain traced the steps: Thimphu. The facility. The creatures. The collar. The meetings with Fury. Matheson being here. The _mission. _

_"_ They're in danger, aren't they?!" Alex asked.

Across from her, Matheson slumped to the floor. His entire body seemed to be convulsing after Alex broke the connection with him. He tried to straighten his glasses, but his hands were trembling so hard that he dropped them.

"This mission was a fake, wasn't it?" Alex demanded.

Matheson looked far more afraid of her than she was of him in that moment. His eyes drunkenly lowered to the gun in Alex's hand as she neared. "Please, Miss Markos-"

"-Don't fucking _Miss Markos _me!" She cocked the gun and pointed it at him. "Are the Avengers on the mission right in danger? _Answer the question!_"

Matheson held his hands up shakily. "Shoot me if you want...whatever you do...please...just please don't put your hands on me..."

They were words Alex had heard her whole life. Her friends. Her own sister. Her parents. Family. Ex-boyfriends. Bullies in school. Friend or foe - it didn't matter. It never did. The things she could do frightened the average person into a cold dread that made them never want to be around her ever again. The cruel irony in it was, up until she became an Avenger, it hurt more than anything in this world to hear those words. But as that familiar phrase left Matheson's mouth, Alex actually loved the sound of it.

Crouching down so they were eye-level, Alex lowered her gun and raised her hand instead. Matheson flinched as though she held a hot iron to his cheek. "Tell me, Doctor: are the Avengers on the mission in danger?"

The whites of Matheson's eyes shown as he looked at her hands. "Yes."

Fear crept over Alex, covering her entire body in an icy chill. " _Why_" she demanded. When Matheson didn't answer, she held her hand closer to his face. "TELL ME WHY."

"The...the staff there...they know they're coming" Matheson squeaked out. His shaking lessened, but only because he was bracing himself hard against the wall to avoid Alex's touch. "...they were instructed to ambush them."

_Ambush. _

Alex's stomach felt full of lead. She stood up, feeling her joints creak from the fear that had settled into her bones. Her brain was moving slower from the dread that seized her. Bucky was in trouble. They all were. They had no idea, and they were walking blindly into a trap.

She had to tell Fury.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Just a few more chapters to go, everyone! Thank you all for sticking with me and this story for this long. Your kudos, comments, and visits mean the world to me.**


	18. Chapter 18

Alex sprinted through the hallways of the hangar, back through the pedestrian bridge, then onward through the expanse of the main Headquarters building. She brought her cell phone out and dialed Sam's cell as she ran. The second she heard his voice, she slowed to a brisk walk.

"Sam, the team's in trouble" she panted.

"What!?"

"Can you meet me in the conference room?"

"Yeah, wait - what's going on? Where are you?"

Alex didn't have time to explain. "I just need you to meet me in the conference room. Bucky and the others are in trouble. Hydra's behind the mission - it's a trap. I'll tell you more when I see you. Just come to the conference room."

She hung up and resumed her sprint and didn't stop until she reached the conference room. She rushed over to the media center inside and dialed the last number the room had called. The teleconference monitor glowed to life, the number to Fury's office flickering across the smaller panel below as it dialed.

Alex caught her breath as she waited for some sign that Fury was around. The sound of the conference room doors opening drew her attention away to see Sam had arrived. "Thank God, Sam. I'm trying to dial Fury."

"What happened?" His dark eyes searched hers. "How do you know they're in trouble?"

"This better be good, Markos" came Fury's voice.

Alex looked back to see him sitting in front of the camera on his side, one leg casually shifting over the other. "The current mission was a set-up" she blurted. "The doctor - Matheson - he's working undercover for Hydra. He set this whole thing up."

Sam's head drew back in shock. Fury uncrossed his leg and sat forward, his face now drawn in alarm. "How do you know this?"

"I entered Matheson's mind. I went through his memories until I found out why he was bothering both me and Bucky the past two days. Then I went back even further." Alex turned to Sam. "I just had this horrible feeling, and my powers wouldn't stop humming-"

"-Slow down, slow down" Fury said, holding a hand out to her as if he was in the same room. "What all did you see? Tell me everything."

So Alexis did. She explained what she knew about Matheson approaching Bucky, then her own encounter with the doctor that morning. From there, she described everything she read in his memories with as much detail as she could.

"I also left him duck taped and bound in a closet that's been reinforced with zip ties" she said, finishing her brief tale.

Sam's eyebrows rose. "Creative."

Alex nodded. "Thanks."

"Markos, listen to me" Fury said, his tone marked by distress. "You and Wilson head to the hangar. Make sure Matheson is handed over to someone from Stark's security, _not _S.H.I.E.L.D's. Don't trust anyone there that delivered that containment crate."

"Understood."

"Wait for me there. I'll alert the Avengers on the mission and get them home, then I'll leave for New York."

Alex felt the icy cold grip of dread return. "How will I know they're okay? Is there any way you can keep me up to date on what you find out?"

Fury hesitated. Protocol dictated he should withhold whatever he knew on his end, but he could see the frightened look in Markos' dark eyes, even through the screen. After everything that happened, especially now with the knowledge she uncovered, he owed it to her. "Absolutely. I have your cell; I'll contact you when I learn something."

Her shoulders lowered in relief. "Thank you, Fury."

"Markos..." Fury looked into the camera, his expression full of gratitude. "_Good work._"

Alex gave him a short nod and a smile, then the camera went black.

* * *

Back at the hangar, Alex drug Matheson out of the storage closet she left him in. She couldn't help but admire her efficient handiwork from earlier: the zip ties and duct tape came from the desk, which were used to quickly bound him. The closet, though not ideal, was the only place she could put him in the interim, so once she shoved him in there. For one final measure, she zip-tied the door shut. Unless he had a super power of his own, he wasn't getting out.

With great pleasure, Alex tossed Matheson on the floor in front of Sam. "He's all yours."

The doctor was sweating profusely. He still tremored in Alex's presence, but cowered when Sam forcefully hauled him to his feet. "How about we take a little walk, shall we?" Sam taunted. Matheson whined beneath the duct tape, even as Sam pushed him forward and out of the office. "I'll meet you down in the hangar once I hand him over" he called back to Alex.

Alex gave a happy little wave to Matheson, though the glare she wore could have cut glass.

Heading back through the maze of hallways, Alex took the elevator down to the main hangar where the Avengers, and/or Fury, would eventually arrive. Without a call back from Fury yet, she had no idea what she was waiting for. It made her anxious; waiting for some sign to come from either source.

When she got to the hangar, it didn't appear that anyone working there knew what was going on. Alex considered this a good thing. If Hydra had any notion they were on to them, she expected far more bodies would be scattering. None of the staff members that Alex saw even looked phased. They carried on as they normally would. One cargo hauler even gave her a friendly nod as he passed her.

Alex took up a spot on a hard-sided cargo box, facing the giant hangar doors that were still closed. She checked her phone, but still no missed messages. So she began her wait.

Fifteen minutes passed before Alex spotted Sam. His buff figure crossed the distance of the hangar's floor toward where she sat, his expression looking quite pleased. "How'd that go?" she asked when he was within ear's reach.

"Slimy son of a bitch is now in electro-binders." He took a seat next to her on the crate. "No way he's getting out of here now, especially with Stark's men watching him."

"Then that's the best place for him."

"I can think of a few better places, actually."

Alex caught his meaning and smirked. "So can I. Believe me. But _for now_\- we need him out of our hair for whatever happens next." In saying this, it reminded her to check her phone again. She knew the old saying: _a watched clock never ticks_, but dammit if she didn't wish it would tick just a tad bit faster.

Beside her, Sam watched Alex with sympathy. He could tell she was anxious, but he could also tell how well she was holding herself together given the circumstances of the evening. For having just entered the twisted mind of a Hydra agent, Alex seemed fairly unbothered. It was the lack of information regarding Bucky and the others that left her nerves a little fried. If it wasn't for her cursed touch, Sam would have reached out and given her a hug. Instead, he grabbed her attention with his reassuring smile. "He'll be alright, Markos."

Alex looked down at her phone glumly. "Is it that obvious?"

"As obvious as it was when Barnes was in your position."

Curiosity caused Alex to lift her gaze. "What do you mean?"

"On the Comoros Mission, when he carried you back to the Quinjet? You were pretty dazed after whatever you did to that one agent, but the look on his face was almost the same as yours right now."

_The agent I unleashed on, _ she thought_. The one that Bucky pulled me from. _It felt like that mission was an entire year ago. Alex didn't remember much from that ride back to New York, but she remembered sensations. Pain. Stiffness. The headache. The blurry vision. But if she closed her eyes, she could remember Bucky there at her side the whole time.

"So you saw what happened?" Alex asked, afraid of the answer. "I thought maybe we were the only ones."

"Oh yeah. I just never said anything." Sam smiled coolly. "Figured you didn't need my mouth running around Headquarters."

She chuckled. "You're a fine man, Sam Wilson. Thank you."

"The fact of the matter is," he continued, wanting to make sure she caught his point, "Barnes had...I don't know...this nervous look to him. I never saw it before. Mind you, this wasn't his usual stone cold stare that could mean anything from _I might kill you _to_Did I forget to turn the stove off _\- but an actual, _genuine _look of fear." This made the corner of Alex's mouth lift. When Sam saw it, he felt good he was able to take her mind off things. "I think Bucky cared for you even then. In fact, I'm positive he did."

They shared a smile, and then an easy silence settled over them. Sam's words lingered in Alex's mind. She found at least some consolation in them, and it alleviated a little of the nervousness she had. She managed to control the worst of her nerves until Fury's call finally came...almost an hour later.

"Fury?" Alex stood up from the crate. Next to her, Sam also stood.

"I have some good news and some bad news" Fury said. "Your pick."

Alex's stomach sank. "Bad news first."

There was a pause. "My call to the Avengers came too late. They were already on their way to infiltrating the facility when I got a hold of Stark."

_Too late. _ The words threatened to turn her world upside down, but she wouldn't allow it until she heard the rest. "And the good news?"

"The good news is: they're all safe. They're on their way back to New York. From the sounds of things, they may even get there before me."

Alex closed her eyes, sending a silent 'thank you' to whoever in the universe was listening. When she opened her eyes, Sam was staring at her, waiting for some kind of verdict. She gave him a thumbs-up, but then lifted her index finger for him to wait.

"Can you tell me any more?" Alex asked Fury.

"It was a very quick call, and that's all I was able to get."

Alex swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. "Thank you, Fury."

"What's the status on Matheson?"

"He's being held by security in electro-binders."

"Good. One less thing for me to worry about. Make sure he stays that way until I get there."

"Roger that. See you soon, Fury."

When Alex hung up, Sam moved in. "What'd he say?"

"They were already on the move when they got the call" Alex explained. "But everyone's safe, and they're on their way back."

Sam was visibly relieved. Alex, on the other hand, was still worried. She wouldn't stop worrying until they returned and she saw Bucky and the others were safe.

She got her wish 45 minutes later.

Almost a full day after Alex watched the Quinjet take off, she stood in the hangar once more, watching as the aircraft rolled off the runway and came to a stop inside the hangar. When they killed the power and the wind from the engines died, Alex approached. Adrenaline flooded her system as her anxiety peaked, waiting for the aircraft's hatch to slowly open. When it did, a piercing, unearthly scream came from inside. Alex looked at Sam, who had now joined her side.

"They brought one of those things back!?" he exclaimed.

Once more, the shrill scream of the creature echoed beyond the body of the aircraft, filling the space around them with the gruesome sound. Employees within the hangar turned their gazes towards the Quinjet in alarm. Alex saw them staring, their expressions laced with frightened curiosity. She stood there in her own bubble of disbelief, amazed that they were able to get Fury's call, get the hell out of there, _and _bring one of the hybrids back. _The power of the Avengers, _she thought with some pride.

As the platform reached the ground, Alex moved closer so she could see up into the hatch. What she saw caught her breath.

Bucky stood between Steve and Tony, practically hanging on to them for support. He was bruised and battered, and was bleeding from his lower abdomen. Alex could see a ghastly dark blood splotch that had stained his leather, which still oozed despite the efforts of Steve to hold a large piece of gauze over it. His bottom lip was split at one corner, and the sleeve of Kevlar that should have covered his right arm was completely torn off, with nothing left but the frayed ends.

Paralyzing fear clutched at Alex, but she forced her fear-stricken body to go to him. "James!?"

When Bucky heard her voice, his eyes drifted weakly upward. "Alexis?" He saw her, but he was too weak to hold his head up. It lolled between the supporting arms of Steve and Tony as they brought him down the length of the platform. As Alex neared, Bucky heard her ragged breaths, but it was hard to focus. He thought maybe she touched or held his face, but he was fading in and out of consciousness.

"James..." Alex cradled his face ever so gently, feeling his pain as though it were her own. She didn't know where to look first. His hair hung limp over his dirty face. A trail of dark blood trickled from the wound on his lip, but the wound on his waist caused the air to suspend in Alex's lungs.

"It looks bad, but he'll be okay" Steve told her, recognizing the horror in her eyes.

"What happened?" Her voice was shaky and weak. She glanced between Tony, who was still half dressed in his Iron Man suit, and Steve, who wore everything but his shield.

"He took a claw to the abdomen. We got out of there just in time."

_A claw. _

Grief threatened to steal the last of Alex's reserve. The sight of Bucky, the blood, the lifeless way his eyes tried to focus on her. " _I'm so sorry..._" she told him, moving a piece of his blood stained hair from his face. Bucky's eyes tried to find her again, but he winced and dropped his head.

Sam reached the group. His eyes lowered to Bucky before shifting to Steve and Tony. "What can I do to help?"

Tony's mouth was a tight line. "We gotta get him to the medic wing." He kept his voice soft with compassion, knowing the hurt that Alex felt in that moment. "Nat's hurt as well. We need to get them both there before they lose anymore blood."

Alex heard this and looked back at the ship. She saw Bruce supporting Natasha as they came down the hatch. Nat's suit was torn in several locations, but the gash on her arm had almost bled entirely through the gauze they wrapped it with. She had the same dazed look in her eyes that Bucky did. Sam hurried over, taking the other side of Nat to help support her as he and Bruce walked.

"I was too late" Alex said weakly. She found Steve's solemn gaze.

"You helped us out of there" he told her, his voice quiet but firm. "The alert came just in time. We would have been outnumbered if we hadn't turned back to the ship. Without the warning, who knows if we would have even made it back."

Tony engaged a part of his suit that lifted Bucky a little further. "We gotta go, Cap."

Steve reached out and clasped Alex's shoulder with a gloved hand. "He's going to be okay."

Alex could see the sympathy in Steve's eyes. She knew she could trust him, so she gave a tense nod.

Steve regained his hold on Bucky. "Meet us over at the medic wing when Fury gets here. We should have him taken care of by then."

Alex watched as they helped carry Bucky away, concern still heavy in her bones. His walk was plagued by a heavy limp, even as Steve's hand went back to holding the blood-soaked gauze at his waist. Seeing him like that, in that much pain, made Alex feel like an invisible hand was slowly clenching her stomach. He body felt frozen and yet, all she wanted to do was run. She wanted to go with Bucky to the medic wing to be by his side, but she was being pulled in too many directions.

And that awful, unearthly scream coming from the Quinjet.

She winced when the creature inside howled again, a shiver snaking down her spine. Who was supposed to take care of the thing, if everyone was heading to the medic wing and she was supposed to wait for Fury?

Alex turned and stared at the opened Quinjet hatch. She didn't want to go on board and see that thing, but she was the only one there with any idea as to what they were or what they were capable of doing. If nothing else, she would stand guard at the platform to prevent anyone associated with Matheson's camp who might try and release the thing. As if on cue, the monster's wail pierced the air in the hangar.

Alex looked back at the still-open hangar door.

_Come on, Fury. We need you._

* * *

Pain radiated through Bucky's body as they laid him down onto one of the medical cots. He fought against the pain, trying to keep a neutral face despite the tearing sensation coming from his waist. A doctor began to undress him, starting first at his midsection where the worst of his wounds were. Trying not to look at the damage, Bucky turned his gaze upward at the ceiling only to wince in pain from the brightness of the fluorescent lights. It made the pounding in his skull even worse. He swallowed thickly, his tongue like sandpaper as he tasted both blood and dirt.

He fought against another wave of pain, shutting his eyes altogether as the doctor removed his various layers. Steve was there somewhere. He could hear him talking to the nurses or doctors or whoever was in the room with them. Bucky kept his eyes shut, focusing on anything besides the heat coming from the wound at his side.

"Your compression layer is clotted against your wound, Mr. Barnes" said the doctor. "This may hurt."

Bucky already knew what to expect. He clenched his jaw in anticipation, feeling the doctor peel away the layer stuck to his wound. A moan surfaced in his throat, but he pushed it back down. Again, the lightheadedness came. The doctor pulled more, and Bucky almost gave in to the inviting pull of unconsciousness.

"Well done, Mr. Barnes."

Bucky exhaled, feeling a little of the dizziness recede. Next to him, he felt someone move his arm. With hazy eyes, he turned his head to see a nurse prepping his arm for an IV.

_Where is Alexis_, he wondered, feeling the pinprick of a needle being inserted. _I saw her. Is she here? _

Something warm entered his body and suddenly, his pain began to subside. His mind felt loose now, his thoughts scattering. The morphine was beginning to take hold.

_I need her_. When Bucky tried to open his eyelids, they felt like they were made of concrete. "Steve? I need..." He felt so tired all of a sudden.

There was the sound of boots shuffling nearby. "What do you need, Buck?"

Bucky breathing slowed. Every word was an effort to form. "I need Alexis..."

"She'll be here soon."

He responded by saying _good_, but he wasn't even sure he said it. Someone began to work on his abdomen, but he could hardly feel it. Without another thought, Bucky let the morphine send him into a numbed sleep.

* * *

Nick Fury and his entourage arrived shortly thereafter. Several armed agents stepped off the private jet, securing a path for Fury as he stepped down the jet bridge onto the tarmac. He was dressed in all black, wearing a woolen trench coat that fluttered about his ankles as he walked. Alex was there to meet him just inside the hangar, keeping one eye on the Quinjet and the cargo inside.

Because Fury had gloves on, they were able to shake hands when they met.

"How's the situation here?" he asked Alex, his one visible eye lifting towards the open platform.

"Stable at best" Alex replied. "Creature is still in the crate inside the Quinjet. Bucky and Natasha are in the medical wing. And I've just been here, waiting for you."

Fury smiled tightly. "Sorry to keep you waiting." He tipped his chin in the direction of the aircraft and the open platform. "So you're telling me they were able to bring one back - even with the trouble they had?"

Alex looked as surprised as he sounded. "I have no idea how, but it seems so. Everyone hurried to the medics so I never did get the full story." She thought of Steve and what he told her about Bucky. _He took a claw to the abdomen. _Whatever the rest of the story was, Alex wasn't entirely sure she wanted to hear it.

"Have you inspected the hybrid?"

"Not yet."

Fury waved for the men behind him to follow. "Let's go."

Together, Alex and Fury lead the way up the platform and into the aircraft. It was the first time Alex actually got to see the containment crate up close, but what she saw inside was even more surprising. The hybrid-creature was exactly what she remembered from Thimphu, but the crate cast a blue shadow over its red and white marbled exterior. It was suspended in mid-air, as if caught in a running pose, but its head could articulate enough for it to screech.

And it did just that as Fury took a step towards it. From such close proximity, Alex had to cover her ears as the thing screamed. Behind her, Fury's armed agents cocked their weapons in response.

Fury gave them a tired look and motioned for them to lower their guns. "Your weapons won't do anything anyways, so you might as well keep them down." He lowered into a crouched position, coming eye-level with the creature. "So this is what all the fuss has been about."

Alex's lip had subconsciously curled. "Beautiful, aren't they? Hydra really knows how to make 'em special."

"At least we know the crate works." Fury stood and looked at Alex. "Did Stark head to the medical wing?" When she nodded, he turned and stared at the motionless creature. "We gotta get this contained somewhere private before anyone else from Hydra - secret agent or not - gets their hands on it. It can't come to D.C. anymore, not with the knowledge you uncovered."

"What do you suppose we do, then?" Alex asked.

Fury looked at his men, then at the crate. "I'll have a few of them stand guard until we can get Stark up here. He's apparently been working on something behind the scenes...an injection or something...Might help us mitigate things before anyone else can access it." He motioned for a few of the men to stand guard, then started down the platform.

Alex trotted after him. "Fury, we need to talk in private for a moment, if we can."

"Make it quick, Markos - we got a lot of boxes to check around here before I can relax."

She placed a hand on his arm and turned him so he was facing her. Fury looked down at her in surprise. "How many others could be involved with this? And how many know about the second development facility?" she asked him. "Because even though the mission crew was able to bring one of these things back, there are still two full facilities making them as we speak. And now that they know that _we _know, they'll increase production. We don't have time to study them or-"

"-Markos, you have got to slow down" Fury told her gently. "I've got a team in D.C. working on this very thing."

Alex clenched her fists at her side. She didn't care about a team in D.C. working on this. Hydra bred the creatures to withstand whatever the team in D.C. probably had up their sleeve to try and kill them. They needed to act, and they needed to act now...and she couldn't think of a team other than the Avengers who could do the job as effectively or as efficiently. Whether that meant calling Thor, or...

Alex's brain slowed as a thought came to mind.

Fury must have seen a change in her, because he cocked his head. "What is it, Markos?"

Her heart began to race as she felt her powers humming to life. "Fury - has anyone contacted Thor?"

"It was the first call I made." When he said this, his expression turned to one riddled with regret. "Seems as though Thor's got issues of his own, and won't be able-"

"-Then I'll do it." Without even thinking, Alex lifted her chin and stared Fury in the eye. "I'll do the transfer you wanted me to do in the first place, and we'll get this done."

Fury paused, his mouth ajar. "How in the hell did you find out about that? You weren't supposed-"

Alex put a hand up. "None of it matters. I know, and it doesn't change anything. I'll take the risk if it means..." She thought of Bucky. She thought of the blood on his torso, the cut on his lip, the bloodied bandage on Nat's arm. "...if it means saving more people from risking their lives to stop these things."

"Absolutely not" Fury answered. "I can't allow you to do that."

"Why not?!"

"Because I spent two damn weeks arguing with everyone I know to get documents signed in order to prevent this very thing from happening!"

Alex folded her arms over her chest. "You're really going to let a stack of papers stop you?" She shook her head and laughed. "I thought more of you, Fury." She pushed past him and headed for the exit.

"Where the hell are you going?" he called after her.

"To the medic wing to see my injured boyfriend!" Alex yelled back.

Fury watched as she flung open the doors, the metal slamming against the wall from the force. He sighed heavily, turning back to the Quinjet as yet another piercing screech resounded from it.

He put his hands on his hips and thought about what Markos said. He thought about the fiery way she handled herself and the conviction with which she spoke. It was as if he was watching her all over again as he had those three months of following her, watching her take matters into her own hands and succeeding. It seemed to him that she hadn't changed one bit since the day he first saw her. He was grateful for this. All the same reasons he believed in Alexis Markos then were reasons he believed in her now.

Another screech echoed off the walls.

Knowing what had to be done but not looking forward to it whatsoever, Fury began a slow, limping jog towards the exit. _"Goddammit, how do I end up in these messes!?_" he uttered, hurrying as fast as he could to the medical wing.

* * *

Alex stood outside Bucky's medic room, staring through the glass at his sleeping form on the bed. He was shirtless now, and the scary looking wound had been stitched and covered in clean bandages. His face was cleaned up, but the cut on the corner of his lip still looked angry and swollen.

_ That was her Bucky in there._   
_ Her Sergeant James Barnes.  
And those fucking creatures hurt him. _

Alex looked on as her anger grew. A nurse worked to change one of Bucky's IV bags, then began checking his vitals. All the while, he lay there peacefully; the IV of morphine doing its job to keep him pain free and asleep. As the nurse finished, she exited into the hallway where Alex stood.

"You may visit him now," she said politely. "You won't wake him, so spend as much time as you'd like."

Alex gave a nod of appreciation. She waited until she was alone again before letting herself in, greeted by the usual sounds of a hospital room. She gazed at Bucky sadly; wishing he was awake so they could talk. She wanted to tell him she loved him. She wanted to tell him she was sorry she hadn't acted sooner. And she wanted to tell him she planned to avenge him.

Going to his side, Alex very gently curled her hand around his. "Hey, soldier." Her mouth twitched into a pained smile. "I hope whatever creature did this to you ate a fist full of metal afterwards." She half expected his dimples to appear as he responded, but his face remained still.

Inside her chest, Alex felt her powers rise. She closed her eyes and focused on drawing them forth through her hand and into Bucky's. A tendril of white light caressed his hand as her spirit mixed with his. If he wasn't listening, maybe he could feel her instead. She wanted him to know she'd come to see him; to be by his side as he had been by hers many times before. Their bond was so unique, she wondered if maybe words weren't even necessary. Just a little of her power and all of her love.

When Alex let go of that energy, she felt it recoil back inside that strange well within her, though the sensation didn't totally die. It continued thrumming as it had all day, low but ever present. She stared down at Bucky's hand in hers; so much larger than her own and riddled with bright red cuts.

_He fought it with both hands_. Alex smiled. _Of course he did._

Beyond the glass window, Fury appeared. When their eyes met, he gave her a sign that he'd be waiting down the hall.

Realizing her time was up, Alex let go of Bucky's hand. It wasn't enough time, but she was thankful for the few moments she'd gotten to spend with him.

Leaning over, Alex placed a single kiss to his forehead. "I have a plan to end this" she told him, her voice as quiet as a ghost. "They made their last mistake when they hurt you."

As carefully as she could, Alex lifted off the chain with Bucky's dog tags and placed it around his neck. If she was dead set on doing what she planned on doing, then the tags were better left with him.

She let her fingers play through the ends of Bucky's hair, admiring his rugged handsomeness. "Get some rest, Sergeant."

She had to force herself to pull away; her fingers trailing down the muscle of his arm as she left him. As quietly as she had entered, Alex exited the room.

Fury was down the hall waiting for her. He stood up from one of the waiting chairs as Alex approached. "How is he?"

Alex met him in the middle of the barren hallway. "He's good. Stable. Cleaned up now, which makes everything I saw earlier a little easier to handle." She wondered why Fury was there, especially with the changes she sensed in him. The frantic aura he had in the hangar was now totally absent, replaced by a single, lingering question in his gaze.

"You really want to do this, Markos?"

"Yes."

"You understand the inherent risks that come with what you want to do?"

She nodded. "I do."

"Then I'll support you." He stood to his full height. "Tell me what you need."

Alex heard this and felt her powers explode inside her. A bloom of energy shot out of her chest into her arms and legs, making her hands and feet tingle. Every part of her skin came alive, and the thrumming turned into the melody she'd listened to her entire life.

She looked at Fury with confidence burning in her eyes. "I'm gonna need a team, a ride, and a whole lot of ammo."


	19. Chapter 19

Alexis knocked on the door to Natasha's medic room. When three sets of eyes turned her direction, she gave a little wave from behind the glass. Steve and Tony were inside visiting Nat, who seemed to be doing a lot better than Bucky had been. She was all smiles, especially as Alex entered after seeing Steve wave her in.

"Look who it is" Nat replied, her grin present but slightly weakened from the drugs. Her eyes, however, were just as friendly as ever.

"And look whose awake" Alex said as she approached. "Glad to see you're awake and well." Like Bucky, Nat lay propped up in her medic bed with an IV inserted into her arm. Instead of her uniform, she now wore a simple white tank top while the rest of her was covered by a thin blanket. The gash on her arm was fully cleaned and wrapped, and any sign of blood was gone. The other scrapes and cuts she sustained were still glowing an angry shade of red, but overall she seemed to be in a much better state than when Alex saw her earlier. "How are you feeling?"

Nat looked down at herself and shrugged. "Could be a lot worse. That's why I'm glad you're here." She reached up and took Alex's hand in her own, even just for a second, and gave it a squeeze. "Thank you for getting us out of there before it got any worse."

Tony and Steve shared a smile as they looked at Alex. "We never properly thanked you either" Tony told her. "And while I think it goes without saying - _thank you_."

Alex certainly hadn't expected to hear any of this. Her guilt over not listening to her powers or her gut all sooner prevented her from really appreciating the thanks they were giving her. She accepted it nonetheless, but that tiny guilty tug in the bottom of her stomach made her feel terrible for doing so. "You're welcome. I only wish I had acted sooner" she told them, noticing Steve's smile turn sympathetic.

"How's Bucky?" Nat's brows knitted together. "He was in rough shape the last time I saw him."

"He's stable for now." Alex felt another tug in her stomach, but this time it hurt. "They got him stitched up, but he's knocked out on drugs."

Nat shook her head. "Those monsters..." Disgust lay heavy in her expression as she looked away. The memory seemed to drag her spirit down. "...they came on so strong this time. Far worse than Thimphu. And there were so _many _of them."

Nat's voice hitched. Steve was right there, rubbing his hand on her back in comfort. Alex felt a moment of admiration for the pair and the friendship they had. Over the months, she'd witnessed the way Steve and Nat moved together, made decisions together, fought together, and leaned on one another...and not just in battle. Alex always wondered if one of them harbored feelings for the other, but it wasn't her place to inquire. Regardless of the kind of bond they had, Alex could tell it was solid.

Nat's normally lush mouth was a tight line now, her eyes darkened by whatever had happened. "Those creatures _have_to be stopped."

"I know," Alex told her. "I'm working on it."

This grabbed Steve and Tony's attention, as she knew it would. Both their expressions were the same: they looked at her with question and a hint of doubt.

Alex turned to Steve first. "I was hoping I could speak to you and Tony alone." She looked at Nat and smiled. "Whenever we're done here first, of course."

A little of Nat's glow returned. "Well don't let me stop you from talking shop." Her eyes found Steve's, giving him a little nod of permission. "Go, if you need to."

Alex and Tony turned to leave, while Steve stayed a minute longer to exchange something private with Nat. When he finished, he met the other two in the hallway.

Steve took on his typical, authoritative stance; wide-set legs, arms crossed over the broad pane of his chest, and a stare that was both kind but concerned. "So what exactly did you mean in there when you said you were _working on it_?"

Alex tried to straighten her posture, giving off a more confident air than she actually felt. Sometimes, she wished it came as naturally to her as it came to Steve. "I meant just that: I have a plan to stop these hybrid creatures, but I can't do it totally alone." She took a pause in order to inhale. "I've made the decision to make a transfer with the creature you caught, enter both facilities that I saw in Dr. Matheson's memory, and stop these things once and for all."

"Okay...definitely was _not _expecting that..." Tony replied. His dark eyes shifted uncomfortably towards Steve, whose entire face had now twisted as thought he swallowed something horribly sour.

"Are you out of your mind?" He took a step towards her, mindful of the volume of his voice. "This is exactly what we tried to prevent—"

"—I know, _I know." _Alex's voice was full of the appreciation she felt. She only hoped Steve could hear it. "But this time, it's _my _ choice_. My _decision. Before, I didn't have one. But right now, with the way Bucky and Nat are..." She exhaled as the memory of Bucky's bloody midsection and the angry gash left there flickered in her mind. "I can't let this happen to any more people. If there's something I can do to stop it, then I have to try."

Steve looked at Tony, waiting for some backup. Unfortunately for him, Tony was being unusually quiet. He stood with a finger on his chin, deep in thought.

"I've already made up my mind and told Fury" Alex continued.

"You told _Fury!?" _Again, Steve had to correct the volume of his voice. "_Alexis_..."

"Who, mind you, has stated that he supports my decision" she finished, her eyes never leaving Steve's. "Right now, I'm asking the both of you for your help. I'll be the one that goes in, infiltrates the facility, and manhandles the creatures. If I can't kill them myself, I'll get them into positions so you both can kill them. It might be the advantage we needed before but didn't have."

"_If _the transfer is successful" Steve reminded her.

"Yes, if."

"And if it isn't?"

"I've told Fury to use the collar on me."

Both Steve and Tony's eyes met in alarm.

"No." Steve shook his head with finality. "No, I can't let you do this."

"With all due respect, Steve, it's not up to you." Alex could see the turmoil in the stormy blue of his eyes. She knew what he was thinking. He was concerned for her, but he was also concerned for Bucky. Steve was protecting his friend by trying to protect her, and Alex couldn't blame him. It's just what Steve and Bucky did when it came to their friendship.

"Steve, look..." Alex tried to collect her thoughts, but all she felt were the hum of her powers and the nervousness of the unknown ahead of her. "...None of us have been able to take these on in the conventional ways. But if this works, and I can end this?" She shrugged. "I have to at least try. I can't sit back and do nothing, knowing there might still be a chance."

Tony's eyes never left Alex. Even as her gaze turned from Steve to him, his stare remained steady and collected. He may have been silent during most of this, but his brain was working as it always was. It was always running in the background and coming up with ideas and strategies as Alex faced him.

"Tony? Will you help me?"

Tony's finger stayed positioned over his mouth as he studied her. "What's your plan?"

A glimmer of hope kindled inside Alex. "Assuming the transfer goes well, I'll be a part of their hive mentality. I'll be able to connect with them, in a sense. Read their thoughts. Mimic their behavior. It might be enough to slip past a few and find the 'mother' hybrid, assuming there is one."

"There should be one, yes - that was part of our instructions on the mission" Tony replied. "Go on."

Alex glanced at Steve, whose facial muscles seemed a little less tight now. "I'll try and take out the mother first, which _should _weaken the rest and leave them open for me to unleash on. If I'm not able to do that, then that's when you guys come in. We can come up with a signal of some kind...something to let you know on the outside that things are going well on the inside. I'll leave it up to you guys how you want to finish off the rest of the facility."

It sounded like a decent plan to Tony. And whether Alex knew it or not, it was actually quite close to their original mission plan they had not 24 hours ago. Steve was thinking this very same thing as he stewed over Alex's plan. Initially, he was against all of this for the simple fact that he still believed Alex might end up in more trouble than she realized. Then again...after what he and the others encountered, she might be their only true chance at success.

And then there was Bucky. He was asleep now, but if something happened to Alex during all of this...Steve didn't even want to think about it. He wouldn't consider it. And the only way he could ensure nothing happened to her on this mission was to go with her and help her.

"So..." Alex tried to smile at the grim looking men in front of her. "Will you help me?"

Tony gave a single, firm nod. "I'm in." He looked beside him at Steve. "Cap? Whaddya think?"

Steve remained staring at Alex. He also gave a single nod. "I'm in."

Alex let out a relieved exhale.

* * *

Fury came through with everything Alex requested. The ride she wanted was the Quinjet, which had been resupplied and refueled and was now completely ready to go.

The ammo she requested consisted of her usual assortment of hand guns and one singular rifle strapped to her back (the one, in fact, that she practiced using with Bucky many weeks ago), as well as one of the grenade launchers, and several rounds of explosives. It looked like overkill, but that's exactly what she was going for.

Her team, of course, would be Steve and Tony, with some additional S.H.I.E.L.D. gunmen appointed by Nick Fury to go along for the ride. Steve, Tony, and Alex would be handling the heavy work, but it never hurt to have a few well-trained, well-armed agents in tow.

Fury stood still as stone as Alex crossed the hangar, now dressed in her Wakandan suit of black and purple. It was the first time Fury had seen Alex in her specially made suit, and the sight of it made both his eyebrows rise. "Quite an upgrade from the last time I saw you suited up."

Alex looked down humbly. "You can give your regards to Stark. He had it specially made."

"Wakandan?"

Alex nodded.

Fury eyed the sleek black one-piece suit with high regard. "Not bad, Markos. Not bad at all." He smiled at her, and Alex returned the gesture.

"Everything ready to go?" She looked past him at the Quinjet. "Is, uh...is the subject still in its crate inside?"

"Yes. _And _all the ammo you could ever need." Though he only had one eye visible, it honed in on Alex in a rather fatherly, protective way. "You know I gotta ask one more time..."

Alex chuckled. "Yes, Fury. I'm _sure _I want to do this." He also let out a soft chuckle, and for a moment, Alex thought they could have been back in that dark alley of Boston when he first approached her about joining the team. If Alex recalled correctly, _she _had done most of the chuckling because she thought one of them had lost their mind.

Sam interrupted Alex's reverie as he came striding forward. He wiped his hands on his now-dirty khakis, doing his best to remove some of the gunpowder residue before shaking Fury's hand. "Hey Fury, good to see you."

"Same, Wilson. Everything loaded up?"

Sam looked at Alex, though his smile seemed laced with regret. "It is, but...Markos, are you sure-"

Both Alex and Fury began to smile, causing Sam to halt mid-sentence. Alex nudged him in the waist. "Fury just asked me the same thing, so you might as well hold your breath."

"Should've expected that" Sam replied, eyeing Fury with sympathy.

"There is...one thing." Alex felt her chest tighten with guilt and fear. "Can you do something for me while I'm gone, Sam?"

Sam shoved his hands in the pockets. "What's that?"

"When Bucky wakes up, make sure you explain this was my idea." The words were difficult to speak, but Alex knew Bucky would demand an explanation. "You're the only one here who can explain everything from start to finish."

Sam glanced up and away, watching both Rogers and Stark board the Quinjet. He knew Barnes would be furious the minute he realized what they were all doing, and he wasn't sure he wanted to be around when it happened. But when Sam looked back at Alex, he couldn't ignore the pleading look in her gaze. "Alright, I'll do it." He lifted a finger at her, even as her expression brightened with gratitude. "But if I get a taste of metal in return, I'm sending _you _the bill."

If the moment wasn't so serious, she might have laughed. Instead, she gave him a smirk. "We'll discuss that when I get back."

"Just make sure you do" Sam told her.

Alex would do everything she could to make sure of it. Now, she turned to Fury. "Thank you again. For _all _of this."

"Good luck out there, Markos." Fury said, watching as the young woman walked away. No longer was Alexis Markos the angry, lonesome, lost girl he found in Boston. She was officially an Avenger; not because of the suit, or the ammo, or the people she was about to embark on this mission with. She was an Avenger because of the risks she was willing to take to protect and serve.

With a lingering smile, Fury turned away and headed out of the hangar.

* * *

A strange thing always happened to Alex whenever she felt really nervous. A song from some obscure moment in her past would pop into her mind and get stuck there until her nerves receded. Right now, as she paced in the back of the Quinjet, a Bob Seger song from one of her mother's old favorite albums rolled over and over in her agitated mind:

_ Sometimes at night, I see their faces_   
_ I feel the traces they've left on my soul_   
_ And those are the memories_   
_ That make me a wealthy soul_

_How ironic, _ Alex thought as she paced. Of all the songs, the one about memories and souls had to be the one stuck in her brain. She could almost see her mom carrying the tune as she drove her home from school. Her carefree spirit would brighten Alex's otherwise dark days at school. It didn't matter what song or how poorly she hit some of the notes, it always used to make Alex smile. Perhaps those really were the memories that made her a wealthy soul.

And so Alex continued to pace, lost in her thoughts about the mission (and the lyrics of that damn song). She didn't exit those thoughts until Tony found her there.

When Tony realized Alex was pacing, he couldn't help the smile that broke across his face. Only a few months ago, he'd found Alex doing the same thing outside the door to his office. Now, she was practically wearing a rut into the steel floor of the aircraft.

"Not to interrupt," he said, purposely interrupting, "but it feels a little like you could use some company?"

Alex halted. Apparently, she'd been so deep inside her own brain that she hadn't even heard him approach. "Why is it always _you _who catches me when I'm being ridiculously nervous?"

Tony shrugged as he came closer. "My timing has always been somewhat flawless._" _He said this with a great deal of humor...and sarcasm. He watched Alex's shoulders slump. "But I'm not here to harass you."

"Oh? I thought that was your specialty?"

He noted the hint of jest in her tone. "In all honesty, I wanted to check in on you." With some memory, he recalled doing this very thing a few months ago himself. Funny how history was weirdly repeating itself. Not to mention that Alex seemed surprised by his admission, but judging by the way the light danced a little brighter in her dark eyes, Tony figured she appreciated him being there. Or at least, she appreciated his honesty.

"Any words of wisdom for me before I do this?" Alex asked him.

The proud way she held herself faltered, but only slightly. Tony knew the stress she was under, and he also knew what it was like to try and hide it. In fact, he excelled at it. "Yes. Several words of wisdom, if you'll hear me out."

"I'm all ears."

"You know what you're up against, so I won't remind you how awful those things are" he told her matter-of-factly. "But there's plenty of good you can take from them. All of which you know how to handle: Super-human speed. Heightened senses. Increased flexibility. And of course, some degree of invincibility." He paused. "Make sure you _use them_."

Alex was grateful for the reminder. She wasn't entirely sure once she did the transfer if she'd be in her right mind, or even have control of it as much as she normally did. Anything was possible, but she hoped for the best. "_And _the hive mentality."

Tony snapped his fingers. "Use _that _most of all. Not a single one of us have the ability to do what you're about to do, so that - above all else - could be the difference maker."

It's the one thing Alex had been contemplating when Tony found her pacing. If she could enter their minds, using their mirrored traits and physical abilities, the operation might be easier than she expected.

"If you get in a pinch, Steve and I will be right there. We'll be watching you every step of the way." After a moment's hesitation, Tony pulled a small rectangular case out of his pocket. It was hard-sided like a cargo crate, but no bigger than a wallet. "These are all I was able to make, so use them wisely."

He handed to small case over to Alex, who looked at him with question. "What is it?"

"A kind of antidote I've been dabbling with in my spare time." Tony watched as Alex opened the case, revealing three fully loaded syringes. An opaque turquoise blue liquid was suspended within each of them. "I was going to test it on the sample we brought back, but..." He facially shrugged. "You see how far that got."

Alex lifted one of the syringes out and examined it in her gloved hand. The liquid was strangely beautiful, but the look of it left her with an ominous feeling. "I'm guessing these are fatal?"

"Correct. And, since I wasn't able to make enough, stick to taking out each of the 'mother hybrids', wherever those might be. Assuming there even _is _such a thing." Tony knew he sounded unconvinced, but him and the others never even made it into the facility. Whether the theory of a 'mother hybrid' was even real was still unknown, even to him. "Consider the third one a bonus."

Alex placed the needle back in the case and clicked it shut. "I'll guard these with my life."

Tony pulled one more item out of his other pocket. It was another syringe, similar in size and make to the others but with a bright green liquid inside. He wiggled the syringe in his fingers. "And _this one_\- this one's all yours."

"Mine_?_" Alex suddenly felt like their talk had turned morbid. "You don't mean..."

"No, no, this isn't fatal." Tony stared down at the syringe, rolling it in his fingers. "My goal with this was to make sure you don't need to wear that collar. I wanted to make sure that as long as Steve and I were a part of this mission, you wouldn't have to." As he suspected, Alex went to argue, but he held a patient hand up to her. "I don't care that you're being strong and trying to put on a brave face, I _know _that thing fucked you up last time. I may have never seen you wearing it, but I saw you later that night. I watch people. I observe others when no one thinks I am. And you were a pretty open book that night, for as well as you tried to keep it together." He smiled at her. "Plus, I owe you one. For...you know...the night of the psyche-memory-emotions thing we did in your living room."

"You don't owe me anything."

"I do." Tony nodded at the syringe as Alex took it from him. "This is the very least I can do."

Alex stared at the green liquid. "So if this isn't fatal, I'm afraid to ask what it will do to me, exactly."

"It was a brilliant idea on my part, if I do say so myself" Tony beamed. "It's the same formula as the others, which should completely destroy the creature the second it enters their fucked up bloodstream. I played around a little and was able to remove the fatal strain. So basically, _this _will do the same thing the collar would: remove your powers, but only those transferred from the hybrid. Oh, and it'll probably knock you out pretty good, but that's just a temporary side effect. Consider it a way to cancel your membership if you can't stand being part of their hive anymore."

Alex was always amazed as the casual way Tony spoke about his inventions and creations. What she was holding in her hand was scientifically mind-boggling, but to Tony he was just 'playing around'. Alex was wholly impressed to say the least. She handed Tony back the syringe. "Once again, you and your gifts have left me speechless."

"You're not the first woman to tell me that." He pocketed the syringe and grinned. "I'm pulling for ya, Alex. Really, I am. After you helped me that night, you left _me _speechless. I couldn't even fully describe to Pepper what I felt or what you did, but it made a difference. If there was a way I could ensure you had a little help on this mission, then it was just a small way of repaying you for the help you gave me."

Their matching brown eyes met, and for a second, Tony thought Alex was going to cry. Instead, she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him.

"You didn't even have to do that" she uttered quietly. "But it means more to me than you could know."

Tony rubbed her back, unable to keep from smiling. He wasn't the best at mushy moments, but the hug spoke for the both of them. He liked Markos. He had her wrong in the beginning; misjudging her and her powers out of fear. Yes, fear. He feared the worst with her, but found she wasn't so unlike the rest of them. Her relationship with Barnes was evidence that her powers could actually help others and bring them together. After Tony agreed to try the trial run (months after he finally got over his fear), it had benefited him and had strengthened the budding friendship he and Markos had with one another. For all the ways her powers had driven people away from her in her life, Alexis' powers had brought her and the rest of the Avengers together.

Steve entered the back of the aircraft, one hand on the doorframe as he leaned inward. "We're about 20 minutes out."

Alex tried to exhale the nerves that suddenly filled her body. "Guess it's go time, huh?"

"We'll be right beside you" Tony told her. From the doorway, Steve gave her a reassuring nod.

"Last chance to back out" he offered.

"Like hell. I'm ready to end these ugly bastards." She pushed past the both of them and led the way back to the crate.

Behind her, Tony double-tapped his arc reactor and the red and gold plates of his suit appeared and covered his entire body. Steve maintained a protective position behind Alex, guarding her as they entered the room with the crate. The thing began to screech in the ear-piercing manner it had since they caught it. Steve's enhanced hearing made it hard for him to be in the same room as the monster, but he wanted to be there for the transfer. Alexis was his responsibility from this moment forward; if she needed him, he promised to be there. He swore to himself he'd bring her back to Bucky in one piece, just as he swore to do the same to Alex a day ago.

Alex knelt in front of the crate, coming eye-to-eye with the hybrid. Being this close gave her a whole new perspective on its artificial design. It was bigger than a carnivorous feline, and way, _way _uglier. It had no real distinct head; just an oblong shape covered in layers of loose folds around its neck that blended into its body. She remembered those folds, but even more so she remembered the stench of death. Alex felt her stomach roll over the first whiff she got of it.

She looked back at Tony and Steve as she hit the button that removed the gloved part of her suit. "You two ready?"

"Ready" they replied in unison. Steve stood behind her, shield ready in case something went wrong. Tony engaged his helmet, the slits of his eyes glowing white beneath.

Cautiously, Alex lifted a hand towards the creature. Deep inside, Alex felt her powers come alive with ferocity she'd not felt before. Her entire body was like a live wire, humming and flickering from within as she focused on the well from which she gathered those powers. She lined her hand up with the chest of the hybrid, well away from its face so it couldn't hurt her, and closed her eyes.

In those final few seconds before she made the connection, Alex thought of Bucky. She tried to picture his face when he told her he loved her for the first time. She recalled the wholeness she felt when she was with him. He was her teammate, her partner, her friend, and someone she would avenge this very night.

A comforting warmth spread through Alex's body that steadied her. She put her open palm on the creature and began.

Almost instantly, her body jerked; her head tossing backward as the first onslaught of foreign power entered her body. The white light that encircled her spread outward and onto the hybrid's body. In response, it hissed and screamed in protest as it felt Alex enter inside of it, but it never broke Alex's concentration. She focused the energy within her, forcing it to push beyond the unearthly obstacles she encountered once inside the creature's psyche. When she locked onto its powers, her body opened to the transformation about to take place.

A scream originated deep inside Alex's chest, exploding through her and splitting the silence inside the Quinjet.

The scream took Steve and Tony by surprise. Steve turned to him in alarm, but Tony lifted a plated hand telling him to wait. Neither moved or spoke, waiting through Alex's pained scream. Within a few seconds, she grew silent once more. Her head lolled forward, but her hand remained on the creature. The monster bellowed, and the white light emitting from Alex grew brighter. Slowly but surely, the transfer was taking place.

Inside, Alex felt like her body was splitting in half. Her blood felt cold, as if icy steel liquid traveled through her hands into her chest and outward to her limbs. She grit her teeth, feeling through the pain as the transformation continued. It was unlike any transfer she'd done before. Transfers were normally a smooth and easy ordeal, but now...now she encountered pain that rattled her entire body. She could feel her muscle fibers tearing as they took on the characteristics of the hybrid, enhancing her and giving her their power. The creature continued to wail, but Alex hung on.

Somehow, in all the moments she and Bucky had worked on this together, her control had grown stronger than she realized. When she did the trial run with Tony, it took almost the same amount of energy and focus as she was using in that very moment with the hybrid. All the work she'd done the past few months had amounted to something, and it never counted more than it did in those final moments.

When the transfer was complete, the creature fell silent. Its deformed figure slumped within the crate, no longer suspended by the blue field of energy around it. Alex had taken every last ounce of what it had to offer her, leaving nothing behind but the shell of its body.

When she lowered her hand, Alex toppled backwards. Steve caught her, helping her to stand. "Markos?"

Alex blinked exactly once before her eyesight adjusted to that of the hybrid's. Everything was enhanced, but the coloring wasn't that of her human eyesight. Instead, she saw things in shades bright yellows, oranges, and reds. _Infrared_.

Steve helped her upright, but it didn't take much for Alex to adjust to the strength she now felt. "You alright?" he asked her.

Tony took a cautious step forward. "You still with us, Markos?"

Alex could hear both Tony and Steve talking to her, but she could hear so much more. Inside her brain were dozens of voices, and they were all the same. Each was a voice of the creatures waiting below at the facility, and one stronger voice belonging to the mother hybrid from which Hydra created all the others. It was a foreign language. Basic. Animalistic. Full of anger. All of them were repeating their one desire: _kill._

Steve was starting to feel nervous as doubt crept into his mind. Alex just stood there, staring at the ground. Her breathing was slightly elevated, and her bare hands were balled into fists at her side. "Markos?" He wanted to touch her, just to see if it would break her out of whatever trance she had entered. "Are you...still one of us?"

When Alex finally lifted her gaze, the chocolate brown of her eyes now glowed a pale golden yellow.

"Bring me to them" she said. It didn't even sound like her own voice when she heard herself.

Tony disengaged his helmet as he looked at Steve. "What the hell's with her eyes?"

"I don't know, but we gotta move." Steve placed his shield onto his back and headed for the cockpit.

Alex remained standing, staring off at nothing. Chilling voices spun round in her mind. _Kill. Kill. Kill. _Her powers burned in her hands. _Kill. Kill. Kill. _She heard them. She could sense them in the facility. In cages. Waiting. Pawing at the bars of their pens. They wanted her, but she wanted _them _more.

"Hey, Alexis - look at me. Talk to me." Tony turned her towards him, forcing her eyes - those new eyes - to meet his. "Are you in there?"

"Yes" she answered coldly.

"Do you have control of yourself?"

"Yes."

"Okay, that's a start."

_Kill. Kill. Kill. _ The voices wouldn't stop inside Alex's mind. They drowned most other sounds out, making Tony's voice seem like it was down a long tunnel. She forced herself to compartmentalize the sounds, utilizing her own skills and those of the hybrids in order to focus.

"Are you connected to their hive mentally?" Tony asked, still worried. Alex's face was so blank; all her personality seemed to have left her.

"Yes. I hear them." She flexed her hands at her side. "They want to kill. _I _want to kill."

Tony's eyebrows rose and he rubbed his goatee. "Okay, but, uhh... _which side _do you want to kill?"

Her pretty face turned wicked. "Their side."

"Well that's a relief" Tony exhaled. He glanced over at the lifeless creature in the crate. The blue aura had disappeared now that it sensed nothing was alive for it to control within it. Its body lay in a half-shriveled lump. The sight of it sent a chill down Tony's spine.

Steve returned to the back room, grabbing both of their attentions. "Cloaking device has been activated. We'll be on the ground in 5 minutes." He stared at Alex, wary of the golden hue of her eyes and what she might be able to sense with them. "We follow your lead" he told her.

Alex grabbed the grenade rifle and strapped it across her back. "My belt."

Steve handed Alexis the utility belt she always wore on her suit. Instead of just knives and guns, she now had dozens of hand grenades strapped around it. The irony of the moment, though Bucky wasn't there to see it, was that Steve thought Alex actually resembled Bucky once she donned all her weapons. She still moved with that quiet, deadly grace she always had, but the super strength she now shared with the hybrids allowed her to move with a new level of power.

When the Quinjet settled onto the ground, Steve raised his hand to his ear. "Connecting comms in 3...2...1..."

Tony and Alex synced their earpieces to his as the hatch opened behind them. Without another look back, Alex headed down the platform and into the night with one goal in mind: to kill everyone and everything that hurt Bucky and Natasha.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Author's note: I know Bucky wasn't a prominent fixture in this chapter, but it was important to give the other characters some time to hash out the plan that will take us into the final chapters of this tale. Bucky returns in an important role in the next chapter (and beyond, of course), so stay tuned. Thank you again for all the kudos, follows, bookmarks, and most of all - the comments. They really do make my day. But I see all the various ways you show your support for the story, and I appreciate each and every one of them!**


	20. Chapter 20

The guards at the facility's entrance never saw Alex coming. She was nothing more than a shadow to them. Her suit and her speed made her nearly impossible to detect, especially in the darkness of night that shrouded the facility.

In one swift move, Alex hurtled a small ninja star at the throat of one of the guards. He fell to the ground choking on his own blood.

The second guard, alarmed by the sudden death of his partner, went to grab his pistol but was too slow. Alex's feet were as light and fast as a cheetah. She use the dead body of the first guard to catapult herself on top of the second guard. With a quick twist of his neck, he fell to the ground before Alex even landed back on her feet.

The super speed she acquired from the hybrids allowed her to bypass all external warning systems without tripping a single one. If there was any reason to thank one of those horrible creatures, Alex figured this might be it.

She pulled the key card from the guard's lanyard and swiped it through the security panel near the door. With a satisfying _swoosh_, the heavy metal door glided open. She entered, tossing the card behind her before the door closed again.

Before Alex could even hear the creatures, she felt them. Their minds were connected to hers now, especially in such close proximity. Their foreign voices and screams pummeled her brain, but she held onto her focus and continued her way through the facility. She heard human voices too, but not many. She could sense their heat through her improved vision, and could also feel their auras pulsating throughout the facility.

Avoiding those heat signatures, Alex blew through the hallways using her super human speed. Any guard she saw, she had their necks snapped before they realized she was even there. Luckily, she only had to remove two very unlucky guards that stood in front of the hybrid-generation room. Just hearing the artificial, alien-like screams gave the room away, but Alex could feel their beating hearts. It felt as if hers was a part of all of theirs, all beating in an unnatural succession. It was an unsettling feeling, but it drove her to make quick work of what lay ahead.

After another swipe of a borrowed key card, Alex was inside. What she saw, however, was something out of a sci-fi horror film.

On a platform near the end of the long room was a horrific looking amalgamation of some kind of predator...or whatever kind of predator it used to be before Hydra claimed it. It had the body of something like a lion or a panther, but was very clearly mixed with physicality of the Chitauri. All the skin had been stripped away, replaced by an artificial leather-like outer layer. Tubes were attached like tentacles to various parts of its body, with liquid streaming into some and out of others. All the liquid traveled to other containers where bodies of future hybrids were kept, suspended in a clear gel to incubate and grow to their full size.

It was gross and inhumane and reeked of Hydra. The sight of it made Alex's hate for them even stronger. Inside her brain, she heard the full-grown hybrids in the rows of cages calling to her. They were welcoming her. They were asking her to kill.

Oh she would kill, all right.

Given her newly enhanced eyesight, Alex could detect the heat of the laser sensor grid surrounding the mother hybrid and the growing samples. It was invisible to the naked eye, of course - but not to Alex. Layers and layers of laser lines meshed together in angles that no human would be able to avoid unless they disabled it. Unfortunately, she didn't have that kind of time. She wouldn't be as lucky as she'd been outside, but she was prepared for it.

Alex pulled out one of the syringes that Tony had given her, doing her best to quiet the sound of the hybrids inside her mind. She removed the cap with her teeth, gave a test squirt, then set her eyes on the prototype hybrid at the end of the room. Closing her eyes to muster all the force behind her new powers, she let the energy within her to build up...like a slingshot being pulled backward to its fullest extent. When her muscles began to shake and her insides felt like they were being stretched to the brink, Alex let go in an explosion of power.

The second she was on the mother hybrid, alarms began to sound.

With a screech, the creature beneath her hissed and strained against the tubes in its sides. With all the power left in her, Alex slammed the needle of the syringe down into the base of its neck, puncturing the impervious layer. Within seconds of emptying the liquid, the creature was dead.

Every single hybrid in the room began to wail. Alarms atop the containers with the growing bodies flashed red, blaring horns to sound a new alarm. All the lights inside the room went out.

None of it mattered to Alex.

She could see perfectly. She could smell the fear coming from the agents who were rushing to get to the room. All of it made her smile.

Grabbing the gun from behind her, Alex loaded three full grenades and waited for the door to open. In her chaotic mind filled with the screams of dying hybrids, Alex remembered Bucky's pointers for firing a grenade rifle.

_ Keep it low. Don't overcompensate the angle of the nose. Brace your core. _

She held it close to her waist, kept the nose straight, and tightened every inch of her upgraded muscles.

When the first round of Hydra agents appeared, she fired the grenade. Just like in her lesson with Bucky, it gave quite a kick to her smaller frame but Alex was ready for it. The explosion tore through five agents, sending body parts flying in every direction as the orange glow of the blast lit up the room.

The explosion was Tony and Steve's signal.

With the second grenade, Alex fired it at the left side of the room, blasting through the cages of hybrids. Some fought free of their constraints, but they were weakened now without their prototype. Alex fired the third and final grenade as the right side of the room, taking out that row of cages as well. The remainder of the weakened and wounded creatures she killed with ball grenades as she walked calmly out of the room.

Alex stepped through the smoking, burnt doorway to see Iron Man fly overhead. She followed him with her eyes, watching as he shot towards the second level of the facility. Blasts from various parts of his suit began to decimate the room where most of Hydra's core operations were contained.

Steve's shield rang somewhere nearby. It was the most beautiful sound Alex ever heard. With no more hybrid voices inside her mind chewing at her psyche and scattering her thoughts, she was able to take in the sight around her. With a smile on her face, she watched her teammates finish the job.

Facility Number 1 was successfully destroyed.

Facility Number 2 was next.

* * *

When Bucky first opened his eyes, he forgot where he was. The starch white surroundings left him feeling disoriented, and his sluggish brain didn't help the situation. He blinked a few times only to discover that his body was just as sluggish. When he tried to push himself into a seated position, someone rushed to help him.

"Not so fast, buddy. You've been through the ringer."

"Wilson?" Bucky blinked again, struggling to see clearly.

"You're coming off some pretty hefty drugs, so just take it slow. Here - let me." Sam pressed a button on the side of the bed, raising it a little to give Bucky a better angle to sit up.

This allowed Bucky to adjust the pillow behind his head, which hurt like a son of a bitch. His ears felt full of liquid, if that was even possible. "Alexis..." He rubbed his eyes, which helped a little. They came into focus to see Sam taking a seat on a plastic chair next to his bed. "Is she okay?"

"Here, drink this." Sam handed Bucky a Styrofoam cup. "The nurse told me to give you this whenever you woke up."

Bucky almost salivated at the thought of water. He couldn't remember the last time he drank anything, so he ended up chugging the small cup of liquid in one swallow. Instead of water, it was something viscous and chalky. "Fuck, what is that?" He handed the cup back to Sam with a curled lip.

"Not sure, but you drank that a lot faster than I would have" he said with a chuckle.

Bucky actually felt a little of his strength return. Whatever the nasty concoction was, it seemed to be working. His eyes cleared and his brain felt a little less shaken, but his memories were as jumbled as ever. The last vivid memory he could recall was getting attacked, but he also sort of remembered being brought into the medic room. Everything was so blurry. He felt weak and useless, and his confusion made him angry.

"How do you feel now?" Sam asked.

"Horrible."

"Need another cup of the tasty stuff?"

Bucky glared at him.

"Because I can get you another cup of the tasty stuff."

"How about just some water" Bucky said flatly.

Sam stood and nodded. "That I can definitely do."

Bucky watched as Sam left him alone with his thoughts. His side ached with a pain that resonated deep beneath the surface. Since he was shirtless and his eyesight was clearer, he chanced a look down at the bandaged wound at his waist. In doing so, his eyes saw something he wasn't expecting. A silver chain containing two dog tags lay resting in the center of his chest.

_Those are my tags._

Fear began to knot in the pit of Bucky's stomach.

_They should be on Alexis, but they aren't. _

_Something isn't right._

He could feel his breathing turn ragged as troublesome thoughts came on hard and fast. Next to the bed, alarms started beeping from his heart rate monitor. The ticking line that indicated its pace began to pulse frantically.

Feeling cornered by fear, Bucky ripped the IV needle from his arm, then yanked the sensors stuck to his abs and pushed himself off the bed. A rush of pain shot from his waist up to his head, causing him to waver. He placed a hand on his side and groaned low in his throat. Waves of pain tore through his abdomen, threatening to overwhelm him.

Doing his best to get a hold of himself, Bucky staggered towards the window that looked in on the nurses' station. The floor seemed to teeter as the pain continued, but he swallowed it. When he got to the glass, he hammered his metal fist against it. "_Where is Alexis!?_"

The nurses jumped in their chairs at the sound. They turned their frightened eyes towards Sam, who remained still as stone across the glass.

Bucky ground his jaw. "Where is she, Wilson!?" His face was pressed almost totally against the glass. "_Tell me where she is!" _

Sam quickly crossed the distance separating them, exiting the nurses' station back into the medic room. Whatever happened in those last few minutes had changed Bucky's total demeanor. His eyes were wild with fear, his face a splotchy crimson red. His dark hair fell over his brow, which now gleamed with a fresh sheen of sweat. "You have _got _to calm down, Barnes. I'll tell you where she is if you just calm down."

Bucky felt his hands tremble. His body was hot and his eyes throbbed as he met Sam's gaze. _Something wasn't right. _His goddamn sluggish brain wasn't working the way he needed it to, so all he felt was adrenaline coursing unchecked through his weakened body. The thought of losing Alex became real, and it scared him to death. "Where is she?" His voice was crippled by the pain of his fear. He clutched at the chain near his chest. "My tags...they're supposed to be with_her_."

"She wanted me to tell you everything when you woke up" Sam said, trying to steady him. He looked like a wild animal; lost and scared and injured. "Her, Steve, and Tony are on a mission."

"Mission?" Bucky repeated. The words didn't even seem real as they left his mouth.

"She made the decision to do a transfer with the hybrid so she could end them once and for all."

The color drained from Bucky's face.

"She wanted me to tell you it was her decision" Sam continued. "And I can confirm it was all hers because I was there." He gave Bucky a chance to process the information, watching as he kept his gaze directed at the floor but not really looking at anything. In fact, Bucky hardly moved. After his bout of intense anger, Sam was more worried now by his lack of response. "Barnes?"

Bucky lifted his head, revealing eyes burdened with fear. "Do you know if it worked? The transfer?"

Sam shook his head. "I wish I did. Lines have been silent since they left."

"You said Steve's with her?"

"Yes. And Stark."

Bucky exhaled. There weren't two better people to help her than Steve and Tony. Bucky knew Steve would protect her. He promised nothing would happen to her, and he knew Steve would keep that promise.

He ground his palms into his burning eyes, feeling helpless and alone. He was surrounded by people, but the only two people he loved in this miserable life were together on a mission that had already failed once. He didn't believe in odds. Wouldn't believe in them. But the odds weren't good. And all he could do was wait. He couldn't help her. He couldn't be by her side. He couldn't do anything but accept her decision...and he would.

Alexis had always been her own woman. Since the first day Bucky laid eyes on her, she'd been a beautiful combination of stunning and stubborn. She was strong-willed, with a fire inside her that burned regardless of whether she was with him or not. It was what he loved about her; she was as kind as she was determined, with a sense of humor that challenged him and a desire to prove he was worthy of the love she gave him. Together, they were partners. They were teammates. They were lovers.

But beyond all this, Alex was as strong of an individual as she was part of a team. Bucky knew she could - and would - take care of herself. He'd seen it before and he felt it with all his heart. If this truly was her choice, then he trusted her. Perhaps the past few weeks of their training would help her. He could only hope so.

But the thought of losing her...

Sam was there to catch him when he faltered. "Sam..."

"I'm here, Barnes. Let's get you back to the bed." Over his shoulder, Sam motioned for the nurses to come and help him. Both entered into the room and helped guide Bucky back to the bed. They readied a fresh IV and straightened the blankets that had gone askew as Sam propped him into a comfortable position.

Bucky's eyelids grew heavy as the air seemed to leave his chest. His head pounded. His throat was raw. A fever burned in the wound at his side, making it hard for him to concentrate. He felt his world fade from view as they pierced his arm once more, feeding him more drugs that would take him back to a more peaceful state. He muttered Alexis' name deliriously until he drifted back into his medically induced slumber.

* * *

The destruction of Facility #2 didn't go as smoothly for Alex, Steve, and Tony as the first facility did. It started out as flawless as the first facility's take-down, but they lost control right around the time Alex shoved the syringe into the neck of the second (and final) prototype hybrid. She'd done exactly as she had before: wound up, used her speed to blow through the alarms, and then killed the prototype. Alex drove the needle home inside the prototype's leathery neck to a chorus of alarms blaring. The rows of hybrids wailed in protest, feeling the connection to their life force cut off. She leapt from the center table where the dead creature's body now lay and readied her grenades. Feeling like the end was near and victory was close, she loaded the rifle with a brewing sense of triumph. She tried to contain herself, knowing it wasn't over until the fat lady sung...but as far as she was concerned, the fat lady was practically warming up her vocal cords.

With steadiness in her stance, Alex fired the initial grenade towards the entrance to the laboratory, giving Steve and Tony the signal they needed. The trouble began when she fired the next grenade into the first row of hybrids. When the blast exploded through the cages and decimated the creatures within them, the doors to the second row of cages all opened in unison. Whether it was done internally by someone, or via an unknown alarm system that was tripped, Alex never knew.

As the creatures fled their pens, their ugly screams deafened Alex's enhanced hearing. She dropped the rifle, her mind overtaken by the utter confusion of dozens of hybrids bellowing inside her skull. Each of the bones of her face rattled individually as if they were about to shatter. Alex fell to her knees, clutching at her head in agony.

Without their mother hybrid, the remaining hybrids scattered aimlessly around her. Some attacked one another while others ran for the exit. Several more set their sights on Alex in her compromised state. She sensed their heat as they came towards her. When she lifted her head, she saw several pairs of golden yellow eyes honing in on her. Their color was fading as they weakened, but there was still a desire to kill within them.

_Focus, Alexis. _

Squeals of delight were heard all around her. Whether it was inside her mind or outside her, she could no longer tell.

_Focus. They're weakened. You can overpower them._

With as much energy as she could muster, Alex rose to her feet. The hybrids took it as a signal. The first attacked her head-on, lunging and slashing at her. Alex blocked the slash with her arm, then spun and kicked the creature dead center in the face. It went flying backwards into one of its kin, toppling them both into the corner of the laboratory.

The howling grew louder within Alex's mind as the creatures called to one another, warning of the danger she presented. They came on faster, but Alex blocked and punched and rolled them off of her. The smell of death was all around her, their movements frantic and sloppy without their prototype. Her muscles reacted with the same strength and agility of the hybrids that attacked her, but she wondered how much longer it would take until they became too weak to fight.

"Hey Rogers!?" Alex swung a fist and punched another of the hybrids as it lunged at her. "I need some help down here!" Another two hybrids dove at her with their screaming mouths aimed for her head. Alex successfully blocked and defended each of their attacks, tossing two ball grenades into their mouths before catapulting out of the way. The explosions pummeled her with the sludge of their disintegrated bodies, which she wiped off her face with disgust. "Rogers! Stark! Do you copy? I need backup!"

They never radioed back, and that made Alex more nervous than the attack she was currently trying to handle.

_Fine_. _I'll do this the old fashioned way, _she thought. _Alone. _

Using the power of her transferred strength, Alex jumped and dodged each of the hybrids that tried to come for her. Her flexibility made her feel like a gymnast; catapulting off surfaces, using anything solid in her way to get an edge on them. Their weakness was her advantage, as was their hive connection inside her mind. She quickly learned that she could sense their movement before they attacked, anticipating them and aiming ball grenade after ball grenade at their gaping mouths. One by one, Alex picked them off. The more she killed, the quieter the voices inside her head became.

Exhausted, out of breath, and with a throbbing ache being her eyes, Alex managed a back flip onto the platform where the dead mother hybrid lay. She landed on her feet with her hands braced on the floor, crouched and ready for the last hybrid to attack. It lined itself up to her, ready to run dead on and attack her from the front.

_Come on, you son of a bitch. _ Alex reached out to it through their mental hive bond. It screamed at her, a sickly yellow froth dripping from its mouth. She could tell it was weakening, but its desire to kill was stronger than its deteriorating body.

_Come on. Let's end this!_

The hybrid's scream nearly split Alex's skull in two. It sprinted for her, leaping up over lab furniture strewn about the floor as it aimed for the platform. Alex fingered the ball grenade in her hand, pressing the detonation button that would begin the 5-second countdown. She waited...counted the seconds...timed it just right...then tossed the ball into the mouth that was lunging right at her.

Her aim was perfect.

The grenade exploded, erupting in a spray of marbled leather skin and bone. Black blood rained down on Alex, covering her in a sticky, pungent substance that coated her from head to toe. The smell was nauseating to the point it made her lightheaded. With one of her gloved hands, Alex wiped the gunk from her face. Whatever their blood was made of wasn't human. It was greasy like tar and bubbled against the material of her suit. She tried to wipe more of it off her as she stood, but a voice behind her caught the very air in her lungs. She turned in alarm, blood dripping down her face.

A man ran forward, screaming something at her in a foreign language. He held a small device with a red button in his hand, shaking it at her as his voice frantically yelled something over and over. It was a Hydra agent, for sure, but who he was or what influence he had here was unknown to her. His clothes gave nothing away, and Alex sure as hell couldn't understand what he was screaming at her.

She raised her hands, trying to make herself seem less threatening. "I don't understand you!" Her eyes lowered to the device in the man's hands. "English? Do you speak English!?"

The man pointed the device at her, appearing as though he was going to push the button. His face was twisted with fear; the same fear Alex could plainly hear in his frenzied speech.

"No, no - don't push!" Alex waved her hands, trying to tell him no but seeing sweat dripping down his face. "I'll stop! Just let me go! See? I'm walking away!" She took a few steps backwards, never taking her eyes off the man. "Just let me go, okay!? No more harm. No more fighting."

The man's breathing came in short, ragged wheezes. Alex could see the whites of his eyes as she backed away, careful not to move too abruptly. When she got to the part of the platform where the dead hybrid prototype lay lifeless, the man shouted at her. Again, it was in his native language and was delivered in the same agitated tone as before.

_Fuck, what is he saying?! What the hell is that button? _

Alex kept her hands up as she took one cautious step over the body. When her second foot cleared the body, the man pushed the red button.

Alex froze. In front of her, the tentacle-like tubes attached to the prototype disengaged from its body and rose to life. Their ends, now glowing bright red, all turned and faced her like antennae. Rows of tiny needles emerge from the glowing red ends like some sadistic alien leech. They sensed her connection to the hive, the heat emanating from her, the powers she borrowed from the other hybrid.

The glowing red tentacles lunged at Alex as she sprung into a backwards flip. It was enough to avoid two of the tentacles, but the other two grabbed on to her. Their needles tried to pierce the impervious Wakandan material of her suit and failed, but Alex still felt the force of their attempt digging into her skin. The slammed into her body and knocked her down, then began worming around her to get at the exposed skin of her face. Alex grabbed on to one of the arms and used it to sling herself back onto her feet. The other metal arms wriggled and wound about the table, but it was no use. Her martial art skills and her enhanced powers outmatched their limited movements.

Springing off one of the tubed arms, Alex landed beyond the length of the table and began to sprint towards the man. He was muttering wildly now, and he dropped the small handheld device as he began to flee. He was too slow for Alex. She kicked him in the back, knocking him onto his face on the floor. He lifted his head just in time to see the heel of her boot smash his device to pieces.

Behind them, the tentacled arms slowed to a stop.

Alex was exhausted, in pain, and angry. Vitriol flowed through her veins like venom, fueling her hate for Hydra as she stared at the man below her. She rolled the man forcefully onto his back and crouched over him.

"I am sick and tired of you people." She tipped her head so her eyes were directly lined up with his, forcing the coward to stare at her. "I'm done with your fucked up looking experimental pets. I'm done with your sadistic little organization hurting the people I love. And I'm DONE with this mission."

Alex retracted the glove to one of her hands and held up her palm.

"Consider this payback for hurting my soldier."

She palmed the man's face and closed her eyes. His scream vibrating against her hand, so she gripped even harder. She dug her nails into the flesh of his face until he bled. In her mind, she could see his recent memories, past memories, pain, joy, love, fear. She blew past all of them, going to the very heart of his psyche with all the power she had left within her. He screamed against her hand, but Alex never let up. She dove head first into the darkness of his past with Hydra, watching as the memories of all the horrible things he'd done flashed before her.

_ Torture.  
_ _ Killing.  
_ _ Sensory deprivation.  
_ _ Pain.  
_ _ Suffering.  
_ _ Isolation.  
Delight in other's misery. _

Alex turned the emotions back on him, forcing him to feel each emotion individually as if he was experiencing them instead of causing them.

The unadulterated anger she felt threatened her control. She could have gone further than she did. Her anger for what Hydra had done to Bucky, both in the past and in the present, was enough for her to lose control and take everything she could from the man.

But it wasn't just his fault.  
This one man was only a fraction of an entire entity of evil.

The lab, the creatures, the horrible things Hydra created...it wasn't just one person's doing, but decades and decades of evil done by the hands of hundreds of individuals. The men on Comoros Island. The agents in Thimphu who put her in a collar. The lab workers who made the hybrids. Dr. Matheson and his team of slime balls. Hydra was an entity that required all of the Avengers and all of their talents to take down. Snuffing out this one man's life wouldn't solve anything. It wouldn't make Bucky better. It wouldn't heal the hurts of his past. It wouldn't prove anything to anyone, and Alex knew it. Their fight against Hydra would wage on whether she killed this man or not, and this wasn't the way she wanted to avenge the people she loved.

With exercised control, Alex withdrew her hand.

It took her a second as she returned to her normal state, feeling her powers retract back into her and out of the man. When they finished and Alex opened her eyes, she stood. She gazed down at the man as he slowly regained consciousness. His breathing was weak, but he was alive. When he looked up, his eyes widened in horror like nothing Alex had ever seen. He muttered something in his native tongue, sounding timid and scared.

Alex took a few steps back. "Go. Get out of here, before I change my mind." She waved her hand at the door, giving him an out. He scrambled to his feet, slipping on patches of black blood stuck to the floor. He half-limped, half-ran out of the room. Where he went, Alex didn't care. For all she knew, Steve or Tony took care of him outside.

With her mind devoid of any hybrid screams or the memories of evil men, Alex leaned against the wall and slowly slumped to the floor. Her body was spent. The ache she felt in her chest made her wonder if it was an injury, or just her tired soul. She was tired of fighting. She was tired of hurting. She closed her eyes and rested, doing her best not to think about anything.

She had no idea how long she sat there among the broken lab equipment and the dead creatures. When Tony and Steve emerged through the wreckage, they found her propped against the wall and covered in black goop. Steve stared in awe at the carnage strewn about the room. Even Tony took a second to admire the work she'd done in their absence.

Alex saw them approach and gave a weak smile. "Long time no see, Fellas."

Steve knelt and inspected her with troubled eyes. "You did all this?"

"Don't act so surprised, Rogers."

The corner of his mouth ticked upwards. "Are you alright?"

"I could use a shower, but I should be fine."

Steve's tiny smirk turned into a full-blown smile. "Glad to hear it." He extended his hand and helped her to her feet.

"Everything else taken care of?" she asked. The look Tony and Steve gave one another was all the assurance she needed.

"I'd say Hydra won't be making any more of these things." Tony gave a rather distasteful glance at the dismembered hybrid bodies around the room.

Alex was relieved to hear it. "You still have that medicine you showed me before we started all this?"

Tony pressed a button on his suit, revealing a compartment that opened on his forearm. He brought out the syringe with the green liquid, much to Steve's surprise.

"What is that!?" His face was bent with alarm.

"An easier way out of Hydra's hive." Tony pulled the cap off the needle. "You sure, Markos?"

Steve stared at Alexis, not understanding anything he was seeing.

She placed a comforting hand on his arm. "Tony developed a way to get the hybrid connection out of me quickly." She rolled the sleeve of her suit up, exposing the inside of her arm. "I might be knocked out for a while, but it's the best method of ending this."

Before Tony inserted the needle, Alex met Steve's gaze with a smile. "Just get me home, Rogers. Get me back to my soldier."

She felt a tiny prick, then a cloud of warmth spread over her. Her vision went black as she slumped into Steve's arms. As gently as he could, Steve lifted Alex into his arms and carried her back to the Quinjet.

Facility Number 2 was successfully destroyed.

Hydra's hybrid experiment was no more.

* * *

Hours passed before Bucky opened his eyes again. The sound of his health monitors drew him from the depth of his slumber, gently nudging him awake with their steady beeping. When his vision cleared, he noticed a marked difference in the pain inside his head. The burning ache in his side was still very much present, but his eyes weren't as foggy and his brain wasn't nearly as fuzzy.

His first instinct was to push himself into a seated position, but to his surprise he found he was already propped up in the bed. He blinked, wincing a little as he felt his wounds talking to him. He looked down at his waist, only to realize another bed had been wheeled in next to his. Lingering stiffness in his neck made it hard to turn his head, but he wanted to see who'd joined him.

His breath was stolen from his chest. "_Alexis_?!"

Dark lashes slowly fluttered opened. Her eyes drifted his direction and when she saw him, a drowsy smile played on her lips. "Hey Sarge."

Her voice was frail, but Bucky could still hear her spirit beneath the weariness. She was propped up similarly to him, wearing a blank tank top with her legs covered by a thin white blanket. Her hair lay limply over her bare shoulders, covering a part of the ink that marked her right arm. To Bucky's relief, she looked unharmed. Given her drowsy affect, he guessed she'd been on her own cocktail of drugs.

"Thank God you're okay." His voice quaked a little. "I was so scared..." He couldn't finish the sentence. Across from him, he saw the comfort of Alex's full smile appear and it breathed life back into him.

Alex weakly lifted her hand across the space between their beds. Bucky reached out and wrapped his metal hand around it, careful not to hurt the site where her IV was. The security of her touch and the warmth it gave him did more for him than any drug could.

"I'm here now," she said, her fingers tightening around his. "I finished it, James. Hydra lost this one."

Bucky felt pride expand inside him. He no longer noticed the pain in his body; only the brightness of life within the woman across from him. He lifted her hand to his mouth and kissed it, wishing he could take her into his arms and wrap her up in his love. "I knew you would."

His gaze lowered only momentarily, which Alex caught, even in her drug-hazed state. It was that little bashful way Bucky had of alerting her whenever something was eating at him but was too shy to mention. "What is it?" she asked, worry slipping into her fragile voice. His blue eyes lifted; open and honest and beautiful.

"What made you do it?"

"You." Her throat bobbed. "Seeing you hurt like that..." She looked away so he wouldn't see the water welling in her eyes. "I couldn't bear seeing you in so much pain. I had to put a stop to it."

Bucky could count on one hand how many people he respected in his life, and Alex was one of them. "I felt you that day, you know" he told her. She heard this and blinked; water settling behind her lashes. "When I was knocked out, I felt something. I don't know what it was, but a part of me knew it was you. Like when you enter my mind and work on my memories. It's become familiar and comforting." His mouth twitched upward. "Sounds dumb, but I think my heart recognizes yours."

Alex knew exactly what he meant, and she didn't think it was dumb at all. It drew the water that hung in her eyes down her cheeks, her heart filling with the wholeness only Bucky could give her.

Lifting the blanket from over her lap, Alex slipped from her bed and climbed into Bucky's. She heard the plates of his arm shift as he tried to give her more room, but she halted him. "This is fine. This is all I want." She nestled onto her side, finding a spot in the crook of his arm. "I just want to lay here with you...like this."

Bucky closed his eyes and let his heart relish in the love he felt in that moment. His teammate was back. His friend. His lover. His everything. Their connection was whole again. Neither of them was alone anymore. They had one another, and they always would.

Bucky drew Alex in closer, his arm hugging her slim body in a protective embrace. He buried his nose in her hair, savoring her. "Rest, darling. I'll be right here."

"I know," she said, feeling another tear slip down her cheek. "I know you will be."


	21. Chapter 21

**One Week Later...**

Bucky chewed on the end of his pen. He reread his journal entry, but something seemed missing. After the past few week's worth of activity, he'd forgotten his beloved notebook. He spent the last hour or so catching up on where he was mentally these days. Still, his entry seemed unfinished:

_ Abdominal wound is healing well. Stitches are out and no longer painful.  
_ _ Banner gave me something to speed up the healing, but it will still leave a scar.  
_ _ Mind has been clear lately. No panic attacks.  
_ _ Alex has done some emotion-sessions with me while healing. Because of it, more and more memories are coming back to me.  
_ _ I remembered the old school yard Steve and I used to play at when we were younger.  
_ _ I also remembered I played baseball, but I don't remember much else.  
_ _ When I told Steve, he mentioned I wasn't very good.  
_ _ I don't believe him.  
_ _ Stark is holding some kind of get together tonight.  
_ _ I think Alex and I are going together, as a couple.  
_ _ I feel a little nervous, mostly because I don't like parties.  
_ _With her, it won't be so bad._

"You almost ready, babe?" Alex called from the kitchen.

"Almost - just one more minute." Bucky poked at his chin with his pen, trying to figure out what was missing from the entry. He tucked a piece of hair behind his ear, wondering if maybe he was just over thinking a simple thing.

But then he remembered.

_ Christmas is a few weeks away.  
_ _ I haven't celebrated Christmas since before the war, but I am going to celebrate it this year.  
_ _ We have a week of Temporary Leave, and I want to take Alex on a trip as a gift.  
_ _ I don't know where yet. I wish I could remember places I wanted to visit when I was younger.  
_ _ I hope I can take her somewhere really nice.  
_ _ For the first time in my life, when I think about the future, I feel excited. _

Bucky smiled and closed the notebook. He shoved it back in its hiding spot beneath the panel in his drawer, recognizing maybe he didn't need to keep it there anymore. Alex had seen him at both his best and his worst, and she loved him anyways. Nothing that he wrote needed to be hidden anymore.

Realizing he needed to hustle, Bucky donned the dress shirt he planned to wear to Stark's party. He rolled the sleeves up to the elbows, doing his best to make it work over the metal of his arm. He took one quick peek at his reflection and smoothed back his hair, then headed out to the kitchen.

When Alex saw him, her eyes grew. She lowered her gaze and took in his bulky body, now highlighted by dark navy pants and one of her favorite button-downs. Even through the fabric, she could see the lines of his abs. The belt he wore sat tight around his boxy waist, which is where Alex's hands went first. "Daaayyuumm." Her voice was a silky purr. "Looking handsome as ever, I see."

After several months together, Bucky was finally getting used to the way Alex responded. Even so, he felt a little bit of heat rise in his face as she openly admired him. The attention always made him feel good, though he would probably never understand what she truly saw. That was the thing about Alex: she always saw something good in him, no matter if it was on the outside or the inside.

Alex eyed the thick muscles of his neck flanked by his shirt collar. She ran her fingers over the fabric, giving the collar a little straightening. Because she was wearing heels, it gave her those few additional key inches to meet Bucky's mouth without needing to rise up onto her toes. She pressed a kiss to his neck and then one to his cheek; the smoothness accented by the scent his aftershave. Her hands ran the length of his shoulders, admiring how well the shirt hugged each rise and fall of muscle beneath. "Every time you wear this baby blue shirt, I get all handsy and flustered."

"I know. That's why I ordered another dozen of them."

Alex saw his smirk and kissed the corner of his mouth. Her lip gloss left a little smudge, which she wiped off with her thumb. "I'll be promptly removing it as soon as we're done at Tony's."

"Careful" he teased, giving her a warning glance. "Banner said anything too strenuous might aggravate the wound."

"Banner-schmanner" she said before their lips met tenderly.

After they parted, Bucky took a moment to admire the slouchy top Alex was wearing. It was a shimmery silver color, with a open neck that hung loosely over one shoulder. Her exposed skin taunted him. His lips craved the taste of her, wanting to mark her from her neck down to her collarbone. He knew if he gave in to that craving there was no way they'd ever make it to Stark's. Instead, he gave a little tug at the fabric with his finger. "This is nice. Is it new?"

"New-ish" she told him. "Do you like like it? It's not too much, I hope?"

"Too _much_?" A small laugh escaped him. "Not at all. You're absolutely stunning."

And she was. The dark hair, the tan skin, those lips he lusted for...it didn't matter to Bucky what she wore, she'd still be the most beautiful woman he ever laid eyes on. She could wear a hoodie and sweatpants and it would still send his heart rate into overdrive.

Cupping her face with both hands, Bucky allowed himself one more taste as his mouth connected with hers. When he pulled away, Alex was smiling. She slipped her hand into his and pulled him towards the door. "Let's go. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can leave."

Bucky shook his head with a laugh. "Is that any way for a guest to act?"

Alex shot him a look, raising one of her shapely eyebrows. She knew how to work her face to make him weak, and this time was no exception. Her choice in eye makeup made her gaze even more alluring than it already was, and the soft pink of whatever gloss she added to her lips made him want to devour them and so much more. The thought alone made his groin tighten.

Willingly, and with a growing smile, Bucky followed after Alex as they headed off to their first party as an official couple.

* * *

Light cocktail music streamed somewhere in the background of Tony Stark's loft as the Avengers assembled under one roof for the evening. They were brought together at Tony's request, if for no other reason than to let off a little steam from the past several weeks worth of work. After putting a notch in their belt in their war against Hydra, Tony thought a small dinner party in celebration was more than worthy. Nothing over the top, of course, but it wouldn't be a Stark party without a little flare. He made sure plenty of bottles of the finest champagne he could buy were made available throughout the gathering, along with platters of hors d'oeuvres to keep everyone satiated (and also so they would drink more).

All of the usuals were there: Steve, Nat, Bucky and Alex, along with Bruce, Sam, and Clint - who made the trip up to Headquarters from a weekend with his family. Wanda and Pepper stood alongside Happy, who was currently entertaining a conversation with both Rhodey and Tony. The group was having a good time, and the laughter around the room and all the relaxed chatter was evidence of it.

To everyone's surprise, Thor even made an appearance. He arrived a little late, but his arrival was nothing short of typical. He greeted each of those assembled, but when he saw Alexis, he called joyfully over the others to grab her attention.

"New One!" He waved an excited hand at her as he made his way over. "We meet again, New One!" His robust voice lifted above the music and voices inside the loft, grabbing Alex's attention away from the group she'd been talking to.

"Thor!?" No sooner had she said his name, she received a hearty hug from the fair haired god. Her eyes bulged at the strength and suddenness of his embrace. "What a surprise! I definitely didn't expect to see you here!?"

"I heard about your victory against Hydra. I couldn't pass up a chance to give you my congratulations." Thor's blue eyes danced as he looked at Bucky, Steve, and Sam who stood around her. "Well done, New One. Well done, indeed."

Bucky gazed at Alex proudly. He slipped an arm around her waist, pulling her in close to give her a kiss on the temple. "She saved all our asses this time." He side-eyed Thor playfully. "You owe her, Odinson."

Thor took the joke in stride as the others laughed along with him. The group continued light conversation, catching up on all things Asgard, as well as all the things Thor missed since he was last at Headquarters.

At one point, Alex excused herself from the group and made a trip to the washroom. When she returned, she headed for the table of champagne to grab a refill. Rows of flutes were being filled with sparkling honey-colored liquid by Stark's latest iteration of talking assistants. This one's name was Friday, and was female. The electronic voice greeted Alex as she approached, asking her how many glasses she'd like. Alex almost said two, but figured she'd better slow down. She already had two glasses and the party barely started.

The metal arm of Friday handed her one of the glasses, and again, Alex had no idea if she should tell the machine thank you. One of these days she'd get the hang of how to interact with the whole Stark-all knowing electro-assistant things...but today was not that day.

"Alexis?"

Alex turned to see Pepper approaching, and she broke out in a smile. "Pepper! So nice to see you!"

Instead of hugging, which Pepper knew might have caused a problem with Alex's sense of touch, they clinked the rim of their glasses in greeting. Alex was blown away by how gorgeous she looked. The tall blonde had chosen a bright red dress with an open collar, showing her flawless skin and proud neck. Her long hair was pulled over one shoulder and done in a loose braid that was both elegant and youthful. Alex could only hope that when she matured, she'd be as cool and effortless as Pepper Pots.

"Are you enjoying yourself so far?" Pepper asked, taking a sip of her champagne.

Alex faced the crowd with a content sigh. "Very much so. It was nice of you and Tony to do this for us."

"Tony needed it just as much, believe me" she said with some knowledge. "The past few weeks were tough on all of you."

Their gazes settled on their respective men across the room. Alex watched Bucky as he spoke with Steve; their large frames turned inward to contain whatever subject they were currently discussing. Bucky's eyes were as alive as ever. She could see their vibrant ocean hues from across the room, and it brought a subtle smile to her face.

Pepper followed Alex's gaze and saw she was staring at Bucky. The look in the young woman's eyes reminded her of herself when she first began dating Tony. She thought it was sweet, and she was happy for her. "Bucky seems to be healing quickly" she mentioned. "You must be relieved?"

Alex glanced at Pepper shyly when she realized she'd been caught staring. "Yes, I am. It was a pretty ugly wound those first few days."

"I'm guessing his super serum helps with the healing process?"

"Definitely." Alex let her eyes wander back to Bucky, whose carefree laughter rose above the chatter in the room. Steve's face had scrunched in laughter as well, which made Alex curious as to what they could be talking about. Whatever it was, it was good to see them like this.

"He's been so happy with you. Whatever you're doing, keep it up." Pepper gave Alex a slight nudge; a small acknowledgement from woman to woman.

Alex was humbled, and took her words to heart. "Believe me, I intend to."

Pepper inhaled, then squared herself in front of Alex. "You know, what you did for Tony..." She kept her voice low, but the amount of gratefulness in her tone never waned. "I can't thank you enough for helping him like you did."

Alex was a little taken by surprise. "Oh, Pepper, it was nothing-"

"-but it was" Pepper said, politely interjecting. "I don't think you know how important it was to Tony. He fretted over asking you about it for weeks."

"Weeks?" Her surprise grew further. The thought of Tony fretting over anything, let alone over an experiment he so vehemently turned down, left her a little speechless.

Pepper nodded. "I just wanted to thank you myself. It meant a lot to us both." She smiled. "It's amazing what you can do."

Alex felt undeserving all over again. It would take time for her to get used to people finding some kind of goodness in her powers, especially after a lifetime of feeling cursed by them. As graciously as she could, Alex accepted Pepper's blessing. "Well then, you are both _very _ welcome" she told her. "And if Tony ever decides he wants to try again..."

With a laugh, Pepper raised her flute. "I'll be sure to direct him your way."

The women shared a knowing glance and another clink of their glasses, then drank to the progress that had been made between their men.

Across the room, Bucky and Steve stood with their own champagne flutes while talking about this and that. Inevitably, Bucky's eyes wandered across the floor in search of Alex. When he saw her at the drink table speaking with Pepper, his face fell. "Uh oh."

Steve had been downing a little of his bubbly when Bucky uttered this, which lead his gaze over to the drink table. He saw the two women there, smiling over their drinks and talking. He met Bucky's expectant gaze.

"Think they're talking about us?" Bucky asked.

"Us?" Steve shook his head. "Maybe talking about _you_, but definitely not talking about me."

Bucky frowned. "Why just me and not you?"

Steve wrapped an arm around his friend's shoulders and pointed with his glass. "See the way Alex is smiling down at her drink? See how Pepper is nudging her?" Steve facially shrugged. It was all he needed to know. "They're talking about you, pal."

Bucky blew a raspberry and took a swig of champagne. "You're crazy."

"It's what women do when they talk about their guys. They get all smiley and start telling stories about how happy they are."

"How the hell do you know?"

"I don't." Steve took a drink. "But Alex always smiles like that whenever someone mentions you, so I'm just putting one and one together here." He watched Bucky's eyebrows bend in confusion as he chanced another glance at the women. He watched them clink their glasses and laugh happily.

"Okay, maybe you're right..." Bucky conceded.

Steve pressed his lips together to try and suppress the laugh that wanted so badly to come out. "How is it that you nabbed such a cool girl with such an embarrassing lack of knowledge about women?"

"Speak for yourself, bud."

"I'm surprised you've lasted this long, to be honest."

Bucky shoved Steve in the shoulder, only to get a burst of laughter from his friend in return. Bucky continued to give him a side-eye, but even he couldn't hold his laugh back.

"I'm just _dying _to know what's so funny over here" Alex said, sidling up to the pair.

Both Steve and Bucky immediately composed themselves, looking uncannily like two soldiers caught doing something wrong in front of a drill sergeant.

"Stevie's just being a jerk, as usual" Bucky told her.

Alex saw his eyes shift sideways at Steve, who looked at her with feigned innocence. It would always amaze her how two century-old men would forever look and act like teenagers whenever they were together. In fact, Alex found the whole thing to be rather charming, and it showed in the smile she gave them. "You two are ridiculous."

"Affirmative" Steve answered.

A _tink-tink-tink _of metal on glass could be heard. Steve, Bucky, and Alex turned their attention towards the sound as the chatter around the room slowly dwindled. They saw Tony stepping forward, rapping a fork on the glass to gather everyone's attention. The music and voices softened in curious anticipation as Tony cleared his throat. "First off, thank you all for bothering to make the trip down the hallway to be here tonight. I feel very loved."

The group chuckled, casually forming a semi-circle around Tony. He stood before his colleagues and friends, his dark eyes grazing over each one of them with admiration. "You know, I don't think we do this sort of thing often enough, which is definitely on me...But it's also not often that we have the time or the energy to do it. It's been pretty nonstop these days, fighting against the assholes of this world." He paused, tipping his chin towards Thor. "Or the assholes of other worlds, be that as it may."

Thor raised his glass with a knowing smile.

Tony's gaze lingered on the crowd before it settled on Alexis. She was standing alongside Bucky, leaning into him with his arm wrapped about her waist. A subtle smile graced her pretty face, and Tony returned it with one of his own. "But since we're lucky enough to have the time to gather here _tonight_, let me take a minute to raise my glass to someone I think we all appreciate a little more these days." His eyes sparkled as he lifted his flute of champagne. "That someone being Alexis Markos."

Alex straightened in surprise. She looked around the room to see the rest of the Avengers all raising their glasses in her honor, feeling suddenly overwhelmed by the display. Her eyes met Bucky's, whose smile was the brightest of all. He looked at her with those stunning blue eyes, so full of love and affection and not a hint of surprise at the acknowledgement she was receiving.

When Alex turned back to Tony, he raised his glass a little higher. "You've earned your place here as an Avenger, Markos. You've also earned the right to give us shit whenever you want, because you risked a hell of a lot to save us. You've made us proud time and time over. I think I speak for all of us when I say: we're glad you're a part of this family."

The words went straight to Alex's heart, putting a mark there that would be with her forever. She found herself blinking away tears as Tony closed the toast.

"To Alexis!" he said proudly.

"_To Alexis!"_echoed the group.

Alex wiped away the single tear that had betrayed her and rolled down her cheek. She couldn't stop the laugh that came from her either; stunned to silence at all the eyes staring at her with a love she next expected any of them to have.

And next to her stood her soldier, his big grin lighting up his face as he turned and cupped the back of her head, drawing her in for a kiss that solidified it all. The group's voice rose in a chorus of hoots and hollers at the display of affection, their applause driving Bucky to dip Alex in his arms as he deepened the kiss. Even louder cheers rang out at the sight, causing Alex to break the kiss because she couldn't stop laughing.

Bucky held her in his arms, nuzzling his nose to hers. "I've never been prouder of you than I am right now. I hope you know that."

Alex caressed the line of his jaw, her fingertips grazing his full bottom lip. "And I've never been prouder to be your girl." She kissed him, and once again, the chorus of cheers from the Avengers standing around them was like a song of acceptance.

The music began again, and more drinks were passed around to fill those emptied by the toast. Alex stood, but remained in Bucky's arms, their eyes focused only on one another as they stood together.

"I love you, James" she told him, her voice hushed but full of affection.

He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you too, Alexis."

"Best team ever?" she asked with a grin.

Bucky laughed, and it filled Alex's heart with joy. "Best team ever."  
  


* * *

* * *

**  
...EPILOGUE...**

A couple of weeks later, Bucky and Alex stood in front of an old apartment complex in the middle of Brooklyn, New York. A gentle snowfall dusted the sidewalks and the rooftops with a shimmer of white, giving the somewhat beat up looking complex a fresher appearance. It was a brick building, three stories high, and had seen better days. Although from the looks of the newly renovated stairway that lead upward to each separate story of the building, perhaps someone was finally putting some work into making the place look a little better.

The couple stood on the sidewalk facing the building, staring up at the historic brick architecture. They were eating ice cream - chocolate, to be exact - which seemed an obvious contrast to the heavy winter coats they wore and the snowflakes that fell on their shoulders.

Bucky licked at his cone, his eyes never leaving the apartment building. Next to him, Alex swallowed a bit of ice cream from her spoon. "Do you remember it?"

"I do."

Alex looked at him, hope in her brown eyes. "Really?"

Bucky smiled. "See that window, next to the stairway? That was mine and my sisters' bedroom." He gazed up at the old window and took another long lick of his ice cream. "I can't believe it's still here."

Returning her own gaze to the window, Alex tried to imagine a younger version of James. She didn't have any pictures to go off of, only her imagination, but she could almost see a little boy with large blue eyes and mussed up hair looking out that window at a world he didn't quite understand yet.

Bucky's free hand reached for Alex's, clasping it tight in his gloved hand. "Thank you for this" he told her. Tiny little flakes danced around his face, falling on his nose and his cheeks. The tenderness in his eyes spoke volumes, but he wanted her to know the true depth of his appreciation. "Thank you for everything."

Alex squeezed his hand. "You're welcome, James."

They stood there a moment longer, their fingers intwined and their gazes lingering on Bucky's old childhood home. They ate their ice cream in the middle of December and watched it snow around them, reveling in how far they both had come in just the past few months. Bucky could now remember his old house, his sisters, his parents, and what his bedroom looked like. Pieces of his past were coming back to him, and he had Alexis to thank. He had her to thank for so much of the goodness that was in his life, and he'd do everything in his power to prove his love to her and show her just how much she meant to him.

With one final look, Bucky said goodbye to his childhood home. The past would always be the past whether he remembered it or not. But now, with Alex in his life, the future meant so much more to him. He gazed down at her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Together, they turned and walked away, leaving the past behind and looking ahead to a future together.

And while the future was never guaranteed, one thing remained certain: for as long as James and Alexis were together, they would be lonesome no more.

** The End.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Author's (Final) Note: **
> 
> **And so we've come to the conclusion of the tale. I hate that it has to end because I've fallen in love with Alexis while writing this, and I've really grown fond of writing Bucky with her as well. I don't want their story to end, but it seemed like this was a good place to end this particular tale.**
> 
> **I honestly can't believe I've finished my very first Marvel fic. When I began this, I had very little hope. I've always written Star Wars fics and thought Marvel might be too much of a bear to handle. So many Avengers, so many voices, so many different personalities and abilities. I love Marvel, I love Bucky and the Avengers, so I figured what the hell - why not try it? And now I've finished it. I had no idea the story would receive as much love as it has, and I thank you all for that. You really were driving me to make it better than I imagined, and all your kudos, comments, bookmarks, etc. helped me to continue posting.**
> 
> **At the heart of this fic, my goal was to explore the psychological aspect to Bucky's past and present. I wanted to create an OC and have her eventually pair up with him, and through her point of view explore Bucky's mental state while also exploring her own. Alex was meant to be Bucky's anchor as much as he was meant to be hers. There was a reason they were able to touch one another and not have the potential repercussions that Alex had when touching anyone else. They were meant to be together from the start, and their lives would enhance equally because of it. At the beginning, both Alex and Bucky had issues with controlling themselves in their own ways. When they found one another, they realized they could help the other with those issues of control. I hope the way I wrote them reflected this well.**
> 
> **I've always stood by the fact that Bucky was never a monster. He was never a villain. He was a war veteran with a horrifying past that he, and only he, could overcome in time. With Alex's help, he was given the push he needed to find control, to find peace, and to find happiness. I never wanted to take that away from him. Alex was meant to compliment him, just as he was meant to compliment her. Her lack of control and her lack of confidence in her own ability to help rather than hurt was something only Bucky would understand and be able to help her achieve. Again, I hope the story conveyed this well. **
> 
> **Tony was right. Each Avenger has their own demons...but it's how they handle those demons and overcome their personal struggles together that defines them. And that includes Tony Stark. ☺**
> 
> **Thank you all so much for taking the time to read my story. Thank you to all who left comments and kudos, and thank you to all those quiet observers and enjoyers out there. You have made writing this and finishing it incredibly enjoyable for me!**
> 
> **Also: I kind of left a few moments in there where I could totally do some follow-up oneshot stories (Bucky's Christmas gift to Alex, anyone??), if it would interest you to read? I may even do a follow-up story with Bucky and Alex in the future as well, assuming anyone would read it. I'm really not ready to let them go just yet....so even if no one read anything about them ever again from me, I might still write it. Totally self-indulgent, I know, but I'm sure you all understand. Who doesn't want to picture Bucky naked a few more times?? (C'mon, I know you were all thinking it, don't pretend you weren't ;) haha)**
> 
> **Thanks again everyone. This has been amazingly fun!  
\--Winter  
**


End file.
